Please help me find out what my girl's submissive desire is!

[Secretguy69]

Hello, I am posting here because Im trying to figure out this huge turn on and fantasy of my girl, and I figure since I know it involves her being submissive and me being dominant some of you folks might know, but she won't tell me. I have to figure it out.

Here is what I know:

She says by telling me it would take a lot of the pleasure out of it for her. Its something I have to be into for her to like it.

It goes against how she is, she normally likes getting what she wants, being a leader, hates being degraded or disrespected. Its something degrading and submissive.

She told me it must involve two of my body parts, any two or more, but it doesnt have to be anything specific.

It would be in contact with a more sexual body part of hers typically, like boobs or ass, thighs, but doesnt HAVE to be.

Every body part can be incorporated, its not specific.

She says it can be done anywhere on the body, anytime.

She says its not about WHAT Im doing so much as HOW I do it. She emphasized that strongly.

It often involves sex but also not necessary.

It can involve lifting her body.

It is something passionate.

It can involve squeezing.

It can be painful but doesnt have to be.

It involves NO items or clothing.

Things I know it ISNT because she said so:
Spanking, talking dirty, pinching, biting, scratching, rough sex, constriction , nothing with sex specifically or oral or anything.

If any of you guys could PLEASE help Id appreciate it, I really want to find out but she cant tell me or else it ruins it for her!

 

[KoPilot]

Sounds to me like she's topping from the bottom and wants you to do all the work, take all the responsibility, and be a mind-reader.

Sit her down and make her tell you. If she can't or refuses to or says that it will make you less of a top/dom, then mayyybe don't play with her until she can communicate better. Also, keep in mind that a bottom isnt' the same thing as a submissive isn't the same thing as a slave isn't the same thing as a pet, etc...

 

[MeekMe]

Hello, I am posting here because Im trying to figure out this huge turn on and fantasy of my girl, and I figure since I know it involves her being submissive and me being dominant some of you folks might know, but she won't tell me. I have to figure it out.

Here is what I know:

She says by telling me it would take a lot of the pleasure out of it for her. Its something I have to be into for her to like it.

But not telling you gives her loads of pleasure? My face and palm can't come together faster. It's something you have to be into for her to like it? Basically, she wants you to be more dominant and do things you want to do. So, hopefully for her sake it isn't something she's completely against.

It goes against how she is, she normally likes getting what she wants, being a leader, hates being degraded or disrespected. Its something degrading and submissive.

She told me it must involve two of my body parts, any two or more, but it doesnt have to be anything specific.

It would be in contact with a more sexual body part of hers typically, like boobs or ass, thighs, but doesnt HAVE to be.

Every body part can be incorporated, its not specific.

She says it can be done anywhere on the body, anytime.

She says its not about WHAT Im doing so much as HOW I do it. She emphasized that strongly.

None of this really makes sense. The only thing that is popping out here is that it's not an action, but a tone.

It often involves sex but also not necessary.

It can involve lifting her body.

It is something passionate.

It can involve squeezing.

It can be painful but doesnt have to be.

It involves NO items or clothing.

Things I know it ISNT because she said so:
Spanking, talking dirty, pinching, biting, scratching, rough sex, constriction , nothing with sex specifically or oral or anything.

If any of you guys could PLEASE help Id appreciate it, I really want to find out but she cant tell me or else it ruins it for her!

Again, not having it at all is far more pleasing than just telling you? Will she tell you after you've finally managed to do whatever it is she wants?

Your girlfriend needs to grow up and learn to use her words. If she would like for you to be more dominant, she should just say so. After reading all of that the only thing I got out of it was she's not asking for a physical something specifically, but for you to take on a more dominant approach in your sex life. She also wants you to want to be that person. Which isn't for her to decide, really.

If you are interested in some D/s kind of play I suggest reading up on it. Every relationship is unique so there is not one true way. The only way any of us get what we want is by communicating. You both need to sit down and have an honest talk about what it is you both want. Also, discuss your limits so when you take a guess at whatever it is she won't tell you, the relationship doesn't end badly.

 

[Miles Long]

It sounds like the only desire she really has is driving you crazy.

 

[wicked woman]

Unless you enjoy playing this game of hers, tell her that's not how it works. You require a partner that can communicate her wants and desires. Once she does, you'll decide if it's something you want to participate in.

Personally I don't have a lot of patience for people who expect others to be mind readers.

 

[midwestyankee]

Unless you enjoy playing this game of hers, tell her that's not how it works. You require a partner that can communicate her wants and desires. Once she does, you'll decide if it's something you want to participate in.

Personally I don't have a lot of patience for people who expect others to be mind readers.

Let me see....I think the spirits are speaking to me.....you're thinking of travelling....to a warmer place perhaps...?

 

[CutieMouse]

Easy peasy-

You inform her that if she wants to play games, go do it somewhere else. If she wants to develop a mature, fulfilling, sexually aware relationship... She can start by using her big girl words and actually <gasp> communicating. Like an adult who is self-aware and personally responsible enough to OWN HER 'EFFING DESIRES [instead of putting her partner at risk/expecting him to carry the entire weight of her sexuality].

(I am trying so hard to not go off more than necessary, here, but for the love of all that is kinky... :roll eyes: )

 

[wicked woman]

Let me see....I think the spirits are speaking to me.....you're thinking of travelling....to a warmer place perhaps...?

That comment doesn't really take mind reading, considering where I live.

 

[moon_spirit]

Unless you enjoy playing this game of hers, tell her that's not how it works. You require a partner that can communicate her wants and desires. Once she does, you'll decide if it's something you want to participate in.

Personally I don't have a lot of patience for people who expect others to be mind readers.

^^^She's right.

Plus, if she really wants you to be the dominant one then you demand her to tell you.

 

[moon_spirit]

The Riddle of the Century

Hello, I am posting here because Im trying to figure out this huge turn on and fantasy of my girl, and I figure since I know it involves her being submissive and me being dominant some of you folks might know, but she won't tell me. I have to figure it out.

Here is what I know:

She says by telling me it would take a lot of the pleasure out of it for her. Its something I have to be into for her to like it.
Sounds like she feels embarrassed about saying it? I got no clue.

It goes against how she is, she normally likes getting what she wants, being a leader, hates being degraded or disrespected. Its something degrading and submissive.
She wants to feel helpless and to not be getting her way.

She told me it must involve two of my body parts, any two or more, but it doesnt have to be anything specific.
Hands, elbows, knees, feet, chin and left elbow, right big toe and left nut, butt cheeks, penis and nose... Just try every combination of body parts until you get it right.

It would be in contact with a more sexual body part of hers typically, like boobs or ass, thighs, but doesnt HAVE to be.
Okay.

Every body part can be incorporated, its not specific.
Uh huh.

She says it can be done anywhere on the body, anytime.
Uh huh.

She says its not about WHAT Im doing so much as HOW I do it. She emphasized that strongly.
I see....

It often involves sex but also not necessary.
Hmm...

It can involve lifting her body.
Of course.

It is something passionate.
Something passionate that makes her feel degraded. Makes sense.

It can involve squeezing.
As do most things when you use two body parts.

It can be painful but doesnt have to be.
So can taxes.

It involves NO items or clothing.
Literally only involves your body parts and hers.

Things I know it ISNT because she said so:
Spanking, talking dirty, pinching, biting, scratching, rough sex, constriction , nothing with sex specifically or oral or anything.

If any of you guys could PLEASE help Id appreciate it, I really want to find out but she cant tell me or else it ruins it for her!

Once you break it down the answer is really quite obvious.

She wants you to use your Jedi mind tricks to make her feel extremely degraded while you intimately give her a Swedish deep tissue massage with any two parts of your body while bench pressing her.

Was that really so hard to figure out?

Nahh I'm totally kidding. She's gotta tell you. Unless she thinks tickling is an intimate thing that often leads to sex (which for some people I guess it can) then I have absolutely no freaking idea.

 

[unowned73]

It sounds like the only desire she really has is driving you crazy.

Amen.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Sounds like it could be a fun and rousing evening of 21 kinky questions and a learning experience as long as you BOTH enjoy it. Maybe enjoy the process of discovery and each take turns asking questions. Learn something. Gain something. Be safe, but PLEASE have fun. If you lose patience, consider another less popular but equally fun game called 'I've Got A Paddle, Let's Play Confession.' It could work.

ETA: My guess is a body shot of some sort. Not everyone likes citrus, so squeeze optional.

 

[midwestyankee]

That comment doesn't really take mind reading, considering where I live.

Shhhhh...you'll give away my secret and my fortune telling business will go all to hell.

 

[Netzach]

Uhhh....what have I got in my pocket????

Seriously, this is a hell of a riddle. I can't begin to guess.

I think it's fine if she's telling you what her needs are, but right now you have a better idea of what they're not. But is it bigger than a breadbox?

Maybe she's trying to goad you into just taking control..."I have no idea, so here's what we're doing." But I would NOT assume that, either.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Hello, I am posting here because Im trying to figure out this huge turn on and fantasy of my girl, and I figure since I know it involves her being submissive and me being dominant some of you folks might know, but she won't tell me. I have to figure it out.

Here is what I know:

She says by telling me it would take a lot of the pleasure out of it for her. Its something I have to be into for her to like it.

It goes against how she is, she normally likes getting what she wants, being a leader, hates being degraded or disrespected. Its something degrading and submissive.

She told me it must involve two of my body parts, any two or more, but it doesnt have to be anything specific.

It would be in contact with a more sexual body part of hers typically, like boobs or ass, thighs, but doesnt HAVE to be.

Every body part can be incorporated, its not specific.

She says it can be done anywhere on the body, anytime.

She says its not about WHAT Im doing so much as HOW I do it. She emphasized that strongly.

It often involves sex but also not necessary.

It can involve lifting her body.

It is something passionate.

It can involve squeezing.

It can be painful but doesnt have to be.

It involves NO items or clothing.

Things I know it ISNT because she said so:
Spanking, talking dirty, pinching, biting, scratching, rough sex, constriction , nothing with sex specifically or oral or anything.

If any of you guys could PLEASE help Id appreciate it, I really want to find out but she cant tell me or else it ruins it for her!

Recruit a dominant man for her, you come across as a poser twat.

 

[unregistered]

 

[subwannabe]

I'm with the others. She should just tell you. She doesn't have to go into giant detail but she has to give you more to work with than this. She needs to give you a rough outline and then you can try taking it from there. However, if you have to play games then this is my advice:

Tie her up spread eagled on the bed and tease her mercilessly for as long as it takes. Keep her in a constant state of horniness and wetness. It is better than truth serum. She will tell you everything you want to know but it is important to know that she will probably hold back so after she thinks she has told you enough to placate you, continue teasing her, demanding that she tells you even more. Do it several times until she has told you every dirty fantasy that has ever popped into her head.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

The begged question is, why should poser man give a shit what she wants? This sorta nonsense is why this board is ridiculous. Can you imagine George Patton asking his men, WHAT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY, PUMPKIN?

 

[IrisAlthea]

It sounds like the only desire she really has is driving you crazy.

Yup, either that or she wants you to jump through hoops.
Maybe both.