Wasn't expecting that!

[Gunnlaug]

I teach English in Poland and I often go out to companies to teach Business English or give conversation lessons. Yesterday I went to a favourite group at a marketing company. One of the group met me at reception and sorted out a room for us. Then she went to get me coffee, etc. The rest of the group were still finishing emails or whatever.

Anyway, my first student comes back with the coffee and tells me that she is just going to get her pen, bottle of water, go to the toilet, then the lesson can begin. This student is a particular favourite of mine - very cute, about 28, but nothing doing because I'm married and I wouldn't fuck my paycheque even if I was single. Anyway, the subsequent conversation went something like this;

Me - You can't go to the toilet, you have to sit down.

Std looks confused - what do you mean?

Me - I haven't given you permission. You have to sit down.

Std sits - But I need to go.

Me - I don't care. You must do what you are told. Anyway, you haven't said the safe word.

Std - what safe word?

Me - You don't know the safe word ?! Oh dear, that's unfortunate! You have to do what I tell you unless you say the safe word.

Std looks confused but stays sitting and starts twisting uncomfortably on chair, clearly needing to dash to the toilet.

At this point I couldn't continue any more and I burst out laughing. I couldn't believe it - this woman is sassy and doesn't take crap from people. I was expecting her to tell me to fuck off and leave the room to do what she needed to do. I think this site might be having a bad effect on me

 

[Hypoxia]

Yes, you have been corrupted. Yes, you are a bad boy. Have you bought padded handcuffs yet?

 

[Gunnlaug]

Yes, you have been corrupted. Yes, you are a bad boy. Have you bought padded handcuffs yet?

Padded? Doesn't that detract from the fun?

 

[TxRad]

Padded? Doesn't that detract from the fun?

No, it extends the fun. Less chaffing.

 

[3113]

What a sad little story

Poor woman. Lost in the language, taken advantage of by her teacher, punked for no better reason than to amuse him and get him off a little, and, unaware of the S&M relationship he was creating, not even given the chance to consent to it and decide if she could have any enjoyment from it. And laughed at.

Very sad.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Poor woman. Lost in the language, taken advantage of by her teacher, punked for no better reason than to amuse him and get him off a little, and, unaware of the S&M relationship he was creating, not even given the chance to consent to it and decide if she could have any enjoyment from it. And laughed at.

Very sad.

Yeah, I'm afraid I found this more creepy than funny :-/

 

[sr71plt]

Hmmm. I thought I was the only one who thought that. (And of course, if I'd said so, there'd be a gaggle of posters razzing me about it.)

 

[Gunnlaug]

Poor woman. Lost in the language, taken advantage of by her teacher, punked for no better reason than to amuse him and get him off a little, and, unaware of the S&M relationship he was creating, not even given the chance to consent to it and decide if she could have any enjoyment from it. And laughed at.

Very sad.

Her English is superb. Not quite fluent but extremely close. And to be honest I expected her to tell me to take a running jump on my first comment - which she has before over other crap I've said to her. And for the record, she isn't slow about coming out with the punk comments herself.

 

[sr71plt]

Well, yes, but you see, I found your posting contradictory. You said you wouldn't fuck your paycheck and immediately laid out a story of sexual harassment (invoking BSDM concepts). I'm pretty sure that would fuck your paycheck in the U.S. university I work with if she decided to report you.

 

[PennLady]

Yeah, I'm afraid I found this more creepy than funny :-/

Hmmm. I thought I was the only one who thought that. (And of course, if I'd said so, there'd be a gaggle of posters razzing me about it.)

Well count me in as well. I didn't think it was funny at all. It seemed very mean.

 

[SikFuk]

Creepy and mean, but inadvertent. If the OP had known he was being creepy and mean, I don't think he would have done it. Definitely too much time in the BDSM forum.

 

[xelliebabex]

Creepy and mean, but inadvertent. If the OP had known he was being creepy and mean, I don't think he would have done it. Definitely too much time in the BDSM forum.

Yeah I agree with SikFuk, gosh in context it probably was funny (it wasn't my sort of humor but we are not all the same) and he hardly let it go on very long. I doubt his intention was to be mean but more razz her, as he said he didn't expect her to do as he said in the first place and it wouldn't have gone past that, if she had have given as good as she got, as the OP said she had done in the past.

 

[sr71plt]

That may go across in a Polish university, but it wouldn't in an American one. He'd be playing with fire to have any sort of understanding like this (or so he thought) with a woman student. He would be completely at her mercy--and it's only worse if he's married--at losing his paycheck no matter what she chose to report about the relationship, if she chose to deep six him. But maybe in Poland . . .

So, inadvertent or not, he's setting himself up--or would be in the U.S. equivalent. And to be so unaware as to post about it . . .

 

[lovecraft68]

And you just risked your "paycheque" by acting like a dirty pervert with one of your students.

And despite what someone else suggested stay the hell away from the BDSm forum. BDSM already has a bad enough rap, we don't need any more help from idiots who think the words "sir" and "permission" make you anything more then the fucktard you are.

Hope your student wises up and goes over your head.

 

[lovecraft68]

Yeah I agree with SikFuk, gosh in context it probably was funny (it wasn't my sort of humor but we are not all the same) and he hardly let it go on very long. I doubt his intention was to be mean but more razz her, as he said he didn't expect her to do as he said in the first place and it wouldn't have gone past that, if she had have given as good as she got, as the OP said she had done in the past.

Inadvertent my ass. He's a teacher who's job is to work with young men and women. Acting like that was so unprofessional its ridiculous.

Serioulsy let's forget even about creepy and perverted right now and get to gross incompetence. This girl goes to the dean or whoever is over his head with this he no longer has a job.

Nor does he deserve one.

 

[lovecraft68]

Padded? Doesn't that detract from the fun?

You'll find out when you get arrested.

 

[Trixareforkids]

Political correctness is ruining human interaction...

I can't believe the HARD PC line that so many people take now. He didn't proposition her. He was teasing. He was expecting it to be banter and it turned out to be a punk. People, in general, don't expect this kind of banter and teasing from someone they don't know or don't expect to share/play back.

I had a boss come out on a balcony at an off-site office celebration, put his arm around me, look down and say "wanna fuck". I laughed, smacked him and gave him a cigarette because I knew that's what he'd come out for. The "wanna fuck" was part of a story he told us about a contractor's husband.

Lots of "inappropriate" things get said in work places every single day. It's only inappropriate if you know the person will be offended or if you don't know the person well enough to tell.

For me it always comes down to tone. Yeah there were a few guys that I knew would jump at a chance if presented with it, but they never PUSHED. I think that all the PC stuff is a joke. Those that NEED it will never HEED it and it clouds the judgement of the rest.

 

[PennLady]

For me it always comes down to tone. Yeah there were a few guys that I knew would jump at a chance if presented with it, but they never PUSHED. I think that all the PC stuff is a joke. Those that NEED it will never HEED it and it clouds the judgement of the rest.

Actually I had no issues with any political correctness. I just didn't think it was funny. Once it was clear the woman didn't get it and had already said she needed a bathroom, I think it stopped being funny. I get that it wasn't on purpose, and that's fine, it's basically a no harm, no foul situation.

I just didn't find it funny.

 

[Trixareforkids]

Actually I had no issues with any political correctness. I just didn't think it was funny. Once it was clear the woman didn't get it and had already said she needed a bathroom, I think it stopped being funny. I get that it wasn't on purpose, and that's fine, it's basically a no harm, no foul situation.

I just didn't find it funny.

I didn't find the specific exchange amusing either. I did see the humor in the situation, his surprise at both his own and her reactions.

My comment refers more to those who feel he could or should be fired. Gross incompetence? Since when is banter gone awry gross incompetence? Because this had the feel of BDSM to some it suddenly becomes a horrible disgusting incident? Really, so anytime anyone in a workplace exerts control over a meeting it's BDSM and disgusting and the person in charge should be fired? Because to me it's not a stretch to go from the incident described to to what I described. I've sat in many a meeting doing the pee pee dance when given a signal to wait a moment. That was also someone exerting control over me and when I could relieve myself and THEY were NOT joking and had I NOT heeded their gestured command I would have felt repercussions of some sort for it. THAT is abuse of power and it happens every day. Again, to me, tone and intent are everything.

 

[LWulf]

I think he didn't mean it as "ha-ha" funny but "ironic" funny, or maybe a piquantly humorous situation. Whimsical? One of those...

Definitely a sad trombone moment

 

[Swilly]

It smells phony to me. Just saying.

 

[patientlee]

It smells phony to me. Just saying.

That's what I thought too.

 

[LWulf]

I have seen and personally experienced things that many would think came right out of a male driven fantasy story. "That doesn't happen in real life" moments that actually happened.

It doesn't mean they really don't happen.

The woman dressed in white who doesn't wear a slip and goes into the office and as the sun sets, everyone sees everything transparently.

The playful minx that notices you glanced at her tush, then looks at her own tush, wiggles it then looks up at you and wiggles her eyebrows. (That's happened at least 3 or 4 times to me in different situations and different ladies with different outcomes (not all were her wiggling her tush, yet still playful))

I could write a book about all the things that look like they could only happen in a book.

Does it happen every day? Heck no, but that doesn't mean they don't ever happen.

I could see myself in the OP's position and that happening.

 

[sr71plt]

Actually I had no issues with any political correctness.

It's not political correctness when you are a male instructor standing in front of the desk of your department dean and the dean is waving a sexual harassment report from a coed in your face. What sort of bubble do some of you folks live in?

Again, if this was in the United States, if that description is accurate, this is not a case of political incorrectness; it's a case of inappropriate, actionable faculty behavior that's now at the mercy of a student. And if it's a student the faculty member already is sharing innuendo with, it's a firecracker waiting to be exploded--at the control of the student.

 

[Trixareforkids]

It's not political correctness when you are a male instructor standing in front of the desk of your department dean and the dean is waving a sexual harassment report from a coed in your face. What sort of bubble do some of you folks live in?

Again, if this was in the United States, if that description is accurate, this is not a case of political incorrectness; it's a case of inappropriate, actionable faculty behavior that's now at the mercy of a student. And if it's a student the faculty member already is sharing innuendo with, it's a firecracker waiting to be exploded--at the control of the student.

Again that "inappropriate" word. Hop on over to the thread I started with that topic and let's discuss it there.