I'm pretty amazing.

[Thoggy]

No, seriously.

I don't like to brag but I've really got it going on.

For starters, I'm well travelled. I've been from Oakville to Ajax and back again. If you're not from the Toronto area, let's just say that would use up more than half a tank of gas. That's right...more than half.

I currently possess not one, not two, not three, but FOUR limbs.

My ears are on either side of my head with my nose in between if you're shallow and that superficial crap matters to you.

I guess what really sets me apart is my humble nature.

I'll be talking with someone who is the worst and I'll think, God bless you Thoggy for hanging out with this cow puncher. I can completely zone out in a conversation just thinking about how good it is of me to be hanging out with what's his face here.

Anyhoo...I'd like to invite you into the warm cocoon of my presence.

We can talk, laugh, eat, pray, love actually.

It may have been a mistake to write this ad this in the morning. Guess I picked a bad week to quit drinking and start doing meth.

Say hi if you're similarly awesome. I'm a man in my thirties in Toronto by the way. Looking for a lady in the sleet and a whore in the redboom.

T

 

[DirtySecrets11]

Best. Read. Ever.

Ajax to Oakville...very impressive! I'm curious how big your socks are.

 

[Deleted member 1379218]

I currently possess not one, not two, not three, but FOUR limbs.

My ears are on either side of my head with my nose in between if you're shallow and that superficial crap matters to you.

T

LMFAO i mean what more do you need really

 

[Thoggy]

Best. Read. Ever.

Ajax to Oakville...very impressive! I'm curious how big your socks are.

My sock size is none of your business, you wanton harlot.

 

[Tallulah82]

bumping this because I saw it yesterday and made me laugh out loud

Good luck!

 

[LizzieEr]

I started doing Meth this week. After a couple of days, she said I had her name wrong... Meg...
I mean who names their daughter Meg, right?
Anyway, I got myself tested and I am hard of hearing. At least I am hard of something... Yeah?

I have been told I need to work on my humour, by some people. Mostly jealous people.

But, yeah, you sound pretty darn awesome. I was once sent a PM by someone who said he was very interesting and he turned out to be exactly that. So I am inclined to believe your advertisement 100%.

I actually love to talk about food and laugh during prayers but the for the rest, I am pretty damn awesome too.

On an unrelated note, my tablet is a right sloot.

 

[Eva_Star]

Cow puncher. I have no idea what that means but I'm going to use it. Consider it *stolen*.


http://e.lvme.me/jn87h29.jpg


*If I was a single woman....rwarrr.*

 

[Thoggy]

Cow puncher. I have no idea what that means but I'm going to use it. Consider it *stolen*.


http://e.lvme.me/jn87h29.jpg


*If I was a single woman....rwarrr.*

Spoken like a true cow puncher.

Also, I was in fact referencing Airplane. So, well done you.

Striker

 

[LIVINRFANTASIES]

Dollie

We are all amazing in many ways. We've traveled around many states but we've been afraid if we leave the country they wouldn't let us back in.
The real trouble with most people they think they have to go to exotic islands and strange places like Paris when their own back yards can be amazing.

Like that Humpredrink singer, I'm humble in many ways. You should see me in a tight sweater and mesh stockings. Actually I don't wear stockings but my vericous veins make it look that way.

We can talk, laugh, eat, pray, love actually. I only pray that my husband doesn't find out but I'm good at eating BBQ and fried chicken.

The amazing part is I'm way older than you and prefer men with pointed ears and a third eye.

 

[Eva_Star]

I am not sure this *connection* that we have is going to work out. (I mean come on, the sexual tension between us is overwhelming). You have taken me down a dark trail of knowledge seeking. Cow punching is not the happy activity that it seems.

http://www.cowboypoetry.com/imagestwo/remunbranded.jpg

And I never want to tell a cow puncher how to do his job but those animals are clearly horses. Friggin cow punchers. They never do anything right.

 

[LIVINRFANTASIES]

Dollie

And I never want to tell a cow puncher how to do his job but those animals are clearly horses. Friggin cow punchers. They never do anything right.


How can you tell the difference. My older sister had a farm and milked cows that looked like that.

Once a cow pooped on my husband. He punched it between the eyes. He's a real cow puncher.

 

[Thoggy]

I am not sure this *connection* that we have is going to work out. (I mean come on, the sexual tension between us is overwhelming). You have taken me down a dark trail of knowledge seeking. Cow punching is not the happy activity that it seems.

http://www.cowboypoetry.com/imagestwo/remunbranded.jpg

And I never want to tell a cow puncher how to do his job but those animals are clearly horses. Friggin cow punchers. They never do anything right.

Look, here's what I am going to suggest.

We have sex two or three hundred times. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out but at least we know.

I'm glad you mentioned the sexual tension as I'm pretty bad at reading the room. It felt like sexual tension to me, but the last time I thought that, I turned out to be wrong. Let's just say my buddy was pretty pissed at me for interrupting his wedding to tell his fiancee her tits looked amazing in that dress.

 

[Eva_Star]

Look, here's what I am going to suggest.

We have sex two or three hundred times. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out but at least we know.

I'm glad you mentioned the sexual tension as I'm pretty bad at reading the room. It felt like sexual tension to me, but the last time I thought that, I turned out to be wrong. Let's just say my buddy was pretty pissed at me for interrupting his wedding to tell his fiancee her tits looked amazing in that dress.

That happens to the best of us. Reminds me of that time my priest was being all flirty and asked if I had anything that I needed to confess. I said "oh, I bet you'd like that, wouldn't you? The dirtier the better?" Apparently, I read that situation wrong. Did you know that you can get banned from a confessional?

 

[Dodger93]

Bruh how high are you rn?

 

[Tallulah82]

Bruh how high are you rn?

Ha! You wanting some Thoggy juice? Erm, I mean, some of what he's having, not...his 'juice'




(but if it is his 'juice' and you get some, let me know what it's like... Thog and Dodge sounds like an interesting thing I would get in on )

 

[LIVINRFANTASIES]

Dollie

my buddy was pretty pissed at me for interrupting his wedding to tell his fiancee her tits looked amazing in that dress.

If your so amazing, why do so many brides wear dresses that expose so much breast?

 

[Chris_Michael]

We can talk, laugh, eat, pray, love actually.

Hey don't get me wrong, I love that movie too, but damn... It aint good enough to pray to.

YES, I said I love that movie. Don't judge me!

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51-CU01Fp4L._SX940_.jpg​

 

[Dodger93]

Ha! You wanting some Thoggy juice? Erm, I mean, some of what he's having, not...his 'juice'




(but if it is his 'juice' and you get some, let me know what it's like... Thog and Dodge sounds like an interesting thing I would get in on )

Pfft, come off it Tal, you know I'm as good as gold and don't partake in anything of either sort

 

[Thoggy]

I am no longer amazing.

All good things must come to an end, and sadly, I feel I must update you with some bitter news.

Despite my best efforts, I did not win a Golden Globe award last night.

I was pretty psyched going into it, as I remembered telling a buddy a movie idea I had at a bar one night that seemed like a sure winner. I don't recall the details but I do think that it had Schmidt from New Girl in it.

So, for all of you who thought I was the real deal and this would really go somewhere, I'm sorry. I've failed you.

But most importantly, I've failed myself.

I'd encourage all of you to move on to someone more worthy of your trust and admiration. I'd suggest Eva_Star.