How do fat people wipe their ass?

[Very_Bad_Man]

You ever wonder?

I never did till yesterday I saw this really fat guy who had abnormally short arms. He reminded me of a walrus.

 

[Peregrinator]

http://www.neatorama.com/2009/06/13/comfort-wipe-extension-arm-to-wipe-your-behind/

 

[KRCummings]

http://www.neatorama.com/2009/06/13/comfort-wipe-extension-arm-to-wipe-your-behind/

I've seen that before. It's the second greatest commercial of all time.
This one is the greatest.

 

[Peregrinator]

I've seen that before. It's the second greatest commercial of all time.
This one is the greatest.

I didn't even watch the video. That popped up when I googled "sumo wrestlers wipe ass."

I've known people who have been to those cleansing retreats. They always talk about the huge fecaliths they pass. It sounds disturbing.

 

[blunt_trauma]

wow... such enthusiasm for shitting.

 

[IndieSnob]

One cheek at a time. Just like putting on your pants on one leg at a time.

 

[Very_Bad_Man]

wow... such enthusiasm for shitting.

Shit is spewed verbosely all over the GB so it is fitting.

 

[thør]

Pressure washer?

 

[unregistered]

 

[warrior queen]

Here in Oz, there's a toilet seat you can buy that retrofits to any existing toilet and works like a bidet... wash and air dry.
Apparently, sales to obese people means the company is doing well enough to list on the stock exchange next month.

Personally, I'm wary of having anything that connects to 240 volts THAT close to my cunt while having a pee.
Thankfully, I fall far short of obese, and don't need it.

But I might just go and buy some shares in the company.....

 

[eyer]

How do fat people wipe their ass?

What do you think God gave midgets tongues for?

BTW:

...here's a handiwipe.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

They usta come to the hospital with shit caked on them like old grass caked on a lawn mower. A hose and a pressure nozzle gets most of it off. Excellent fertilizer for the flowers.

 

[blunt_trauma]

you guys titter but when/if you get to 90, you've got arthritic shoulders, you struggle to keep yourself clean and have the indignity of having to ask for help? i'm thinking it won't be quite so funny.

 

[warrior queen]

you guys titter but when/if you get to 90, you've got arthritic shoulders, you struggle to keep yourself clean and have the indignity of having to ask for help? i'm thinking it won't be quite so funny.

My mum is an aged care worker.
I have a contingency plan.
As a DIRECT result of the stories she comes home with.

 

[oggbashan]

My mum is an aged care worker.
I have a contingency plan.
As a DIRECT result of the stories she comes home with.

My contingency plan is to cross the road and walk into the sea.

I hope that it is high tide. It's a long walk if the tide is out.

Seriously - my father was in a local care home for ten years. I visited him frequently. It made it easier for him and the staff that his care needs were minimal because he was physically fit, just forgetful. He would slip out of the home two or three times a day and go for a walk. At first the staff tried to follow him but he walked too fast and too far, averaging 12-15 miles a day.

He would forget if he had had breakfast but if he insisted the staff would give him a second one - he was using more calories than any three of the other residents.

He was popular with the staff because he was unfailingly polite. He would stand up whenever a woman entered the room, even if it was the cleaner. He used to open doors for 'ladies' (anyone female). Women's Lib changed him slightly so that he would open doors for men and women.

His past career had included mass catering so he used to 'inspect' the home's kitchens every week. If he found anything wrong he wouldn't draw attention to it at once but ask the person responsible or doing something wrong for 'a quiet word' outside the kitchen. Then he would explain not what was wrong but how it should be done. While he was there all the staff passed their catering and hygiene courses with high marks. The kitchen received the highest marking possible from the health inspectors.

During his stay the home, in conjunction with the visiting doctor, managed to reduce the medications he was on from 30 pills a day to none by providing him with meals that avoided triggers for his type 2 diabetes and other conditions. I believe they kept him alive and active for at least 5 years longer than he might have lived in another establishment.

Ten years after his death I recently met one of the staff. She made a point of reminding me that he was still missed and that the kitchen staff still told each other "He wouldn't have approved of that...".

There are care homes that provide good care. Unfortunately they cost more than most.

 

[Very_Bad_Man]

Bidet must of been invented with fat and old people in mind.

 

[pink]

I have always wanted a bidet for that fresh feeling.

 

[sweepthefloor]

I had a young overweight male patient once walk up to the nurses station to tell me he just took a crap and wanted me to come and wipe his ass with hot soapy water.

I said: How do you wipe yourself at home?
He said: I have a scrubber on a stick at home.
I said: Maybe you should call your wife and ask her to bring the scrubber on a stick in for the next time. OK?

I was busy and outraged, but I still wiped his ass with hot soapy water.

 

[Very_Bad_Man]

I had a young overweight male patient once walk up to the nurses station to tell me he just took a crap and wanted me to come and wipe his ass with hot soapy water.

I said: How do you wipe yourself at home?
He said: I have a scrubber on a stick at home.
I said: Maybe you should call your wife and ask her to bring the scrubber on a stick in for the next time. OK?

I was busy and outraged, but I still wiped his ass with hot soapy water.

The day I can't wipe my own ass is when I take a long walk off a short pier excluding a temporary medical incapacity.

 

[AngeloMichael]

http://www.pattayadailynews.com/en/2011/04/01/obese-man-fused-to-recliner-for-two-years/

 

[blunt_trauma]

I was busy and outraged, but I still wiped his ass with hot soapy water.

i tsk in your general direction, young lady!

 

[oggbashan]

The day I can't wipe my own ass is when I take a long walk off a short pier excluding a temporary medical incapacity.

Some years ago, one of my wife's cousins was knocked off her bicycle and broke both her arms.

She could live with the pain and inconvenience, but having to ask her comparatively new boyfriend to wipe her ass upset her, even though he didn't take advantage of her helplessness.

He moved in to her flat until she was able to use her arms again. Then he went back to his own flat to let her live independently again.

It was no surprise when they became engaged and married.

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

Some years ago, one of my wife's cousins was knocked off her bicycle and broke both her arms.

She could live with the pain and inconvenience, but having to ask her comparatively new boyfriend to wipe her ass upset her, even though he didn't take advantage of her helplessness.

He moved in to her flat until she was able to use her arms again. Then he went back to his own flat to let her live independently again.

It was no surprise when they became engaged and married.

As a child, while drying up as she washed the dishes, I asked her "how will I know I'm in love?" - she answered "if he would do the most embarrassing tasks for you with no hesitation and you would do the same for him." it worked!

 

[piccicatopolka]

I know a plumber who HATES fat people; especially women. He is so tired of unclogging their messes and telling them that they may have to flush three times during the process.

 

[sweepthefloor]

i tsk in your general direction, young lady!

It was ridiculous--