The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

[YoursSINSerely]

and a turkey wishes you hadn't.

I put in a vegan daughter...

and, she learns how to toss your salad.

I put in one hot tomali.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and, she learns how to toss your salad.

I put in one hot tomali.

and you get a free sampler from Little Anita's.

I put in a tumbler of straight mescal...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and you get a free sampler from Little Anita's.

I put in a tumbler of straight mescal...

and, it sparkles in the martini glass.

I put in three olives.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and, it sparkles in the martini glass.

I put in three olives.

and wonder which one will be the lucky one.

I put in a kiss by the Trevi Fountain...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and wonder which one will be the lucky one.

I put in a kiss by the Trevi Fountain...

and, it's a wet one!

I put in a stained collar.

 

[Austin8]

and, it's a wet one!

I put in a stained collar.

spray and wash...

I put in no stained clothing

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

but a mud bath fixes that right up.

I put in silly string...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

but a mud bath fixes that right up.

I put in silly string...

and the court jester ties you up in it.

I put in a book of jokes.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and the court jester ties you up in it.

I put in a book of jokes.

and you get a can of laughter.

I put in a talkative mime...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and you get a can of laughter.

I put in a talkative mime...

and, his hands are working overtime.

I put in a pair of white gloves.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and, his hands are working overtime.

I put in a pair of white gloves.

and Mickey Mouse claims them.

I put in an animated conversation...

 

[Babeslady]

and Mickey Mouse claims them.

I put in an animated conversation...

And you have a fantasic evening with a new friend

I put in a bouncy ball

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

and a dog with OCD demands it to be tossed over and over and over...

I put in a bird feeder...

 

[Tio_Narratore]

and a dog with OCD demands it to be tossed over and over and over...

I put in a bird feeder...

and you get a family of happy squirrels.

I put in a squirrel feeder...

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

and that makes me happy, I'm a squirrely kinda girl.

I put in a black walnut tree...

 

[Erotic-Kiss]

and that makes me happy, I'm a squirrely kinda girl.

I put in a black walnut tree...

And I crack the walnuts and make brownies.

I put in a languid afternoon beside a beautiful beach.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

And I crack the walnuts and make brownies.

I put in a languid afternoon beside a beautiful beach.

and you get a dozen offers to help apply your sun screen.

I put in a languid afternoon on Wreck Beach...

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

and I wonder if you are completely nude, only partially, or clothed.

I put in a jar of peanut butter...

 

[Handley_Page]

and I wonder if you are completely nude, only partially, or clothed.

I put in a jar of peanut butter...

and it goes straight back in for someone else.

I put in a JAR OF APPLE SAUCE

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

regular or unsweetened/no-sugar-added?

I put in something healthier to eat...

 

[Handley_Page]

regular or unsweetened/no-sugar-added?

I put in something healthier to eat...

Having examined its contents list, considered my age and thought about it. I really don't give a damn.

I put in a good cigar

 

[LunaEroticaMystica]

and before you can take a puff, it transforms into a red red rose.

I put in a metal detector...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

and before you can take a puff, it transforms into a red red rose.

I put in a metal detector...

and, it detects a man of steel.

I put in a cape.

 

[Handley_Page]

and, it detects a man of steel.

I put in a cape.

it's just the job for riding a push-bike in the rain.


I put in a new model 8" wheel.

 

[Austin8]

it's just the job for riding a push-bike in the rain.


I put in a new model 8" wheel.

but it rolls right into a trolley barn

I put in a town crier