The Isolated Blurt BDSM Thread

[CutieMouse]

So a week after picking up the keys, my house finally has heat (which took a plumber, a city inspector, a gas company guy, AND a HVAC service call LOL), most of my stuff is put away (2 more pieces of art to hang, plus tweaking of the kitchen pantry/cabinets), I have groceries out the ying-yang... and when I came home tonight after a long, frustrating, disappointing day at work I discovered my favorite thing about my new home.

I walked into a tidy home full of stuff I like, hung up my winter coat, hugged the cat, poured a glass of wine, threw together an omelet, did prep-dishes while I cooked/quickly wiped down the counters once it was plated before sitting down to a late meal. No mess, no somebody else's stuff, no noise, no distractions, no one to work around.

For the first time in ages I can actually breathe...

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

“But there is suffering in life, and there are defeats. No one can avoid them. But it's better to lose some of the battles in the struggles for your dreams than to be defeated without ever knowing what you're fighting for.”
-Paulo Coelho

No matter how much it sucks at the time, in the long term it is better to know what we're fight for - to know what it really is that we want. Kind of an emotional version of forewarned is forearmed. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Thank you.

I miss the total submission. Terribly. And I keep getting the joneses for playing, but it isn't playing that I want. I mean I do, but that's not the driving force. The driving force, the craving that feels like it's driving me nuts, is to submit.
<snip>.

Tonight I just miss...

So a week after picking up the keys, my house finally has heat (which took a plumber, a city inspector, a gas company guy, AND a HVAC service call LOL), most of my stuff is put away (2 more pieces of art to hang, plus tweaking of the kitchen pantry/cabinets), I have groceries out the ying-yang... and when I came home tonight after a long, frustrating, disappointing day at work I discovered my favorite thing about my new home.

I walked into a tidy home full of stuff I like, hung up my winter coat, hugged the cat, poured a glass of wine, threw together an omelet, did prep-dishes while I cooked/quickly wiped down the counters once it was plated before sitting down to a late meal. No mess, no somebody else's stuff, no noise, no distractions, no one to work around.

For the first time in ages I can actually breathe...

Congratulations, CM. You are really house proud. It's all over school that there's a party there tomorrow night, right? And your parents are out of town?

 

[CutieMouse]

Congratulations, CM. You are really house proud. It's all over school that there's a party there tomorrow night, right? And your parents are out of town?

Totally.

I even have vodka in the freezer and box wine in the fridge.

:nods excitedly:

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

I agree.

Maybe eating comfort food in your new car would help, as well. Wait. That would just make it not-new.

Well, it's not new, just new to me. But now it smells more like gourmet burger than cleaning product.

It's good to hear that you're on the upswing and that you've found a happy moment to aim toward. That's good.

And lack of contact for a week sucks all on its own, but lack of contact for a week after a major conversation... You are a better woman than me, Lizzie.

It would appear not, given the mood of the week.

I'm alright now though. I also indulged in some retail therapy and bought new jewelry for my piercings. Though now I should think about something new for my vag one, but I'd need help changing that.

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

Tonight I just miss...

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

So a week after picking up the keys, my house finally has heat (which took a plumber, a city inspector, a gas company guy, AND a HVAC service call LOL), most of my stuff is put away (2 more pieces of art to hang, plus tweaking of the kitchen pantry/cabinets), I have groceries out the ying-yang... and when I came home tonight after a long, frustrating, disappointing day at work I discovered my favorite thing about my new home.

I walked into a tidy home full of stuff I like, hung up my winter coat, hugged the cat, poured a glass of wine, threw together an omelet, did prep-dishes while I cooked/quickly wiped down the counters once it was plated before sitting down to a late meal. No mess, no somebody else's stuff, no noise, no distractions, no one to work around.

For the first time in ages I can actually breathe...

That's the best thing about having your own space. It's YOURS.

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

Okay, that's enough, thank you very much.

A big wad of cash fell out of my pocket somewhere on my trip.

My phone is AWOL and I think I may have run over it with the car.

I have lost more valuables this week than any other 5-day period, ever.

 

[chy_girl]

i think it may have been a Very Bad Idea to bottom, let alone heavy bottoming, when it was the submission i craved. the scene was good. exceptionally good. and i did good - like a good bottom and i was a very good girl. and then afterward i realized that no one important was there to see that i did good and that i was a good girl. and then i really super remembered the i don't even have a collar anymore and i couldn't even hold it and rub on it like i did when they were just away. and then i wanted to cry and couldn't cause i need to show grace and fucking dignity. and then i really just wanted to go home and couldn't even do that cause i was driving alone. and i still left before i should have cause i couldn't do it anymore and now i have subdrop from hell and i really, really, really want my Person back and it's not fair and i don't like it. and to top it off my tears feel all acidy again and this really fucking sucks. can i pretty please emotionally safeword now cause i really don't like this!


</lingering subspace ramblings>

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

i think it may have been a Very Bad Idea to bottom, let alone heavy bottoming, when it was the submission i craved. the scene was good. exceptionally good. and i did good - like a good bottom and i was a very good girl. and then afterward i realized that no one important was there to see that i did good and that i was a good girl. and then i really super remembered the i don't even have a collar anymore and i couldn't even hold it and rub on it like i did when they were just away. and then i wanted to cry and couldn't cause i need to show grace and fucking dignity. and then i really just wanted to go home and couldn't even do that cause i was driving alone. and i still left before i should have cause i couldn't do it anymore and now i have subdrop from hell and i really, really, really want my Person back and it's not fair and i don't like it. and to top it off my tears feel all acidy again and this really fucking sucks. can i pretty please emotionally safeword now cause i really don't like this!


</lingering subspace ramblings>

*cuddles up and watches funnies and eats ice cream with you*

 

[chy_girl]

*cuddles up and watches funnies and eats ice cream with you*

*cuddles up next to lizzie and tries not to cry on her too much*


i think i need to sleep. maybe that'd make it better.

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

Holy crap I'm sick of that Marilyn Monroe quote.

It's right up there with Anais bloody Nin.

*stomp*

 

[Cattypuss]

What Marilyn Monroe quote?

My blurt...

today I find myself glad to be alive, just for the sake of being alive.

I can only conclude that my gym visits have been working nefarious magic on my hitherto months-fucked brain chemistry.

 

[DiscusDave]

Dave! Dood, where ya been?

Well, lets see... a college graduation, a political campaign, a move across country, new apartment and car hunting, the start of my masters degree program, a trip overseas, a new job, starting of my masters thesis research, and raising a new pet scorpion....

I think I've been under a rock... aka Texas.

Hehe... How've you been? I indeed have been away for far too long, I miss this place. and have henceforth resigned myself to coming back to the site full swing.

 

[graceanne]

</lingering subspace ramblings>

*huggles and chocolate*

Chocolate makes everything better. *nods*

 

[DiscusDave]

*huggles and chocolate*

Chocolate makes everything better. *nods*

Amen!


Here chy... enjoy!! (forwarded from graceanne )

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_UIXOn06Pz70/R7y7TKu52GI/AAAAAAAAB7I/ZGlBHZZO9xc/s800/Chocolate+Cheesecake.jpg

 

[CutieMouse]

Well, lets see... a college graduation, a political campaign, a move across country, new apartment and car hunting, the start of my masters degree program, a trip overseas, a new job, starting of my masters thesis research, and raising a new pet scorpion....

I think I've been under a rock... aka Texas.

Hehe... How've you been? I indeed have been away for far too long, I miss this place. and have henceforth resigned myself to coming back to the site full swing.

Hey! Texas isn't a.... Oh you're in The Panhandle. Yeah, that's a rock.

 

[chy_girl]

Well, lets see... a college graduation, a political campaign, a move across country, new apartment and car hunting, the start of my masters degree program, a trip overseas, a new job, starting of my masters thesis research, and raising a new pet scorpion....

I think I've been under a rock... aka Texas.

Hehe... How've you been? I indeed have been away for far too long, I miss this place. and have henceforth resigned myself to coming back to the site full swing.

You know, I can't decide if you're full of crap or not. You don't seem much like a Texas man.

*huggles and chocolate*

Chocolate makes everything better. *nods*

Yes. Except chocolate frosting. That part went over very poorly with my stomach.

It was a really fun scene during though. I was so fricking high on endorphins that the whole room was laughing. Well, most of the room. There was one guy who mostly seemed confused because all I could do is sit and laugh. I don't think he's seen me scene much though. Everyone else had.

 

[chy_girl]

Amen!


Here chy... enjoy!! (forwarded from graceanne )

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_UIXOn06Pz70/R7y7TKu52GI/AAAAAAAAB7I/ZGlBHZZO9xc/s800/Chocolate+Cheesecake.jpg

I want ^that for breakfast. With a side of hickory smoked bacon and a glass of milk. And pineapple.

Thank you. (Both )

 

[DiscusDave]

You know, I can't decide if you're full of crap or not. You don't seem much like a Texas man.

I'm not. I'm from the Chicago suburbs. Born and raised burban boy, and damn proud of it.

I just live in Texas now.

Yes. Except chocolate frosting. That part went over very poorly with my stomach.

Sugar free frosting next time maybe? Less sweet might mean more stomachability at higher volumes.

It was a really fun scene during though. I was so fricking high on endorphins that the whole room was laughing. Well, most of the room. There was one guy who mostly seemed confused because all I could do is sit and laugh. I don't think he's seen me scene much though. Everyone else had.

So everyone had enjoyment. And for the confused guy... he'll learn mighty quick. Or he can just go get stoned and understand the whole just sitting and laughing thing. (Not that I condone drug use.)

 

[Keroin]

Watched an interesting documentary. "We Live in Public".

Made me think of Lit.

 

[chy_girl]

I'm not. I'm from the Chicago suburbs. Born and raised burban boy, and damn proud of it.

I just live in Texas now.

See... I can spot em...

So why'd ya go to Texas? It's hot there and they have tornadoes and hurricanes and stuff.

Sugar free frosting next time maybe? Less sweet might mean more stomachability at higher volumes.

It wasn't long after the scene and my stomach was already a bit sensitive. There was far too much sweet in it though. I need to remember to start carrying dark chocolate with me when I scene.

So everyone had enjoyment. And for the confused guy... he'll learn mighty quick. Or he can just go get stoned and understand the whole just sitting and laughing thing. (Not that I condone drug use.)

As far as I remember, he was amused... just not sure what to do with me. In a year I have never seen anyone have the reaction to wax or needles that I do. The needles are new and get a more extreme reaction than the wax, but everyone else had seen me do wax play plenty of times. He'd seen it once.

The fact that I also tend to loose nearly all but a few words (last night I had about 3) and an incoherent sound or two might have played into it.

 

[chy_girl]

Watched an interesting documentary. "We Live in Public".

Made me think of Lit.

Cause there's lots of exhibitionists here?

Just teasing. Was it any good?

 

[DiscusDave]

See... I can spot em...

So why'd ya go to Texas? It's hot there and they have tornadoes and hurricanes and stuff.

Didn't think I was that obvious.

But grad school a'beckons from down here. So down from the Chi-burbo I drove. Right now all I get is the stink of feed lots, and high winds, and I love hot weather. But lets hope the other stuff you mentioned stays away.

... I need to remember to start carrying dark chocolate with me when I scene.

Excelent idea.

The fact that I also tend to loose nearly all but a few words (last night I had about 3) and an incoherent sound or two might have played into it.

Words can be overrated. Inaudible noises are far more expressive in certain contexts.

 

[Cattypuss]

I just mopped my kitchen floor for the first time since August.

Does that make me a bad person or a good person?

 

[Keroin]

Cause there's lots of exhibitionists here?

Just teasing. Was it any good?

Very good. Kind of a look at how the web has affected our lives, through the story of Josh Harris "the greatest internet pioneer you've never heard of". I know I hadn't heard of him. But he posited, waaaaaaay back in the late nineties, that one day people would be "living in public", using the web to share the both the mundane and also highly intimate details of their lives with...everyone. That we would "willingly trade our privacy for the connection and recognition we all deeply desire".

He conducted an experiment with 100 people living together in an underground bunker with zero privacy and cameras on them 24/7 for a month. Fascinating. Guy's a bit loopy but he did have some foresight.