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Isolated Blurts - The HT Cafe Way

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Quoll said:
If it's any consolation (actually it's fucking terrifying) my wife has gone back to school and the "adults" are still doing all the above, which is such a help when you get to the group exercises. Also the "I'm so glad you asked what that meant, I had no idea." That's silly but understandable in a child, but stupid and quite possibly negligent in an adult.
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I teach "adults." :(
bailadora said:
"We also offer vaginal rejuvenation."
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What's up with this? Seems like we're too hairy, too floppy, not pink enough, not wet enough, too wet, yadda, yadda, yadda. :rolleyes:
 
Eilan said:
What's up with this? Seems like we're too hairy, too floppy, not pink enough, not wet enough, too wet, yadda, yadda, yadda. :rolleyes:
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I know, right? It's a wonder that women can get men to pay any attention to them at all.

(that was sarcasm)
 
Quoll said:
Apparently (sing along) Nothing could be finer than to have a Designer Vagina in the morning.
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*nods* I'm saving up my pennies for a Calvin Krotch, or a Dolce and Gabonbon.


What do Vegan zombies eat?

Gra-a-ains. :D
 
Went to bed at midnight only to be woken by my lil guy who commenced almost 2 hours of getting sick to his stomach. He's been asleep for 30 minutes now...HOPING we are done of the night. Of course, I'm WIDE AWAKE now.
 
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YankeeGirl74 said:
Went to bed at midnight only to be woken by my lil guy who commenced almost 2 hours of getting sick to his stomach. He's been asleep for 30 minutes now...HOPING we are done of the night. Of course, I'm WIDE AWAKE now.
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Yuck. Hope your little one feels better soon--and here's hoping that YOU don't get sick! :)
 
This last page of posts has been both disturbing and hilarious.

Where is the procedure for penile rejuvenation? Fair's fair.

In keeping with the concept of the blurt as we know it...

I could do what I did over the weekend every single week and never get bored with it. :D
 
bobsgirl said:
This last page of posts has been both disturbing and hilarious.

Where is the procedure for penile rejuvenation? Fair's fair.

In keeping with the concept of the blurt as we know it...

I could do what I did over the weekend every single week and never get bored with it. :D
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Well I suspect the Brits could have a Bespoken Poken.
Or maybe a Personalised Pudding Poker.

Wishing is good time wasted,
Still it's a habit they say;
Wishing for sweets I've tasted,
That's all I do all day.
Maybe there's nothing in wishing,
But speaking of wishing I'll say:

Nothing could be finer than to be in your vagina in the morning,
No one could be sweeter than my sweetie when I eat her in the morning.
Where the morning glories
Writhe around the floor,
Whispering pretty stories
I long to hear once more.
Eating out my girlie where the dew is pearly early in the morning,
Butterflies all flutter up and kiss each little buttercup at dawning,
If I had Aladdin's lamp for only a day,
I'd make a wish and here's what I'd say:
Nothing could be finer than to be in your vagina in the morning.

Reaming was meant for nighttime,
I love to ream all the day;
I know it's not the right time,
But still I ream away.
What could be sweeter than reaming,
Just reaming and drifting away.

Nothing could be finer than to be in your vagina in the morning,
No one could be sweeter than my sweetie when I eat her in the morning.
Where the morning glories
Writhe around the floor,
Whispering pretty stories
I long to hear once more.
Eating out my girlie where the dew is pearly early in the morning,
Butterflies all flutter up and kiss each little buttercup at dawning,
If I had Aladdin's lamp for only a day,
I'd make a wish and here's what I'd say:
Nothing could be finer than to be in your vagina in the morning.
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Q-man...all I got is "wow"

I've been sent to North Western PA on business for a week. It's day 2. I'm alternately irritated by the lack of organization and support from my company for what I've been sent here to do, and bored out of my mind.

I always thought business trips were supposed to be fun. :(
 
Saucyminx said:
I've been sent to North Western PA on business for a week. It's day 2. I'm alternately irritated by the lack of organization and support from my company for what I've been sent here to do, and bored out of my mind.

I always thought business trips were supposed to be fun. :(
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Do you at least have a company charge card, if so drain that mini bar dry, hit the nudie clubs, okay, that's pretty much all I've got, my only business trips are the 350 odd km I do every second night, no mini bars or nudie clubs and totally the wrong sort of wildlife.

I hope things either improve or you get so plastered you can forget.

Smooches muchly because I've been a dick about answering PMs.:kiss::kiss:
 
Quoll said:
Do you at least have a company charge card, if so drain that mini bar dry, hit the nudie clubs, okay, that's pretty much all I've got, my only business trips are the 350 odd km I do every second night, no mini bars or nudie clubs and totally the wrong sort of wildlife.

I hope things either improve or you get so plastered you can forget.

Smooches muchly because I've been a dick about answering PMs.:kiss::kiss:
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It is on the company card, but there is no mini bar, or fridge in the room, and i have not seen a single strip club since I got up here. Plenty of ammo stores, and beer distributors and tons of signs for Elk crossings.

I'm boring--i don't drink much when I'm out by myself. I did make myself go out to dinner, and played 2 games of pool in the bar I had dinner in. Won too. :)
 
bailadora said:
Snippet from a radio ad by a local plastic surgeon: "We also offer vaginal rejuvenation."

WTF? Seriously? :eek:

That's a no knife zone, thank you very much!
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Maybe there is no knife involved. Maybe their vaginal rejuvenation is offered only to men.
 
mynameisben said:
Maybe there is no knife involved. Maybe their vaginal rejuvenation is offered only to men.
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Scapel, laser - same difference. Tissue in that area is getting cut. I'm convinced it's just another form of snake oil used to con women into believing their bodies aren't good enough. FFS, most of the time the woman's partner is the one who gets the benies, while she gets the pain and the potential nerve damage. :eek::rolleyes:

Vaginal rejuvenation surgery is supposed to improve a person's sex life and some people that have had the surgery are very pleased with the results and others less so. Some physicians argue that a tighter vagina will not make a woman’s sex life better if it was not all right to begin with. In fact often it is the woman's sexual partner who notices a difference and not the patient of the surgery.

Vaginal rejuvenation surgery is very risky because an incision in this area involves cutting nerves and this can result in less sensation and a great deal of scarring. There are not many nerve endings located in the vagina and having vagina rejuvenation surgery can sever nerve endings that can lead to a permanent loss of sensation and scar tissue that can also affect the sensations in the vaginal area. An increase in friction is one advantage of this type of procedure but often the woman is not the one who gets to experience any additional pleasure.
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Source. Whatever happened to good ole fashioned Kegels?
 
I realized recently that tripe is sold with a "best before" date. Consider the implications.
 
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