Is it cheating to be on these blogs without your spouse?

[pornfreaks]

Wondering how others feel about this. Hubby and I are on a couple other forums like this, sometimes we are on together sometimes alone. It doesn't bother us, but I was talking to a coworker about it and she say's that she considers it cheating if her husband did something like this without her.
What are others feelings about this.

 

[DarkPleasures]

Of course not.

 

[Trimjob69]

Wondering how others feel about this. Hubby and I are on a couple other forums like this, sometimes we are on together sometimes alone. It doesn't bother us, but I was talking to a coworker about it and she say's that she considers it cheating if her husband did something like this without her.
What are others feelings about this.

I can verify that it's not cheating

 

[BearMe]

not cheating

Consider this: many of us have partners who do not hang out with us on Lit. It is FAR "safer" to play with cyber friends here in these threads and with PMs than it would be if we were all screwing as many other people as we play with here

 

[Jake1945]

I suppose it could be cheating if you are hiding it from her and the time spent here is taking away from your together time. On the other hand, I see no problem with her reading romance novels so I feel free to read dirty stories and the forum posts here. After all it is broadening my education.

 

[HomerSimpson123]

Of course not.

My wife tells me you're wrong.

 

[SandraMustard]

We write stories together. We share forum time. There is no 'without' in our lives so we can't cheat.

Cheating comes from what is in your heart, not what you do. If a husband and wife don't share erotic interests, one can be here and even talk of sexual things without cheating on the one who is not here, as long as the motive is understanding how people do things in other situations. The seeker may be hoping to find a method to enhance their sexual relationship at home so the motive is noble. If the seeker fantasies about meeting/fucking other people from Lit, they are cheating even if they don't actually do something physical.

 

[Hans101]

Reading posts on a message board?

Not cheating.

Trading racy messages with members of the opposite sex (or so they claim to be) for the purpose of sexual gratification?

Definitely within the penumbra of cheating.

If it is something you've promised not to do, then it is cheating.

 

[pplwatching]

.....

 

[magicalmoments]

Wondering how others feel about this. Hubby and I are on a couple other forums like this, sometimes we are on together sometimes alone. It doesn't bother us, but I was talking to a coworker about it and she say's that she considers it cheating if her husband did something like this without her.
What are others feelings about this.

I feel your co-worker, and others be they male or female, are revealing their fundamental insecurities by such admissions.

These are the people who give their spouses a hard time for having a friendly chat with the checkout operator at the supermarket.

 

[july_night]

When I was with my spouse whom i was madly in love with and sexually driven crazy by the last thing on my mibd was logging onto this dumb site to chat with thousands a jagoff most doingvtjir damnedest to hide their true identy and live in a fantasy world so they could pretend to be or feel some thing they didn't have or be ssomeone theyre not. Now he's in prison and still this is a last resort.

 

[Elizabeth_Stark]

•••••

 

[screwher]

agreed

Reading posts on a message board?

Not cheating.

Trading racy messages with members of the opposite sex (or so they claim to be) for the purpose of sexual gratification?

Definitely within the penumbra of cheating.

If it is something you've promised not to do, then it is cheating.

I'll agree with this. Besides, for me my main interest is my wife, and married women in general, having sex with other men.

 

[KinkyGAGuy]

That depends on what your spouse or partner thinks. If you think your spouse would get upset, or feel betrayed, then it could be cheating.

For what it is worth, I have permission to do this from my gf! She ends up reaping the rewards!

 

[boomer177]

I can verify that it's not cheating

I love it.

 

[SR8771]

Another thought

If you are on the boards instead of spending time with your SO, it's a sign of larger issues.

If you are on the boards as a replacement for a disinterested SO, then it's a little different.

Most people I believe would choose to explore these things with their SO, but are met with resistance.

 

[boomer177]

The seeker may be hoping to find a method to enhance their sexual relationship at home so the motive is noble.

Will members of Lit's nobility please stand up.

Just doing a survey, SM. Ow, damn, those boobs really hurt, you know.

 

[SlutAddicted]

Maybe, maybe not

Cheating involves violating a trust or breaking the rules. Whether or not you are cheating can only be ascertained in relation to the agreed upon or unspoken parameters of your relationship.

For anybody who objects to their partner being on here or looking at porn I suppose my question would be why? I can see where having a sexual relationship with another (even if only online) could be regarded as cheating because it violates an expectation of exclusivity. But I also hear some people whose perspective seems to be a moral judgment more so than any real sense of having been wronged. In that case I think one needs to ask oneself whether they are being realistic with themselves about their SO. There is a distinct possibility that people seeking porn are compensating for something missing in their sex lives and that reflects on their SO. That is not to say it their SOs fault but it is incumbent on us to see or SOs sexuality for what it is not just the parts we approve of. If hubby is looking at dirty pics between your scheduled monthly sex session guess what - you are neglecting their sexual needs.

 

[DarkPleasures]

My wife tells me you're wrong.

How on earth could browsing/posting on Lit, or similar sites, be cheating? Are you fucking someone behind her back?

 

[possum123]

Not cheating as long as being on here is the only thing you are doing.

 

[KINKYCanada]

How on earth could browsing/posting on Lit, or similar sites, be cheating? Are you fucking someone behind her back?

I agree with Dark in this issue! I love my wife. But until I have relations with another person where psychical and emotional feelings are shared I am not cheating!

Of course my opinion is a little biased seeing as cheating gets me off and I always hope she will send me pics of her with a dick in her mouth! But that is neither here nor there. (sorry got off topic! All this talk of cheating has got me hot!)

KC

 

[subwannabe]

I came here to get ideas to help improve my sex life (and my wife's). That's not cheating. That's actually doing something to improve your marriage. I agree though that if you are corresponding with someone in a sexual way or posting or answering an ad in the personals section then that has crossed the line. Some women are just too frigid in what they label things. Watching porn behind your wife's back is another example. My take on it is you shouldn't have to do it behind their backs and if you do, it is because there is something wrong with your relationship in the first place that you can't be open about it.

 

[LegsOpenedWide]

I'm undecided. It's something I struggle with

 

[BloodMoonRising]

Don't know. Don't care.

 

[tammyw]

I think it would be cheating if you were engaging with people in cyber sex, enchanging sexy emails, and or pictures or videos. I don't know if I would be devastated if I found out my husband was reading posts on the board, but I would be really upset if he was hiding an online relationship or friendship from me. It would be especially hurtful, especially because we are so open with each other about everything. I would be more hurt by his failure to communicate than the fact that he was on here having fun. This being said, my husband knows about what I do on here and is supportive provided I am honest about things and answer any questions he might have. He joins me as I peruse sometimes, but knows have female friends with whom we do much more than chat...