How do you define "time together" for LDRs?

[Primalex]

I see him about once every 6 weeks. We've been together over 2 years.

No, you've been together (2*52/6)*days per visit. So something around a month or two.

 

[Cattypuss]

Primalex, when you say how long you've been with your wife, do you subtract all the days and hours you've spent apart?

 

[Primalex]

Primalex, when you say how long you've been with your wife, do you subtract all the days and hours you've spent apart?

If you would do the Buck Rogers and spend 492 years in a freezer^1, would you believe that you've been together with your s.o. 492 years?



^1:
Disclaimer:
Buck didn't spend the time in a freezer, but it's easier to explain it this way.

 

[Cattypuss]

I don't need some kind of reductio ad absurdam game from you. I asked you a fair question.

 

[Primalex]

I don't need some kind of reductio ad absurdam game from you. I asked you a fair question.

I think my question is fair, too.

 

[Etoile]

Talk about it...

Whoops, I thought I would show as thread starter. Sorry.

 

[Cattypuss]

OK. First I want a definition of "LDR"

 

[Etoile]

Sorry, it's Long Distance Relationship.

Can cover online, a spouse in the military, whatever.

 

[Cattypuss]

Sorry, it's Long Distance Relationship.

Can cover online, a spouse in the military, whatever.

Sorry, yes, I know what it stands for.

But e.g. what is my relationship? He now works away Monday to Friday (didn't used to) and so I often only see him at weekends.

 

[Etoile]

Ah, that's something you have to ask Primalex, since he clearly knows more about this than anybody else.

 

[Cattypuss]

Ah, that's something you have to ask Primalex, since he clearly knows more about this than anybody else.

 

[Primalex]

Primalex, when you say how long you've been with your wife, do you subtract all the days and hours you've spent apart?

I think the most important part is how you track the time.

If you already explain your relationship as "once every 6 weeks", then this is the time together. Two years is just a period.

Then, if you would explain your relationship as "we've been together for 2 years, but once every 6 weeks he is gone", then you keep track of your relationship in a completely different way and then I think it's valid to omit the rest and just state 2 years, without subtracting a few days or hours.

The difference is that in one scenario they are together 34 days from 730, in the other case 696 from 730. I think it's fair to say that 696 is close enough to 730 that the difference is negligible, but I really can't see a negligible difference between 34 and 730.

 

[Etoile]

I think the most important part is how you track the time.

If you already explain your relationship as "once every 6 weeks", then this is the time together. Two years is just a period.

Then, if you would explain your relationship as "we've been together for 2 years, but once every 6 weeks he is gone", then you keep track of your relationship in a completely different way and then I think it's valid to omit the rest and just state 2 years, without subtracting a few days or hours.

The difference is that in one scenario they are together 34 days from 730, in the other case 696 from 730. I think it's fair to say that 696 is close enough to 730 that the difference is negligible, but I really can't see a negligible difference between 34 and 730.

With those semantics in mind, what would you say about a couple who's been dating for a year when suddenly one of them is deployed for military service (say a year)? At the end of the deployment, have they been together one year or two? Or let's say it's a three year deployment with one-week trips home every six months. At the end, have they been together four years, or one year and a couple of months?

 

[the captians wench]

. .

 

[Cattypuss]

. .

 

[Etoile]

I think it's a valid discussion.

You could also do this with fuckbuddies. How long have they been together if they only fuck each other when they're desperate?

 

[Cattypuss]

This is officially my favourite thread of the week

 

[Primalex]

Ah, that's something you have to ask Primalex, since he clearly knows more about this than anybody else.

Not bad - I think 80% of the postings here could be replaced with this kind of reply, just replacing the name. I need to remember this sentence, when I'm too lazy to write something.

(And I never used the abbreviation LDR - so why do you pretend I would be the one who defines it? I wrote about "being together" and it really doesn't take much to know when you are together with someone and when not. Unless you don't like the truth.)

 

[Cattypuss]

... and it just keeps getting better

 

[the captians wench]

I think it's a valid discussion.

You could also do this with fuckbuddies. How long have they been together if they only fuck each other when they're desperate?

I think it could be. But I don't think it will be.

 

[Etoile]

Not bad - I think 80% of the postings here could be replaced with this kind of reply, just replacing the name. I need to remember this sentence, when I'm too lazy to write something.

(And I never used the abbreviation LDR - so why do you pretend I would be the one who defines it? I wrote about "being together" and it really doesn't take much to know when you are together with someone and when not. Unless you don't like the truth.)

I needed a concise title. I meant to have an introductory post, but it lists them chronologically.

 

[Primalex]

With those semantics in mind, what would you say about a couple who's been dating for a year when suddenly one of them is deployed for military service (say a year)? At the end of the deployment, have they been together one year or two? Or let's say it's a three year deployment with one-week trips home every six months. At the end, have they been together four years, or one year and a couple of months?

What do they say about their relationship?


(Obviously you didn't read my previous answer. Which is sad. You don't need to pretend curiosity if you just want to exhale a little bit of spite, because I dared to belittle all those long term LDRs. You are just wasting our time, feel free to express your anger, you don't need to wrap it in questions.)

 

[Primalex]

... and it just keeps getting better

Sure, you still owe me an answer to my question.

 

[Primalex]

You could also do this with fuckbuddies. How long have they been together if they only fuck each other when they're desperate?

0

They might know each other for several years, but this doesn't mean they have been together several years. You aren't together with all the kids from high school either right now just because you know them since then, are you?

 

[Cattypuss]

Sure, you still owe me an answer to my question.

(a) I'm not convinced that I do.

(b) In either case I'm pretty sure I won't be losing sleep over it.