The Absurd Thread

No crazier than a lady t-Rex with a cow and the pillsbury dough boy posting on lit. Not mentioning names.






noor
 
"Donald Trump Refuses to Say Whether He Thinks President Obama Was Born in US," ABC News - 11 hours ago
 
No crazier than a lady t-Rex with a cow and the pillsbury dough boy posting on lit. Not mentioning names.


noor

Do I still have that picture up?

Not admitting anything but Moo is a robotic hamster, not a cow.
Also the dough boy was just visiting and made no posts, Mr. Bear makes posts.:D

and which dodo made me a T-rex?
 
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Do I still have that picture up?

Not admitting anything but Moo is a robotic hamster, not a cow.
Also the dough boy was just visiting and made no posts, Mr. Bear makes posts.:D

and which dodo made me a T-rex?

The Cow is a robotic hamster? I'm confused. The dough boy needs an account too.:)

That would be me.:heart:
 
Copyright Oggbashan August 2004
...



The two lesbian spiders are perched on the picture rail in Og’s bedsitting room, resting after a frantic session of leg tangling.

“Ariadne?”

“Yes, Arachne?”

“I’m bored. Nothing happens here. Og sits for hours at his computer and ignores me when I scamper across his keyboard trying to communicate.”

“At least he didn’t squash you, Adne. He could have done.”

“He gave me a headache, Achne, banging his keyboard. I was tumbled about inside with all the fluff and coffee spills.”

“Anything interesting in there?”

“There was this tiny fly. Barely a taste. The rest was just rubbish. He ought to clean his keyboard more often.”

“Don’t say that, Adne. If he started cleaning he might suck us up into a vacuum cleaner. Who knows where we’d go? This is a nice place to be. There are enough insects to feed us and we have no worries…”

“Except that I’d like babies, Achne. I’m three months old. I’m getting past my best. We’ve got each other but…”

“We’ll find a male spider for you soon. Between us we could entangle him in our webs, wrap him in silk, you could ride him and then…”

“Lunch!” They shout together.

The door opens. The spiders duck back out of sight.

Og strides across the room and picks up the telephone, pressing a speed dial code.

“Lisa?”

Only Og’s side of the conversation is heard.

“You haven’t forgotten the dress rehearsal tonight? Shall I pick you up at seven thirty?

“OK. We’ll get a takeaway and then where?”

“Here? You’re sure? I’d be delighted. See you at seven thirty.”

Og puts the phone down and executes a stately pavane across the floor. He pulls out a suitcase from under the bed and extracts his Henry VIII costume, hanging it on a hook so that the creases drop out. He turns on the computer and logs into Literotica’s Author’s Hangout for an exchange of posts.

The spiders creep back to peer over the picture rail. They whisper to each other.

“Boring, isn’t it, Adne?”

“Yes. He spends hours like that. If he isn’t posting he’s writing stories. I like some of them but others, Ugh!”

“I think some of them are good, Adne.”

“You would. You have odd tastes sometimes. What you do with your legs sometimes shocks me. You seem to have no idea of what decent spiders should and shouldn’t do.”

“You enjoy it, Adne. Or at least you say you do.”

“Some of it is nice, Achne, but where you put your third and fourth legs… If anyone else knew, we’d be outcasts from arachnid society.”

“Don’t tell me – ‘Your mother wouldn’t like it’. She did, you know. She was a real goer in her time. A month ago you were ashamed of her. Last week you said you admired her unconventional behaviour. I admit I was shocked when she let that garden spider mount her. He was SO big.”

“She ate him, though, didn’t she? Just like all the other males.”

“She did eat him but it took her a week.”

“My mother is a game old bird, Achne. She’s over six months old now and still producing babies by the hundred.”

“Look, Adne. He’s logged off and is going to change.”

“Gross, isn’t it? He’s enormous. He’s much bigger than any of the human females we see. How they could eat him I don’t know.”

“I don’t think human females eat their males, Adne. Some of Og’s stories refer to males eating females…”

“Don’t make me vomit, Achne. The idea!”

“I don’t think he means ‘eating’ as we mean it. Perhaps we’ll see what happens tonight. It sounds as if Lisa is coming here.”

“He’s going, Achne. Time for us to explore and see what we can find to eat.”

“He’ll be gone for hours, Adne. We’ve got time for some more legging first.”

“Ooo-eer! Where did that leg come from? Oh, Achne…”

The two entwined spiders slip back out of sight.
 
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Let's hope Fata doesn't read that, she'll lose her mind. I'm sure the thought of spiders watching her would be too much to handle.:)
 
The wilder that I let the back yard grow, the more I notice new kinds of spiders.

Today I saw a micro Daddy Long Legs, on a potted calendula.

I am entertaining the absurd thought that the spiders have conversations about which spiders move into which part of the house, when the weather turns too cold for comfort.
 
The Cow is a robotic hamster? I'm confused. The dough boy needs an account too.:)

That would be me.:heart:

This is an old profile from before Moo left the farm for the BIG city but the likeness is quite good.

Moo is the only one with a Lit account, but he lets Mr. Bear post on it.
They don't know if the dough boy has an account and he hasn't visited since we moved so they can't ask him. He is probably a silly anti-grain alt or something.
 
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