2 lesbians

[Sam37]

(this joke is NOT PC. If you are easily offended, kindly exit my thread immediately)

2 lesbians decide to drive from Florida to California.

At the same time, 2 homosexuals decide to make the same trip.

Which car arrives in California first?































The 2 lesbians. They were going lickety-split while the homosexuals were still packing their shit.

 

[killallhippies]

it isn't offensive. it's just stupid.

 

[Sam37]

Elderly couple on a cruise

An elderly couple decides to take a cruise for their 50th wedding anniversary. On the way to the cruise terminal, the batteries in the wife's hearing aides died. They were running late, so they decided to make the best of it.

They get their cabin assignment, and discover that instead of a king size bed they were given bunk beds. They contact Guest Services, but the ship is booked and there are no more cabins. Once again, they decide to make the best of it.

They spend the first day attending various fun activities and enjoying the fine food on the ship. Finally they return to their cabin. The husband points to the top bunk and then the bottom bunk and says, "UP or DOWN?"

The wife rips off her clothes and makes wild, passionate love to him. They haven't had it this good in YEARS.

The next day is much the same, and at the end of the evening the husband asks the same question: "UP or DOWN?"

Once again, the wife rips off her clothes and makes wild, passionate love to him.

This continues throughout the rest of the week. Every time he asks which bunk she wants, she attacks him. He is in HEAVEN. The cruise has rejuvenated their sex life, and he feels closer to his wife than ever before.

Sadly, the cruise came to an end. they debark and collect their luggage. As they are driving home, the husband sees a Walgreen's Pharmacy and pulls in to buy replacement hearing aid batteries for his lovely bride.

As soon as the batteries are installed, the wife says, "I WANT A DIVORCE!"

"What? Baby, we just had the best week of our marriage. We've been closer this week than we have in years. Every night you initiated sex like in the old days. What's wrong, honey?"

"All week long, you've threatened me."

Husband, "What do you mean? I never threatened you!"

Wife, "Yes you did. You kept telling me to 'Fuck or drown'!"

 

[RoryN]

2 lesbians decide to drive from Florida to California.

At the same time, 2 homosexuals decide to make the same trip.

Which car arrives in California first?

The 2 lesbians. They were going lickety-split while the homosexuals were still packing their shit.

Haha - stupid lesbians and gays.

Fixed your post...

 

[Sam37]

it isn't offensive. it's just stupid.

Glad you got it!

 

[dolf]

when does it get funny?

 

[killallhippies]

never.

 

[mark197205]

when does it get funny?

I was wondering the same thing.

 

[Sam37]

Who promised you "funny"?

Exactly how much did you pay for admission to this show?

Yet you're still disappointed?


HAHAHAHAHAHahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa............

 

[Sam37]

Fixed your post...

Yeah, uh, NO.

You take yourself far too seriously.

And you truly do not comprehend the art of the "groaner".

 

[blobfish]

It wasn't bad enough to be a groaner, yet not funny enough to be funny.

 

[RoryN]

Who promised you "funny"?

this joke

Joke
joke/jōk/

Noun:

A thing that someone says to cause amusement or laughter, esp. a story with a funny punchline.

Source: Google

Fail.

 

[Sam37]

Again, you missed the entire point.

Since it's too difficult for you to comprehend, I'll explain for the others in the audience: The joke is on YOU. I'm the one laughing. :-D

Even funnier is your inability to follow directions.

 

[islandman]

Again, you missed the entire point.

Since it's too difficult for you to comprehend, I'll explain for the others in the audience: The joke is on YOU. I'm the one laughing. :-D

Okay, now we're all laughing.

At you.

 

[Sam37]

Success!

 

[RoryN]

I'm going to pretend I won.

That's what we wanted you to do.

 

[December]

As a hysterical joke? Not funny.
As a groaner? Totally worked.

/shrug