spacekowboy
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This has got to be some sort of brit slang.
The Isolated Blurt Thread XXX: Well Endowed Cock Sleeves
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This has got to be some sort of brit slang.
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trysail
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Jeeeeeeeeezzzzzzuuuuuuzzzzzzzzz H. Fucking KEEEEEEEEEEEERIIIIIIIIIST
...and here I thought I was dealing with civilised people.
Fata Morgana
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Well here in Britain it is tradition to throw slugs at weddings, not confetti. It's you yanks who are uncivilised.
Saint Peter
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...do you, Des, take this extremely fuckable piece of yummy ass, to be yours...
Fata Morgana
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I had a meeting today with a rather heavy man. He was picking at his teeth while I was talking. I obviously found something tasty in there because he dislodged it, chewed on it a bit more, and swallowed.
....
trysail
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It's not Britspeak. She's serious.
A slug is a slug.
Where's the goddamned salt ??
Ima pour a whole cup of salt on that thing.
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Saint Peter
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Fata Morgana
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Saint Peter
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Oh. I assumed you were snogging his face off.
I am going to put my head in the oven.
You all have a nice night.
Fata Morgana
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It's no good trying to educate these cunts Des. They probably think marmalade is having sex with their mother.
Fata Morgana
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I'm picturing you snogging the face off a heavy set fella then doing a Stew's AV! It's making me ever so happy.
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trysail
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Well here in Britain it is tradition to throw slugs at weddings, not confetti. It's you yanks who are uncivilised.
I suspected as much. It's now obvious that I'm dealing with a representative of a society and culture that could easily be confused with that of Zambia.
Even the infamous Phil sounds more civilised after this admission on Fata's part.
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There is nothing lower than a garden slug.
Jennifer
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doctor_insanus
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girlsmiley
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Dan & Little Ann.
Well. I sat down with my plate of buffet food, it had been raining all day and we were outside. I dropped a bit of my Bombay potato but couldn't find it. Later when we were pissed up and yammering on I had my hand down the side of my thigh and thought I felt the wayward piece of spud. I picked it up to put on my plate and saw it was a fucking slug, screamed like a banshee and threw it up in the air. Guests were alarmed and gave me the dead eye and I felt sick for 35 minutes. Kept feeling it on my hand all night.
Reminds me of the time a cockroach crawled into my hair at dinner.
When I was young I had very long, beautiful hair. I'd had a bath and was sitting at the the table in my pyjamas with my family having dinner. I could feel something tickling my neck, but then it stopped and I was all good. But then it started to wriggle again. I could feel something climbing in my hair. Tugging on my hair like a fish on a line. Climbing up to the nape of my neck. I froze. I'm surprised I didn't pee myself. I reached into my hair and grabbed this thing with my thumb and index finger and I squeezed. I squueeeezed. I squeezed the shit out of it and threw it on the table. It was dead.
Fata Morgana
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trysail
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...Well. I sat down with my plate of buffet food, it had been raining all day and we were outside. I dropped a bit of my Bombay potato but couldn't find it. Later when we were pissed up and yammering on I had my hand down the side of my thigh and thought I felt the wayward piece of spud. I picked it up to put on my plate and saw it was a fucking slug, screamed like a banshee and threw it up in the air. Guests were alarmed and gave me the dead eye and I felt sick for 35 minutes. Kept feeling it on my hand all night.
An incredible social faux pas.
They've been talking about you ever since.
girlsmiley
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Jesus fucking Christ. Why must such evil exist in the world?
I don't know.
What I do know is that it's really hard being a little girl sometimes.
Did I tell you about the doll I got for Christmas? Again, I was at the table. I fed my little baby a bottle and she pissed on my nightie. My family laughed and laughed and I threw her on the floor and cried. And then my sister ate all the little doll food crystals.
Saint Peter
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I don't know.
What I do know is that it's really hard being a little girl sometimes.
Did I tell you about the doll I got for Christmas? Again, I was at the table. I fed my little baby a bottle and she pissed on my nightie. My family laughed and laughed and I threw her on the floor and cried. And then my sister ate all the little doll food crystals.
*reported*
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