Relationships & Cheating

[PVodogaz]

Here's two questions for posters;

1. How many people have had their partners caught at cheating and how did it happen?

2. How has it affected later relationships? Within the trust issue.

This can include offline or online.

 

[bill-pix-trade]

I cheated at wist one time, but my wife was my partner so it did not really matter.

 

[PVodogaz]

I cheated at wist one time, but my wife was my partner so it did not really matter.

LOL good point.

 

[Cheyenne]

Here's two questions for posters;

1. How many people have had their partners caught at cheating and how did it happen?

2. How has it affected later relationships? Within the trust issue.

This can include offline or online.

1. No
2. Not applicable


But this could be an interesting thread if people who have been affected by cheating posted to it.

 

[sunstruck]

I think this has now replaced ass sex as the most discussed topic at Lit.

 

[PinkOrchid]

 

[Bent]

Originally posted by PVodogaz
1. How many people have had their partners caught at cheating and how did it happen?

2. How has it affected later relationships? Within the trust issue.

This can include offline or online.

I haven't caught Colin cheating, and if it happened, I wouldn't accept it.

 

[RawHumor]

That sucks. I much prefer ass sex to cheating.

Ooooh, me too.

 

[potatohead]

What about cheating with ass sex?

Yes, I've cheated...it was a long time ago and it was at the end of a relationship. Still feel guilty about it to this day. And it has affected my relationships since then.

 

[PVodogaz]

Another what could of been an interesting thread gets hijacked by stupidity with a Capital S

 

[sunstruck]

I just made an observation. Calm down dude. If you're really interested just keep posting, or just read one of the hundred other threads on the topic.

 

[Bent]

Originally posted by PVodogaz
Another what could of been an interesting thread gets hijacked by stupidity with a Capital S

That's when you just bring it right back around...

I have known people who have caught their spouse cheating, and most of them just moved on with it, and stayed married...I don't think I could do that.

 

[PVodogaz]

I just made an observation. Calm down dude. If you're really interested just keep posting, or just read one of the hundred other threads on the topic.

I'm calm I have seen many a good thread get wrecked by posting of a stupid level. And I have not seen a thread in this forum on cheating specifically hence i posted.

And its cool with your observation, Wasn't stating you were the issue of my little outburst.

Petar

 

[sunstruck]

https://forum.literotica.com/search...=1504779&sortby=lastpost&sortorder=descending

Ok, so there are only 50. Definitely doesn't beat ass sex.

 

[PVodogaz]

Sorry for not looking, i see the first page only and dont have the time to go through 55 forum pages.

But ty for the link i will read. Its a subject close to my heart having a online relationship fall apart after she stated she had been cheating

Petar

 

[living2serve]

My husband cheated about two and a half years ago while I was pregnant with our third child. He left me, and started messing with a girl who pretty much wanted my life. It hurt like hell and did significant damage to the relationship as well. Have i gotten over it. Hell no. I'd be lying if i said I was totally over it and trusted him completely. It's a healing process that will never end. Sometimes something happens that reopens the scar. It may have nothing to do with him even, like a song that reminds me of it, or another friend going through a similiar situation, and I feel like I'm back at square one. Other days, I see the good that came out of it in that it made us both open our eyes to what was wrong with our relationship. We were both unhappy with how things were going at the present time. He just made the just made the wrong choice in how to deal. I still have my days when I make a snide comment about it to him, and I still plot to do dasterdly things to her as well. It's human. If you both want the relationship to work, you will both have to fight for it. It's not easy. It sure isn't fair to have to try and forgive and move on. To this day I feel like he didn't have to give nearly as much of himself as I had to in repairing our relationship. On a positive note, we are now happier and stronger than ever, with three beautiful kids, and the rest of out lives together to look forward to. Do a little soul searching and decide what is best foryou. Good luck.

 

[Cheyenne]

I think this has now replaced ass sex as the most discussed topic at Lit.

I think it is actually the definition of cheating that is a much discussed topic.

There are far fewer threads asking what the reaction was to fiding out a spouse was cheating.

 

[DevineDD]

Happened in 2000 he cheated 3 times, lied so much I didn't know when he was telling the truth, almost got the big D, 6 months later decided the grass was not greener on the other side.

I still don't trust him all the way but we have been married 10 yrs now and been together 16. I did have a few relationship while he was gone but I love him and its good. It will never be the same again tho

 

[Guest]

Without too much detail, my ex husband had an affair with a colleague of ours. Our 8 year old (at the time) daughter walked in on them in bed together. Needless to say, we are divorced now. I am much happier without him, and never EVER see myself getting married ever again. He proved to me that marriage is just a piece of paper and isn't worth shit. I will never be in a monogamous relationship again....I won't let myself trust anyone like that ever again. I have my Baby in Boston who I love dearly and I have a couple of people a little closer to home when I feel like having fun. I'm happy and plan to stay this way.

 

[PVodogaz]

Happened in 2000 he cheated 3 times, lied so much I didn't know when he was telling the truth, almost got the big D, 6 months later decided the grass was not greener on the other side.

I still don't trust him all the way but we have been married 10 yrs now and been together 16. I did have a few relationship while he was gone but I love him and its good. It will never be the same again tho

Be it in any form cheating hurts, be it with a partner, online partner or long distance partner. I have not cheated and I dont think I could ever cheat.

Once cheating takes place and is found out, a relationship on any level is never really the same.

 

[MercyMia]

I cheated at wist one time, but my wife was my partner so it did not really matter.

Mwah ha ha!

(I just spewed melted chocolate truffles all over my monitor. Thanks a lot!)

Edited to add:

Monitor's been cleaned off...and now I can post more seriously.

Cheating often seems a way of life among Filipino men, especially once they hit their 30s. As a child, I was very aware of cheating. It was one of those open secrets. It was going on, everyone knew who was cheating with who, but no rectifications or reconciliations were made. Those open secrets wounded me--very sharp edges. Consequently, in my own relationship, I've been vigilant, both reactively and proactively. Who was it ahead of me that said she has flashbacks of pain even years after the cheating ended? I hear you, lady.

I think that before a couple gets into a serious relationship, whether a marriage or living together, that they need to discuss their definitions of monogamy and what they will consider to be cheating. They don't need to draw up strict rules or procedures, but just be open, and realize that as time passes and their circumstances change, that they too will evolve, and that they need to be prepared for the long adventure ahead of them. For me, getting married meant taking the journey TOGETHER, discussing options and opportunities that come up along the way.

 

[Tooch McGroin]

I was involved with a woman whom I suspected, if tempted, could not be loyal to me. So I laid a little trap for her. I told her: should she ever feel the desire to cheat on me, she must tell me, so that we can have the chance to work things out. But above all: should she spontaneously cheat on me, she must come clean and confess it immediately afterward. I emphasized that my concern was one of hygiene. I promised that if she followed this one rule of mine, I would be okay. Her eyes grew wide and she said, "Really? So you'd be okay?" I assured her: yes, I'd be okay.

Then one day she came home with a guilty look on her face. I asked her what was wrong. She immediately confessed that she had just cheated on me with a business associate.

I calmly said, "I sincerely appreciate that you have kept your promise to me. Thank you."

She said, "So everything is okay?"

I replied, "No. I am leaving you."

She burst into tears. "But you said you would be okay!!!"

I replied: "Yes, I am okay. I am not a cheater. However, YOU are NOT okay. You are a cheater. And now I am free of you. Goodbye."

 

[Cheyenne]

Without too much detail, my ex husband had an affair with a colleague of ours. Our 8 year old (at the time) daughter walked in on them in bed together. Needless to say, we are divorced now. I am much happier without him, and never EVER see myself getting married ever again. He proved to me that marriage is just a piece of paper and isn't worth shit. I will never be in a monogamous relationship again....I won't let myself trust anyone like that ever again. I have my Baby in Boston who I love dearly and I have a couple of people a little closer to home when I feel like having fun. I'm happy and plan to stay this way.

You sound more bitter against marriage than you sound happy. JMHO.

 

[MWG]

You sound more bitter against marriage than you sound happy. JMHO.

Good observation. Very good, in fact.

 

[Ladybird]

Without too much detail, my ex husband had an affair with a colleague of ours. Our 8 year old (at the time) daughter walked in on them in bed together. Needless to say, we are divorced now. I am much happier without him, and never EVER see myself getting married ever again. He proved to me that marriage is just a piece of paper and isn't worth shit. I will never be in a monogamous relationship again....I won't let myself trust anyone like that ever again. I have my Baby in Boston who I love dearly and I have a couple of people a little closer to home when I feel like having fun. I'm happy and plan to stay this way.

Something similar happened to me, and I know how it feels. Like you I will never marry again. Nor will I let someone get that close to me again. I can't risk the pain and hurt, it was too great.

That's one of the spin offs with cheating. Relationships break down, and so many of us lose the ability to trust again.