True Story

[jezzilee]

https://41.media.tumblr.com/0096988f512eff613eab4141b4a9c13d/tumblr_n17zhsieoD1rxq5upo1_500.jpg

I tend to see the good in everyone. I think most people have at least one good point.

Do you give people a chance? Do you look past the bad and find the good or do you let a first impression tell you everything?

 

[Colonel Hogan]

There probably is some good in everyone, but for a true sociopath, the distinction is pretty academic. I also don't give a lot of humanitarian points for terrorists who believe they are acting on behalf of God, nor do I give a shit that they are human enough to perhaps love their own children.

I think MOST people have far more than one good point.

I almost always give people many chances. I may return rudeness for rudeness in an instant, but that does not form my future relationship with them.

I never let a first impression tell me anything other than how people contribute to the first impressions they are likely to give.

 

[bronzeage]

I tend to see the good in everyone. I think most people have at least one good point.

Do you give people a chance? Do you look past the bad and find the good or do you let a first impression tell you everything?

I'll give them 10 posts to make their point.

Unless it's busybody.

 

[jezzilee]

There probably is some good in everyone, but for a true sociopath, the distinction is pretty academic. I also don't give a lot of humanitarian points for terrorists who believe they are acting on behalf of God, nor do I give a shit that they are human enough to perhaps love their own children.

I think MOST people have far more than one good point.

I almost always give people many chances. I may return rudeness for rudeness in an instant, but that does not form my future relationship with them.

I never let a first impression tell me anything other than how people contribute to the first impressions they are likely to give.

You have a great point on the terrorist thing. I don't think I even want to try to find good in someone like that. I like the way you think on this subject. I have friends who are enemies it doesn't affect my friendship with them, we just do not discuss those things. I think that everyone should be given a chance.

 

[jezzilee]

I'll give them 10 posts to make their point.

Unless it's busybody.

After ten posts is it off the land of ignore?

 

[Wrong Element]

I tend to see the good in everyone. I think most people have at least one good point.

Do you give people a chance? Do you look past the bad and find the good or do you let a first impression tell you everything?

I find that my positive first impressions are usually well founded, but my negative first impressions are often premature. Especially at Lit; I've ended up friendly with several people where my sense of them based on their early posts was "ugh."

But Bronze is right about busybody.

 

[Colonel Hogan]

You have a great point on the terrorist thing. I don't think I even want to try to find good in someone like that. I like the way you think on this subject. I have friends who are enemies it doesn't affect my friendship with them, we just do not discuss those things. I think that everyone should be given a chance.

I don't have friends who are "enemies," but I do have friends that have blind spots that I can't get my head around given all that is otherwise so wonderful about them.

Hell, for that matter I've got blind spots I can't get my own head around despite all the otherwise wonderful things about me.

 

[bronzeage]

After ten posts is it off the land of ignore?

Life is much too short to spent more time than that.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[Recidiva]

I think I take after my dad, who was a brutal and sharp judge of character and saw good and bad in people, but who encouraged the good at all times and was kind. He was an amazing example of brilliant intuition and deduction of character, who allowed himself to be underestimated and possibly many people thought he was maybe just a little bit slow. If you weren't watching his eyes, maybe you'd believe it.

I saw that he was so nice and angled it just so...and even mean people just didn't want to disappoint him, wanted to live up to his expectations. He created good behavior in people through not accepting anything else, insisting on his reality with wit and an 'aw shucks' demeanor.

I remember when my dad met an unapologetic racist (a family member) and I was ready to cringe, but my dad just barreled through.

The man said "And you can see that all the Puerto Ricans are just taking over the government"

My dad said with a huge grin "And it's it just about time that happened!" with enthusiasm, shocking this guy into stopping, staring, and thinking...he can't be that dumb...

My dad was not dumb, but not another racist word came out of the guy's mouth for the rest of the night.

So for fearless disarming full in the face of people intending to offend...nobody beat my dad, and I try to take after him, but I don't have the wit or the grace, just the ambition.

 

[jezzilee]

I find that my positive first impressions are usually well founded, but my negative first impressions are often premature. Especially at Lit; I've ended up friendly with several people where my sense of them based on their early posts was "ugh."

But Bronze is right about busybody.

I read this and I think that it happens often. If we are talking just of experiences on Literotica, I know that things can be taken out of context. Written word does not come with the inflections and nuances of the orally spoken word. It is easy to misconstrue anothers words. It is also easy to come into a conversation and read something that has been posted without knowledge of the backstory and I think this is also where misconceptions can come into play. There is a lot of history on lit. There are many long time friendships that have stood the test of lit time. I don't blame long time members for being suspicious of new people because of the alt situation. I think that is where some snap judgements come into play.

 

[jezzilee]

I don't have friends who are "enemies," but I do have friends that have blind spots that I can't get my head around given all that is otherwise so wonderful about them.

Hell, for that matter I've got blind spots I can't get my own head around despite all the otherwise wonderful things about me.

That's what mirrors are for

Life is much too short to spent more time than that.

I am glad I surpassed the ten post iggy mark! Sometimes i wish I would use the ignore feature.

This subject ( terrorism) formed part of a discussion with my yoga teacher last week. It was a blind spot for me til he told me how he COULD feel for how young boys got sucked into this , and his route to his 'understanding' , and it could see his route to this point more clearly and grudgingly with some acceptance.

I have lots of friends / close acquaintances I disagree with on points, often points we hold very dear. Its good! We either discuss with reason and respect or tease each other gently. One of my dearest friends is very politically different from me. We temper each other sometimes, and delight that we can chat about it with no resentment. She even doesn't like pets but tolerates mine....even if she still doesn't know their names

Tolerance is not found in everyone. It is a quality I wish more people had. The world would be a better place for sure!

I think I take after my dad, who was a brutal and sharp judge of character and saw good and bad in people, but who encouraged the good at all times and was kind. He was an amazing example of brilliant intuition and deduction of character, who allowed himself to be underestimated and possibly many people thought he was maybe just a little bit slow. If you weren't watching his eyes, maybe you'd believe it.

I saw that he was so nice and angled it just so...and even mean people just didn't want to disappoint him, wanted to live up to his expectations. He created good behavior in people through not accepting anything else, insisting on his reality with wit and an 'aw shucks' demeanor.

I remember when my dad met an unapologetic racist (a family member) and I was ready to cringe, but my dad just barreled through.

The man said "And you can see that all the Puerto Ricans are just taking over the government"

My dad said with a huge grin "And it's it just about time that happened!" with enthusiasm, shocking this guy into stopping, staring, and thinking...he can't be that dumb...

My dad was not dumb, but not another racist word came out of the guy's mouth for the rest of the night.

So for fearless disarming full in the face of people intending to offend...nobody beat my dad, and I try to take after him, but I don't have the wit or the grace, just the ambition.

It sounds like your dad had a great way of making people think, or showing them the error of their ways without embarrassing them or becoming confrontational. To me that sounds like a good thing.