Not sleeping with the Farmer's Daughter

sirhugs

Riding to the Rescue
Joined
Jan 25, 2002
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probably been done, but up for a new twist dept...

the classic intro:

travelling salesman's car breaks down, he is picked up by the farmer who notes the hour, the only garage nearby will be closed for the night. so farmer offers to take salesman to farm, feed him, in morning tow the car to the garage. "But there's only twoo bedrooms, and I sleep in one and my daughter sleeps in the other, so you'll hafta sleep in the barn.

salesman agrees- what else can he do?

Dinner is served by the daughter & salesman can see why Farmer is worried- daughter must be barely 18, is built like a pinup girl, dressed in worn cutoff jeans and an old flannel shirt tied below her ample bosom, which is obviously unrestrained by any bra.

After supper, salesman offers to help with the washing up, as a way to watch daughter move, which makes him horny & hard. He hopes daughter will show him to the barn.

Just then car lights pull up in the yard.

Daughter says "Oh, that's my Ma, home from church- she'll show you to the barn...."

suppose it could be brother, or grandma, or....

or what else could be done to make this old set up fresh?
 
or what else could be done to make this old set up fresh?

Traveling salesman is female. Or transsexual. Or transhuman.

The barn is haunted, hungry, horrific, or infested with tarantulas.

The farmer's daughter is an anthropology major studying salesmen.

The farmer is a taxidermist specializing in traveling salesmen.

Newly-arrived ma or grandma is a former stripper & madam.

Newly-arrived 'brother' is undergoing gender reassignment.

Previous traveling salesmen are in cages under the barn.
 
The daughter is hot and interested. He's interested in the farmer.
Same scenario, but with female salesperson.

OR

Salesperson of any gender. Farmer and daughter are both interested, and competing. Salesperson is not interested in either, but does fancy a certain bovine in the barn.

OR

Salesperson and farmer (and/or daughter) compete for barnyard bovine.

Of course, this being LIT, humans may not consummate with the bovine, not unless it's a super-bovine with GMO-enhanced intelligence and a German accent. If it's an ordinary bovine, they can only fight and dream.
 
Same scenario, but with female salesperson.

OR

Salesperson of any gender. Farmer and daughter are both interested, and competing. Salesperson is not interested in either, but does fancy a certain bovine in the barn.

OR

Salesperson and farmer (and/or daughter) compete for barnyard bovine.

Of course, this being LIT, humans may not consummate with the bovine, not unless it's a super-bovine with GMO-enhanced intelligence and a German accent. If it's an ordinary bovine, they can only fight and dream.

Moo Moo, I love you.
I know you're a cow but anything will do
Oooh weee, can't you see, I wanna make love to you!
 
Moo Moo, I love you.
I know you're a cow but anything will do
Oooh weee, can't you see, I wanna make love to you!

That reminds me of a few of my titles+openings that I can't develop on LIT:
HOME ON THE RANGE - I'd been out here too long -- the sheep were looking enticing.
LOST IN THE JUNGLE - Professor Czolgosz did his best to suppress his immense but doomed attraction for Lila, the matriarch of the orangutans. He knew he was just not worthy of her love.
SEX AND THE SINGLE SQUIRREL - Wow, that chipmunk gal is a babe! Look at all those tits!
HONKY TONK CHIMPANZEES - I knew I was doomed when Bertha blew me her simian kiss.
WHERE THE BUFFALO ROAM - She could dream of nothing else for weeks after seeing the bull's immense schlong.

And of course there's Norman Greenbaum's (SPIRIT IN THE SKY) classic song MILK COW. But that's G-rated.
 
it could be made into a romance story the salesman is a young single man and the famer's

daughter is also single and during his brief stay a romance could begin between the two of them.
 
it could be made into a romance story the salesman is a young single man and the famer's

daughter is also single and during his brief stay a romance could begin between the two of them.

If you want romance: the farmer's daughter is a single mother, maybe unwed or widowed or abandoned, and now living on the family farm. Her kid(s) and the sales(wo)man strike up a rapport. But s/he's a TRAVELING salesperson -- how can s/he be motivated to give up the road for farm life?

Or turn it into an Xmas / nativity metaphor. The salesman is Joe; the daughter is terminally-pregnant Mary Ann. Her folks (or father, if he's a widower) show Joe where to sleep in the barn and turn in early. Lonely Mary comes out to visit Joe, goes into sudden labor, and he must deliver, pronto! (He fortunately took medic training in the National Guard and knows how.) Cattle low, sheep baa, chickens cackle, the wind plays a melody in the barn rafters, a meteor lights the sky, etc. Joe is overcome by emotion and pledges to stay. Cue the violins.

Or, it's not too late for a Hallowe'en entry: Salesperson goes to sleep in barn, dreams of goblins and pumpkins, and awakens being smothered by daughter's pumpkin-size breasts. Somehow, romance ensues -- think of something. ;)
 
Of course, this being LIT, humans may not consummate with the bovine, not unless it's a super-bovine with GMO-enhanced intelligence and a German accent. If it's an ordinary
bovine, they can only fight and dream.

The "cow" is two guys in a suit. They're there on a surveillance mission, so they can't break cover.
 
Hypoixa : jobs can come and jobs can go but the love of a wonderful woman comes only once in a lifetime.
 
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THe Farmer and his daughter are Indians, not the feather headress kind, the Taj Mahal kind. They revere cows, but need to blend in with the other ranchers and sell meat. So traveling salesman are sold to the local butcher...

Traveling salesmen is asleep in the barn when he is awolen by 2 or 3 Amazonian woman who take him and sell him into the sex trade.

Traveling salesman didn't realize he traveled through a time portal, and farmers daughter is his great grandmother. If he doesn't sleep with her, his grandmother is never born and neither is he...

After spending the night with the farmers daughter he continues his travels and when he stops for lunch he talks about the farm and hospitality and is told that farm burned down during the 1930's and the farmer and his daughter died.


Farm is an FBI sting operation and salesman stunbles into the operatins center where he learns a shadow war between ISIS and US forces in going on in secret...or instead of ISIS, demons or aliens

Farm is actually a cult commune or marijuana grower, gun smuggler, and salesman is really a ATF/DEA agent who tries to keep the Daughter out of trouble... Or if a period piece farm could be a stop on the underground railroad and salesman could be a slave trader, bounty hunter or abolitionist.
 
I'm glad I'm not the only one here with a fertile, twisted mind.
 
Non-consent/Reluctance - Nothing happens during the night but the Farmer thinks something did. The Farmer then sexually assaults the Salesman in a fit of paranoia.

BDSM - Salesman seduces daughter: asks her to show him the horse riding gear, he proceeds to use straps & etc. to dominate her.

1st Time - Young Salesman is shown around the farm by the daughter. She shows him how they are breeding animals, he is embarrassed, she gives him handjob. He confesses his virginity, erotic hijinx ensue.

Mature - Lonely Old Farmer's Widow helps Salesman. Unsure of whether it is pity, compassion or the desire of a beautiful soul, the Salesman falls in love with the Widow.

Interracial - Salesman goes overseas and gets jungle fever. xD

Erotic Horror - Salesman goes to farm . Charms the family until he turns violent after rejection. Hunts down each family member. Salesman wasn't a salesman, just an psychopath escapee inmate. Police arrive to save last family member.

Group - Team of Salesman & Saleswomen stay the night. After dinner (which has a strange taste in the milk) they all retire to the barn. They can't help themselves, hijinx ensue.
 
Group - Team of Salesman & Saleswomen stay the night. After dinner (which has a strange taste in the milk) they all retire to the barn. They can't help themselves, hijinx ensue.

A week later they're horrifed to see a video of their antics for sale on "Barnorgy.com"
 
THe Farmer and his daughter are Indians, not the feather headress kind, the Taj Mahal kind. They revere cows, but need to blend in with the other ranchers and sell meat. So traveling salesman are sold to the local butcher...

Traveling salesmen is asleep in the barn when he is awolen by 2 or 3 Amazonian woman who take him and sell him into the sex trade.

Traveling salesman didn't realize he traveled through a time portal, and farmers daughter is his great grandmother. If he doesn't sleep with her, his grandmother is never born and neither is he...

After spending the night with the farmers daughter he continues his travels and when he stops for lunch he talks about the farm and hospitality and is told that farm burned down during the 1930's and the farmer and his daughter died.


Farm is an FBI sting operation and salesman stunbles into the operatins center where he learns a shadow war between ISIS and US forces in going on in secret...or instead of ISIS, demons or aliens

Farm is actually a cult commune or marijuana grower, gun smuggler, and salesman is really a ATF/DEA agent who tries to keep the Daughter out of trouble... Or if a period piece farm could be a stop on the underground railroad and salesman could be a slave trader, bounty hunter or abolitionist.

Has anyone ever said you have a strange imagination? If so don't listen to them. :devil:

Please write a story with where the Farmer has a Methlab, Pot Plantation and/or & 'shroom garden.
 
Has anyone ever said you have a strange imagination? If so don't listen to them. :devil:

Please write a story with where the Farmer has a Methlab, Pot Plantation and/or & 'shroom garden.

Due to my personal experiences with illegal drugs (Uncle with a 5K a day crack habit, and cousin born addicted to crack among other things) I will not write about drug use, unless it is a dru dealer being horribly tortured and killed. I am violently anti drug, to the point where I feel drug dealers should be treated like most people feel pediophiles should be.
 
The farmer and his family cook him a nice meal, give him a nice room for the night and are very gracious, but there's a catch... the salesmen has to have sex with the farmer and his wife.

I'm leaving out the daughter in my idea, but of course it could be a mom/daughter threesome or an entire family affair.
 
The farmer and his family cook him a nice meal, give him a nice room for the night and are very gracious, but there's a catch... the salesmen has to have sex with the farmer and his wife.

I'm leaving out the daughter in my idea, but of course it could be a mom/daughter threesome or an entire family affair.

Small town in the back hills of (insert favorite hillbilly state here) has kept themselves away from outsiders for so long that everyone is related and birth defects are becoming too common and the community is dying.

In order to keep their lifestyle viable they need fresh DNA. The men set traps for people passing by and "show up" to rescue them. They bring them to the village and hold a feast in the new comers honor.

Then the individual is brought to one of the village woman who is normal, and fertile at that time. The individual is forced to have sex while the entire village observes. He must keep going for days or weeks until the woman is preggers.

If the subject is female, she is forced to sleep with one of the village men until she is preggers, than kept until she gives birth. Once they village has used them, the outsiders are (feasted upon, released with a wild story no one believes, lobotomized, held for future use etc...)
 
what if its the farmer's daughters older sister?

or her sexy Aunt?
 
Or the farmer is banging the daughter and when the sales man sneaks into the room Orgy...
 
The salesperson goes to the barn, only to be awakened by a scratching noise and then hears the door open. He then sees a figure come in only to discover that the figure is dropping straw as it goes and is wearing shabby hand-me-downs:

Goosebumps XXX: The Scarecrow Fucks at Midnight
 
What if instead of a salesman the leading man is a military man? like a Navy SEAL or an Army Ranger or a Marine.

And instead of having sex with the farmers daughter a romance develops between him and the farmers daughter.

I like romance stories very much and their is potential for a romance story in this story idea.
 
Whatever happens in the barn is told from the POVs of animals housed there, so it's a Thurberian or Orwellian sardonic / ironic metaphor. I envisage something spun from the Jack B. Quick tales in Alan Moore's TOMORROW STORIES comix crossed with ANIMAL FARM and THE UNICORN IN THE GARDEN.
 
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