Luna's Haven~closed save for invitees.

[southern_slut]

It got quiet quickly. Hello? Am I alone now.

No Ave, sorry, I was trying not to hog the thread. Everyone seems so busy.

 

[Avellan13]

I never said you were hogging the thread.

 

[southern_slut]

Its why I've been so quiet. I always think I talk too much.

 

[Avellan13]

You don't talk too much. Not that I know of. Luna says she has to leave soon and she said she was busy. Everyone else just stepped by or, in Vail's case, fell by.

 

[southern_slut]

Yeah, I saw that. Not sure what to say aabout it though. Sounds like she had fun though.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

A quiet re-entry. Pulling the lap top from the desk and meandering down to the basement. I need the trappings of control while I work on Jakee for The Dreamer. I need the silence.

Down the stairs, each step pulling me further into the inner contentment that others are never really a part of. I am scared. In real life. I am worried. My Daddi? We are having a moment...a long moment...where we just do not connect. It isn't like before. It is both better and worse than before and i do not KNOW how to fix it...or even if I can.

A sigh. A sign up...at the entrance to my haven. Written in blood red ink...

No visitors.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Thoughts in my Cyber Dungeon

Finally, the werewolf is done. Loup Garou Jakee written and given. I love writing for the Dreamer. She makes me think. I like that.

Three difficult posts done today. Each story important. However, the one I write with Sasha is the most true to me. I put bits of me into Lorena, bits of what I believe true BDSM is. NOT blood or pain, not endless rules or code words. Not just scenes. It is a way of LIVING, of giving yourself to another. It is a building up of trust, of facing the reality that some one has given you control of them and you must be WORTHY of it.

It isn't just words on a screen. It's not just beating someone. It is LOVE. I have seen a few here that embody that~Raven/Cherry, Ausus, minxlette, my red one and her Sir. Real people who try to live their real lives based on the pogrom that BDSM is not the be all and end all...it is simply a WAY of building on a love and trust that is already there.

I write what I KNOW for Sasha, in the hopes that someone who has never delved as deeply as I have, will read it and learn something about what I believe. I love the story we are building. I am proud of it...and proud of her for allowing me this canvas to express myself. One of these days, I will tell her so.

Truth is malleable. What I believe, what I think? It's not true for others. Others might see BDSM as simply a game, something to slip on and off, like a coat. It may very well work for them. I try not judge as my judgement has been flawed a time or two.

But when I read the words of others, I can't help but wonder. How much have they ever REALLY experienced in the RW? How much is make believe? How many people read what is written and decide that must be the way of it?

There are good threads for those looking to learn. Good writers. I have given kudos where they could be seen...and some I have kept to myself...for reasons I don't dare write down. Even so, how can you tell what is based on reality and what is based on imagination? You can't. In my mind? I should write what I know for sasha because it is what I know...long years of real world practice has made it known. I bare the scars. I bare the marks. I worked for my command and my status. I should write what I know...and hope that other people read it and see it as something I believe. Even if it isn't true for them.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

I close the lap top and carry the contraption up to the first floor, storing it in the desk. I think I need a swim and I need sand. My waterfall doesn't HAVE sand. Maybe the Outlook for a bit. I feel that I should probably drop M13 a line. Gonna close Lanie down in the Burlesque thread so that I can work on beginning our Fae/mortal story.

head shake

Upstairs and then outside. I shift on the fly from two feet to four and head out. The sign stays up. I don't need intrusion. Real life is calm and I want to BE calm too. The Outlook and a swim.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Home. Back from the Feast of flesh and the Outlook. Back from my random tries at being normal. This is where I am safe. This is where sanity rules. Here, within this place. I want to drag someone to my basement, some one who can understand what i require and give me that.

My red one is not here...and waiting gets harder. I try. But it gets harder.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

I owe at least two very important posts. Am still looking to see if there is anything else but for the nonce? I owe only two. With a sigh I wander outside and flop down on my porch swing. Another day, another dollar...at work yet again in the RW...seems it will be a very LONG night.

A yawn. What to do first? Check the rest of the threads? Grab a virginal vixen and poke her til she gives me something? Check on the crazy....and end the bit in the Burlesque thread. Has went on far too long...Plus Lorena and Jakee. Busy day, filled with many words.

Another yawn. I will start soon. First though? I look out into my woods and contemplate the day.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

A salad, covered with boneless chicken breast...yummy. I finish the last few bites and rise from the porch swing to wash the plate and prepare myself for work. There are words needed and so I must focus well enough to get them written down.

A wide happy smile, a smaller yawn and I retreat into my abode. I am content. And maybe, just maybe, I will be more than content in a little while.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

My time has been slightly productive. I have removed Lanie from the Burlesque thread, thus freeing myself to work on the Dark Fae idea. I am also plotting my post for Sasha and Fr33kness. I want it to ring true.

But that takes time....and I am at work. *le sigh*

 

[Daddi_DJ]

I walk through the woods, ignoring my allergies. I need to leave my munchkin something so she knows that I am not too far away. Something that lets her know that she is still my heart. Something that lets her know that I long to be with her.

As I approach the porch I see Gray poke his head out. He comes to me and I sit on the swing with him next to me...thinking. He looks at me as if he knows what my turmoils are and then lays his head on my lap while nudging my hand to pet him. Gray knows me as well as he knows her. Maybe because we are very similar in a lot of ways. I love fang as I do my luna.

After petting Gray for awhile I hesitantly get up knowing that I must leave because my beautiful one is no longer here.

I walk to the porch and place a present (my blue and white blanket) on her porch in hopes that she will know what it means.

With my head down, I tell fang to be good and watch him look at me in acceptance. He then turns around and goes through his door. I turn around feeling comforted by Fang's understanding and start back through the woods hoping against all hope that my baby girl will know what it is meant by the blanket.

 

[dragonrazor]

*slips up to the porch, grumbling as he sinks into a chair*

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

I come home, to my Haven, after my sojourn in the RW. I have much to contemplate~a post for the Darkness, the way the poppet's thread is tending, and various other little bits and pieces. Who knows how much of that I will accomplish?
After all, I am at work and it promises to be another busy day.

With a sigh, I walk outside. There I spy a blanket from a daddi. I pick it up, sigh softly, and carry it inside. Things are so shaky right now. I haven't felt this unsure since last summer...and I hate it. The blanket helps, but not enough. Not enough. I place it on the back of my couch and run small fingers over it. I miss her...but this time I don't know if I have the strength to fight...not right now. I think that this time, she should fight for me.

I love her...but it's hard. And instead of getting easier with time, it gets worse. I brush those thoughts away. This is a fantasy and here, I shouldn't have to worry about RW things. I move to my desk and take out my lap top. I need to write...something. Anything. NOW.

 

[Sasha25]

*I peek out from a tree to see. Luna is on the porch, ready to write. The Haven has been very busy lately, and I don't want to crowd. Dressed in thin, soft white lined, walking tentatively closer, giving her a chance to see that I am there, only willing to come closer if I have an invitation*

 

[dragonrazor]

*flying dragony pounce upon Sasha, then Luna, then curls up on top of the porch roof*

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

*I peek out from a tree to see. Luna is on the porch, ready to write. The Haven has been very busy lately, and I don't want to crowd. Dressed in thin, soft white linen, walking tentatively closer, giving her a chance to see that I am there, only willing to come closer if I have an invitation*

Looking up, I spy a poppet. I motion her up on to the porch with a smile

hello, pretty poppet. You gave a phenomenal last post.

*flying dragony pounce upon Sasha, then Luna, then curls up on top of the porch roof*

*grins up at draggy*

 

[dragonrazor]

Okay, not a very good post, but I got something up on the preacher...

 

[Daddi_DJ]

I see my sweet munchkin has a lot of company already today. I would stick around but think it is best to leave. However, I will not leave until I leave her a note. The note reads: "Daddi is here and will always be here. I am not going anywhere just giving you space. If I must fight I will fight to the death, not sure how but tell me and it is done. I love you."

I acknowledge the friends of my love that are congregating on the porch. "Hello everyone." I then continue to the door.

I place the note right inside Gray's door. I feel a wet nose brush on my hand. Gray then rubs against my hand. I pet him and tell him "I will be back Gray. I promise."

I turn and walk back towards the woods and start off on a long journey back to the RW, as they call it here. *Sigh* hopefully I can catch my beautiful luna soon, tonight.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Gray yips to get my attention. I glance over and spy a piece of paper. Daddi has left me something. I put the lap top to the side and get up, snatching it up and reading it. The sentiment makes me smile...but words are only words...and only time will tell.

With a quick glance to see if I spot her...I retreat to my swing and hide the note in my bra. Picking up my lap top, I return to thinking on my post for the Darkness. Hopefully she answers my query, soon.

 

[Sasha25]

Thank you again, Luna. Our story is really pushing me, and I love it.

*sitting quietly by Luna, sipping some green tea with honey, enjoying the quiet of the forest, glad to just share Luna's company as she writes*

 

[dragonrazor]

Hmmm *tags you both*

 

[Daddi_DJ]

Do I hear something?? Is it my munchkin's swing? I should go back. Yes go back. I start back to the den. Why she chose the woods knowing my allergies won't allow me to be here without sneezing fits I will never know.

I walk up on the den and there she is. My love. My heart races. How I miss her! EVERYTHING about her.

I walk up to her and try to look at her but can't. Feel wrong. Feel like a bad daddi.

"Hello munchkin." :0)

 

[Daddi_DJ]

"Hello again Sasha, Draggy. Has been a long time."