K
KalIsBack
Guest
I think she needs to leave...
I think....
- Thread starter BBWangeleyes
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Touch_72
Incorrigible Flirt
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- Aug 26, 2013
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I can picture this in a skit a la Monty Python...
Officer: Good evening, ma'am. I'll need to see... your driver's license, registration, proof of insurance, birth certificate and/or green card, social security card, proof of medical insurance, any paperwork for any firearms within your vehicle, and... last but not least... your notarized proof of sexual activity...
Lady: Here you go, Officer.
Officer: Thank you! Now, the reason I stopped you today is you were doing 56 miles per hour in a 45 zone... but, hang on a second here... this does NOT appear to be a valid officially notarized proof of sexual activity.
Lady: Huh?
Officer: Have you had sex, ma'am?
Lady: Of course I have!
Officer: Then where is your officially notarized proof of sexual activity?
Lady: Right there!
Officer: But, this is a condom!
Lady: Well, it's filled, isn't it? And it has my DNA on it, so there you go!
Officer (holding it carefully by fingertips): Aha! But, it's neither official, nor notarized...
Lady: Notarized?
Officer: There is no embossed stamp on this... ummm... so called proof of your sexual activity.
Lady: (rolls eyes)
Officer: That's it. I'm going to need to write you a ticket for speeding...
Lady: Oh, get on with it.
Officer: ...BUT, arrest you for celibacy.
Lady: I AM NOT A VIRGIN! Oh give me your damn finger... there's no hymen in there... (grabs his hand and wrestles it between her legs in frustration)
Officer: Aha! BUT, it's not notarized!
Lady: Oh, fuck off with your stamped notarized officiality...
may_I_please
Literotica Guru
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I think its rare that responses amuse and surprise me to that extent *applause*
MsLead
Literotica Guru
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*bows* I just let John Cleese's voice do the talking. I transcribed what he said in my head. That shit came out.
I think your shit smells like roses
Touch_72
Incorrigible Flirt
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MsLead
Literotica Guru
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your bum and shit are on the airwaves sir....everyone gets a sniff as they pass by.............(laughing uncontrollably)
jameslewis
Literotica Guru
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- Nov 4, 2013
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I think my neighbor caught me. I was online with a lady from lit when the neighbor came over to ask me to help her with a heavy box in her car. I was barely put together when I answered the door and probably pretty flushed too. The way she looked at me i think she had it figured out.
Touch_72
Incorrigible Flirt
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MsLead
Literotica Guru
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Actually, my bum is. That's true.
I think you are an excellent comedian and a good sport...(((bow before you)))
Loving50
Literotica Guru
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- Dec 24, 2013
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I think I should move the coffee maker so it's bedside.
howboutdat
Really Experienced
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- Feb 21, 2008
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I think the beach next week sounds darlin. I think I won't go north of tarpon. I think I've tried. I don't think I failed. I think you will see you are wrong.
a few years back we had a thunderstorm while it snowed...it was the weirdest weather I'd ever seen....
jack80
Hail to the King!
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- Jan 16, 2012
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I think it is hard to think of anything else, when thoughts of her enter my mind, her sweet smell, her beautiful spirit, pretty face, sensual grace, and smile that fills my heart...
I think canbe4fun sets the bar high!!
T
Twlightdreamer
Guest
I think it is hard to think of anything else, when thoughts of her enter my mind, her sweet smell, her beautiful spirit, pretty face, sensual grace, and smile that fills my heart...
Ahhhhhhh.....
Hrm? What? Other men exist?
I think today is going to be an odd day.
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snugglestruggle
...
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- Oct 1, 2011
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I think there are some strange people sending me even stranger emails . WTF? lol
Canbe4fun
justa guy
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- Nov 16, 2009
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I think that was really nice to say, i appreciate that Jack...
sereneone4u
quod nutrit me destruit
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- Sep 7, 2006
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I love your quote!
I think people might think you are female and that is why you are getting strange emails?
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