There is no such thing as a sub and dom.

[simpletimes]

Think about it Sub/Domm Who has the power? The dom, or the sub that you dominate , who dominated. Understand who controls who.

 

[bjhass]

Think about it Sub/Domm Who has the power? The dom, or the sub that you dominate , who dominated. Understand who controls who.

Wow. I don't even know where to begin.

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/87/a2/f9/87a2f96dffd608b8cde6aea7284a372f.jpg

mind...blown

 

[bjhass]

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/87/a2/f9/87a2f96dffd608b8cde6aea7284a372f.jpg

mind...blown

Lol.

Purrrr-fect response!

 

[Deacon13]

Think about it Sub/Domm Who has the power? The dom, or the sub that you dominate , who dominated. Understand who controls who.

I've often stated this. Is it the Dom?
Is it the sub?
IMHO the sub is the one that gives the control
BUT it is the sub that controls what the Dom
controls, how long the control is allowed and to what degree.

So to answer the question, the Dom controls the sub.
The sub controls what and how much the Dom controls.
Does this help?

 

[DrThadius]

I've often stated this. Is it the Dom?
Is it the sub?
IMHO the sub is the one that gives the control
BUT it is the sub that controls what the Dom
controls, how long the control is allowed and to what degree.

So to answer the question, the Dom controls the sub.
The sub controls what and how much the Dom controls.
Does this help?

Very well put!

 

[base10]

Think about it Sub/Domm Who has the power? The dom, or the sub that you dominate , who dominated. Understand who controls who.

While in "character" the dom is in control of the sub.

But the decision by both parties to take over or relinquish control is a mutual decision, at will, that can be ended at any time by either party.

 

[emcwolf13]

While in "character" the dom is in control of the sub.

But the decision by both parties to take over or relinquish control is a mutual decision, at will, that can be ended at any time by either party.

Well put; it's a big deal (at least, to me) that the D/s decisions are still mutually made despite the power difference.

 

[base10]

Well put; it's a big deal (at least, to me) that the D/s decisions are still mutually made despite the power difference.

Thank you for the kind words.

It's a big deal to me as well that the power difference doesn't occur until it's agreed to occur.

My goal as a dom is not to take advantage of a sub, she is still my equal, even when she's handed the keys to me.

 

[clistenovena]

Think about it Sub/Domm Who has the power? The dom, or the sub that you dominate , who dominated. Understand who controls who.

It's a powerplay. How that dynamic works between Dominant and submissive is as unique as fingerprints.

 

[clistenovena]

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/87/a2/f9/87a2f96dffd608b8cde6aea7284a372f.jpg

mind...blown

Excellent.

 

[Aphro]

No answer. But not sure how this is a personal?

 

[RawHumor]

No answer. But not sure how this is a personal?

It's not. It's someone trying to bait people into flaming.

Please don't feed the trolls, people.

 

[base10]

It's not. It's someone trying to bait people into flaming.

Please don't feed the trolls, people.

Just because it's a pretty bullshit attempt at trying to bait people, it doesn't mean it's not an interesting question when interpreted by reasonable people.

 

[lilvixen2016]

Think about it Sub/Domm Who has the power? The dom, or the sub that you dominate , who dominated. Understand who controls who.

It is referred to as a power exchange, right?
I am sure there are many that will disagree with this statement:
“There is no such thing as a sub and dom.”


So what would you call it when two people decide on certain limits and then one surrenders the control to the other? As the trust grows so does the surrender of ones self to the other.

 

[bjhass]

It is referred to as a power exchange, right?
I am sure there are many that will disagree with this statement:
“There is no such thing as a sub and dom.”


So what would you call it when two people decide on certain limits and then one surrenders the control to the other? As the trust grows so does the surrender of ones self to the other.

I, for one, disagree with this statement: “There is no such thing as a sub and dom.”

simpletimes' assumption is that power exchange = control. I'm willing to concede that in many ways a sub can have power over a Dom/me but that does not equal control. A Dom/me must first control him/her self after giving up their own power. Only then can he/she truly control the power given to them by another.

 

[SpunThings]

It's not about control, it's about authority. Who is in charge?

 

[oOMinxOo]

I think it really depends on the person. I am submissive, however I am in complete control of every situation I am in. I know what dominant men like and I enjoy feeding that desire.

It puts me in a unique position to control the controller without their knowing they're being controlled.

 

[amofiga]

Age old question. There are those who would tell you the sub is always the top from below, but in truth, many people are basically switch to some level or another. I had a lady friend who always said being the best tops are those who know how to be good bottoms. Many at some point will have at least some experience both ways. Who's really in charge if they tell you that they want you to flog them and fuck them in the ass? Being the top doesn't necessarily mean that you are a dom. Basically all that matters is that there is mutual satisfaction.

 

[A_Muse_Kate]

An Opposing Viewpoint

One can possess power over his own self and frankly I insist that he do. For without full power over all in any BDSM moment, he cannot keep her safe and ultimately, that is what she entrusts him with.

Her submission is the gift he has earned, exuding his power, his protection, his passion.

If it is within her, the response is to relinquish control.

But not by her choice, but in response to the relinquishment of his soul, making him vulnerable, showing her his worth and desire, yearning for her to respond from within her own depths, as natural as the blink of an eye when sought out by a ray of sun.

I want many things of my submission…..power is not one of them…

 

[barefootgirl69]

One can possess power over his own self and frankly I insist that he do. For without full power over all in any BDSM moment, he cannot keep her safe and ultimately, that is what she entrusts him with.

Her submission is the gift he has earned, exuding his power, his protection, his passion.

If it is within her, the response is to relinquish control.

But not by her choice, but in response to the relinquishment of his soul, making him vulnerable, showing her his worth and desire, yearning for her to respond from within her own depths, as natural as the blink of an eye when sought out by a ray of sun.

I want many things of my submission…..power is not one of them…

I'm struggling with this...a gift he has EARNED.
How does one earn a gift?
I know when I give a gift, I do it because I love that person. I want to see them happy, I want to GIVE...whether they've earned it or not makes not difference.

How does a Dom earn it? Must he be a good boy?
Honestly, I think any relationship kind of flows together. You talk, you're attracted, his characteristic (DOM) naturally meshes with yours (sub)...you find that he's trustworthy and you just flow into the relationship where you can't help but submit to him because you are so drawn to him. Or is that just me?

 

[IrisAlthea]

I'm struggling with this...a gift he has EARNED.
How does one earn a gift?
I know when I give a gift, I do it because I love that person. I want to see them happy, I want to GIVE...whether they've earned it or not makes not difference.

How does a Dom earn it? Must he be a good boy?
Honestly, I think any relationship kind of flows together. You talk, you're attracted, his characteristic (DOM) naturally meshes with yours (sub)...you find that he's trustworthy and you just flow into the relationship where you can't help but submit to him because you are so drawn to him. Or is that just me?

No, not just you.