Trying this once more. (Dept. of Women Who Need to be Humiliated and Degraded)

[refreshingbore]

I realize now that I should have been more specific in my first ad. So I will lay out some particular stipulations here.

1. Please, if you can help it at all, do not be a huge flake. Life gets in the way of all of us, I understand. But I would prefer it if you not respond if you don't imagine you would be able to communicate at least a few times a week. ("a few times" is hopelessly vague, yes, but hopefully communicates the idea)

2. Begin your first response with the phrase "I am a dumb slut." Yes, I get that me insisting upon that right off the bat makes me out to be some pretender to the dom throne, but, I don't care. This is supposed to be for fun. I'm not asking you to be my slave for life in some D&D fanboy jackoff fantasy. And if it makes you uncomfortable or hesitant, then so much the better. I like to push buttons. Oh, and include that in the actual body of the text, and not the subject line... Thank you.

3. I know as far as online interactions are concerned, anonymity is paramount for many or most of us, but please at least be willing to do things like:
- send me photos of things that I've told you to write on your body
- send me recordings of you reciting things I've instructed you to say for me
- send me pictures of handwritten notes in response to my requests/assignments

4. ACTUALLY FOR REAL, FOR REAL BE WILLING TO BE HUMILIATED! DEGRADED! PUT IN YOUR PLACE!!!!! Who knows... it might actually do something for you.

5. Be willing to engage in some play-misogyny. (i.e., being turned on by being called or calling yourself things such as "a dumb bitch who is only good for taking cock")

6. Wardrobe control is something that I enjoy. If you don't get turned on by someone telling you what underwear to choose or at least reporting back to him what you are wearing underneath your everyday clothes, then maybe don't respond.

7. Key phrases here are, "I'm sorry", "please", and "thank you". If the thought of saying those on a frequent basis in a sexual context doesn't make you wet, then maybe don't respond.

8. I am not a huge asshole, nor do I hate women. If you have questions about stuff, then just ask. I'm fairly open (or so I would hope)

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

disclaimer: I'm not responding to your ad

However, I'm genuinely curious as to what type of person requires humiliation, degradation, and shit talk as part of their relationship dynamic.

Would you mind elaborating here?

Eta: this is an actual question, btw, not just trying to give you a hard time..

 

[refreshingbore]

Ha... I'm not Freud or any of the subsequent would-be explainers of the human psyche, so I don't think I can give you a satisfactory answer of sorts.

My take, though, goes something like this. Starting from early childhood we learn about power (and sadly, in some instances, its abuse). Experimenting with it and experiencing how to wield it is hugely wound-up with the parent-child as well as so many other formative dynamics. So obviously it looms large in all of our psyches, and colors so much of what we do and how we approach life.

Additionally, I'd venture to say that many of us feel uncomfortable with the way that all of that might play out in our own lives. Maybe we feel we are burdened with the responsibility of exercising too much power. Or alternatively, we feel like we are nebbishes who are busy being clobbered by modern life and so many of its attendant indignities so much of the time. Or, perhaps most likely, we feel a little of both. Add into this the messy swirl of gender politics, and it generates the potential for a heady onrush of sexual whoop-whoop. I would guess, anyhow.

However, I'm genuinely curious as to what type of person requires humiliation, degradation, and shit talk as part of their relationship dynamic.

Would you mind elaborating here?

Eta: this is an actual question, btw, not just trying to give you a hard time..

 

[refreshingbore]

So, for certain open-minded, mature-ish people it can be fun. A means of exploring those somewhat bewildering forces and the tensions that they produce in a hopefully somewhat safe playground of sorts.

 

[refreshingbore]

Just realized that above response probably addressed a D/s dynamic more than a humiliation/degradation thing. But, I think there are reasonable parallels to be made. Meaning, we all struggle with self-esteem issues (well, some of us do) as well as bouts of narcissistic grandiosity. And all of that is intimately tied up with our sexual lives and our social lives in general. So, presumably there is a charge inherent in flaunting what societal mores may happen to recommend regarding our self-images... especially as they may pertain to our sexual behavior and official prescriptions regarding what makes us good girls or bad boys and all of that...

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

Ha... I'm not Freud or any of the subsequent would-be explainers of the human psyche, so I don't think I can give you a satisfactory answer of sorts.

My take, though, goes something like this. Starting from early childhood we learn about power (and sadly, in some instances, its abuse). Experimenting with it and experiencing how to wield it is hugely wound-up with the parent-child as well as so many other formative dynamics. So obviously it looms large in all of our psyches, and colors so much of what we do and how we approach life.

Additionally, I'd venture to say that many of us feel uncomfortable with the way that all of that might play out in our own lives. Maybe we feel we are burdened with the responsibility of exercising too much power. Or alternatively, we feel like we are nebbishes who are busy being clobbered by modern life and so many of its attendant indignities so much of the time. Or, perhaps most likely, we feel a little of both. Add into this the messy swirl of gender politics, and it generates the potential for a heady onrush of sexual whoop-whoop. I would guess, anyhow.

So, for certain open-minded, mature-ish people it can be fun. A means of exploring those somewhat bewildering forces and the tensions that they produce in a hopefully somewhat safe playground of sorts.

Thank you for taking the time to answer. As suspected, the answer in no way changed my opinion, but I agree, if consenting adults desire such interaction, it's NOMB.

Good luck.

 

[refreshingbore]

Sure, always glad to shoot my mouth off!!

 

[WykdWytch]

What type of person requires humiliation, degradation

.......

 

[refreshingbore]

Your story rests on its own merits, doubtlessly. But can you maybe split things into paragraphs next time??

Maybe I can answer this question for you. I am the eldest child and daughter of immigrant parents, I am the 1st generation to be brought up in this country. My upbringing was very different than my "American friends". Growing up was like having both feet in 2 very different cultures. My parents were very strict, I was raised catholic, I was sexually molested at a very young age, I am highly intelligent and have an above average IQ. I am extremely responsible and from a young age was depended on by my parents to be their translator, write and read for them, I helped them to become american citizens when I was in 6th grade. I was a perfect child, a gifted student, a loyal friend. I excel in my career, I have had only long term relationships and have never been promiscuous. I was extremely shy as a child and that carried over into my teenage years and early 20's. I don't ask for respect, I demand it. I have never been treated or felt inferior to anyone, except as a very young child when on occasion some individual would berate my mother of father in my presence about not being able to speak proper english ie:"Your in America, learn to speak english". Now sexually, I enjoy being submissive, I love being humiliated, called a slut, degraded and made to feel dirty. But that does not mean anyone is going to say these things to me in my day to day life. I just like it during sex. I hope this enlightens you and others on "what type of person requires humiliation?" I don't require it, I enjoy it. Sorry for taking up so much of your time.

 

[WykdWytch]

.......

 

[Primalex]

I like her already.

 

[barefootgirl69]

The term "douchebag" generally refers to a male with a certain combination of obnoxious characteristics related to attitude, social ineptitude, public behavior, or outward presentation.

Though the common douchebag thinks he is accepted by the people around him, most of his peers dislike him. He has an inflated sense of self-worth, compounded by a lack of social grace and self-awareness. He behaves inappropriately in public, yet is completely ignorant to how pathetic he appears to others.

He often talks about how cool, successful, and popular he is, yet never catches on to the fact that he comes across as a total loser. Nevertheless, he firmly believes that he is the smartest, most desirable, and most charming person in the room... and will try to bad-rep anyone who would threaten to expose this facade.

He fancies himself a ladies’ man, yet tends to be a joke to all but the most naive of women.

How's that?

Beautiful paragraphs.
*applauds*

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

Maybe I can answer this question for you. I am the eldest child and daughter of immigrant parents, I am the 1st generation to be brought up in this country. My upbringing was very different than my "American friends". Growing up was like having both feet in 2 very different cultures. My parents were very strict, I was raised catholic, I was sexually molested at a very young age, I am highly intelligent and have an above average IQ. I am extremely responsible and from a young age was depended on by my parents to be their translator, write and read for them, I helped them to become american citizens when I was in 6th grade. I was a perfect child, a gifted student, a loyal friend. I excel in my career, I have had only long term relationships and have never been promiscuous. I was extremely shy as a child and that carried over into my teenage years and early 20's. I don't ask for respect, I demand it. I have never been treated or felt inferior to anyone, except as a very young child when on occasion some individual would berate my mother of father in my presence about not being able to speak proper english ie:"Your in America, learn to speak english". Now sexually, I enjoy being submissive, I love being humiliated, called a slut, degraded and made to feel dirty. But that does not mean anyone is going to say these things to me in my day to day life. I just like it during sex. I hope this enlightens you and others on "what type of person requires humiliation?" I don't require it, I enjoy it. Sorry for taking up so much of your time.

I enjoy being called "slut" under the right circumstances.

Perhaps "degrade" and"humiliate" hold stronger negative connotations for me. A little light hearted ""slut" or "my good little whore" are turn ons, but fuck meat, cum dump, pig, etc. Meh.... Those would be hard limits for me and would probably earn you the privilege of picking your teeth up off the floor.

I tend to be very sensitive to intentionally trying to break one's spirit. So far, the ones I've seen advertising this kind of treatment (JohnnyBrando comes to mind) come off as being more after the conquest of breaking a sub and then adding her to an imaginary line of belt notches than actually pursuing a relationship with her that includes the nurturing necessary to maintain the exchange. (No offense to the OP or the other guy for that matter, that's just my interpretation when you are advertising humiliation, degradation, etc.)

You didn't take up my time, Dear, I asked a question, and you answered. Thank you.

 

[refreshingbore]

Oh sheesh... This site is called "Literotica". But there is an absurd number of people who post on here and who seemingly have trouble with the rudiments of written communication. I'm not saying that you are one of them. HOWEVER, if you are trying to say something important, then why not try to make it easier for your intended audience to understand you? Give us a slight break every now and then instead of throwing everything into one huge lump. Everyone has something of value to say, obviously. But please don't torture your potential readers with disregard as to how they will physically take in your message. (Unless that happens to be part of your sadism schtick...)

Speaking as a "douchebag", a lack of paragraph breaks make my eyeballs and brain hurt and comes across like blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Vomit. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. It makes me not care about what you are trying to say, no matter how compelling your story might be.

The term "douchebag" generally refers to a male with a certain combination of obnoxious characteristics related to attitude, social ineptitude, public behavior, or outward presentation.

Though the common douchebag thinks he is accepted by the people around him, most of his peers dislike him. He has an inflated sense of self-worth, compounded by a lack of social grace and self-awareness. He behaves inappropriately in public, yet is completely ignorant to how pathetic he appears to others.

He often talks about how cool, successful, and popular he is, yet never catches on to the fact that he comes across as a total loser. Nevertheless, he firmly believes that he is the smartest, most desirable, and most charming person in the room... and will try to bad-rep anyone who would threaten to expose this facade.

He fancies himself a ladies’ man, yet tends to be a joke to all but the most naive of women.

How's that?

 

[WykdWytch]

;-))))

 

[WykdWytch]

)))

 

[refreshingbore]

Hmm, do you have any idea how hypocritical you are being? I'm the one throwing the "hissy fit" and who should have had the etiquette to privately share my thoughts about your post. Meanwhile, you've now indulged yourself with two posts on this thread which serve no purpose other then to lash out at and insult me, presumably in an effort to soothe your wounded ego. If that isn't a perfect example of someone trying to build themselves up by making others feel small, then I don't know what it is.

If you go back and read my initial comment regarding your post, it consisted of a tossed-off request to have consideration for potential readers and to make your ideas more eyeball-friendly. Then you immediately got offended and went into mad projection mode.

I'm sorry, but I really, really, REALLY dislike when people approach things the way that you did. Instead of shrugging off my "hissy fit", or taking a humble approach and maybe learning something from it, or simply responding to me as one human being to another, you instantly lashed out and took the opportunity to belittle me. Frankly, that is a really shitty way of interacting with people.

Perhaps if you were as knowledgeable in social etiquette, as you so obviously are in grammar, this little hissy fit of yours could have played out privately, instead of publicly.

It would have been a kind gesture to PM me and advise me of my terrible faux pas.

Obviously you have to build yourself up, by making others feel small. It paints the perfect picture of who you are as a person. Good luck with your'e novel...I mean your search for assistance in the masturbatory department.

 

[WykdWytch]

))

 

[JamesRTickit]

Where do we go from here?

I think the ladies have a knock out victory.
Well done and hardly any humiliation involved

 

[debbiev]

I think the ladies have a knock out victory.
Well done and hardly any humiliation involved

i disagree James...refreshingbore never said anything that could be considered mean or disrespectful, this was his first comment to WykdWytch after she tried to analyze his post through her own experiences in life..."Your story rests on its own merits, doubtlessly. But can you maybe split things into paragraphs next time??"

nothing wrong with what he said...but WykdWytch then proceeds to jump all over him and call him a douche bag" and then proceeds to explain exactly why. which by the way was totally rude of her.

also i happen to know refreshingbore...it was for a short time but i can tell you he is sincere and a pretty cool guy....and defintely doesn't say things to hurt people. so not sure why WykdWytch had a stick up her butt but she is the rude one here...or in her own terms, the "douche bag".

So James...read the entire thread before being a wimp and siding with who you think is more popular.

 

[JamesRTickit]

Debbie

Thank you

My take on this differs from yours.
Which is fine.
Til you ruined your argument by getting personal.
Have an opinion but keep it on course.

 

[debbiev]

Thank you

My take on this differs from yours.
Which is fine.
Til you ruined your argument by getting personal.
Have an opinion but keep it on course.

James, your take is completely wrong...read the entire thread and then see which person became cruel and really for no reason.

btw i apologize for getting personal.....i shouldn't have done that and you didn't deserve that...i'm sorry.

 

[WykdWytch]

.......

 

[WykdWytch]

.......

 

[Primalex]

"Your story rests on its own merits, doubtlessly. But can you maybe split things into paragraphs next time??"

nothing wrong with what he said...

I will disagree with this statement. If you can't read four sentences without a paragraph in between, then the problem is not the writer, but the reader. There is no reason to turn forum posts into WhatsApp messages. The job of a paragraph is to split text into distinct sections. I really can't see where you would put a paragraph in the posted text without actually destroying the coherence.