Prepare For First-Time Anal Strap-On

[newcouple1128]

Hey everyone - I've made a few posts, and some of you have responded with advice, but I think I should just make a general topic to get a more wider scope of opinions.

My wife and I have wanted to try strap-on play for a long time now. Every time we try I have to stop because of the pain, I'm obviously to tight. We have a thin butt plug that we use that I love cumming with. We use lots of lube, but for whatever reason it still is difficult for us to use a strap on.

I want to be able to ride her with pleasure, not pain. We have so many different dildos that she doesn't want to go out any buy anymore. What do you all recommend I do to make it so we can have an enjoyable strapon experience?

 

[boredhusband]

Hey there,..newly wed,...
My gf and I have found that straight out Vaseline,...is the BEST lube. She's only used a few toys on me,.... So far. But it seems that even some of the other lubes creates a very uncomfortable vacuum. And hurts like hell.
We've been talking a lot about a FeelDoe,..leave you heard of this? We just (yesterday) started a sub/dom texting thing. With ME being the Dom. It was an amazing 8 hours of playing,.lthat resulted in a conversation that we will try it this weekend. (We live two hours apart) ,...lol,.and I'm married. But,...we've fantasized about us both sucking a cock together,....etc. Haven't gotten to the strapon thing yet.

 

[newcouple1128]

Thanks for the response. I have heard of those before, but we have spent so much money on toys that I think she would be against buying even more. I want a realistic looking dildo so I can act out some of my urges but I also don't want to have a collection of 50 dildos. I'll have to read up on vaseline and see what feedback there is about it, might have to go get some.

 

[newcouple1128]

Looking to give this a shot tonight, anyone have any more advice for the wife and I?

 

[IdahoRandy]

Strap on

You and your wife are so hot. Is she helping you, or are you just doing this on your own. I haven't had a man yet, but years of bum play alone. You just have to bear down and get the head of the dildo past the sphincter. Then it feels good. I think you need to use a bigger but plug. One big enough that it is hard to get in or out. After wearing it for an hour or so, the strap on will go in easy. I wish I could play with both you.

 

[newcouple1128]

You and your wife are so hot. Is she helping you, or are you just doing this on your own. I haven't had a man yet, but years of bum play alone. You just have to bear down and get the head of the dildo past the sphincter. Then it feels good. I think you need to use a bigger but plug. One big enough that it is hard to get in or out. After wearing it for an hour or so, the strap on will go in easy. I wish I could play with both you.

Thanks, I think that might be part of the problem. Yesterday I tried a butt plug, and two different size dildos. The middle dildo got in and felt good once I let it sit there for a bit. The last dildo hurt trying to get the head in and I just couldn't take it and had to stop. I had so much lube on too, it was a mess.

 

[IdahoRandy]

Poppers

They say that sniffing poppers loosens up the sphincter. But maybe you should just stick to the smaller 6" dildo for a while. That is the size of me. I want to massage your prostate with my small cock.

 

[newcouple1128]

They say that sniffing poppers loosens up the sphincter. But maybe you should just stick to the smaller 6" dildo for a while. That is the size of me. I want to massage your prostate with my small cock.

The problem is, with her strapon the smaller dildo doesnt really stay on the harness. I just want her to be able to enjoy it and thrust without constantly having to hold onto it.

 

[KINKYCanada]

The problem is, with her strapon the smaller dildo doesnt really stay on the harness. I just want her to be able to enjoy it and thrust without constantly having to hold onto it.

Well there are a million harnesses out there! You might need to explore a different set up!

KC

 

[twister947]

1. Use what fits, not some fantasy cock.
2. Prep. This is no different than having the real deal. Take your time, and work up to the main event. If your sphincter is not relaxed, nothing will feel good.
3. I would really like to see some input from users re: harnesses. Clearly, some are better than others.

 

[PegMeKatePlease]

Tantus

Take a look at this package from Tantus. The harness is comfortable for her... the plugs start at just the right size for him...

It's a win win. Once you get comfortable with it, she can use the same harness and the both of you move up in size.

 

[FGB]

Trying something that vibrates should help.

 

[ADIDAS00]

Although we don't have a strapon, we do have a lifelike dildo that she has used on me. It's one of her big turn ons so I obviously went along with it. I admit that it's a turn on and I like anything kinky, but my wife loves playing with my backside. It's her thing

So what we did the first time was....
- used a skinnier lifelike dildo
- lots of lube
- I went in bed by myself and started ahead of time by easing it in and out. Not rushing it
- by the time she got in bed I was ready and she was excited
- I got on all fours and she eased it in and out while she talked me through it and urged me on. The dirty talk helps I think
- she also stroked me and enjoyed the massive amount of precum that the dildo made me produce

All in all, it was well worth trying out. Totally fun and a great experience to spice things up

 

[newcouple1128]

Although we don't have a strapon, we do have a lifelike dildo that she has used on me. It's one of her big turn ons so I obviously went along with it. I admit that it's a turn on and I like anything kinky, but my wife loves playing with my backside. It's her thing

So what we did the first time was....
- used a skinnier lifelike dildo
- lots of lube
- I went in bed by myself and started ahead of time by easing it in and out. Not rushing it
- by the time she got in bed I was ready and she was excited
- I got on all fours and she eased it in and out while she talked me through it and urged me on. The dirty talk helps I think
- she also stroked me and enjoyed the massive amount of precum that the dildo made me produce

All in all, it was well worth trying out. Totally fun and a great experience to spice things up

Sounds like really solid advice. I think the getting to bed early stage is what will help me out more.

To the person who mentioned the new harness.. thank you. I will also have to look into that. I think we actually almost purchased that one but for some reason decided against it. I'll have to see what the wife thinks about buying a new one.

 

[blowit]

Sounds like really solid advice. I think the getting to bed early stage is what will help me out more.

To the person who mentioned the new harness.. thank you. I will also have to look into that. I think we actually almost purchased that one but for some reason decided against it. I'll have to see what the wife thinks about buying a new one.

Feeldoe?

 

[newcouple1128]

Feeldoe?

Looked into it but they honestly look to big and I am worried about it staying inside her or not.

 

[Firebird11]

Although we don't have a strapon, we do have a lifelike dildo that she has used on me. It's one of her big turn ons so I obviously went along with it. I admit that it's a turn on and I like anything kinky, but my wife loves playing with my backside. It's her thing

So what we did the first time was....
- used a skinnier lifelike dildo
- lots of lube
- I went in bed by myself and started ahead of time by easing it in and out. Not rushing it
- by the time she got in bed I was ready and she was excited
- I got on all fours and she eased it in and out while she talked me through it and urged me on. The dirty talk helps I think
- she also stroked me and enjoyed the massive amount of precum that the dildo made me produce

All in all, it was well worth trying out. Totally fun and a great experience to spice things up

I am in this exact same place. My wife is fearful of hurting me so she rather me do the initial insertion. Once in and ready she will take over. She is getting better and better at fucking me with the dildo. I want to move to a strapon soon.

 

[newcouple1128]

I am in this exact same place. My wife is fearful of hurting me so she rather me do the initial insertion. Once in and ready she will take over. She is getting better and better at fucking me with the dildo. I want to move to a strapon soon.

Any update, have you all moved to a bigger size? I have been so busy haven't been able to try.

 

[lowcollar]

Use some fingers first and go slow. I can say for a certainty that the first time is going to hurt a good bit at first. Have her pull out, relax for a moment, let the pain subside and try again. After a couple times, it gets easier. After a little while, being pegged became one of my very favorite things to do. It does take time, months even years to take really large things.

 

[Mrs_and_mr]

Lube lube lube. The first time a strapon was used on me she used a lube injector and put plenty inside me then lubed up her cock with extra on the head then used the heads to lube up the outside of me. She easily pushed into me. After that we adjusted the amount we used.

 

[Goldenfinger]

Lots of lube, fingers and maybe a small butt plug at first. Go slow.

 

[Goldenfinger]

1. Use what fits, not some fantasy cock.
2. Prep. This is no different than having the real deal. Take your time, and work up to the main event. If your sphincter is not relaxed, nothing will feel good.
3. I would really like to see some input from users re: harnesses. Clearly, some are better than others.

Absolutely the harness is just as important as the strapon. Those g string looking harness might look sexy in a photo but they don’t work. My wife likes a harness that holds the strapon in place so it moves when she moves. If it doesn’t and has a lot of slack there’s little movement

 

[LMWM321]

I suggest switching from a dildo to a Pegging phallus.

When my wife pegs me, it's with her VERY lifelike dildo - in shape, texture, and size, which is just under 6" long and just under 5" of girth. ..I can take the size without problem, but sometimes the molded glans and veins can be irritating - they scrape on the way in and out. So we're going to buy a smooth pegging phallus - made of plastic or glass. I suggest that you consider doing the same. My wife does prefer the look of a penis, but if this makes it easier then we'll do it more often... which is a win for both of us.

As for prep, I suggest you begin by getting in the shower with some lube. Push your own heavily lubed finger in then out...then two fingers, maybe three if you can... Do it for a few minutes - in, then out. ..Then head to bed and use a butt plug on yourself, a small one first, then one with a girth that is the same as the dildo. ..Stick in, then out, in, then out... This may sound like a lot of time and effort - it isn't. ..It takes less than 10 minutes. After that, taking a dildo should be pretty easy. And start very slow. When we start, my wife pushes in until the first hint of discomfort, then stops as the muscles stretch. In just a few seconds, I'm ready for another "push". In less than 2 minutes, my wife is gliding the whole dildo in and out of my ass with abandon, Which is beyond awesome. .

Seriously, I feel very sorry for guys who are too insecure about their sexuality to enjoy being pegged. Having your partner reaching deep inside of you in this way is almost a religious experience

 

[Lucien_Al]

My routine is to clean well, lots of lube then an Aneros Helix for a short while. I then use a few plugs slowly going up to the next bigger one. Next she uses a glass cock shaped dildo on me and I find that if she is controlling it by hand initially she is able to see my expressions and see where it is either good of painful and adjust accordingly until I am accustomed to the size. For me personally the smoothness of the glass is the best as the lube tends to be more effective.

I have been able to use a 7 inch but so far the 8inch is a bridge too far.

 

[Vivian251]

Hey, the Inhapx158 could be a good fit—beginner-friendly and smooth. Keep up with lube, warm up with your plug, and take it slow. You got this!