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So I've been looking through the bible, in order to avoid working, trying to find a description for Jesus. So far, nothing. I'll keep you posted. I have to plug up my Nook.
 
Once-ler said:
This thread took a weird turn...
Click to expand...

Well, it started off poorly with a white trash Aussie who didn't understand the article she linked, was followed by many people who didn't bother reading said article and then Jesus got drug into it as is usually the case.
 
Once-ler said:
So I've been looking through the bible, in order to avoid working, trying to find a description for Jesus. So far, nothing. I'll keep you posted. I have to plug up my Nook.
Click to expand...

You're not going to find one. Did you think nobody else in history had ever thought of that?
 
KRCummings said:
You're not going to find one. Did you think nobody else in history had ever thought of that?
Click to expand...

Nobody else in history has not wanted to go fix their broken down house, take their accounting midterm, or avoid talking to their family nearly as bad as I do. And if they see me sitting here reading the bible they're way less likely to bitch at me to do something then if they see me sitting here quilting- which is what I was doing.
 
In Revelation 1:13 it says he has wooly white hair. That's after he died and came back though- that shit would turn anybody's hair white.
 
"The hair on his head was white like wool, as white as snow, and his eyes were like blazing fire. His feet were like bronze glowing in a furnace, and his voice was like the sound of rushing waters."

And he had a sunburn, apparently.
 
HOLY FUCK JESUS CAN DEEP THROAT SWORDS! That's literally the next line, is that he reaches into his mouth and pulls out that flaming sword. I had forgotten about that. That is cool as shit.
 
Set it to random and I got this.

"Thou art fairer than the children of men; Grace is poured into thy lips: Therefore God hath blessed thee for ever. Gird thy sword upon thy thigh, O mighty one, Thy glory and thy majesty. And in thy majesty ride on prosperously, Because of truth and meekness and righteousness: And thy right hand shall teach thee terrible things. Thine arrows are sharp; The peoples fall under thee; [They are] in the heart of the king's enemies. Thy throne, O God, is for ever and ever: A sceptre of equity is the sceptre of thy kingdom. Thou hast loved righteousness, and hated wickedness: Therefore God, thy God, hath anointed thee With the oil of gladness above thy fellows. All thy garments [smell of] myrrh, and aloes, [and] cassia; Out of ivory palaces stringed instruments have made thee glad."

...wtf did I just read? Out of context this sounds like whoever is in Psalms is totally trying to get god to fuck him.
 
Alright, that's enough bible class today. We've learned that though we might not know exactly what Jesus looked like, he had white hair, glowing bronze skin, and was hot as hell. Now I'm hungry.
 
Once-ler said:
Set it to random and I got this.

"Thou art fairer than the children of men; Grace is poured into thy lips: Therefore God hath blessed thee for ever. Gird thy sword upon thy thigh, O mighty one, Thy glory and thy majesty. And in thy majesty ride on prosperously, Because of truth and meekness and righteousness: And thy right hand shall teach thee terrible things. Thine arrows are sharp; The peoples fall under thee; [They are] in the heart of the king's enemies. Thy throne, O God, is for ever and ever: A sceptre of equity is the sceptre of thy kingdom. Thou hast loved righteousness, and hated wickedness: Therefore God, thy God, hath anointed thee With the oil of gladness above thy fellows. All thy garments [smell of] myrrh, and aloes, [and] cassia; Out of ivory palaces stringed instruments have made thee glad."

...wtf did I just read? Out of context this sounds like whoever is in Psalms is totally trying to get god to fuck him.
Click to expand...

Psalms are poems and probably written by David. Taken as that they make perfect sense. Taken out of context or as some sort of historical narrative then of course they don't.
 
KRCummings said:
Psalms are poems and probably written by David. Taken as that they make perfect sense. Taken out of context or as some sort of historical narrative then of course they don't.
Click to expand...

That's the point of the game. It works with nearly every book. It's way funnier when you're high. This makes me sad... because it reminds me that I'm not high.
 
So can faggots have kids or not.

The way I see it is if they can the kids wouldn't really be human.

If you make a person from skin its just moving talking skin. It doesn't have a soul so it isn't human and you could have a different set of rights for them. Kinda like robots.
 
chillywilly2 said:
So can faggots have kids or not.

The way I see it is if they can the kids wouldn't really be human.

If you make a person from skin its just moving talking skin. It doesn't have a soul so it isn't human and you could have a different set of rights for them. Kinda like robots.
Click to expand...

Quoted for lack of humanity.
 
chillywilly2 said:
So can faggots have kids or not.

The way I see it is if they can the kids wouldn't really be human.

If you make a person from skin its just moving talking skin. It doesn't have a soul so it isn't human and you could have a different set of rights for them. Kinda like robots.
Click to expand...

Whoa.
 
chillywilly2 said:
So can faggots have kids or not.

The way I see it is if they can the kids wouldn't really be human.

If you make a person from skin its just moving talking skin. It doesn't have a soul so it isn't human and you could have a different set of rights for them. Kinda like robots.
Click to expand...

Is this the part where Cookie comes in and kisses your ass for being such a good little homophobic bigot? Or did that happen when you stated that why would anyone want to be a Native American?

God, so hard to keep up.
 
chillywilly2 said:
So can faggots have kids or not.

The way I see it is if they can the kids wouldn't really be human.

If you make a person from skin its just moving talking skin. It doesn't have a soul so it isn't human and you could have a different set of rights for them. Kinda like robots.
Click to expand...

I suppose we own him a debt of gratitude, for gathering all the world's stupid into one easy-to-access place.
 
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