Trying to teach the chicklet to cook.

[warrior queen]

It isn't going well.
First, we attempted double choc brownies. Need 2 eggs. When she dropped them whole into the flour mix, I knew we were in trouble.
Next, we tried banana-yoghurt loaf. Need 2 mashed bananas. Has anyone else here tried to mash bananas with a teaspoon?
We've just started cooking the rice for fried rice dinner. Need to pre-wash the rice. Chicklet somehow thinks that means using washing up liquid.

I am in kitchen hell.

 

[lovetoread]

lmao, that's how I was when I started cooking.

 

[Aquagal]

It isn't going well.
First, we attempted double choc brownies. Need 2 eggs. When she dropped them whole into the flour mix, I knew we were in trouble.
Next, we tried banana-yoghurt loaf. Need 2 mashed bananas. Has anyone else here tried to mash bananas with a teaspoon?
We've just started cooking the rice for fried rice dinner. Need to pre-wash the rice. Chicklet somehow thinks that means using washing up liquid.

I am in kitchen hell.

Washing the rice really made me laugh! I had friends once that thought their rice came out too sticky, so they decided to wash it after it was cooked.

 

[pointless]

well, it's a tiny piece of mediocre gum. frankly, i'm amazed that it managed to be of any help at all.

 

[CandiCame]

Wow... I don't remember not being able to cook. I was in a "learn or die" situation though. If I had done something like that, someone would have beat the shit out of me. Dishwashing liquid in rice...

I started baking, I remember, around the time my mom was preggers with my brother and we had moved back in with my grandparents. I never could get the 'egg white' thing down, I'd always get bits of shell in it and get completely bitched out and eventually kicked out of the kitchen. That shit is hard for a three year-old, the way you gotta balance it between the egg halves or whatever. To this day, I'm like, "Fuck that shit. Colesterol. You only live once."

 

[warrior queen]

The chicklet wants to help me julienne veges for the fried rice.
I am afraid to let her near a knife!

Thing is, in less than 4 months, she's going to be a mum herself.
And she really seriously doesn't know the basics of cooking!
When my relationship ended, she was 11. And she stayed with her father. And her new step-bitch-mum hated her, so she never got to do any cooking.

 

[warrior queen]

Washing the rice really made me laugh! I had friends once that thought their rice came out too sticky, so they decided to wash it after it was cooked.

For some recipes, you do need to rinse the rice to stop the cooking process.
I make rice balls with blue cheese in the middle, and you need to stop the rice from cooking before you can form them.

 

[lovetoread]

That shit is hard for a three year-old, the way you gotta balance it between the egg halves or whatever. To this day, I'm like, "Fuck that shit. Colesterol. You only live once."

You should have had that mastered at 3. Tsk, must have had a spoiled upbringing.

 

[TonyClifton]

Your recipes sound familiar.

Are you related to Julia Child?

 

[Bert Notorius]

Fried rice is made with day old rice.

 

[Paendragon]

Wait, how old is she? I was laughing already thinking she was a young 'un.

 

[warrior queen]

Your recipes sound familiar.

Are you related to Julia Child?

No. I just really love cooking.
But I am being sorely tested today.
Right now, the chicklet is swearing at the vegetable peeler, because it won't work the way she wants it to.

 

[warrior queen]

Fried rice is made with day old rice.

Or, if you're lucky like me, you can make the rice in the morning, spread it out in a single layer on a tray, and stick it into the blast freezer for 15 minutes.
Transfer to fridge, and voila! you're ready to go 6 hrs later

 

[warrior queen]

Wait, how old is she? I was laughing already thinking she was a young 'un.

The chicklet is 17.
She's had zero interest in cooking before, but now.... well, she kinda has to do a speed-cooking course.

 

[Paendragon]

The chicklet is 17.
She's had zero interest in cooking before, but now.... well, she kinda has to do a speed-cooking course.

And she just threw the whole egg right in there, huh?

Hah. Good luck.

 

[Aquagal]

For some recipes, you do need to rinse the rice to stop the cooking process.
I make rice balls with blue cheese in the middle, and you need to stop the rice from cooking before you can form them.

No, they were trying to rinse the sticky off after it was cooked. It was like mush. They were WELL into adulthood.

 

[Aquagal]

And she just threw the whole egg right in there, huh?

Hah. Good luck.

Maybe she was trying a Scottish egg?

 

[warrior queen]

And she just threw the whole egg right in there, huh?

Hah. Good luck.

Not only that, I am trying to teach her to drive.
This is a girl who thinks car keys are a cool fashion accessory, but would be much nicer if they came in pink

 

[Paendragon]

Maybe she was trying a Scottish egg?

Interesting theory. Perhaps she is a prodigy, and is bored with the easy stuff.

Not only that, I am trying to teach her to drive.
This is a girl who thinks car keys are a cool fashion accessory, but would be much nicer if they came in pink

Ahaha! Priceless.

 

[o_so_wet]

If you know how to cook...why don't you just do it yourself ??

 

[fgarvb1]

LOL!

I started learning how to cook around age six helping out my mom.

Both my parents held the viewpoint that boys should know how to get through life on their own if they had to.

Served me well several times too.



.

 

[CandiCame]

You should have had that mastered at 3. Tsk, must have had a spoiled upbringing.

I did. I was a really spoiled kid. I'm living like a spoiled kid right now. My grandpa never had much money growing up, so once they got that coal money he was like, "I shall dress my brood in finery! And get them anything they want! Even stupid shit! Fear me, people who made fun of me for being poor!"

I had a 64, PSX, and a Dreamcast. I was one of, I don't know, 5 people who had a Dreamcast. I wore the clothes they bought for me- in my town that meant a lot- they bought me a car, a computer, I would check my bank account all the time and they would randomly have put hundred of dollars in there... You know how the retarded gov custody thing works. It would be like, "Live with my mom, be in poverty"- 6 months later, "move back to grandparents, get flatscreen TV, PS2, laptop, and car".

In my defense over the egg thing, before that, my cooking skills were limited to TV dinners and cereal. It was basically "unwrap" "push buttons that match box" "nuke" "eat". Or, in some cases when I was really hungry just, "unwrap" "eat". I ate a lot of junk food to, because of that, because it was as simple as "unwrap" "eat". My teeth were fucked up because of it- like a lot of my baby teeth grew in wrong because I didn't have enough calcium or some shit. But I love to cook- I loved it then, and I love it now. I don't like frozen/processed stuff. I eat the meat I kill, I eat the veggies I grow, and I buy veggies and bread and stuff to. My onions are coming in like motherfuckers! Just throwing that out there, I pulled a bunch of them up today, because the stalks were like, 8in long or some shit. Omnomnom. Green onions.

I hate gardening, I just like to be pretentious.

The chicklet is 17.
She's had zero interest in cooking before, but now.... well, she kinda has to do a speed-cooking course.

Wait... 17? I don't care how much of a bitch her stepmom was- context clues. It sounds like she's just fucking with you because she doesn't really want to cook.

 

[warrior queen]

I did. I was a really spoiled kid. I'm living like a spoiled kid right now. My grandpa never had much money growing up, so once they got that coal money he was like, "I shall dress my brood in finery! And get them anything they want! Even stupid shit! Fear me, people who made fun of me for being poor!"

I had a 64, PSX, and a Dreamcast. I was one of, I don't know, 5 people who had a Dreamcast. I wore the clothes they bought for me- in my town that meant a lot- they bought me a car, a computer, I would check my bank account all the time and they would randomly have put hundred of dollars in there... You know how the retarded gov custody thing works. It would be like, "Live with my mom, be in poverty"- 6 months later, "move back to grandparents, get flatscreen TV, PS2, laptop, and car".

In my defense over the egg thing, before that, my cooking skills were limited to TV dinners and cereal. It was basically "unwrap" "push buttons that match box" "nuke" "eat". Or, in some cases when I was really hungry just, "unwrap" "eat". I ate a lot of junk food to, because of that, because it was as simple as "unwrap" "eat". My teeth were fucked up because of it- like a lot of my baby teeth grew in wrong because I didn't have enough calcium or some shit. But I love to cook- I loved it then, and I love it now. I don't like frozen/processed stuff. I eat the meat I kill, I eat the veggies I grow, and I buy veggies and bread and stuff to. My onions are coming in like motherfuckers! Just throwing that out there, I pulled a bunch of them up today, because the stalks were like, 8in long or some shit. Omnomnom. Green onions.

I hate gardening, I just like to be pretentious.





Wait... 17? I don't care how much of a bitch her stepmom was- context clues. It sounds like she's just fucking with you because she doesn't really want to cook.

Nope. She genuinely hasn't got a clue.
Prior to me leaving her father, I was a worker, and by the time I got home, the sitter/nanny had all kids fed, bathed and ready for bed.
After I left, her father didn't teach her, and once the step-bitch got there, she didn't teach either.
I had daughter with me for less than a year before she ran from home.
Now, she's pregnant, and needs to learn asap.

We just got back from a driving lesson (my first with her).
She didn't do too badly... especially given that all she has done till now is drive the driveway to the house.
There is hope!

 

[CandiCame]

Nope. She genuinely hasn't got a clue.
Prior to me leaving her father, I was a worker, and by the time I got home, the sitter/nanny had all kids fed, bathed and ready for bed.
After I left, her father didn't teach her, and once the step-bitch got there, she didn't teach either.
I had daughter with me for less than a year before she ran from home.
Now, she's pregnant, and needs to learn asap.

We just got back from a driving lesson (my first with her).
She didn't do too badly... especially given that all she has done till now is drive the driveway to the house.
There is hope!

I believe in you, WQ! You'll get her straitened out!

 

[warrior queen]

LOL!

I started learning how to cook around age six helping out my mom.

Both my parents held the viewpoint that boys should know how to get through life on their own if they had to.

Served me well several times too.



.

Both the no1son and the kidley bean (boys) know a lot more about cooking than the chicklet.
Once a week or so, they cook dinner for me.

No1son's gf is mightily impressed.