victorious
Really Experienced
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- Feb 5, 2012
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Little update and sad news
- Thread starter victorious
- Start date
simplegirl
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Apr 8, 2007
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- 381
She sounds like a very unstable woman, nevertheless she's responsible for her own actions. Be glad you're getting out of that toxic situation.
Doog_kuron
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- May 25, 2013
- Posts
- 673
Echo these sentiments. Clearly sanity took an extended vacation and crazy came to stay. I wouldn't say its a cause for sadness but rather relief. Can you imagine how miserable your life would be if she was still in your life? Best of luck getting your life back on track.
GiggLeGasm
June Cleaver Wannabe
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2011
- Posts
- 22,811
From the history of your posts, this is not a new issue. Two years ago, she moved out. Last year, you were divorcing.
You can no longer blame your wife for this unstable relationship. Fires never happen spontaneously. It is ALWAYS the result of an interaction.
Be a big boy.. Own it.. Move on.. Don't.. but you can't blame her for your choices.
You can no longer blame your wife for this unstable relationship. Fires never happen spontaneously. It is ALWAYS the result of an interaction.
Be a big boy.. Own it.. Move on.. Don't.. but you can't blame her for your choices.
SweetErika
Fingers Crossed
- Joined
- Apr 27, 2004
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- 13,442
Just because she was arrested for/charged with felony DV doesn't mean she actually will be convicted of it. And depending on how things work in your jurisdiction, you may be able to request for the court to consider her history of mental instability, get her help with that and/or make sure she still has the option of returning to live out the rest of her life with her family in her country of origin.
Have you checked to see if her Asian country will allow her to return if she has a felony DV conviction on her record here? Some countries won't admit felons at all, whereas others bar those with certain felony drug or other convictions.
It's up to you of course, but it might be worth talking to the prosecutor of her case about pushing for a psych eval and/or helping her get home to her family, if you feel like that would be best for her as a human being.
I have to agree with GLG, though: you've had problems with your wife and she's been showing signs of illness for a long ass time now, so perhaps it's time to do what you would do with any potentially irrational/unstable person and only deal with her in a safe arena (e.g. a courtroom, police station, public place). It's not your fault that she threw the pot at you, but knowing about her irrational behavior/instability, why did you allow her to come to your home, and not quickly hand her the stuff in a safe public place or at a police station with an officer standing by? I know hindsight is 20/20, but perhaps there's some part of you that's feeding the drama and/or wants validation for the hell you feel your wife has subjected you to for all these years? Maybe it's time to take a look at that possibility and work on moving forward with a good therapist.
Have you checked to see if her Asian country will allow her to return if she has a felony DV conviction on her record here? Some countries won't admit felons at all, whereas others bar those with certain felony drug or other convictions.
It's up to you of course, but it might be worth talking to the prosecutor of her case about pushing for a psych eval and/or helping her get home to her family, if you feel like that would be best for her as a human being.
I have to agree with GLG, though: you've had problems with your wife and she's been showing signs of illness for a long ass time now, so perhaps it's time to do what you would do with any potentially irrational/unstable person and only deal with her in a safe arena (e.g. a courtroom, police station, public place). It's not your fault that she threw the pot at you, but knowing about her irrational behavior/instability, why did you allow her to come to your home, and not quickly hand her the stuff in a safe public place or at a police station with an officer standing by? I know hindsight is 20/20, but perhaps there's some part of you that's feeding the drama and/or wants validation for the hell you feel your wife has subjected you to for all these years? Maybe it's time to take a look at that possibility and work on moving forward with a good therapist.
Cumference
I brought my plunger!
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2014
- Posts
- 2,729
What citizenship does she have?
US or "Asian country"?
US or "Asian country"?
Harold_Hill
Really Really Experienced
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- Nov 9, 2014
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Apparently the OP deleted the original post, so I can't be really sure what his situation is; however, from reading the responses, apparently his wife threw a pot or something at him, and was arrested for domestic violence. Being arrested for domestic violence isn't always as serious as it may seem. With the laws today, if there is any kind fight in a domestic relationship, the police have to arrest somebody, whether it is justified or not. What I don't get, (if I understand the OP's situation), is what is the big deal if she threw a pot at him. Fifty or a hundred years ago, when a wife got mad, she threw things at her husband all the time. Back then men knew how to duck, and they also knew how to defuse the situation. If a wife got to far out of line, her husband would turn her over his knee and spank her butt until she decided to act like an adult. The point being, if his wife was going to act like a child, he would treat her like a child, and if she acted like an adult, he would treat her like an adult. What, are men just pussies today?
Bramblethorn
Sleep-deprived
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- Feb 16, 2012
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- 18,419
I'm not a divorce attorney but I'm pretty sure any of them would tell you that it actually isn't a great idea to give somebody grounds for an assault charge against you when you're in the middle of divorce proceedings. Or indeed at any other time.
