Clerihew Corner

Hornblende

Exploring eloquence
Joined
Oct 14, 2015
Posts
19,195
What is a Clerihew, I hear you ask. Most of you. Well, some of you. The ones who like wordplay, at least. That makes at least four of us, right?

It's a four line humorous poem, invented by Edmund Clerihew Bentley. It has a rhyming scheme of AABB. The first line is someone's name, the general intent being to poke gentle fun at that person. It has no metre, and scanning is unimportant, so each line can be as long or short as you desire. Most of all, it is meant to be light-hearted. Here are a few classic examples, the first two of which were written by Bentley himself:


Sir Humphry Davy
Detested gravy.
He lived in the odium
Of having discovered Sodium.

Sir Christopher Wren
Said, "I'm going to dine with some men.
If anyone calls,
Say I'm designing St. Paul's."

Elizabeth Taylor
Never married a sailor
Or anyone who'd been governor of Texas.
And that's about all the exclusions on the list of her exes.

Did Descartes
Depart
With the thought
"Therefore I'm not"?

So now it's our turn. Here are three to be going on with:


MakeMeWet
Lives with one constant source of regret
Because CJOnTheRocks
Refuses to remove his socks

SuckonSimon
Is always ready to say "Hi man!"
Except (amongst other things)
When he is busy polishing his cock rings.

WildHoney
Finds it terribly yummy
When British lovers
Join her under the covers
 
Walking_Eagle's a fella
who needs no umbrella
he just strips down
and hangs around

OxfordDon
Has often gone
but his return
is seldom spurned
 
LizVegas
Gives great sex ovations
And Causes great cum
When she is done.
 
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Hornblende is a genial fella
Sharp as a whip, and twice as clever
But Numeniusa has brains - maybe more
Together they never could be a bore

The patterns remind me of the tribal chants in the Jean M Auel book The Mammoth Hunters.
 
Amalgamation
Back from that Mexican nation
One dildo each
He brought us from the beach
 
Barefootgirl
Has her mind in a whirl
But uses her powers
To lure men into showers. :D
 
Hornblende
Brings pleasure to Numi's rear end
Then he comes into lit
To relax for a bit
 
The Multiverse keeps Amalgamation
From enervation
But in at least one alternate universe
He likes to dress up as a nurse. :D
 
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This is a cool thread, I'll see if I can come up with one...
 
Greeneyedvirgin
She's never wrestled a sturgeon
But in some way that's quite bizarre
She looks just like a porn star!
 
Ydahecnot
He's hot
Be sure to use sunscreen
Lest he get too obscene
 
Numi
Is oh so yummy
Her sexual appetite
Puts HB to sleep every night
 
CJ
Is so sexy
Even when he's eating Tex-Mexi
He's never too messy
But not dressy dressy

Lol
 
These are all great - thank you poetic Litsters!

LizzieEr
Her fans concur
Takes photos artistic
Which send our imaginations ballistic :devil:
 
Dear Hornblende
With that lovely rear end
All the thing we'd do
Maybe Numi joins too?
:devil:
 
The lady Penuche
Makes OD's cock go kersploosh!
Whilst brandishing a tissue
To catch the resultant issue!
 
Lizzie
Send the guys in a tizzy
Make me wanna go south
Have her riding my mouth.
 
Oxford Don
Seduces with song
Uses guitarist tunes
To make women swoon
 
Amalgamation
Is quite the sensation
And his erudite banter
Brings all the ladies to him at a canter!
 
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