Another newbie

[Desiretobedesir]

Hello everyone,

My very first erotic story was published on here today. I'd love to get some more feedback so that I can get better. Thank you!

My background is as a newspaper writer, this is my first go at erotica.

 

[james4fun3480]

Hello everyone,

My very first erotic story was published on here today. I'd love to get some more feedback so that I can get better. Thank you!

My background is as a newspaper writer, this is my first go at erotica.

Desire you did a good job

 

[JonathanBair]

Awesome job!!! Can you post the link, so we all can read it?

 

[NaokoSmith]

Awesome job!!! Can you post the link, so we all can read it?

Dd put the link in her signature, Jonathan .

Nice work, a hot man on a bike surely is a wonderful thing to behold

 

[jsmiam]

Hello everyone,

My very first erotic story was published on here today. I'd love to get some more feedback so that I can get better. Thank you!

My background is as a newspaper writer, this is my first go at erotica.

Yes, good job. Cynics like me say making the story 2 Lit pages long is worth another .15 points, because the people who don't really care much either way won't bother navigating to page 2, whereas if it's only 1 page, they'll toss out a careless score, sometimes lower.

Also, your post over in Author's Hangout turned into a story feedback thread, when you really hadn't asked for it over there. The fact that people had to find relatively minor things to discuss also says you did well. Keep writing!

 

[NOIRTRASH]

I suggest this:

Collect 10-12 short stories you really really really like. Then contrast and compare them for their respective characteristics: Wordcount, pages, sentence length, paragraph length, sentence tags, etc. Pay attention to how the story starts. Pay attention to how it ends.

George V.Higgins said the best way to learn to write well is to read the best writing aloud. True.

While its wise to use all the words a story needs, its also helpful to make a story fit inside the space you have. Space forces a writer to get rid of excess. A good word often replaces several ho-hum ones.

 

[Desiretobedesir]

Thank you all for the feedback, it's appreciated!