The Isolated Blurt Thread XIII: I'll Gladly Pay You Tuesday for Slap and Tickle Today

[pointless]

No, our internet was dandy all day. We had a snowstorm this morning and none of the elderly came out of their homes.

Sounds like they were being lazy.

i honestly think they were planning on leaving. it was dark and spooky in the library today.

and they looked pissy.

 

[Sean]

Porn.

http://www.caranddriver.com/photo-gallery/2016-aston-martin-vulcan-photos-and-info-news#1

 

[yossi]

i honestly think they were planning on leaving. it was dark and spooky in the library today.

and they looked pissy.

You walked in right before the orgy. Rude.

 

[pointless]

bougie motherfucker.

 

[pointless]

You walked in right before the orgy. Rude.

gross.

unless the girl who was walking out when i was walking in was coming back. that would make it better. i'd watch that.

and/or stick my penis in her.

 

[pointless]

why am i watching espn? it's not football season.

 

[Saint Peter]

peepers!!

 

[Saint Peter]

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51I8UuBFdEL.jpg

You should have a doctor look at that.

 

[Wings]

Whitening my teeth professionally and getting my gap closed. I think this is my bridezilla moment.

 

[Saint Peter]

sappy

 

[Wings]

Don't make me bite you with my shiny teeth.

 

[Saint Peter]

Keep that shiny tooth away from me!

 

[Killswitch]

Thanks for the earworm, Jelly!!


At least it wasn't Nickelback.

I like nickleback, or I did.

 

[Wings]

Keep that shiny tooth away from me!

Yeah, that's right. Fear the tooth. FEAR IT!

 

[Wings]

I just want to eat my Twizzlers but I don't want this guy next to me judging me.


Or asking for any.

 

[Saint Peter]

Yeah, that's right. Fear the tooth. FEAR IT!

I worked with a metal finisher that had one tooth.

The guy had an apple for lunch.

Every day.

It was painful to watch.

 

[Wings]

I worked with a metal finisher that had one tooth.

The guy had an apple for lunch.

Every day.

It was painful to watch.

Now I'm. Well. Now I'm picturing it.



WAIT! Why did he have only one tooth? Was it an industrial incident thing?

 

[Wings]

He probably tried to eat someone's Twizzlers and they knocked all his teef out.

 

[Saint Peter]

He was old and drank heavily.

Not sure if that had anything to do with the teeth or not.

 

[Saint Peter]

I wonder if Mona likes the Butthole Surfers.

 

[Saint Peter]

I think it was a little much for her.

I should have gone with Audrey Hepburn instead.

 

[spacekowboy]

Whitening my teeth professionally and getting my gap closed. I think this is my bridezilla moment.

Women in need of getting their gaps filled around here and yet nary a ring at my phone. Dafuq, man!

 

[Saint Peter]

You a flosser?

 

[spacekowboy]

You a flosser?

And a tosser.

 

[Saint Peter]

Plenty of work?