Different attractions of gay and bisexual men?

[Little Bird]

I don't know any gay men very well personally and talked to only a very few bisexual men, so this may all be just biased by my limited perception.

But I noticed that gay porn and erotica usually doesn't do anything for me. The one kind where I freequently find something I like, it's usually yaoi manga. Which are almost entirely written by women targeted at a female audience.

To say it plainly, almost all gay porn is a huge turn off for me. With all other combinations of men, women, and others, there's of course still a lot of junk, but also a lot that's quite okay or even fine. But gay porn is about the only thing where I take a look at the men and think "I really don't want to see this". On a lot of straight and bisexual porn however, the men are quite okay or occasionally even attractive.

So I was wondering. Is it really that gay men have such a strong preference to tall and muscular, and badly shaved and hairy men, or is it just that people are just targeting the lowest common denominator? And when you get something else they have pierced rongues and half a pack of gel in their hair, which also isn't for me.
No denying here, I do prefer men without pronounced masculinity, but if it was just that I would get as uncomfortable from straight porn as well. And since the few bisexual men I know of seem to have similar tastes, I was wondering if sexual orientation could be a reason.
I used to think that bisexual are half-gay people, but since I noticed my attraction to men, it seems like it's two completely different things.

 

[Phydeax69]

I'm attracted to cock, not men...weird, huh? I LOVE women, I love to LOOK at women, have sex with women, etc...but deep down, I also LOVE cock!...so I dig watching She-male porn...easy solution!

I doubt I'll ever encounter a "lady-boy" but the porn is there, and it's fun! In the meantime, if I can find another married and bi friend, I'd have some fun!

 

[dluvstoread]

Feel somewhat the same...............turned by very little gay porn but love the thought of being with another man.......and the wife and I sharing a man and his cock......but it's hard to find a fairly attractive not overly masculine man who is willing to let my wife and I blow him before he fucks her, that is not overbearing, sane, and full of himself.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Is it really that gay men have such a strong preference to tall and muscular, and badly shaved and hairy men, or is it just that people are just targeting the lowest common denominator?

Not the lowest common denominator, no. But certainly a common denominator. The guys you see in gay porn are just that-- guys. Gay men , to make a sweeping generalisation, are not looking for bishonen men-- that's a woman's desire for the most part (and if you want bishonen looks, check out any group of baby bulldykes dressed for a night out. Young princes all of them!).


The community of men who prefer men have developed a slightly difference aesthetic from the straight world, just as lesbian women have done. And it occurs to me that in both cases, the emphasis is more on what a person can do than what a person looks like-- lesbians and gay men both are a lot less perfectionist, in general, and more forgiving of physical imperfections. A lot of men are hairy. A lot of gay men are hairy. Why should they shave? That's only time spent not doing the good stuff

 

[sr71plt]

Men come in all varieties in gay male porn. You'll just have to trust me on this (or not, as you wish). I have more trouble finding bisexual visual material that turn me on. The women are almost always scaggy and the producers often appear to have been even less choosy in picking the men.

 

[dluvstoread]

I'd like to find some good bi-sexual porn also.......

 

[Hitchiker69]

From my point of view, when a person defines themselves primarily by their sexuality, they've gone off the deep end. I'm Bi, sexually, but that comes nowhere near defining me as a person. Similarly, my porn tastes tend towards normal healthy people enjoying each other sexually.
I don't care for ultra buff macho men wrestling, for example. Too gay. Or butch women. Both are too 'in your face.'
Just give me the girl or guy next door. Fairly normal, fairly attractive (OK, maybe more attractive than normal), healthy and horny, pleasuring each other.
On the other hand I have a weakness for trannies and fem boys. Go figure. I think it must be that I'm attracted to the blend/cross between genders...looking for the best of both in one....the holy grail.

 

[CandiCame]

I don't know any gay men very well personally and talked to only a very few bisexual men, so this may all be just biased by my limited perception.

But I noticed that gay porn and erotica usually doesn't do anything for me. The one kind where I freequently find something I like, it's usually yaoi manga. Which are almost entirely written by women targeted at a female audience.

To say it plainly, almost all gay porn is a huge turn off for me. With all other combinations of men, women, and others, there's of course still a lot of junk, but also a lot that's quite okay or even fine. But gay porn is about the only thing where I take a look at the men and think "I really don't want to see this". On a lot of straight and bisexual porn however, the men are quite okay or occasionally even attractive.

So I was wondering. Is it really that gay men have such a strong preference to tall and muscular, and badly shaved and hairy men, or is it just that people are just targeting the lowest common denominator? And when you get something else they have pierced rongues and half a pack of gel in their hair, which also isn't for me.
No denying here, I do prefer men without pronounced masculinity, but if it was just that I would get as uncomfortable from straight porn as well. And since the few bisexual men I know of seem to have similar tastes, I was wondering if sexual orientation could be a reason.
I used to think that bisexual are half-gay people, but since I noticed my attraction to men, it seems like it's two completely different things.

Couple of things

-I fucking LOVE Yaoi- and it is mostly a female thing. Writers, artists, audience. But, I DO draw Yaoi- and there are like, at least 5 other guys on the planet I'm pretty sure do. But I always have preferred Hentai over live-action porn. I think it's because I'm so submissive that S&M hentai can stretch farther then live-action stuff can.

-I'm not attracted to Bishoen guys. I am a bishoen guy, but I don't know if that has anything to do with it or not. I'm just saying that I'd fuck Jet over Spike. I like the "muscular" guys, but I hate body hair- but I do think that's just me. There are probably a balance in any sexuality- different folk like different traits. I guess it could be possible that men like more masculine traits, especially if we exude a lot of feminine energy- just to kinda balance things out. I don't know if it's true overall- just speaking for myself. That might also be an S&M thing, because I like a man to be able to break me in half if he needs to.

 

[Stella_Omega]

From my point of view, when a person defines themselves primarily by their sexuality, they've gone off the deep end. I'm Bi, sexually, but that comes nowhere near defining me as a person. Similarly, my porn tastes tend towards normal healthy people enjoying each other sexually.
I don't care for ultra buff macho men wrestling, for example. Too gay. Or butch women. Both are too 'in your face.'
Just give me the girl or guy next door. Fairly normal, fairly attractive (OK, maybe more attractive than normal), healthy and horny, pleasuring each other.
On the other hand I have a weakness for trannies and fem boys. Go figure. I think it must be that I'm attracted to the blend/cross between genders...looking for the best of both in one....the holy grail.

Some interesting thoughts there!

Personally, I'd rather be with a butch woman. The attitudes of femininity that trannies display don't attract me at all.

 

[Chrissi]

Men come in all varieties in gay male porn. You'll just have to trust me on this (or not, as you wish). I have more trouble finding bisexual visual material that turn me on. The women are almost always scaggy and the producers often appear to have been even less choosy in picking the men.

This is so true, and in real life too! I don't watch tons of porn, but when I do, it is exclusively gay porn, and I enjoy the variety of men. My bf is very hairy, as are a couple of our friends, they are all sexy in their own way. I am totally smooth, and we also have some friends who are like me, to a bit more hair. We have some slim friends and bear friends, and masculine friends, and jock friends, and femme friends...its all good as long as what is in their minds and hearts is good.

My preference is overwhelmingly the written word, and I have to say, sr71plt is one of the best writers of gay romance and erotica on Lit.

Topher

 

[Mikijl Dragon]

As long as there is not a big thick beard I am ok. Neatly trimmed is ok but a ZZ top beard is turn off.

 

[smoohtie7722]

I prefer to jack off to straight porn where the girl is getting face fucked until her eyes water and she gags. That way I can wish I was her.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I prefer to jack off to straight porn where the girl is getting face fucked until her eyes water and she gags. That way I can wish I was her.

You don't have to be "her" to get your throat reamed. A man's throat takes it the same as any woman's.

 

[PressNightly]

It's very rare that I find gay porn that really 'does it' for me, muscular men, and excessively hairy men just don't get my juices flowing. On top of that most gay porn is overlaid with the most annoyingly cheesy soundtracks. A lot of straight porn is the same way, it's way too in your face for me to really get into it.

When it comes to erotic lit, I feel much more at home, many of the stories are a little bit too out there for me, but there are far more of them that really touch that place in me that drives me nuts.... Sensual, engaging, and with a nod to being slightly taboo. I need more 'romance' (for lack of a better word) with my porn.

I've found a lot of lesbian porn that I love, stuff that's made for women by women, but even as it gets me hard it kinda lets me down, cause there's not a cock to be found anywhere! lol

 

[Stella_Omega]

I'll betcha most of that gay writing that you like so much is written by women. All of the porn you dislike? Is made by men.

And men have the money to keep making bad porn. Women don't have the money to make the good stuff.

 

[PressNightly]

Lol, I wouldn't be suprised! Is it too much to ask that my pornography makes at least a passable attempt to seduce me before commencing with the grunting, moaning and ball slapping?!?

Oh well. I've always found it fascinating, the whole group of women who are obsessed with gay sex. Major turn on for me to find one of those gals in real life lol.

Untill then I've always got my imagination, I can do it better than they can anyways. I might even try my hand at writing some stories of my own, I've been toying with the idea for a while now!

 

[none2_none2]

Some of these comments seem so strange to me. Plenty of these comments are so full of stereotypes.

As to the comments on body hair, that is partially based on hormones, racial background, family charastics, and (believe it or not) age. It is not strictly a masculine vs feminine division either. Guys of European, middle eastern, south Asian background are more likely to have an abundance of body hair than the typical African or Oriental ancestry. It isn't absolute, but it is a tendancy. Woman can have body hair too. Maybe it isn't as abundant, but in our culture women are pressured to conform to the "ideal". If you have ever seen pictures of transmen you can tell that genetics do play a strong role. Some develop a sizable amount of body hair, others do not. Thus body hair is not necessariy a sign of how much testostrone an individual has in their system.

As to aging, a good number of males have hair thin on their heads (not all obviously) while it grows a bit more on the back, shoulders, nose, ears. What is interesting is that some men loose some of their leg hair as they get older. I always wondered if wearing pants and socks over a long period of time plays some roll in that.

There are plenty of gays who love body hair, some that don't, some that are particular WHERE it is -- some like hairy chests, but consider hairy legs and/or butts a turn off. There is no one template from which gay men are molded. I also think it is a hoot the ones who commented about all this body hair in gay porn. That is right down silly. As someone who was turned on big time by body hair since I was 4.5 years old, most gay porn does not have an emphasis on body hair. Now certain genre of gay porn will -- for instance bear porn. However, think about it. Bear porn has older men. How many men in their late 30's through early 60's are going to be this weird ideal of a gender-neutral male?

Again, no two gay males are alike. Sure I like very masculine, muscular, hairy guys. However, I have very little interest in penises. I'd rather kiss a guy than mess with his cock. I simply accept that penises cum with the territory. Plus at some point you have to geuninely feel something for the individual behind the body part. You can j/o all you want to porn, but unless you are a hermit, at some point you are going to want something other than your screen, your hand and/or toys, and your body parts. At that point you realize that a decent, caring human being matters more than some bizzare, unnatural ideal of a man or woman on a screen. If that is considered going for the lowest common denominator, so be it.

Enjoy whatever porn you wish. Just realize that no two human beings are alike in their sexual interests. There is no "one" ideal for gay males anymore than there is for straight males, bi-males, or for that matter anything that women may desire to watch.

 

[artgorden]

You don't have to be "her" to get your throat reamed. A man's throat takes it the same as any woman's.

yes but i like the look on my my wife's face as she watches another woman getting the shit fucked outta her by a cock 3 time the size of mine

 

[Neonurotic]

I'll betcha most of that gay writing that you like so much is written by women. All of the porn you dislike? Is made by men.

And men have the money to keep making bad porn. Women don't have the money to make the good stuff.

True. I guess I'm more cerebral, it seems to me that female writers are able to express the emotional side of a story better than male writers. I've only read a few gay stories that were written by men that were a total turn on, physically and mentally, 2 are/were on Literotica written by carsonshepherd.

As far as what attracts my bi side, I'm choosier than I am for females. However, it's more of a like-like thing, in that he having a similar smooth, lean build and aesthetics as I do, this goes for gay porn for me as well.

Yaoi, hot.

 

[Queen_Vicki]

Hmmm interesting thread, and interesting views. Speaking from a female point of view it all comes down to preference, and what you are attracted too OP. I can understand completely why you feel this way, because as a female whenever I watch bi porn with women in it, to me most of it be "two gay guys fucking each other with a token female just jerking them off, or she's there to suck a dick while the other guy gets fucked" that's it. The female's don't get any attention she's just there to water it down.

In my honest opinion. I believe Bi porn should just be strictly a man and a she male maybe even two. Because obviously from what I seen the female serves no purpose to a bisexual male.

And I use to like bi porn.

 

[Little Bird]

I think of I kind of missed my central point when starting this thread. Getting the confusing details but forgetting the important part.

But could it be, that homosexual people "on average" - for whatever that means - have stronger attractions to very masculine or feminine people, and bisexuals tend more towards androgynous, or at least less pronounced masculine or feminine people?
I think it would kind of make sense, but there's a really good chance that it just isn't the case at all.

In my honest opinion. I believe Bi porn should just be strictly a man and a she male maybe even two. Because obviously from what I seen the female serves no purpose to a bisexual male.

And I use to like bi porn.

There's always erotic writing and drawing. We should take things into our own hands.

There's only a single gay sci-fi/fantasy story on lit, and that one has been discontinued two years ago. All that untapped potential!

 

[Queen_Vicki]

I think of I kind of missed my central point when starting this thread. Getting the confusing details but forgetting the important part.

But could it be, that homosexual people "on average" - for whatever that means - have stronger attractions to very masculine or feminine people, and bisexuals tend more towards androgynous, or at least less pronounced masculine or feminine people?
I think it would kind of make sense, but there's a really good chance that it just isn't the case at all.


There's always erotic writing and drawing. We should take things into our own hands.

There's only a single gay sci-fi/fantasy story on lit, and that one has been discontinued two years ago. All that untapped potential!

In fact we should do exactly that. Actually in my story Dark Serenity the main two male leads will hook up along with the female of course. And then eventually the males will be alone all by themselves for a chapter. So in other words my characters are one big happy menage a trois that love each other equally for different reasons. I know you said you a gay male I just thought you might want to check it out once it's done.

 

[Little Bird]

No, I'm pansexual.

But hurry, I want to read that.

 

[DennyBTX]

I'm with Phydeaux

I'm attracted to cock, not men...weird, huh? I LOVE women, I love to LOOK at women, have sex with women, etc...but deep down, I also LOVE cock!...so I dig watching She-male porn...easy solution!

I doubt I'll ever encounter a "lady-boy" but the porn is there, and it's fun! In the meantime, if I can find another married and bi friend, I'd have some fun!

Very cock fixated, enjoy watching gay and especially bisexual porn, but love watching hetero sex and really enjoy watching girl-girl even more than guy-guy.
Trannys and she-males don't do it for me. Just a man's man with a cock is what I'm after.

 

[CandiCame]

I think of I kind of missed my central point when starting this thread. Getting the confusing details but forgetting the important part.

But could it be, that homosexual people "on average" - for whatever that means - have stronger attractions to very masculine or feminine people, and bisexuals tend more towards androgynous, or at least less pronounced masculine or feminine people?
I think it would kind of make sense, but there's a really good chance that it just isn't the case at all.


There's always erotic writing and drawing. We should take things into our own hands.

There's only a single gay sci-fi/fantasy story on lit, and that one has been discontinued two years ago. All that untapped potential!

I'm writing a mostly gay fantasy story.