Females Are Bizarre.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

So the old lady takes me out to lunch yesterday, to a chicken place that just opened.

I don't know what she was thinking but the meal was the same shit KFC, CHURCH'S, and all the other chicken places sell, and it cost twice as much as the chicken the deli sells.

She was disappointed. No shit. Its fried chicken with a roll and slaw and a Coke. We coulda had two 12" subs piled with meat for the same money. Or gone to the Chinese Buffet.

I warned her. I ate their chicken at a Tampa franchise. Its OK like all the others are OK. And they fucked up both orders....so I swapped her my slaw for her roll and traded a piece of my chicken for one of hers.

I do not get her OCD about chicken.

She's female.

 

[DesEsseintes]

She's female.

Perhaps the briefest tautology I've ever read. Fine work.

 

[subdued_passion]

Perhaps the briefest tautology I've ever read. Fine work.

This would've been funny before the gender spectrum became a real thing.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

This would've been funny before the gender spectrum became a real thing.

There is no spectrum, there's one or the other and the poor souls with Napoleon complexes who believe theyre God or Jesus or whomever they imagine. Imagining youre a girl is the same as imagining youre Jesus.

 

[warrior queen]

If you believe this outing was about the chicken, then you REALLY have your work cut out trying to understand females.

 

[bronzeage]

So the old lady takes me out to lunch yesterday, to a chicken place that just opened.

I don't know what she was thinking but the meal was the same shit KFC, CHURCH'S, and all the other chicken places sell, and it cost twice as much as the chicken the deli sells.

She was disappointed. No shit. Its fried chicken with a roll and slaw and a Coke. We coulda had two 12" subs piled with meat for the same money. Or gone to the Chinese Buffet.

I warned her. I ate their chicken at a Tampa franchise. Its OK like all the others are OK. And they fucked up both orders....so I swapped her my slaw for her roll and traded a piece of my chicken for one of hers.

I do not get her OCD about chicken.

She's female.

There is a lot you don't get, but if this is the worst it ever gets, do you think you could live with it?

 

[subdued_passion]

There is no spectrum, there's one or the other and the poor souls with Napoleon complexes who believe theyre God or Jesus or whomever they imagine. Imagining youre a girl is the same as imagining youre Jesus.

No one seems to mind all those people imagining they're Elvis in Vegas!

If you believe this outing was about the chicken, then you REALLY have your work cut out trying to understand females.

Are you implying that JBJ has no clue about the weemenz?

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

No one seems to mind all those people imagining they're Elvis in Vegas!




Are you implying that JBJ has no clue about the weemenz?

The chicken sucked and cost too much. I get it. She has shit for brains. Today she says the idea was nutty. It was. She thought fried chicken and slaw and fries are different. That Coca Cola is different, different places. Its a common psychotic thought disorder. It cant be explained away rationally. Angels and unicorns are essential for it to make sense.

 

[subdued_passion]

The chicken sucked and cost too much. I get it. She has shit for brains. Today she says the idea was nutty. It was. She thought fried chicken and slaw and fries are different. That Coca Cola is different, different places. Its a common psychotic thought disorder. It cant be explained away rationally. Angels and unicorns are essential for it to make sense.

I've noticed that when people want a novel experience they usually don't stray too far from their comfort zone.

It was probably not so much about the food as it is about trying her comfort food at a new place.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

On one occasion a local school sent me a boy to assess. The referral form was vague about the nature of his problem. So he and mom sat in my office as I talked to the boy. I was stumped. He seemed OK to me.

So I asked mom about his problem, and she barked at him... TELL THE MAN!

The boys YOURE THE ONE THATS CRAZY, and they quarreled for several minutes about who was crazy.

So I called TIME OUT and appealed to mom to give me an idea about his problem. And she replied HE DONT BELIEVE NUTHIN I SAY.

Why I ask? The boys replied, CUZ SHE'S CRAZY.

And she blurts out, HE DONT BELIEVE I'M HAVING ELVIS' BABY!

 

[subdued_passion]

Presley or Costello?

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I've noticed that when people want a novel experience they usually don't stray too far from their comfort zone.

It was probably not so much about the food as it is about trying her comfort food at a new place.

Its not a new place. It was a Burger King 30 years ago, and ARBYS until recently. They remodeled it and changed the corporate sponsor. Its fast food. No! She's nuts.

 

[subdued_passion]

Its not a new place. It was a Burger King 30 years ago, and ARBYS until recently. They remodeled it and changed the corporate sponsor. Its fast food. No! She's nuts.

They say that couples who've been together for a long time tend to act and even look alike after a while.

So yeah, she is most likely nuts.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Presley or Costello?

Presley. He was dead 10 years at the time.

 

[Balladeer08]

There is no spectrum, there's one or the other and the poor souls with Napoleon complexes who believe theyre God or Jesus or whomever they imagine. Imagining youre a girl is the same as imagining youre Jesus.

Hallelujah!!!

 

[Balladeer08]

Presley or Costello?

Excellent question, same one I had.

Gets right to the heart of the matter.

What a faux pas it would be if you bought the baby little blue suede shoes, and it was Costello's!