Question for bi-men and/or female partners of bi-men

[Yourneighbor]

Do you find yourselves more apt or prone to have sex with other men if a female is present?

I understand that's a rather nebulous question so let me explain a bit if I may.

For me, I've basically had one M-M experience (actually two, but I'll get to that). The situation was actually with two couples, myself and my girlfriend and a married couple.

The first night with the other couple I detailed in the "first time" thread above, several months after that the four of us had occasion to get together again, but it was slightly different. The married couple had expressed a desire to be with us each separately - the girls together in one bedroom, the guys together in another. The girls seemed quite content with this arrangement, but I was actually not very comfortable at all and very little happened. It was the first time in my life where a willing sexual partner was at hand and I was just *not* into it at all... my mind or heart betrayed my body for once and not the other way around.

Now, I am single - never been married - no present girlfriends, and there are plenty of opportunities for me to go to gay clubs and the like and I would likely find someone there for some sort of encounter, but that is just not my cup of tea.

For me it seems like I have to have a woman involved, even if I am not particularly getting it on with her or anything like that, she has to be there and involved at least verbally and emotionally if not physically. I can very easily imagine myself as the 3rd wheel with a M-F couple in which I have no sexual physical contact with the woman, or with my own female partner (if I had one currently) and a 3rd wheel other man, even if there were no M-F physical acts going on and all the sex was M-M. I also can't seem to muster any desire to be alone with a transgendered person or transvestite.

I have fantasized for years about having a female partner setting up M-M sex with me and someone else, even more than one other man, but never without her being in the room and/or having some role - doesn't have to be physical.

I suppose it's my own hangup, but do many/any of you others out there find yourselves in the same mindset about it? Is this feeling common?

 

[satinmarabana]

I've had three relevant experiences. In each, I started a relationship with a man who was also a sissy (wear lingerie, submissive). In each case, the sexplay eventually got to the point where they were sucking my strapon and 'receiving' it regularly. They each wanted to try the real thing but if I made it happen and was in charge. They all liked sucking cock and having a real cock take them. One eventually stopped because he felt disturbed about the experience. The other enjoyed going that far and no farther. The last one eventually broke up with me and recently was married to another man.

All of them wanted me to be the catalyst or facilitator to their gay sex. And I was happy to do it.

 

[Yourneighbor]

I've had three relevant experiences. In each, I started a relationship with a man who was also a sissy (wear lingerie, submissive). In each case, the sexplay eventually got to the point where they were sucking my strapon and 'receiving' it regularly. They each wanted to try the real thing but if I made it happen and was in charge. They all liked sucking cock and having a real cock take them. One eventually stopped because he felt disturbed about the experience. The other enjoyed going that far and no farther. The last one eventually broke up with me and recently was married to another man.

All of them wanted me to be the catalyst or facilitator to their gay sex. And I was happy to do it.

Interesting! Thank you for the reply.

A question for you if I may:

Did you feel betrayed/disappoined/any other negative emotion with the outcome of facilitating their desires? You said you enjoyed the events, but did the aftermath bother you? Did you ever wish you had never done it? How about when the one partner left you and married another man?

I ask because many female partners I've spoken to or hinted around about this topic expressed a fear that their partner would "go gay" and leave them.

 

[Riley_James]

Do you find yourselves more apt or prone to have sex with other men if a female is present?

I understand that's a rather nebulous question so let me explain a bit if I may.

For me, I've basically had one M-M experience (actually two, but I'll get to that). The situation was actually with two couples, myself and my girlfriend and a married couple.

The first night with the other couple I detailed in the "first time" thread above, several months after that the four of us had occasion to get together again, but it was slightly different. The married couple had expressed a desire to be with us each separately - the girls together in one bedroom, the guys together in another. The girls seemed quite content with this arrangement, but I was actually not very comfortable at all and very little happened. It was the first time in my life where a willing sexual partner was at hand and I was just *not* into it at all... my mind or heart betrayed my body for once and not the other way around.

Now, I am single - never been married - no present girlfriends, and there are plenty of opportunities for me to go to gay clubs and the like and I would likely find someone there for some sort of encounter, but that is just not my cup of tea.

For me it seems like I have to have a woman involved, even if I am not particularly getting it on with her or anything like that, she has to be there and involved at least verbally and emotionally if not physically. I can very easily imagine myself as the 3rd wheel with a M-F couple in which I have no sexual physical contact with the woman, or with my own female partner (if I had one currently) and a 3rd wheel other man, even if there were no M-F physical acts going on and all the sex was M-M. I also can't seem to muster any desire to be alone with a transgendered person or transvestite.

I have fantasized for years about having a female partner setting up M-M sex with me and someone else, even more than one other man, but never without her being in the room and/or having some role - doesn't have to be physical.

I suppose it's my own hangup, but do many/any of you others out there find yourselves in the same mindset about it? Is this feeling common?

Let me share my experiences with you a little and see if it helps you to understand your feelings. I am not a psychologist, but am a 45 y.o. married bisexual woman who has been in the swingers community for five years. I love playing with bi men, I don't know why...although I have some ideas, but bi guys just turn me on. I'm what they refer to as a switch in the bdsm community, I mostly Domme guys and girls, but for the right person I will sub.

I have encountered lots of men who have fantasies about sucking cock and even getting fucked by a hot throbbing member, but can't seem to get past the "idea" that has been battered into them by society that it's wrong for them to want that. What makes it easier for them (okay or permissible) is for a woman to be present. I've taken I don't know how many men's anal virginity on the road to them having their first cock. In my world, rimming, fingering and playing with toys in a guys ass is an ultimate turn on. It has to do with transfer of power, a little penis envy and just a huge liberal attitude toward sex in genreal on my part.

If you have any questions for me, shoot a PM, I'll share any info you'd like to hear.

Mistress Riley

 

[lindahotstuff]

I agree with Mistress Riley. I enjoy seeing my husband suck another guy's cock or be sucked when we are in a 3sum or 4sum. But hubby just isn't interested in seeing a guy without me being there. For us, the bi side is what makes sex so erotic. We find it difficult in a 3/4sum not to do this. And in our experience the majority of genuine swingers are bi.
Anal is a bit different. Hubby doesn't want anything up his bum, whether it's my finger, or a toy and certainly not someone's cock. He has arse fucked another guy who really wanted it (in a 3sum), but it's not his thing really. He arse fucks me sometimes, and I enjoy it thoroughly, but he only does it for me really, he much prefers my tight pussy.

 

[Wolf of Mibu 69]

As a guy who's just beginning to explore his bi side, I will say that having a woman involved definitely heats the scene up immensely! I love performing for a woman. With that said, when I'm in the mood to experiment, I don't actually need there to be a woman present.

 

[klippert]

I have chronicled some of the experiences with Gil & Marie. It took all of three months for Gil and I to hook up after work. All the while the suduction was for me and my GF at the time. Marie luv'd watching M/M when it was MMF, we tried to give her all the pleasure, we paid as much attention to her as we could but their was plenty of M/M contact......

 

[Rider500]

.........

 

[smooth-boy]

All of them wanted me to be the catalyst or facilitator to their gay sex. And I was happy to do it.

This sounds like a lot of fun to me.

 

[nitoc88]

ny male here and this is my biggest fatnasy. I have never done anything with a guy but if a woman would be there to guide me I would in a minute. so anyone woman int he ny nj area in to this please help me.

 

[monkeyslap7]

yes

this might help

my sexy GF invited my friend Tim to the house after we closed the restaurant one night. after some drinks, etc - we ended up naked and in an equal opportunity love making session, complete with oral sex, penetrating fingers and pee play for everybody I would have never done that without her help and prompting.

shoot, it was so much fun, i'd do it again!

jc

 

[erotikfriktion]

Well although I kind of 'forced' myself into exploring a bisexual side a few years back, I knew then that I had some way of separating 'love for sex' from 'sexuality'. Basically, I've never experienced the slightest attraction to another male but enjoyed two one-to-one experiences I decided I must have on an adventurous tip. The novelty quickly faded but then I started to think about MMF scenarios intermittently and just now the thought of them has returned to the forefornt. My previous GF was really into the idea but, experienced in MFF situations (which she was also into), I always said 'I'm not sure that it can work if it doesnt happen spontaneously' (as all mine had).
Now I'm with a new girlfriend who recently reveealed that she once worked as a call girl during college and experienced all kinds of situations (I havent pressed for details as yet!), I'm finding MMF stories the hottest thing for my imagination right now.

But the big problem is that just dont fancy any guys...like ever. Previous girlfriend would occasionally try to get me interested by saying 'What about him?' and I'd just go off the whole idea.
I think sex is one thing for me and attraction is another which is why I'm even finding that I have to search in a Bi-MMF sectio for a specific story that will conform to this kind of 'I like the idea cocks but not the idea of the guys they're attached to'.

I think I'm possibly heading for Straponsville...but what do others have to say on experience of this?

 

[little cletus]

I have no desire to do anything with another man, unless my wife was there. Her directing the action is what makes it hot.

 

[JustABitKinky]

This is definitely a fantasy of mine. The fantasy always includes a woman present. I think for me there isn't really an actual attraction to men individually. So, being alone with a guy and trying to create something just won't work.

The turn on for me is if she were to be excited by the bisexual 'taboo' interaction and she encourages it. It would I guess be more about the pleasure it brings her than me which in turn would excite me.

I think it's also a product of being submissive. Having her 'direct' me as mentioned above is the root of the turn on.

 

[smooth-boy]

This is definitely a fantasy of mine. The fantasy always includes a woman present. I think for me there isn't really an actual attraction to men individually. So, being alone with a guy and trying to create something just won't work.

The turn on for me is if she were to be excited by the bisexual 'taboo' interaction and she encourages it. It would I guess be more about the pleasure it brings her than me which in turn would excite me.

I think it's also a product of being submissive. Having her 'direct' me as mentioned above is the root of the turn on.

For me it is a product of being submissive. I think I can do it one on one, but having a girl there would be a great experience.

 

[Palba_Noruda]

I prefer to be with a woman or a man but would not like to mix them.

For one thing, when I'm with a guy, I most likely am wanting to feel pretty and feminine, and that would be more difficult with somebody prettier and more feminine in the room.

And when I'm with a woman, I'm in a very different mindset. I think basically if I had a woman and a man at the same time, I would be very confused

 

[infinity706]

Do you find yourselves more apt or prone to have sex with other men if a female is present?

I understand that's a rather nebulous question so let me explain a bit if I may.

For me, I've basically had one M-M experience (actually two, but I'll get to that). The situation was actually with two couples, myself and my girlfriend and a married couple.

The first night with the other couple I detailed in the "first time" thread above, several months after that the four of us had occasion to get together again, but it was slightly different. The married couple had expressed a desire to be with us each separately - the girls together in one bedroom, the guys together in another. The girls seemed quite content with this arrangement, but I was actually not very comfortable at all and very little happened. It was the first time in my life where a willing sexual partner was at hand and I was just *not* into it at all... my mind or heart betrayed my body for once and not the other way around.

Now, I am single - never been married - no present girlfriends, and there are plenty of opportunities for me to go to gay clubs and the like and I would likely find someone there for some sort of encounter, but that is just not my cup of tea.

For me it seems like I have to have a woman involved, even if I am not particularly getting it on with her or anything like that, she has to be there and involved at least verbally and emotionally if not physically. I can very easily imagine myself as the 3rd wheel with a M-F couple in which I have no sexual physical contact with the woman, or with my own female partner (if I had one currently) and a 3rd wheel other man, even if there were no M-F physical acts going on and all the sex was M-M. I also can't seem to muster any desire to be alone with a transgendered person or transvestite.

I have fantasized for years about having a female partner setting up M-M sex with me and someone else, even more than one other man, but never without her being in the room and/or having some role - doesn't have to be physical.

I suppose it's my own hangup, but do many/any of you others out there find yourselves in the same mindset about it? Is this feeling common?

It's extremely common. Most likely, what you should do if it happens again, is to just explain the situation to everyone involved. I doubt it would cause too much objection to everything happening in the same room.

 

[wonderingdude]

Absolutely.

Do you find yourselves more apt or prone to have sex with other men if a female is present?

That's one of my hottest fantasies. When I see MFF and the second girl has her mouth on them while they fuck, I get jealous of her!

 

[Stella_Omega]

My primary partner is a guy, and we've had a few MFM encounters. In every case, he'll be just as involved with the other guy as that other guy is comfortable with, if you see what I mean. He's even given a guy a blowjob.

But he is totally uninterested in men unless I'm there!

 

[blade_rocknut]

My primary partner is a guy, and we've had a few MFM encounters. In every case, he'll be just as involved with the other guy as that other guy is comfortable with, if you see what I mean. He's even given a guy a blowjob.

But he is totally uninterested in men unless I'm there!

Stella, you seem to have a profound effect on him
That must be a heckuva rush; to think that your very presence alters someone else's sexual preferences! Even as contorted as my situation is, I don't think my wife could talk me into doing something like that, but who knows- she hasn't tried

 

[jefb10]

I'm a bisexual man who loves sex with both women and men. My ultimate goal is to share an awesome cock and his sweet tasting cum with my beautiful g/f C. and then make love to every inch of her body. So much looking forward to it.