Feats of strength and courage.

[DesEsseintes]

I just straightened out a paperclip with my bare hands.

What have you ever done in your miserable lives to compare with that?

 

[Aglaopheme]

Did you just mention hero worship?

 

[Lord Pmann]

I masturbated at church.

 

[Lancecastor]

I fashioned a paint can hanger out of a wire clothes hanger just yesterday.

 

[DesEsseintes]

This thread is already worthy of being placed on the next deep space mission, as a warning to any aliens with big ideas.

 

[doowdniw]

I fashioned an implement (read hook) out of a hair pin in order to unwedge and retrieve a chip of porcelain from the dishwasher filter yesterday.

 

[JohnnySavage]

I'm afraid I can't participate in this thread. For the past decade I have been remodeling the Savage Manse. What's taken me a decade to do, a real man could have done in several weekends.

 

[hashtag45]

I masturbated at church.

Try a gr. orthodox church (they don't have chairs)
You'll get closer to the real thing

 

[Lord Pmann]

Try a gr. orthodox church (they don't have chairs)
You'll get closer to the real thing

Was it really necessary to abbreviate Greek with Gr?

 

[DesEsseintes]

Was it really necessary to abbreviate Greek with Gr?

I am not sure anything about hashtag's brief Lit career could be described as necessary.

 

[hashtag45]

I am not sure anything about hashtag's brief Lit career could be described as necessary.

lghtn. up, bro! (was kddng.)

 

[DesEsseintes]

lghtn. up, bro! (was kddng.)

You forgot to add (...)edited by hssh345

 

[Laurel]

Ate spaghetti with a spoon and fork twirling all proper-like and didn't get sauce all over my shirt. Once.

Though that's really a feat of dexterity, not strength or courage.

Hmm. That's all I got.

 

[Jennifer]

I once used a wire hanger to retrieve a snack item stuck in a vending machine. I ended getting 2 other items as well.

I realized life would never be that good again.

 

[Fata Morgana]

I once snapped someone's cock off during a handjob.

 

[DesEsseintes]

Ate spaghetti with a spoon and fork twirling all proper-like and didn't get sauce all over my shirt. Once.

Though that's really a feat of dexterity, not strength or courage.

Hmm. That's all I got.

I'm impressed. I bet that took years and years and years of dedicated practice.

 

[DesEsseintes]

I once used a wire hanger to retrieve a snack item stuck in a vending machine. I ended getting 2 other items as well.

I realized life would never be that good again.

Lots of women peak too soon, but not usually before they meet me.

</bronzeage>

 

[Laurel]

I once snapped someone's cock off during a handjob.

This doesn't surprise me as much as it probably should.

 

[Laurel]

I got one!!!

This weekend I opened a new jar of salsa with only my bare hands - without using the jar-gripper-thingy in the silverware drawer OR making Manu open it for me.

http://media.giphy.com/media/iVE5rO8LqZzLW/giphy.gif

 

[Laurel]

I'm impressed. I bet that took years and years and years of dedicated practice.

Pretty much.

 

[pollynova]

I killed a spider all by myself and only caused $1500 worth of damage to my bathroom and only peed my pants twice.

 

[Brollyanna]

I got one!!!

This weekend I opened a new jar of salsa with only my bare hands - without using the jar-gripper-thingy in the silverware drawer OR making Manu open it for me.

http://media.giphy.com/media/iVE5rO8LqZzLW/giphy.gif

"Turn the jar upside down and give the bottom a good old slap." ~ Old bar-bitch proverb.

 

[oggbashan]

I had to ask my wife to open a plastic bottle of milk today.

The foil cap was stuck hard, the tab was missing, and I had cut my fingernails this morning.

She used a knife.

I think that was cheating...

 

[oggbashan]

"Turn the barmaid upside down and give the bottom a good old slap." ~ Old bar-bitch proverb.

Fixed your post.

 

[Brollyanna]

Fixed your post.

Good catch.