Litiquette3

[BrokenRomantic]

We all like to feel special. And we are all different. Snowflakes and shit. But what is it that people can do to really make you feel good? What lifts your spirit when you are down? What can a friend or, as BBB would say, a "lover" (which I accidentally typed liver) do to make you happy?

I really don't require much. I just want to feel like my presence is welcome and that I'm important. If someone can manage to do that, then it's pretty awesome.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Here is my question...

We all like to feel special. And we are all different. Snowflakes and shit. But what is it that people can do to really make you feel good? What lifts your spirit when you are down? What can a friend or, as BBB would say, a "lover" (which I accidentally typed liver) do to make you happy?

my top two 'Love Languages' are Quality Time and Physical Touch (including, but not limited to, sex). If someone wants to make me feel cared for, they can spend time with me, and be affectionate toward me. Easy-peasy.

In terms of an SO, meeting the need for Quality Time usually just means hanging out together. It doesn't matter what we do, as long as we're together. in an irl relationship, he can visit with me while I do household stuff, I can go with him to run errands, we can go see a movie, go out with friends, or just take a drive. I don't care what we're doing, as long as we're experiencing life together. in an online situation, this looks like touching base several times each day and/or sizeable chunks of time spent emailing or voicing or whatever. again, it's not about what we're doing so much as the fact that he's spending time with me. if he hasn't got the time to invest, it's not going to work.

Physical Touch seems like a no-brainer, but it's a huge deal for someone who 'hears' love through touch. it's not just sex, although frequent and high-quality, intimate coupling covers a lot of that ground. it's little things all throughout the day--planting a smooch on my forehead, touching my cheek, playing with my hair, pulling me to him for a quick squeeze, holding hands or walking with his arm around my shoulders or my waist. reaching out to touch my arm when he talks to me, sitting close enough to me for his clothes to brush against mine, a long and tender embrace--long enough for me to relax into him and sigh the stress of the day away. and kissing--lots of kissing!

I don't need flowers and chocolates and diamonds and Hawaiian cruises.
I need him to want to spend time with me. and grab my ass.

 

[Endless_Night]

*pokes head in*

No question? Dropping the ball, Pmann?

 

[Lord Pmann]

Yes, my balls are dropping left and right. Fuck. I'm a negligent king.

How about this for today's question...

Do you have a type? At Lit? In your every day life? If so, what is it?

And the response "Pmann" isn't sufficient.

 

[NorthRockJohnson]

Yes, my balls are dropping left and right. Fuck. I'm a negligent king.

How about this for today's question...

Do you have a type? At Lit? In your every day life? If so, what is it?

And the response "Pmann" isn't sufficient.

I don't think I've ever really had a type honestly. At least not physically. I'm the kind of guy who doesn't really know what he likes until he sees it. I find all kinds of different physical aspects attractive. Personality goes a long way though. If you're funny and cool and laid back I'm likely to take interest.

 

[Thandi]

Yes, my balls are dropping left and right. Fuck. I'm a negligent king.

How about this for today's question...

Do you have a type? At Lit? In your every day life? If so, what is it?

And the response "Pmann" isn't sufficient.

Romantic, funny, confident, has quiet inner beauty.
Can spell and is a positive person.
Shows respect to others and takes regular showers.
Will cook for me, and likes cats.
Spontaneous and a hard worker.
Excellent lover and can play the acoustic guitar.

I don't really ask for much.

 

[Endless_Night]

Do I have a physical type? Absolutely. Which rather goes out the window when we’re talking Lit. The internet doesn’t really allow the same latitude for physical attraction.

Otherwise, Lit and every day life are still rather different, though some things remain the same. I like intelligent men. Men who can answer hard questions.

But in daily life I prefer calm, steady, emotionally neutral men. I tend to be volatile, so a nice, level companion helps to keeps things running on a smooth basis. On Lit my baser side peeks out; I’m drawn to a different emotional type. Men more likely to match my own moodiness, and who express dominance in some way that I find attractive. Of course I still put them through the wringer when it comes to answering questions.

I like people that can answer questions.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Romantic, funny, confident, has quiet inner beauty.
Can spell and is a positive person.
Shows respect to others and takes regular showers.
Will cook for me, and likes cats.
Spontaneous and a hard worker.
Excellent lover and can play the acoustic guitar.

I don't really ask for much.

I'll take one of those, please.

Just sub in 'dogs' for 'cats.'

I don't care if he likes my cat or not, and neither does my cat.

 

[dutchrain]

Yes, my balls are dropping left and right. Fuck. I'm a negligent king.

How about this for today's question...

Do you have a type? At Lit? In your every day life? If so, what is it?

And the response "Pmann" isn't sufficient.

My type in RL, I am attracted to tall men. They are my eye candy. A male head sticking out above the sea of heads will catch my attention and I'll discretely move to a position I can ogle the rest of him.

My type on Lit, educated, well-mannered, well-written, well-spoken, humorous, romantic, confident, spontaneous, excellent lover. For my RL type add: clean body (in a normal hygienic manner, I don't want him to strip and sanitize as soon as he enters the door), cooks (or at least tries to, able to brew a good cuppa would be great too) once in a while, somewhat tidy, has a job or/and volunteers, has a hobby or two (which don't take all of his time!). For my ideal type add: is a head taller than I am, plays the guitar well and or sings, writes erotic erotic stories, has longish dark or shortish blond hair, has a bit of abs (I mean abs which I am able to see) and has stamina.

 

[Paul_Chance]

I sat here and thought about it for a while, but I really don't have a physical type, with one exception. I am attracted to people who are comfortable in their own skin, physically, whatever that may mean. Beauty and sensuality ooze from people who possess that characteristic.

That aside, the other type I have is - intelligent, articulate, confident, compassionate. As much as I like sex, you can't have sex all day - so there has to be more to the equation - they have to be engaged in the great journey that is life.

LOL - though, I did flash on the line from "So I Married An Axe Murderer" - "I know we're supposed to say "a sense of humor", but, I'll have to go with big breasts."

Or, and of course, PMann. PMann is everyone's type. Heck, even George Clooney wants to be PMann.

 

[Thandi]

Or, and of course, PMann. PMann is everyone's type. Heck, even George Clooney wants to be PMann.

LOL! Love it.

 

[Lord Pmann]

As expected, I knew your descriptions were all going to describe me to a fare the well. I appreciate that. I'm truly humbled. Or whatever they say.

And for the record, George Clooney not only wishes he could be me, he wants to fuck me too. He's not my type though.

I have to admit, the most alarming of these traits I saw was "has to take regular showers". Has that been a past problem?

I have a particular type. It's that total girl next door look that does it for me. And brains. Holy shit. If a girl is smart AND has that look... I'm hooked. Oh, and good taste in music as well. That's a must. We can't be listening to shitty music while we fuck.

And on a classy note... Boobs.

 

[dutchrain]

I have to admit, the most alarming of these traits I saw was "has to take regular showers". Has that been a past problem?

Yes .

 

[Lord Pmann]

Yes .

French guys? They're the worst.

 

[dutchrain]

French guys? They're the worst.

"French bathing" is a phrase one hears here occasionally.

It means spraying awful loads of eau de cologne over oneself instead of stepping under a shower.

 

[SweetSam42]

What is it with the showering anyway? How hard is it to freaking bathe? I'll never understand men who think its ok to just skip a day or 3.

My type physically is typically tall and lanky. Not too thin, but I like em long and lean. And with strong shoulders. Runners, please inquire within.

On lit, humor and intelligence that stands out is attractive. If a man can get my goofiness, then he's a winner.

Oh, and all things Pmann of course.

 

[dutchrain]

Dear and mighty King Pmann, since your inquirious mind seems to have run out off questions, I hope you'll grant me the honor of asking one.

Men posing as women, this time not to "chat" with men but with women, what do you think of this practice?

I know RA started a thread about it, but that one (the thread to be precise, not RA) doesn't abide to our seriousness on how we treat earnest matters. There are even cock-pics on it!

 

[Miasorrow]

Dear and mighty King Pmann, since your inquirious mind seems to have run out off questions, I hope you'll grant me the honor of asking one.

Men posing as women, this time not to "chat" with men but with women, what do you think of this practice?

I know RA started a thread about it, but that one (the thread to be precise, not RA) doesn't abide to our seriousness on how we treat earnest matters. There are even cock-pics on it!

Morning!

Please post a link to the above thread. Thank you.

So, does me not actually having many women pming me around here helps me? Only Bisexual or Lesbian women approach me. Do you think they might be men too?

 

[dutchrain]

Morning!

Please post a link to the above thread. Thank you.

So, does me not actually having many women pming me around here helps me? Only Bisexual or Lesbian women approach me. Do you think they might be men too?

Good morning to you too!

The required link

I am afraid a few of the bisexual and lesbian women on this site might actually be men!

 

[Thandi]

Dear and mighty King Pmann, since your inquirious mind seems to have run out off questions, I hope you'll grant me the honor of asking one.

Men posing as women, this time not to "chat" with men but with women, what do you think of this practice?

I know RA started a thread about it, but that one (the thread to be precise, not RA) doesn't abide to our seriousness on how we treat earnest matters. There are even cock-pics on it!

Well Dutchy you know my feelings on it....well I guess everyone does if they read the thread. I think it's abhorrent behaviour. Real people are getting hurt. Disgusting.

But those cock pics are awesome! !!

 

[Miasorrow]

Good morning to you too!

The required link

I am afraid a few of the bisexual and lesbian women on this site might actually be men!

I see...women are men..bisexuals are men..lesbians are men..
Where did all the women go?

 

[Lord Pmann]

Thank you Dutch, for posting a question. I was super busy this weekend and I had no time to post a question. I'm happy for others to post questions. I mean, it's not really my thread anyway. I just sort of elected myself king when Papa Chained left.

I don't quite understand the reasoning behind why a guy would pose as a girl to chat. I mean, I guess maybe their thing is hearing about girl on girl action. I didn't read the thread yet, but I'll have a look.

I think people here often forget that there are real people behind the screens with actual hearts and actual feelings. It's tough to open up and be vulnerable and then it sucks when someone gets screwed over like that. The situations here are often difficult and it sucks when people get hurt.

 

[dutchrain]

I see...women are men..bisexuals are men..lesbians are men..
Where did all the women go?

*nods solemnly* There is just you, Thandi, Sam, me and a few other real women here. Maybe we should make a list?

Thank you Dutch, for posting a picture. I was super busy this weekend and I had no time to post a question. I'm happy for others to post questions. I mean, it's not really my thread anyway. I just sort of elected myself king when Papa Chained left.

I don't quite understand the reasoning behind why a guy would pose as a girl to chat. I mean, I guess maybe their thing is hearing about girl on girl action. I didn't read the thread yet, but I'll have a look.

I think people here often forget that there are real people behind the screens with actual hearts and actual feelings. It's tough to open up and be vulnerable and then it sucks when someone gets screwed over like that. The situations here are often difficult and it sucks when people get hurt.

I didn't post no picture!

Back to my question.
I think it is done by people seeking a thrill. Maybe they tried numerous asshat PMs, and didn't get the result they were after. Maybe they just think posing as a woman is much better than sending asshat PMs.

Maybe they think it isn't bad to do, because: if a lesbian or bisexual women gets off too where is the harm? They get off, the poser gets off, everybody should be happy, no?

What they forget (or ignore) is they aren't talking to bots but to living, feeling human beings.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Feel free to add me to the list of women. I'm the first woman posing as a man. I'm terribly pretty.

I didn't post no picture!

Doh!!! I meant question. That was either autocorrect or I was just super excited about some cock pics. Because I am a woman.

 

[Paul_Chance]

Wait! PMann is both our King AND our Queen? That's...awesome.

On the more serious side of the topic.

I think it happens for a couple of reasons - and at the surface level, I would say - feel free to come online and pretend to be whoever (or whatever) you want.

-Some of them are men dealing with complex inner sexual tensions and it is their foray into transgender territory. They are pretending to be women because they want to be women and this is a "safe" environment for that behavior as opposed to their real world lives. The whole purpose of that behavior is not to be a "man pretending to be a woman" but to be perceived as a woman. This group needs love, compassion and support.

-Some of them are men trying to cyber women while pretending to be lesbian or bisexual, since they are not getting any play as men. (Though, again, there could be complex sexual identity issues at play subconsciously.)

-Some are basic trolls, who are doing it for shits and giggles, or for the thrill of then outing the victim as having been fooled.

The line that gets crossed is when real relationships begin to form, real emotional connections, real feelings, real attachments - and the gender issue is still concealed. I think, for a type of personality, the "other" on the internet is not real. I think that is a personality type and at the end of the day, there isn't much we (as a community or individuals) can do about it. They hear it, they know it, but deep in their psychology they don't accept it.

Maybe some folks here could chime in with ways to be aware of these people based on their experience. Here is what I would suggest:

1. IRL LBGT people will talk to anyone - they're just not interested in sex with genders they are not attracted to. A warning flag is a "bi" or "lesbian" woman who doesn't talk to men.

2. There are gender differences in how men and women think and present themselves, evening in writing. Trust your instinct if someone says something or presents something in a way that doesn't "sound" right.

3. Though stereotypes are dangerous in their own right, be wary of someone who fits a stereotype perfectly - IRL, even those people who are archetypes of a personality have variance. We humans are creatures of wonderful complexity - be wary of someone who lacks that complexity.