It Was Love At First Sight

[Queersetti]

The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain, he fell madly in love with him.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Red or white?

 

[Queersetti]

The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likeable. In three days no one could stand him.

 

[Queersetti]

Where are the Snowdens of yesteryear?

 

[Mr Noone]

I imagine taking snaps still.

Bet Mrs Windsor is glad for life peerages now.

 

[Queersetti]

There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one's own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane, he had to fly them. If he flew them, he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to, he was sane and had to. Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch-22 and let out a respectful whistle.

"That's some catch, that Catch-22," he observed.

"It's the best there is," Doc Daneeka agreed.

 

[Queersetti]

"Anything worth living for," said Nately, "is worth dying for."

"And everything worth dying for," answered the sacrilegious old man, "is certainly worth living for."

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Coke or meth?

 

[Queersetti]

Coke or meth?

Read a book sometime.

 

[Queersetti]

"Hasn't it ever occured to you that in your promiscuous pursuit of women you are merely trying to assuage your subconscious fears of sexual impotence?"

"Yes, sir, it has."

"Then why do you do it?"

"To assuage my fears of sexual impotence."

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Read a book sometime.

Red Bull or Monster?

 

[marshalt]

Red or white?

Racist.

 

[Queersetti]

It was miraculous. It was almost no trick at all, he saw, to turn vice into virtue and slander into truth, impotence into abstinence, arrogance into humility, plunder into philanthropy, thievery into honor, blasphemy into wisdom, brutality into patriotism, and sadism into justice. Anybody could do it; it required no brains at all. It merely required no character.

 

[Queersetti]

Morale was deteriorating and it was all Yossarian's fault. The country was in peril; he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them.

 

[thør]

http://userscontent2.emaze.com/images/8d13901a-9b4d-4f84-a259-ebd736486835/b9e68a83-c0e8-4c74-9419-dd835bbf4f11.jpg

 

[Queersetti]

The knife came down, missing him by inches, and he took off.

 

[thør]

Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Racist.

I'm the bombardier.

 

[Queersetti]

They're trying to kill me," Yossarian told him calmly.

"No one's trying to kill you," Clevinger cried.

"Then why are they shooting at me?" Yossarian asked.

"They're shooting at everyone," Clevinger answered. "They're trying to kill everyone."

"And what difference does that make?

 

[Killswitch1]

We have a yosarian-kat.

How was your trip?

 

[Queersetti]

http://userscontent2.emaze.com/images/8d13901a-9b4d-4f84-a259-ebd736486835/b9e68a83-c0e8-4c74-9419-dd835bbf4f11.jpg

Had the naked man in the tree at Snowden's funeral been merely a hallucination? Or had it been a true revelation?

 

[Pookie]

That men would die was a matter of necessity; which men would die, though, was a matter of circumstance, and Yossarian was willing to be the victim of anything but circumstance. But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents.

 

[thør]

Major Major had lied, and it was good. He was not really surprised that it was good, for he had observed that people who did lie were, on the whole, more resourceful and ambitious and successful than people who did not lie.

 

[thør]

His heart cracked, and he fell in love. He wondered if she would marry him.

“Tu sei pazzo,” she told him with a pleasant laugh.

“Why am I crazy?” he asked.

“Perché non posso sposare.”

“Why can’t you get married?”

“Because I am not a virgin,” she answered.

“What has that got to do with it?”

“Who will marry me? No one wants a girl who is not a virgin.”

“I will. I’ll marry you.”

“Ma non posso sposarti.”

“Why can’t you marry me?”

“Perché sei pazzo.”

“Why am I crazy?”

“Perché vuoi sposarmi.”

Yossarian wrinkled his forehead with quizzical amusement. “You won’t marry me because I’m crazy, and you say I’m crazy because I want to marry you? Is that right?”

“Si.”

“Tu sei pazz’!” he told her loudly.

“Perché?” she shouted back at him indignantly, her unavoidable round breasts rising and falling in a saucy huff beneath the pink chemise as she sat up in bed indignantly. “Why am I crazy?”

“Because you won’t marry me.”

“Stupido!” she shouted back at him, and smacked him loudly and flamboyantly on the chest with the back of her hand. “Non posso sposarti! Non capisci? Non posso sposarti.”

“Oh, sure, I understand. And why can’t you marry me?”

“Perché sei pazzo!”

“And why am I crazy?”

“Perché vuoi sposarmi.”

“Because I want to marry you. Carina, ti amo,” he explained, and he drew her gently back down to the pillow. “Ti amo molto.”

“Tu sei pazzo,” she murmured in reply, flattered.

“Perché?”

“Because you say you love me. How can you love a girl who is not a virgin?”

“Because I can’t marry you.”

She bolted right up again in a threatening rage. “Why can’t you marry me?” she demanded, ready to clout him again if he gave an uncomplimentary reply. “Just because I am not a virgin?”

“No, no, darling. Because you’re crazy.”

 

[Queersetti]

The chaplain was apologetic. "I'm sorry, sir, but just about all the prayers I know are rather somber in tone and make at least some passing reference to God."