The official newbie introduction thread...

[GimpyIntellect]

Hello newbies!

Feel free to use this thread as a platform for your introduction to Literotica. Come in and tell us all about yourself.

If you're a female, take this opportunity to show us your tits.

If you're a male, take this opportunity to show your wife/girlfriend/mother's tits.

Welcome aboard and enjoy your stay.

 

[Skiddles2015]

Hello n00bs.

Fuck off to the playground and ignore the knob who started this thread.

 

[GimpyIntellect]

Someone needs a hug.

 

[Boxtoz]

I have many girlfriends. Which girl's tits should I show?

 

[Debbie]

Dear Newbies

We do have a suggestion box and a newsletter.

Laurel is our Leader. Please do not address Her in an overly friendly manner. She should be addressed as Your Majesty, She who is The Mother of all Cats or Oh Most Wonderful Leader of us all.

(She loves us all equally - even if some of us act like churlish dick heads)

This months suggestion being posed after being randomly picked from the suggestion box is :
"Can Manu please install a block poster option?"

So far the Literotica Committee is divided on this matter.

 

[GimpyIntellect]

I have many girlfriends. Which girl's tits should I show?

I'm not surprised you have an abundance of women at your disposal, Boxtoz. As soon as I saw you, I thought to myself - this guy is a stud.

The answer to your question is - "All of them".

 

[Queersetti]

Welcome aboard and enjoy your stay.

The average number of posts per member: 0.3

 

[Pookie]

The average number of posts per member: 0.3

Which roughly equates to the average percent of effort for each as well.

 

[GimpyIntellect]

The average number of posts per member: 0.3

Relax buddy.

They're about to show up in droves.

 

[thør]

Relax buddy.

They're about to show up in droves.

Best hire up some drovers.

 

[Riles]

Best hire up some drovers.

I'm booked into mid May.

 

[glynndah]

Dear newbies,

Please look in your welcome basket generously provided by the welcoming committee, for your coupons good for free unlimited capitalization and punctuation. This month's special is free lessons on how to avoid that dreaded solid wall of type {hint: use your ENTER key} which so often plagues the amateur poster.

Also of note, we are currently experiencing a dearth of apostrophes so please do not squander your quota unnecessarily.

Sincerely,
the good little witch.

 

[thør]

I'm booked into mid May.

Keep rollin', rollin', rollin'......

 

[bluebell]

[churlish dickhead stuff]

 

[AllyRose]

I's this' site a good site for me to post to cauese im new and i like stories about incest and my grandmother just got home from deploy'ment' i don't want ppl to be mean to me because i don't know how to use the search function and i heard that the authors h'an'gout is a bad place to go and incest along with how to help me find a story i was reading

 

[Que]

The average number of posts per member: 0.3

As a relatively new, fairly shy member I will endeavor to participate more in order to achieve that rarefied air.

 

[Jennifer]

I's this' site a good site for me to post to cauese im new and i like stories about incest and my grandmother just got home from deploy'ment' i don't want ppl to be mean to me because i don't know how to use the search function and i heard that the authors h'an'gout is a bad place to go and incest along with how to help me find a story i was reading

Happy Library Week

 

[AllyRose]

Happy Library Week

http://www.ala.org/conferencesevents/celebrationweeks/natlibraryweek

:3

 

[AllyRose]

Despite children practically being born with iPads in their hands, it's amazing how lost they get when they're asked to do research for projects.

"Uh... how do we start?"

Really? You're sitting in front of a computer... and you don't know how to start researching your topic?

And Heaven forbid they try using books.

"How do you turn this thing on?"

 

[GimpyIntellect]

Not one lurking newbie showed up.

This thread was one colossal failure.

 

[pollynova]

Not one lurking newbie showed up.

This thread was one colossal failure.

I'm still kind of new.

 

[GimpyIntellect]

I'm still kind of new.

Awesome! Nice to meet you! Now let's see some titties!

 

[pollynova]

Awesome! Nice to meet you! Now let's see some titties!

Maybe if they were worth showing off.

 

[Paendragon]

I's this' site a good site for me to post to cauese im new and i like stories about incest and my grandmother just got home from deploy'ment' i don't want ppl to be mean to me because i don't know how to use the search function and i heard that the authors h'an'gout is a bad place to go and incest along with how to help me find a story i was reading

Epic.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Maybe if they were worth showing off.

That has never stopped others before from strutting their stuff! There are some strange people here. I swear some girl who posted her pics here before had a tail. I know it.