What do you want from your writing?

[Tzara]

I mean this to be a slightly different question from the typical "why do you write?" which shows up here periodically. And I've deliberatively used the word "writing" rather than "poetry" in case some of the AH types want to comment. Poetry, fiction, plays, whatever—I'm just curious what it is you want from your writing. Partly, I think, I want to know how others feel because I am no longer sure what I want out of my own poems.

I started writing poems reasonably seriously with the idea that writing them would perhaps help me understand reading poems better—particularly poems by contemporary and near-contemporary poets. While I think it's helped somewhat in that regard, I'm generally still pretty clueless in reading, oh, Lowell or Pound or Jorie Graham. But I've learned a lot about poetry, so it has been fairly successful overall.

For a while, I thought a goal was to get some of my poems published, with eventually getting something published in one of the small literary magazines that are the traditional market for poetry. I started out pretty well on that, placing poems with various online journals, but lately I've really lost interest in publication as a goal. I guess I no longer know what the point of it would be.

So I'm kind of adrift at the moment for some kind of goal or meaning to writing. I still do it, because I enjoy it in and of itself, but I've kind of lost whatever reasons I had for doing it as a way of accomplishing something else.

So I'm curious. What do the rest of you want from your writing, if anything? Fame? Fortune? A Pulitzer Prize? Relief from inner demons? Some smooth, sexy lines to use to pick up girls/guys? What?

 

[PandoraGlitters]

A way to make external the internal dialogue--get the voices in my head out.

 

[Tzara]

A way to make external the internal dialogue--get the voices in my head out.

If you don't mind my asking, PG, in what sense do you mean that? Is it something you feel you have to do (kind of like the "I have to write" comment many people say is their reason)? Confession (a la Plath and Sexton)? A way of working out personal issues or problems? (The latter is something I do by walking around the house talking to myself.)

Or is it something else?

I get too caught up in the mechanics of things for confession or working out problems to result in anything but crap poems for me (and nothing that helps with the original motivation), though I quite admire a number of poets who seem to be very good at this. I end up often being jealous of poems of this nature as they seem to be more real or honest than the smarty-pants, jokey things I often write. I don't think it is in my nature to open up about myself, and I think that is a problem for my poems.

Do you feel your poems are successful in "getting the voice in [your] head out?"

 

[Eric_B]

So I'm curious. What do the rest of you want from your writing, if anything? Fame? Fortune? A Pulitzer Prize? Relief from inner demons? Some smooth, sexy lines to use to pick up girls/guys? What?

I would say when it comes to me and poetry its about inner demons.
More accurately its how I say the things I can't say. As a rule I write for a specific reader telling them the things that only make sense as metaphor.

Fiction I write for because I feel I should, I get very little out of the writing process.
When I journal the freedom is what I love the most. No need to think about the words I use, just let it come.
Essays I write for grades, maybe someday I will write something I believe in.


Smooth pickup lines and a Pulitzer would be cool too.

 

[KillerMuffin]

First, I wrote poems to create better fiction. Poetry understands getting to the heart of something and imaging it far, far better than fiction does. Poetry improves fiction so well. It's added dimensions to my prose that I'm totally in love with.

Now, I write poems because I have to finish a poetry thesis and get my my next degree so I can take a break. I have been in college forever. Then, on to PhD land! After a suitable break from homework deadlines and comp exams.

 

[Angeline]

I write because it is the most satisfying way I know of expressing who I am. I love language; I always have and it makes me happy to play with words. I don't really care whether I publish more or not. I just want to keep writing.

 

[Tzara]

I would say when it comes to me and poetry its about inner demons.
More accurately its how I say the things I can't say. As a rule I write for a specific reader telling them the things that only make sense as metaphor.

Fiction I write for because I feel I should, I get very little out of the writing process.
When I journal the freedom is what I love the most. No need to think about the words I use, just let it come.
Essays I write for grades, maybe someday I will write something I believe in.


Smooth pickup lines and a Pulitzer would be cool too.

Hi, Eric. Thanks for the comment.

I didn't mean to be leading your response with that "inner demon" stuff. Just meant that often people say something like that when they talk about writing. Why do you say that when you write poetry it is about inner demons?

And, yeah, I did that essay thing, that grade thing. A while ago, thank God. And I would completely groove on a Pulitzer that left me with smooth pickup lines.

'Cept (oops) I'm married. Well, you can have my lines. (Which aren't all that smooth, actually, anyway.)

 

[Tzara]

First, I wrote poems to create better fiction. Poetry understands getting to the heart of something and imaging it far, far better than fiction does. Poetry improves fiction so well. It's added dimensions to my prose that I'm totally in love with.

Now, I write poems because I have to finish a poetry thesis and get my my next degree so I can take a break. I have been in college forever. Then, on to PhD land! After a suitable break from homework deadlines and comp exams.

I can relate to that dissertation committee crap. Been there, botched that.

Are you/were you writing poems you think aren't true or good or just done to jack you to the next level of academica?

I'd understand that, having personally badly negotiated that pothole-filled mine zone (yeah, yeah, mixed metaphor) grad students live with.

Godspeed, m'dear. Anyway.

 

[hmmnmm]

I'm not in much of a position to be too choosy about what any particular written doohickey chooses to send home. If there is a wordsmithing supernanny she'd not be too impressed; would say I should apply a firmer hand of discipline and more focused, goal-directed guidance. Occasionally one will write back and say they made somebody laugh. That's always nice to hear. Not too many of them are gainfully employed but they're mostly pretty polite and respectful of the communities they end up in. Sure it'd be great if one or two of them could send home some money, but I'm not holding my breath for that.

 

[Tzara]

I write because it is the most satisfying way I know of expressing who I am. I love language; I always have and it makes me happy to play with words. I don't really care whether I publish more or not. I just want to keep writing.

Geez, Angie, that's about as pure an "I just like to write" explanation as I can possibly think of.

I'd be really critical of it except that basically it's how I currently feel.

I mean, jeez. You're supposed to be helping me find some Greater Meaning in all o' this.

How's the weather there, by the way? We have, in Seattle, unsurprisingly, rain.

 

[Tzara]

I'm not in much of a position to be too choosy about what any particular written doohickey chooses to send home. If there is a wordsmithing supernanny she'd not be too impressed; would say I should apply a firmer hand of discipline and more focused, goal-directed guidance. Occasionally one will write back and say they made somebody laugh. That's always nice to hear. Not too many of them are gainfully employed but they're mostly pretty polite and respectful of the communities they end up in. Sure it'd be great if one or two of them could send home some money, but I'm not holding my breath for that.

Money for poetry?

Um,

Tick

Tick

Tick

Hey. Probably not going to happen. Sorry, Timhmmnmm.

Is there something we can do about that?

I know, I know. Leading the witness.

 

[Angeline]

Geez, Angie, that's about as pure an "I just like to write" explanation as I can possibly think of.

I'd be really critical of it except that basically it's how I currently feel.

I mean, jeez. You're supposed to be helping me find some Greater Meaning in all o' this.

How's the weather there, by the way? We have, in Seattle, unsurprisingly, rain.

What greater meaning could one possibly need?

It took me a while to realize that's all I want from writing: to keep doing it. For a few years I was making myself crazy about publishing. I did get some decent acceptances, but I began to realize that I was putting lots of time and energy into trying to get published that I could have put into writing (and reading/thinking). I had a similar experience with doing the mod thing here: too much time and effort on other people's stuff and not enough on mine. I may want to try to publish again at some point just as I may want to teach again (I've done a lot of teaching over the years) someday, but really I'm happy just writing. And even before you started this thread, I've sensed you felt the same.

Asheville is gorgeous. Almost every day is paradisical. The color on the mountains now is amazing. We are very happy here. I am a little nervous though because I'm going to switch my driver's license tomorrow and I just found out I have to pass a written test. Gawd, I haven't taken a driver's test in um a really long time. Wish me luck. <anxious emote>

 

[KillerMuffin]

I can relate to that dissertation committee crap. Been there, botched that.

Are you/were you writing poems you think aren't true or good or just done to jack you to the next level of academica?

I was writing poems that I liked and thought were good, but apparently my thesis advisor has decided they're boring and I have to write differently. I can't tell if it's because she's tired of a variety of poems on similar subjects or because she's right. Actually, I don't think she knows the difference.

I'd understand that, having personally badly negotiated that pothole-filled mine zone (yeah, yeah, mixed metaphor) grad students live with.

Godspeed, m'dear. Anyway.

Thank you! May is my month. Well, comps in summer, but after May, I will be blissed out.

 

[hmmnmm]

Money for poetry?

Um,

Tick

Tick

Tick

Hey. Probably not going to happen. Sorry, Timhmmnmm.

Is there something we can do about that?

I know, I know. Leading the witness.

Brother can you spare some opium?

 

[Eric_B]

Why do you say that when you write poetry it is about inner demons?

You ask a lot. To convey a feeling in words is a task of epic proportion.
"Inner demons" fits only in the aspect that my emotions feel like wicked little demons tormenting me into dubious behavior with promises of pleasure.

I don't have the words so I will steal from Susanne Langer on her interpretation of art.
"and what it expresses is human feeling."

That is was I believe when I write, I am putting what I know about human feeling into metaphors. I want to make my reader feel the same core pounding emotions I do.

 

[greenmountaineer]

Geez, Angie, that's about as pure an "I just like to write" explanation as I can possibly think of.

I'd be really critical of it except that basically it's how I currently feel.

I mean, jeez. You're supposed to be helping me find some Greater Meaning in all o' this.

I like Angeline's answer. I too like language; love its nuances.

I also write to find some Greater Meaning but probably delude myself in the process because there's still a question mark at the end of it, although a wonderful one. I'm not smart enough to figure it out. I don't believe anyone is. In spite of the pain and suffering of life, I remain in awe of it and attempt to express that in poetry.

 

[butters]

What greater meaning could one possibly need?

It took me a while to realize that's all I want from writing: to keep doing it. For a few years I was making myself crazy about publishing. I did get some decent acceptances, but I began to realize that I was putting lots of time and energy into trying to get published that I could have put into writing (and reading/thinking). I had a similar experience with doing the mod thing here: too much time and effort on other people's stuff and not enough on mine. I may want to try to publish again at some point just as I may want to teach again (I've done a lot of teaching over the years) someday, but really I'm happy just writing. And even before you started this thread, I've sensed you felt the same.

Asheville is gorgeous. Almost every day is paradisical. The color on the mountains now is amazing. We are very happy here. I am a little nervous though because I'm going to switch my driver's license tomorrow and I just found out I have to pass a written test. Gawd, I haven't taken a driver's test in um a really long time. Wish me luck. <anxious emote>

good luck with your test, Angeline

 

[butters]

currently, i don't think there's anything i want from my poetry other than for it to be what it meant best to be... just to see it exist, independent, not requiring my hand any more.

i used to think in terms of a book - well, maybe maybe one day. i've read so many poets of such calibre that the thought of a book with only my writing in it seems an old conceit. i suppose i simply want to read them (my poems) and be content - anyone else reading them and enjoying them is icing on the cake right now.

 

[PandoraGlitters]

If you don't mind my asking, PG, in what sense do you mean that? Is it something you feel you have to do (kind of like the "I have to write" comment many people say is their reason)? Confession (a la Plath and Sexton)? A way of working out personal issues or problems? (The latter is something I do by walking around the house talking to myself.)

Or is it something else? . . .

Do you feel your poems are successful in "getting the voice in [your] head out?"

It isn't anything I have to do (as evidenced by the fact that I went recently for a good month or two without writing a single poem and I was just fine) but rather that it is a good way for me to channel the my internal dialogue into something concrete so that I can really look at it a little and figure out how I feel about things. That is why I write. It is not, however, why I edit, which is a whole other question.

 

[fridayam]

To be read.

 

[Tzara]

What greater meaning could one possibly need?

It took me a while to realize that's all I want from writing: to keep doing it. For a few years I was making myself crazy about publishing. I did get some decent acceptances, but I began to realize that I was putting lots of time and energy into trying to get published that I could have put into writing (and reading/thinking). I had a similar experience with doing the mod thing here: too much time and effort on other people's stuff and not enough on mine. I may want to try to publish again at some point just as I may want to teach again (I've done a lot of teaching over the years) someday, but really I'm happy just writing. And even before you started this thread, I've sensed you felt the same.

I had the idea at one point that getting published was some indication that your poem was "good," with the additional idea that getting published in "better" places (online, better online, print journal, Ploughshares, The New Yorker) meant meant that you were progressing from "good" to "really good."

I'm not sure I don't still believe that, but I'm also not sure it matters to me any more.

What matters to me, I think, is that I write a poem I'm thoroughly satisfied with. Which I haven't yet done and haven't yet come close to.

I'd like to teach at some point. I have taught various things computerese (and psychology, many years ago), but I would like to teach writing at some point. So good luck on doing that.

Asheville is gorgeous. Almost every day is paradisical. The color on the mountains now is amazing. We are very happy here. I am a little nervous though because I'm going to switch my driver's license tomorrow and I just found out I have to pass a written test. Gawd, I haven't taken a driver's test in um a really long time. Wish me luck. <anxious emote>

The one and only written drivers' test I took was pretty close to 42 years ago. I would hate to take it again.

Good luck.

 

[champagne1982]

To be read.

I'm on the other side of that...


to be written.

It's likely got to do with this silliness of business and accounting that I'm currently eyeball deep in right now. Although, the upswing is that I've gotten some very good marks on my midterms. So I'm happy, but still not writing poetry. Dammit.

 

[Tzara]

I was writing poems that I liked and thought were good, but apparently my thesis advisor has decided they're boring and I have to write differently. I can't tell if it's because she's tired of a variety of poems on similar subjects or because she's right. Actually, I don't think she knows the difference.

One of the things I have thought of doing in my retirement (assuming I get to have a retirement) is to work on an MFA in poetry writing. (I also want to learn Norwegian, learn to play competent Go, and travel, but those are non-poeticisms.) One of the things I worry about that (besides the money thing) is whether it would help me write better poems. I am not convinced that it will, in part because I don't see how it would do anything other than get you to write poems acceptable to your MFA advisor(s).

I mean, I know that's how grad school works. It's no different in any other discipline, but I'm not persuaded, I guess, that MFA faculty members really know how to write good poems themselves, and even if they do, whether they know how to recognize (or help) someone who writes good poetry in a very different style or aesthetic to their own.

Anyway. Just a complaint.

 

[Tzara]

Brother can you spare some opium?

For fifty or a hundred bucks a gram, sure.

 

[Tzara]

You ask a lot. To convey a feeling in words is a task of epic proportion.
"Inner demons" fits only in the aspect that my emotions feel like wicked little demons tormenting me into dubious behavior with promises of pleasure.

I don't have the words so I will steal from Susanne Langer on her interpretation of art.
"and what it expresses is human feeling."

That is was I believe when I write, I am putting what I know about human feeling into metaphors. I want to make my reader feel the same core pounding emotions I do.

Yes, of course. But what do you want your writing to do for you?

I'm not asking what you want it to do to/invoke in your readers. I want to know what you want to get out of it yourself. Control (over your readers)? Money? Fame? Pleasure in the act itself?

What?