Litiquette3

[dutchrain]

I have done it on google. But I meant on Lit. I mean, you search my real name on Google and you find all my movies and charity work and talents and the like. But I just meant on Lit.

It surprised (and shocked me a bit) me in how many places my name appeared when I googled my real name.

I have never done it on Lit.

 

[37_ttej]

I have done it on google. But I meant on Lit. I mean, you search my real name on Google and you find all my movies and charity work and talents and the like. But I just meant on Lit.

I'm 'lucky' that I share my name with a reasonably famous American TV actor. So Googling my name gets you a whole lotta red carpet pics etc which aren't me.

I am, of course, much better looking.

PS: No, my name is NOT Lindsay Lohan!

 

[dutchrain]

I'm 'lucky' that I share my name with a reasonably famous American TV actor. So Googling my name gets you a whole lotta red carpet pics etc which aren't me.

I am, of course, much better looking.

PS: No, my name is NOT Lindsay Lohan!

Phew ... *wipes brow*

 

[Suz_anne]

I'm 'lucky' that I share my name with a reasonably famous American TV actor. So Googling my name gets you a whole lotta red carpet pics etc which aren't me.

I am, of course, much better looking.

PS: No, my name is NOT Lindsay Lohan!

James Deen?

 

[37_ttej]

James Deen?

Nup.

And I ain't telling, neither.

Bonus: My surname is not 'Squarepants'.

 

[Suz_anne]

Nup.

And I ain't telling, neither.

Bonus: My surname is not 'Squarepants'.

No on Lohan.
No on Deen.
No on Squarepants.

Well, that means there's only one alternative left. Nice to meet you, Burt Reynolds.

 

[dutchrain]

No on Lohan.
No on Deen.
No on Squarepants.

Well, that means there's only one alternative left. Nice to meet you, Burt Reynolds.

Burt Reynolds isn't bad, but Steve McQueen ...

 

[37_ttej]

No on Lohan.
No on Deen.
No on Squarepants.

Well, that means there's only one alternative left. Nice to meet you, Burt Reynolds.

Dang, you got me!

http://www.troll.me/images/fat-ninja/i-am-burt-reynolds.jpg

 

[Lord Pmann]

So I did a vanity search... Why the fuck aren't you all talking about me?!?! I mean, I'm mentioned a few times. Someone thought I was nice. Some people want to have dinner with me. I'm pretty sure cowslinger has a crush on me.

But you fuckers need to up your Pmann talk. *wags finger*

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

So I did a vanity search... Why the fuck aren't you all talking about me?!?! I mean, I'm mentioned a few times. Someone thought I was nice. Some people want to have dinner with me. I'm pretty sure cowslinger has a crush on me.

But you fuckers need to up your Pmann talk. *wags finger*

how about this, Pmann.
Why don't you do a vanity search for me..
Then tell everyone how wonderful I already know I am...
Sound like a plan?

 

[Paul_Chance]

I am probably guilty of not mentioning Pmann enough in one post about Pmann, so I will try up my Pmann quotient.

Never did a vanity search for myself on Lit.

Did on Google, but like above, I am fortunate enough to share the real name as a minor celebrity with a good PR firm, so apparently I do all kinds of cool shit. I also have four kids and two ex-wives, own a charter fishing business in Florida, worked for the BBC, have been arrested in Michigan for illegal gambling and run mud races in Georgia. Damn. No wonder I am so tired!

 

[Lord Pmann]

how about this, Pmann.
Why don't you do a vanity search for me..
Then tell everyone how wonderful I already know I am...
Sound like a plan?

This is my narcissism, thank you.

 

[ChainedUp]

With all the drama around this place it seems like a good time to saunter back in for a guest appearance and question.

While I can say that I am 100% up to speed on all the "lit fraud" goings on, I have read enough to know what's going on. I get how the presenting ones self as a gender other than your own is inappropriate but I would offer three things:

1) what percent of you have been 100% honest here with who you are and how you present yourself ( no need to out yourself )?

2) is the uproar more based on the embarrassment of being duped?

3) I admit that once upon a time, in a land far, far away, I too was duped. But once I stepped back I realized that dude made me cum and in those moments I believed what I wanted to believe.

So, to form an actual question , why, in this land of make believe, do we allow ourselves to be wound up by the illusion of fantasies?

 

[Endless_Night]

Dude! What are you doing up!

Well, I'm definitely not up on the "Lit fraud" stuff. I've pretty much wandered off the Playground, at least for now. Honestly, all the drama bores me.

1) Honest? Yep.
2) I don't know.
3)

As far as the question goes.... I guess it's how you look at it. Lit may be a "land of make believe" to some, but I'm not much good at pretend. I prefer people to be honest. I'll be honest back.

*shrug* Easy Peasy.

 

[Endless_Night]

So I did a vanity search... Why the fuck aren't you all talking about me?!?! I mean, I'm mentioned a few times. Someone thought I was nice. Some people want to have dinner with me. I'm pretty sure cowslinger has a crush on me.

But you fuckers need to up your Pmann talk. *wags finger*

Oooops! Almost forgot to mention Pmann.

Your narcissism must be fed. Besides, you enlightened me on the whole vanity search thing!

 

[SweetSam42]

What?? A rare appearance by himself!

I admit I have very little clue as to what's going on here lately, but I have a few thoughts:

1. This is the land of illusion. I guess I haven't been duped, but I sort of think I'm outside the norm. I hear phrases like "being true to yourself" thrown around here all the time, and I don't understand what that's all about. It's the Internet. I assume people here are lying or hiding certain things. Most of it's harmless in my opinion. When it's beyond that, as seems to be the case in the recent incident, then that's another matter. When people's feelings are hurt, shit has gone too far. That's just not cool. Some really sweet folks were hurt.

2. Sort of related to the illusion/fantasy question: A lot of folks here seem hung up on exclusivity in a Lit romance. Not sure why that's a thing, as most of us are here without the knowledge of our spouses, so it's all tantamount to cheating in so many cases. It's always struck me as odd, and I wouldn't have the audacity to ask anyone I talk to online to only fuck around with me. Maybe that's just me.

 

[Thandi]

So, to form an actual question , why, in this land of make believe, do we allow ourselves to be wound up by the illusion of fantasies?

I am on Lit hiatus at the current moment. Pissed off by many things going on around here these days.

I am who I am....I am usually sweet & caring with a very positive outlook, however I will cut you if you threaten me or people I care about.
Two people that are friends of mine got hurt by two different individuals here.
Both of those people are fucking asshats.

I recently got put in my place by someone who didn't care for me stating the truth.....keeping within the illusion of fantasies I guess.

Many of us come here because something is lacking in our real world. We want to believe a connection that we have made here made is real. Sometimes we desperately need to believe it. When it is shattered it can be devastating to some.

We are all real people here. Behind the sarcasm, the bravado...we all have glass hearts. We need to feel wanted, desired, loved.
It hurts like fuck when reality hits and you've been the recipient of complete and total asstwattery.

This is why I work with animals....sometimes I really hate people.

*Takes soapbox, and leaves quietly through the mousehole*

 

[Paul_Chance]

1) what percent of you have been 100% honest here with who you are and how you present yourself ( no need to out yourself )?

2) is the uproar more based on the embarrassment of being duped?

3) I admit that once upon a time, in a land far, far away, I too was duped. But once I stepped back I realized that dude made me cum and in those moments I believed what I wanted to believe.

So, to form an actual question , why, in this land of make believe, do we allow ourselves to be wound up by the illusion of fantasies?

80% (20% reserved for privacies sake), the victims are real, but, if you notice they aren't driving or feeding the small uproar. I've cybered with men - sometimes knowing they were men (as in a man portraying a woman), sometimes with them being deceptive, I personally don't care. I've read novels and masturbated to hot sex scenes written by men, so, to me, it's the words that matter.

As for the question, I think there are three very general types of people who land on sites like Lit. One group is looking for relationships outside of the internet, and to them, the internet is just a portal, like a bar - meet online, take it offline. One group is here purely for the fantasy - to them, it's more akin to straight up porn sites, with an human-to-human immediacy. The third group lands in the middle and splits the difference.

I think it tends to be that middle group that gets hurts, in part because the fantasy blends with reality and the line gets blurred and hurt results because the participants each put the line in different places, but think they have it in the same place - and this, well, this is no different then what happens in real life. People deceive, other people get hurt, sometimes the deceiver gets hurt. That is what we call life.

Lit exclusivity (or any online exclusivity) is a strange thing to me - but, if that is what the person wants to fulfill their illusion, then that's between them. The only caution I'd throw out there is the old story that predates the internet. You go out to the bar, you drink too much (or just enough), then have slamming sex barely knowing each others name. Then, you fall in love, get deeply involved and get wounded when you discover your partner is someone who - parties, drinks, and fucks strangers. Really? This surprised you?

 

[dutchrain]

With all the drama around this place it seems like a good time to saunter back in for a guest appearance and question.

While I can say that I am 100% up to speed on all the "lit fraud" goings on, I have read enough to know what's going on. I get how the presenting ones self as a gender other than your own is inappropriate but I would offer three things:

1) what percent of you have been 100% honest here with who you are and how you present yourself ( no need to out yourself )?

2) is the uproar more based on the embarrassment of being duped?

3) I admit that once upon a time, in a land far, far away, I too was duped. But once I stepped back I realized that dude made me cum and in those moments I believed what I wanted to believe.

So, to form an actual question , why, in this land of make believe, do we allow ourselves to be wound up by the illusion of fantasies?

1 Is it dishonest to not tell certain things? Because that is what I do. On the boards I won't talk about certain things, per PM I talk about a bit more. In RPs my imagination runs a bit rampant sometimes. But an RP is the perfect territory for that.

2 The uproar might be based on the embarrassment of being duped, but it also is fueled by bystanders to whom it isn't enough to tell the duped how sorry the are and how bad the duper is, and spread their opinion on this over several threads. Actually it is more the bystanders creating the uproar than the duped.

3 Poor you! Or not so poor you since you had fun. I think the situation changes if it is not only about fun and sexual release, if honest feelings get invested.

If someones feelings are hurt we (I) get wound up.

If I choose to imagine the hunky twenty something AV of a seventy year old man is a true portrait of him, that is nice for my imagination, and for his too. No hurt feelings there.

 

[Endless_Night]

As for the question, I think there are three very general types of people who land on sites like Lit. One group is looking for relationships outside of the internet, and to them, the internet is just a portal, like a bar - meet online, take it offline. One group is here purely for the fantasy - to them, it's more akin to straight up porn sites, with an human-to-human immediacy. The third group lands in the middle and splits the difference.

I think this^ is very relevant. What you’re here for can make an enormous difference in how you act. When you have individuals interacting with different agendas, the potential for disconnect is great. People are going to get hurt.

I find this whole dishonesty thing, and the uproar that accompanies it, confusing. I entered Lit on a different board, one with a lot less “play”. One of the things that surprised me when I first wandered onto the Playground was the number of married people here to “play” without the knowledge of their partner. (Okay. I probably shouldn’t have been, but I was. )

The second thing I noticed was that phrases like “everybody lies” and “everybody is hiding something” and “it’s the internet” are bandied about like a mantra. Many people do, quite openly, view the place as a “land of make believe”, a place to work out their fantasies.

All the above certainly implies, if not outright states, that honesty is not a primary ingredient for interaction on Lit. In my experience, one lie begets another. Some people lie about their relationship status, some about their intentions. If you view the place as a separate reality, separate from real life, it’s probably easy to tack on little additions to the fantasy you’re living.

No doubt I’ll get lambasted for this, but I just don’t see why some lies are acceptable here and others are not. Where does the line get drawn?

When we get caught? When people get hurt? When people we like get hurt?

So many marrieds are here on the sly. Wouldn’t some on their spouses be hurt? If they knew their partner was on Lit?

Absolutely not making any judgements here, but how is that lie “okay” and others not? Because it doesn’t happen on the board? Because we’re only lying to our nearest and dearest?

Seriously, the honesty “rules” on here just don’t make any kind of logical sense to me….

 

[SmileyGirl]

Thank you thank you Endless.....lies are not acceptable to me whether you are online or offline. If you are deliberately dishonest when you know the other party may/will get hurt just to "get your rocks off" then in my opinion it makes you a liar, dishonest and a person I wouldn't want to have anything to do with on or offline. Life is too short to put up with twats not being honest about who or what they are. I don't expect anyone to tell me their life story but I would like honesty and a little bit of fucking respect.

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

I guess if I were sorry I started that thread, I'd apologize, however, since that's not the case, I won't.
Now, I'm not one of the duped, and I didn't create the thread for he-saids-she-saids. I asked the posters who do it to explain why.

For whatever reason, whenever I ask "why questions" around here, I get flamed.
I'm asking for trouble.
I'm judgemental and it's none of my business.

Go fucking figure

We can have the "Would you corn hole the guy above you while he sucks on a Binky!" thread, and no one batts an eye. Guess what? It's none of anybody's business if I want to peg that guy or not, so I DON'T post in that thread .

I think there's a serious double standard when it comes to what is acceptable to talk about, disagree about, etc around here. Too many hot buttons.

We've been presented with some ridiculous questions (in this thread in fact!) that people either chime in on, or not. You decide if you want to answer or not. Why does this present such a problem?

Ex: Paul is admittedly open, polyamorous..
Me, not so much.. Does that mean by my asking him why he enjoys it I'm somehow being invasive?

No, it does not. It's just me (an inquirer) asking for more information so that I can form my opinion.

I think we all agree that RP is expected, encouraged and supported around here. It's when the people don't communicate upfront that problems arise.

I mean, what's so odd about just saying, "Oh, yeah, by the way, I like to be a sissy sometimes. Have you ever role played with a man that way? Would you be interested? "

My answer would be "Yes, I've played with a man who liked to be sissified... But, no, I don't enjoy it. Not my kink. Have you tried the "such-in-such" forum? Maybe you can find a partner there?"

I'm mean how fucking hard is that?

I'm not rude. I've stated my preference, there was no lying.. Etc. Etc..

The thing that set this incident apart, although it is far from a singular episode, is that malicious deception came into play.

If you're role playing great. But if you are carrying on an ongoing relationship with someone outside of Lit, outside of the roleplay threads, outside of your virtual reality, you've crossed a line if you continue the façade.

It' s up to all parties to verify who they're paying with.

 

[TongueLust]

Thank you thank you Endless.....lies are not acceptable to me whether you are online or offline. If you are deliberately dishonest when you know the other party may/will get hurt just to "get your rocks off" then in my opinion it makes you a liar, dishonest and a person I wouldn't want to have anything to do with on or offline. Life is too short to put up with twats not being honest about who or what they are. I don't expect anyone to tell me their life story but I would like honesty and a little bit of fucking respect.

I agree, I am 100% me and I don't get why some have a problem with it.

I speak my mind, I'm not going to censor myself just because somebody doesn't like it.

All you have to do is ignore, I don't get the games- just be straight up.

You will be respected and it will go a long way.

Whether it is fantasy or not, I prefer honesty.... I don't like BS.

If we play, we play, but don't try to "play" me.

 

[butterfly_flip]

Thank you thank you Endless.....lies are not acceptable to me whether you are online or offline. If you are deliberately dishonest when you know the other party may/will get hurt just to "get your rocks off" then in my opinion it makes you a liar, dishonest and a person I wouldn't want to have anything to do with on or offline. Life is too short to put up with twats not being honest about who or what they are. I don't expect anyone to tell me their life story but I would like honesty and a little bit of fucking respect.

I agree. To me it doesn;t matter what medium we use for communication/interraction with others....lies are lies, deception still hurts, and the feeling of being taken in and made to feel foolish by someone you trusted is real.

 

[NorthRockJohnson]

How hard is it to just be real? That's my question. I'm an interesting enough guy on my own. Why would I need an "Internet persona"?

Just be real about who you are and what you want. Misleading and lying to people is just fucking pathetic.