A case of Bad look or the norm?

smallncute

Literotica Guru
Joined
May 21, 2002
Posts
862
Hi all...

Been frequenting these forums for a couple of months so far, and started quite a few RP stories - at least a dozen

Most have fizzled out very quickly. A couple have stopped for real life situations which my partner had the politeness to contact me and discuss via pms.

But most have just died quietly a slow death..


So am I unlucky?

Is it my style?

Or is it the norm?

Ms M
 
So am I unlucky?

Is it my style?

Or is it the norm?

Ms M

It seems to be a combo of bad luck and the norm. Most stories start off strong and peter out within a few pages. Usually, it's because the idea doesn't pan out as well as one hopes or because the co-author no longer likes the way the story is tending. (And sometimes...it really is because life came along and kicked someone's back teeth down their throats.)

I write constantly and am always striving to expand the types of stories I will do, as well as the people I write with. People with different styles tend not to write well together...so if most of your co-authors don't write like you, interest fades.

Eventually, you will find a few people that you can write with, people with style that matches yours. When that happens, it's magical. Good luck.

Luna
 
Personally I think it is normal for people who are relatively new or unknown on the lounge forums to experience such things.

With no real intent on alienating anyone, people tend to write with their friends. And friends create chemistry. And chemistry is what makes a story continue. We are all creatures of habit, I suppose. That is what I have noticed anyway.

Every now and then you get lucky and get a co-writer who you don't know, and it works. Though it seems I am also yet to find someone like that.

All I can say is don't give up. Keep having fun and eventually one will stick.

Fingers crossed for you sweetie.

- Shy :rose:
 
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Personally I think it is normal for people who are relatively new or unknown on the lounge forums to experience such things.

With no real intent on alienating anyone, people tend to write with their friends. And friends create chemistry. And chemistry is what makes a story continue. We are all creatures of habit, I suppose. That is what I have noticed anyway.

Every now and then you get lucky and get a co-writer who you don't know, and it works. Though it seems I am also yet to find someone like that.

All I can say is don't give up. Keep having fun and eventually one will stick.

Fingers crossed for you sweetie.

- Shy :rose:

Quoted for truth. You'll get there. :3
 
Well at the moment I am feeling slightly dis-illusioned...

I know i have, by generally preferring fem/fem scenarios I am limiting myself to a lot of people...

Yet in another thread there were several females commenting on the lack of fem fem stories yet they have remained quiet for the most part to my pms!

Oh well
 
Well at the moment I am feeling slightly dis-illusioned...

I know i have, by generally preferring fem/fem scenarios I am limiting myself to a lot of people...

Yet in another thread there were several females commenting on the lack of fem fem stories yet they have remained quiet for the most part to my pms!

Oh well
I understand...truly I do. I am exactly the same way at the moment. And it does make you question your own abilities.

But the truth is, most of the writers here are writing with people they know well...they are all friends and interlinked fairly tightly. To break into that and try and find a co-writer is hard. I was told not to give up...so I am passing that on to you too.

*hugs softly*
 
I understand...truly I do. I am exactly the same way at the moment. And it does make you question your own abilities.

But the truth is, most of the writers here are writing with people they know well...they are all friends and interlinked fairly tightly. To break into that and try and find a co-writer is hard. I was told not to give up...so I am passing that on to you too.

*hugs softly*

Hi Shy

Thank you for your kind words....

Will try an persevere. but suddenly it seems all my stories which seemed to be going well, and had a chemistry have gone very quiet...

One has contacted me to apologies and give her apologies for bailing out but...
 
I doubt it would be anything personal, you seem capable of putting words together so I would simply assume that it is a case of bad timing, or some other distraction preventing them from posting quickly or for them having to bail out.

It does occasionally happen that writers do not feel suited and they may bail, but one would hope they would be polite enough to let you know and not just leave you hanging. I know when I went on hiatus I posted up a leaving thread, so I know I left some threads in the lurch but I do hope they all saw my note.

You can always simply send your co writers a Pm and ask them straight out if it was your writing or a simple bad luck and timing thing.
 
Hi small,

For a new writer, you will go through a lot of fizzling threads at the start. It is unfortunately common for people to just drop threads without giving cause, reason or apologies. Even for people who've been around for a while.

A lot of writers are very choosy about who they write with, and wont touch a new writer until they have built up some work. There are plenty of women writers out there that will do Lesbian & Bi-Sexual threads, even those who will normally do heterosexual threads.

All I can suggest is read through the various threads done by writers of the genre you like. Have a look in the lounge thread The Vortex Of Silk And Teeth. This is a ladies only place, so you will find lots of writers with similar interests to you. Look at the threads they have done. Maybe even post in there, and get to know some of the other writers, and let them get to know you as well. It might help break the ice enough to get you into some longer lasting threads.

Anyway, I hope it helps you a little.


Cheers,

M13
 
I’m not by any means the oldest serving writer here on Lit, not even close, but if there’s anything I've learned in my time here peddling my bad writing its that eventually, after dozens of failures and crappy threads, you get one that’s gold. Don’t worry, good threads and good partners will come, it’s all a matter of patience.

Well, patience and occasionally spamming the board with as many threads and ideas you can come up with until you get one that works, but don’t do that other one too often.
 
Hi Miranda,

Please do not think that I have abandoned our story together. Lately I am going through a writing slump, and feel like even the posts I make here in the lounge are poor efforts. For my role plays I am involved in, (not just yours) I am doing well to manage a post a week. I know that isn't fair to my co-writers, but I'm the sort of personality that if I can't do a decent job with a post I'm satisfied with, I'm going to wait until I can, not just post any old thing.

If you can bear with me, our story will continue. I just ask for your kind patience.
 
How is it that a thread that has stalled is to be considered a failure?

And why is it courteous to give a reason? What does that accomplish?
 
How is it that a thread that has stalled is to be considered a failure?

And why is it courteous to give a reason? What does that accomplish?

It is not always to be considered as such, but if one is insecure about their writing capabilities, they feel a sense of rejection and failure to keep their partner interested in the writing, resulting in a stall.

It is courteous to explain absence much in the same way one explains absence from a meeting of some sort. It is not expressly needed, but one or both parties feel better from having explained their absence, for their own conscience's sake. It only accomplishes the satiation of the worrisome part of people's minds. It is a validation of sorts. "I'm not a bad writer, they're just busy right now." That sort of thing.
 
I fail to see how a message detailing my absence, in eight years of writing here, makes any difference in the perception a co-author has.
 
I fail to see how a message detailing my absence, in eight years of writing here, makes any difference in the perception a co-author has.

As you avatar states...

You are a real bastard.

Politeness doesn't cost anything and offers so much.

If I cannot be online for a couple of days I try to warn my co-writers; NOT leave them in the lurch; unknowing.
 
I
It is courteous to explain absence much in the same way one explains absence from a meeting of some sort. It is not expressly needed, but one or both parties feel better from having explained their absence, for their own conscience's sake. It only accomplishes the satiation of the worrisome part of people's minds. It is a validation of sorts. "I'm not a bad writer, they're just busy right now." That sort of thing.

Nicely Stated
 
I fail to see how a message detailing my absence, in eight years of writing here, makes any difference in the perception a co-author has.

I guess it's nice to be polite. Threads are cooperative efforts, and if you have a thread you're enjoying, the disappearance of a co-writer is unfortunate. If you're warned in advance of a potential disappearance have some kind of timeframe for when you can get back to writing, that's helpful. It's better to know than to be kept in limbo while waiting.
 
I fail to see how a message detailing my absence, in eight years of writing here, makes any difference in the perception a co-author has.

Their perception of you? That's not really what it's about.

It's about self-perception. A message to inform a co-author of your absence gives them a reassurance that you have not abandoned them, that they are actually worth the time to note this disruption to an ongoing story, instead of just being left there to twist in the wind, pining away for a reply.
 
In an effort to bring this more back on track, the issues you're going through are rather normal for one when starts here. A few of my first threads just fizzled, hell some of them still do, it just takes some patience. People write with people they're comfortable with, it just takes a bit of time to find the write co-authors. Even then, the subject material can have a bearing on whom you write with.

Just be patient, persistence is almost always rewarded here. Also, find people to hang out with in the lounges/writers you'd like to thread with and approach them directly. This tends to have better results than just posting and hoping.
 
Well at the moment I am feeling slightly dis-illusioned
At least with regard to threads dying, I wouldn't be disillusioned. If you look through every thread on this board, you will find vanishingly few that are written to completion. I'd go with Luna_Wolf's reasons on this one. Starting a thread is fairly easy. There's enthusiasm in a new task and often the fascination of a new partner.

Actually writing one to completion is FAR more difficult. It takes a great deal of perseverence on the parts of both (or more) writers as you work through bouts of writer's block; moments when you feel your prose isn't up to snuff; or times when life gets in the way.

Personally I regard as doomed to die well before it gets finished every last thread I begin or jump into, and I cherish the three (3!) I've written my character to narrative completion.

Insofar as you're able, enjoy the process and the interpersonal exchanges, and make writing complete stories secondary.
 
Their perception of you? That's not really what it's about.

That's not what I was saying at all.

It's about self-perception. A message to inform a co-author of your absence gives them a reassurance that you have not abandoned them, that they are actually worth the time to note this disruption to an ongoing story, instead of just being left there to twist in the wind, pining away for a reply.

Well, as far as my experiences are concerned, that's not the case. In my experience, particularly in regards to a co-author's insecurity, that persists regardless your assurances one way or another.

That's all I was expressing. I've given notice in the last couple years to my authors, not just about potential absences but in my rapidly changing interests and the nature of my life and how it takes me away from a place where writing is something I care to spend time doing.

The co-authors that have shown understanding and appreciation are the same co-authors that would understand and appreciate whether I let them know or not.

I don't think it has any effect, at all, on the way they approach writing with you.
 
I suppose my advice Miss M would be to go into a new thread with humble expectations. There is a lot of great advice here. But personally, my rules that I try to follow are:

1. Do not let your writing self-esteem be dictated by co-writers or anyone else here on this site. Write for yourself and your own enjoyment.

2. Be as open about your expectations as you can be before you begin to write. Things like how often you would like a co-writer to post, possible restrictions, where you see the thread going etc. I personally can't write everyday. It can take me a few days to fiddle over a post, sometimes a few weeks depending on life. We all write at different rates, so finding out such information before hand will help you find that chemistry.

3. Expect life to effect your co-writer. If in 2 weeks you have not heard from your co-writer, presume that life has taken them away. Life happens and we can't control it. If in 4 weeks you haven't heard, take the story idea and try and re-fill the role or restart it with someone new. Personally life falls pretty low on the priority scale when life troubles start. While I try and make an effort to let co-writers know what is going on, it isn't always possible. (I know how frustrating it is when this happens, but most people here understand this.)

4. Don't give up; either on yourself or writing here. Enjoy it for what it is. At the end of the day, it all comes down to you writing for yourself. :)

*hugs of encouragement*
- Shy :rose:
 
.
Thank you Shy

Your advice is what I am trying to adhere to..

But the timing was poor, it seems a couple of co-writers have disappeared during the same week....

I have realised reading threads from when I started that alot of stories dry up, fizzle out in 2 or 3 days. I do not include those and as a general rule do not add them to my ongoing story list until several posts over a period of time.

I was unlucky in that two writers have gone quet on me during the same time. I am aware that reality will affect people (including myself). Part of my issue I guess is that it as been difficult to find bi-sexual/lesbian females to write with.

Have a great weekend

Ms M




I suppose my advice Miss M would be to go into a new thread with humble expectations. There is a lot of great advice here. But personally, my rules that I try to follow are:

1. Do not let your writing self-esteem be dictated by co-writers or anyone else here on this site. Write for yourself and your own enjoyment.

2. Be as open about your expectations as you can be before you begin to write. Things like how often you would like a co-writer to post, possible restrictions, where you see the thread going etc. I personally can't write everyday. It can take me a few days to fiddle over a post, sometimes a few weeks depending on life. We all write at different rates, so finding out such information before hand will help you find that chemistry.

3. Expect life to effect your co-writer. If in 2 weeks you have not heard from your co-writer, presume that life has taken them away. Life happens and we can't control it. If in 4 weeks you haven't heard, take the story idea and try and re-fill the role or restart it with someone new. Personally life falls pretty low on the priority scale when life troubles start. While I try and make an effort to let co-writers know what is going on, it isn't always possible. (I know how frustrating it is when this happens, but most people here understand this.)

4. Don't give up; either on yourself or writing here. Enjoy it for what it is. At the end of the day, it all comes down to you writing for yourself. :)

*hugs of encouragement*
- Shy :rose:
 
That's not what I was saying at all.

Ok, I misinterpreted that then.



Well, as far as my experiences are concerned, that's not the case. In my experience, particularly in regards to a co-author's insecurity, that persists regardless your assurances one way or another.

That's all I was expressing. I've given notice in the last couple years to my authors, not just about potential absences but in my rapidly changing interests and the nature of my life and how it takes me away from a place where writing is something I care to spend time doing.

The co-authors that have shown understanding and appreciation are the same co-authors that would understand and appreciate whether I let them know or not.

I don't think it has any effect, at all, on the way they approach writing with you.

Fair enough. I do agree that the insecurities will persist, even with reassurances. I just think some people place a lot of value in those little "by the way" messages, and whether or not someone uses them could affect how they approach other potential writers.

I believe that both our examples are certainly plausible, but neither is an absolute rule, obviously.
 
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Well still seems to be an issue...


Not sure what to do really....

Try to find some one we start... they leave or suddenly no longer like the idea we developed.

Guess I am tired and emotional after a long day but still....

Seems the normal catch 22 situation. People encourage us to stay and make an effort yet have a valid reason why they cant be the one to help a new member establish them selves...
 
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