Masturbation Policy

[patientlee]

Maybe this one's made the rounds already, but it's one of those things that make you go hmm.

http://marlomc.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/masturbation-notice.jpg?w=500&h=373

 

[patientlee]

Someone should just invent a drain for college dorms. I think that's more likely to fix the problem than asking college guys to masturbate in their own rooms.

 

[patientlee]

Or install these in the men's rooms.

http://img.scoop.it/_zG3JPPI7NxoP24zZjJu64XXXL4j3HpexhjNOf_P3YmryPKwJ94QGRtDb3Sbc6KY

 

[VenusButterflies]

It's educational.

 

[StrangeLife]

Or install these in the men's rooms.

http://img.scoop.it/_zG3JPPI7NxoP24zZjJu64XXXL4j3HpexhjNOf_P3YmryPKwJ94QGRtDb3Sbc6KY

I don't read japanese. What if the sign actually says "SEX Change Vending Machine?" The last thing you hear as man could be: *whirrr....snip!*

 

[Privates1stClass]

And i thought it was tampons and maxi-pads that were backing up the plumbing.

Perhaps they should just let the girls visit the guy's rooms more often.

 

[Swilly]

Do you think anyone went to the RA with questions? What would they be?

 

[AMoveableBeast]

Talk about "sticking" it to the man...

 

[pacifist91w]

I read only a little Mandarin

I don't read japanese. What if the sign actually says "SEX Change Vending Machine?" The last thing you hear as man could be: *whirrr....snip!*

I don't know a lot of the kanji on that sign, but enough to know that it's some form of Chinese--probably Mandarin, but maybe Cantonese. There's no hiragana, which is a dead giveaway that the sign is not Japanese. In any case, I don't want to try to translate the whole sign, but you need not fear sudden...medical procedures! It seems to be what it looks like!

 

[patientlee]

Do you think anyone went to the RA with questions? What would they be?

Ooh. Plot bunny. I knew there was one here somewhere. I just found it.

Thanks, Swilly.

 

[sr71plt]

I don't know a lot of the kanji on that sign, but enough to know that it's some form of Chinese--probably Mandarin, but maybe Cantonese. There's no hiragana, which is a dead giveaway that the sign is not Japanese. In any case, I don't want to try to translate the whole sign, but you need not fear sudden...medical procedures! It seems to be what it looks like!

It's Chinese (the "written" language is just Chinese. Mandarin and Cantonese are different spoken dialects--both keyed to the one "written" language).

 

[Serafina1210]

The UMASS sign is a prank played several years ago. Also at UMICH and other places. A good joke!

But seriously, boyz, you've got to stop all this masturbating at Literotica. You're plugging up the Intertubez.

 

[patientlee]

The UMASS sign is a prank played several years ago. Also at UMICH and other places. A good joke!

But seriously, boyz, you've got to stop all this masturbating at Literotica. You're plugging up the Intertubez.

It smacked of prank, but it is funny anyway. Must have been a prank on the RAs.

 

[StrangeLife]

It's Chinese (the "written" language is just Chinese. Mandarin and Cantonese are different spoken dialects--both keyed to the one "written" language).

I see. So that's why I couldn't read it.

But seriously, boyz, you've got to stop all this masturbating at Literotica. You're plugging up the Intertubez.

It ain't our fault that them lazy girlz don't put out enough...

 

[lovecraft68]

That reminds me of the time my nephew stayed with us for a couple of weeks one summer. He was about seventeen and one night my wife comes up to me and says.

"You need to talk to him. There was some white stuff on the wall of the shower and I thought it was shampoo and wiped it off with my fingers, guess what it was?"

I couldn't help thinking it was a pretty big shower and that was some distance.

 

[StrangeLife]

"You need to talk to him. There was some white stuff on the wall of the shower and I thought it was shampoo and wiped it off with my fingers, guess what it was?"

My first question would be: "And how exactly did you go about identifying said substance?"

 

[lovecraft68]

My first question would be: "And how exactly did you go about identifying said substance?"

I know the whole thing screams plot bunny.

She says she could tell by the feel. When I brought it up he turned enough shades of red to tell me she was right(I let him off the hook some and said I found it.....which might have left him wondering how I....)

 

[patientlee]

I know the whole thing screams plot bunny.

She says she could tell by the feel. When I brought it up he turned enough shades of red to tell me she was right(I let him off the hook some and said I found it.....which might have left him wondering how I....)

I would think that Mrs. Lovecraft has a little bit of experience with the substance.

 

[Hypoxia]

Taste test, of course.

 

[Swilly]

Takes mold and mildew right out of the grout.

 

[JKendallDane]

The hell with clogging the pipes! That's the least of the worries.

Scroll down and read the first review of cases of Kleenex found on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/Kleenex-Facial-Tissue-Count-Pack/dp/B00B9OYLC4

 

[49greg]

The hell with clogging the pipes! That's the least of the worries.

Scroll down and read the first review of cases of Kleenex found on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/Kleenex-Facial-Tissue-Count-Pack/dp/B00B9OYLC4

That is soooo very funny. Makes me wonder if my Mom ever wondered why my socks were so crusty. When I was home from college one summer she was buying some kleenex tissues that were 'made for men', extra big and extra thick. She always got the bright red ones for some reason.

I used them up very quickly and had to mumble some excuse about allergies. Then to punish me for lying I eventually did develop allergies at certain times of the year.

I wish they still made those big tissues. The regular ones aren't big enough so I use paper towels. For blowing my nose all yea with dirty minds. I still have the occasional crusty sock though.

 

[Serafina1210]

Scroll down and read the first review of cases of Kleenex found on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/Kleenex-Facial-Tissue-Count-Pack/dp/B00B9OYLC4

Love it. Thanks.

 

[patientlee]

The hell with clogging the pipes! That's the least of the worries.

Scroll down and read the first review of cases of Kleenex found on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/Kleenex-Facial-Tissue-Count-Pack/dp/B00B9OYLC4

Warning label please. I was eating peas when I started reading that.

 

[FantasyXY]

The story here is...

What can you get away with using stolen letterhead...

When I was in college we pulled these sorts of pranks almost constantly. For the prank that was the most successful, we had to steal blank sheets printed with the actual University letterhead. At the time, all official university correspondence had printed, not copied, letterhead on a page with the university logo watermark on the paper. Using that paper made everything we put out look "official".