My Very First Story

[Kitkat103]

Okay so I am still waiting approval on my story but here it is as for the illustration go here

All feedback would be appreciated. I am a little worried since i have yet to hear back from Lit.

In a nutshell woman masturbates while boyfriend is supposedly working late.


The Benefits of Plasma Television


MaloMarz6969 – Lol what a freaking idiot. So what are you up to?
Sbarron85 – Just waiting for Matt at his place. He is supposed to be working late.
MaloMarz6969 – Aha. I did not know that office drones had to work so late, honey its 11pm!
Sbarron85 – I know that, what are you implying?
MaloMarz6969- Well I think he is out too late to just be desk jockeying.
Sbarron85 – Well I trust Matt so kaput 4 your theory. What are you up to aside from prying into my personal life?
MaloMarz6969 – I'm on this online forum and I'm just deliberately fucking with these people. There is one guy who is like bitching about these stories people submit. He keeps bitching and moaning about transsexuals so I am uploading these disturbing pictures of cross dressers and post op tranny women who look like men but have a vagina.
Sbarron85 – Wow that is incredibly sad. Weird because you are the biggest pussy I know
MaloMarz6969– The power of the internet, chica
Sbarron85 – Okay I will leave you to it then
MaloMarz6969 – Sharon, Wait! B4 you go I want to show you something
Sbarron85 – Marla, Please no creepy tranny pics. I have to work in the morning and I need some sleep.
MaloMarz 6969 – Relax it’s not that, check this out, you can’t tell me this is not hot.

Sharon waited impatiently as Marla uploaded the photo to the chat window. She knew it would be an arousing picture but did not know how so. The thought of another post op tranny picture made Sharon recoil. She began to toss her red tresses with her hand as she watched the photo sharing applet load. Times like these she wished Matt would pay for broadband instead of having to siphon a wireless connection from the local pastry chain store.

Just then Marla’s file transfer was complete. Sharon opened the file using her local paint program. To her surprise she let out a moan. The image she saw in front of her was absolutely beautiful. The image depicted two Asian lesbians, naked and covered in body oil engaging in a sensual embrace. Although they were just embracing each other, the looks on their faces were of pure ecstasy and bliss.

The image aroused Sharon in many ways. She had longed to have sex with another woman
But she loved Matt dearly and did not want to end their relationship. But Sharon longed to engage in a lesbian tryst with her best friend Marla.

Marla was a voluptuous curvy Latina that Sharon had known since High School. Sharon found Marla to be so very sexy but she was always in her own world. Although she could be selfish at times, she was very endearing and reliable. Sharon once considered finding an NSA partner online, but who would be a better choice, some woman you found on a classified ad website or your busty best friend that you have known for years? Sharon was scared to ask Marla in fear that it would ruin their friendship. What if she does not feel the same way? It would be hard to associate with each other after such a proposition.


If you made it this far, thanks

Sharon continued to admire the image. The oiled bosom of both women and the looks of pleasure on their faces made Sharon tingle. She was so entranced by their loveliness she had to push the computer chair away from the desk. She stood up and walked to Matt’s bedroom where she left her purse. She grabbed her mp3 player and quickly returned to the computer. She plugged it in and then synchronized the image to her mp3 player. With quickness Sharon practically leapt to the living room. There she plugged the mp3 player into the plasma television. Matt purchased the television for the Super bowl with intentions of returning it. One of his friends spilled a beer on the television so the return policy was null and void. He was now stuck with 56 inch plasma that he watched only twice a week.

After the light touching of the click wheel Sharon was greeted with the large image of the two women. She left the image on repeat as she made her way to the couch. The women were so gorgeous. It stirred up feelings of yearning that Sharon had hid inside of her. Aching to be touched by Marla, to feel her breasts pressed against her back. Her lips on her neck as she kissed her ever so gently. Her hands making their way down her sides, cupping her petite breasts, squeezing her nipples as Sharon moaned.

As these thoughts raced through her head Sharon removed her clothes. She reclined back onto the couch and spread her legs, leaving her left leg to dangle on the couch arm. Sharon gently stroked her legs, pretending that it was Marla touching her milky white skin softly, each touch sending waves of electric energy up her spine. Marla would start nibbling on her ear as she slowly dragged her fingertips up Sharon’s leg to her thigh. Then Marla would trace little circles on her small thighs as she made her way into her moist area, rubbing her engorged clit until she came in waves.

Sharon moaned deeply as she dragged her fingertips along her inner thigh, thinking of all the dirty things Marla could do to her. The more she thought about Marla, the wetter she became and could not take the teasing anymore. She gently rubbed her lips and spread her legs wider until her clit was visible enough for her to see in her seating position. Her pussy was red from anticipation and glistening with cum from just thinking about her buxom best friend. Sharon dipped her right fingers in her sweet little honey pot and rubbed the juices over her swollen clit. It felt so good and refreshing she stuck her fingers in deeply, trying to reach her sweet spot.

With success Sharon groaned passionately as she felt her fingers touching that bean like spot. She stopped squeezing her small breasts with her left hand and furiously rubbed her clit as she stimulated her g-spot. Images of Marla fucking her with a strap on, licking her clit rapidly flashed through Sharon’s head. Making her clit swell, her tight hole pulse. She wished she had bought one of her toys over; it would have been so hot to have something up her bum as she feverishly pumped her fingers in and out of her pussy.

Sharon stopped feeding her pussy her fingers and pulled them out to see the reward. They were glistening and covered in that savory juice. She rubbed those delicious juices over her nipples, loving the feeling that minor massage was giving her, wishing that she was feeding this delicious nectar with Marla. Sharon tasted it, so fucking good; too bad it has to go to waste. Sharon returned to rubbing her clit with that moist hand and then slowly guided two of her fingers back into her pussy with her thumb against her clit.

“Oh my gosh, this feels so fucking good!” Sharon shouted. Her throbbing love canal was tightening around her fingers; her chest was getting very red with passion. Her breathing became more labored as wave after wave of orgasmic pleasure tried to release itself from her repressed body. Sharon furiously rubbed her clit with four fingers; her labia had become juicy and too slippery for two fingers. Sharon let out a loud yelp as she felt her muscles tighten and contract, the couch becoming soaked underneath her.

Drenched in sweat Sharon moved her leg from the couch arm and laid down. She was completely spent. While enjoying her afterglow Sharon heard a thud. Matt stood in the doorway with bags of groceries; he dropped one of them at the sight of Sharon, nude and sweaty on his couch.

Sharon abruptly tried to put her clothes on but Matt walked across the living room to her. He grabbed her hand as she was trying to button up her skirt. Sharon looked at Matt quizzically.
“Babe, how long have you been standing in the doorway?” Sharon asked.
“Long enough.” Matt replied. He grabbed her hand and guided it to the bulging hard-on that was poking through his slacks; Sharon hesitated, and then smiled…..


If you made it this far thanks for reading!

 

[CWatson]

I sense the hand of business English.

Your prose is straightforward and, to be perfectly honest, a little clumsy. There's no artistry in it. I realize I'm one to talk, as my prose is largely pedestrian as well, but at least I manage to avoid major roadbumps.

Sharon was scared to ask Marla in fear that it would ruin their friendship. What if she does not feel the same way? It would be hard to associate with each other after such a proposition.

I assume the middle sentence is meant to be an actual thought, narrated out of Sharon's head. If so, you need to mark it out as such somehow; the standard way is to italicize them. (I've only read one author, Orson Scott Card, who just renders them in straight prose.)

She was so entranced by their loveliness she had to push the computer chair away from the desk. She stood up and walked to Matt’s bedroom where she left her purse. She grabbed her mp3 player and quickly returned to the computer. She plugged it in and then synchronized the image to her mp3 player. With quickness Sharon practically leapt to the living room. There she plugged the mp3 player into the plasma television.

The problem here is repetitive phrasing. "She did this, she did that," almost the entire paragraph. And "With quickness"? Not only is that an unnecessary statement, in light of the practical leaping, but... I mean, what are you, an 18th-century British poet?

Long story short, I feel like you're trying too hard, especially when the sex starts. The descriptions are loud and frantic, as if you're trying to make up for technique with noise. (Or as if you're a virgin and only have porn to reference. If that's the case, I forgive you; but, as someone who is in the exact same boat, let me assure you that it's possible to do better. ) Relax. Don't work so hard. Let it flow, let it be honest and natural instead of slathered in make-up and overwrought descriptions.

And remember of course that every reader is different. Don't just listen to me; listen to what everybody says and take it all into account. And, of course, discard any advice you disagree with. You're The Writer; it's your job to make decisions, and ours only to tell you what effects those decisions had on us.

Hope this helps!

 

[Kitkat103]

I sense the hand of business English.

Your prose is straightforward and, to be perfectly honest, a little clumsy. There's no artistry in it. I realize I'm one to talk, as my prose is largely pedestrian as well, but at least I manage to avoid major roadbumps.

I assume the middle sentence is meant to be an actual thought, narrated out of Sharon's head. If so, you need to mark it out as such somehow; the standard way is to italicize them. (I've only read one author, Orson Scott Card, who just renders them in straight prose.)


The problem here is repetitive phrasing. "She did this, she did that," almost the entire paragraph. And "With quickness"? Not only is that an unnecessary statement, in light of the practical leaping, but... I mean, what are you, an 18th-century British poet?

Long story short, I feel like you're trying too hard, especially when the sex starts. The descriptions are loud and frantic, as if you're trying to make up for technique with noise. (Or as if you're a virgin and only have porn to reference. If that's the case, I forgive you; but, as someone who is in the exact same boat, let me assure you that it's possible to do better. ) Relax. Don't work so hard. Let it flow, let it be honest and natural instead of slathered in make-up and overwrought descriptions.

And remember of course that every reader is different. Don't just listen to me; listen to what everybody says and take it all into account. And, of course, discard any advice you disagree with. You're The Writer; it's your job to make decisions, and ours only to tell you what effects those decisions had on us.

Hope this helps!

Thanks for the feedback it was very useful. I wish I had done this before I submitted the story. Hopefully it will be rejected and I can work on it.

 

[amy1969]

didn't really understand the first parts references about transvestites ?? and then wanting to have a lesbian affair ?? Did I miss something.
I think maybe the story line would be clearer if it was more straightforward on exactly what the topic was. i liked some of the adverbs but language was a bit stilted ?? - Just all my simple opinions/ observations.

 

[Kitkat103]

didn't really understand the first parts references about transvestites ?? and then wanting to have a lesbian affair ?? Did I miss something.
I think maybe the story line would be clearer if it was more straightforward on exactly what the topic was. i liked some of the adverbs but language was a bit stilted ?? - Just all my simple opinions/ observations.

And they are greatly appreciated. The beginning was actually a reference to the general board but I guess I was the only one that got it. One does not realize the many mistakes in their story until others point that out. Now I really hope that this story gets rejected.

 

[amy1969]

And they are greatly appreciated. The beginning was actually a reference to the general board but I guess I was the only one that got it. One does not realize the many mistakes in their story until others point that out. Now I really hope that this story gets rejected.

If you don't like it, you can always edit even after it is accepted. I admire you for going forward. I have one that is out there and I just stalled on it for several months.
I got a lot of comments and advice- some pretty harsh ( but well intended) .. After I read comments and reread my drafts, I got too lazy to fix things- but I keep telling myself I will edit it and get it done.
I wish you every success.and more !

 

[_Lynn_]

Okay so I am still waiting approval . . . I am a little worried since i have yet to hear back from Lit.

How long ago did you submit the piece? And what does it say next to the title on your submission page?

 

[KillerMuffin]

Illustrated stories take quite some time to post, measured in weeks, not days.

Some helpful hints:
1) Do not click the pending link once you've submitted the story, unless you really need to edit the story! Clicking the link sends it to the end of the line and quite potentially out of the editor's "to do" range when illustrated day comes around. Clicking it just to check only sends it to the back of the line every time you hit submit. You can keep the editor from seeing it.

2) You can edit a submitted, but unapproved story by clicking the pending link. Just be aware of the consequences.

3) Read this: http://www.literotica.com/faq/05238710.shtml#06028542
Your image may not pass muster. It looks like someone else took the picture and you photoshopped it. Also, the image may be considered hardcore, so it may be rejected. How can you tell? Check out other illustrated to stories and see what kinds of images have been accepted for publication.

 

[Kitkat103]

How long ago did you submit the piece? And what does it say next to the title on your submission page?

I submitted this story nearly a week ago. It says there are twelve views and the status is "awaiting approval" and pending in the blue letters I have clicked that pending so many times, it explains why I have been waiting! Also I had submitted my document as a microsoft word file.

I did realize after submitting my story how offensive my image may be to the moderators.

 

[KillerMuffin]

I submitted this story nearly a week ago. It says there are twelve views and the status is "awaiting approval" and pending in the blue letters I have clicked that pending so many times, it explains why I have been waiting! Also I had submitted my document as a microsoft word file.

I did realize after submitting my story how offensive my image may be to the moderators.

It's not about offensive. It's about the law. It's against the law to use other people's work without their permission and then publish it. People do it all the time, but Literotica is well open to lawsuits, so they don't do that. They also have a line they have to walk about content, apparently, so how explicit the image is, is important. "Hardcore" is different than "softcore" from a legal standpoint. Literotica not only has to deal with US law, where the owners are based, and US law where the servers are physically based, but international law where the readers are based.

People get up in arms over decisions people make, such as the decision to have no sexual acts involving persons under the age of 18 (even though the law in most places has no real rulings against fictional characters doing so, at this point), but these decisions are usually made for a reason.

 

[RedJohnny]

Kitkat -

I'll second the comments on overly formal language. Their initial online conversation between Sharon and Marla had elements of "text speak" that gave it an element of realism, but also an element of the formality that others have noted that made it seem a little stilted. That's not to say that you can't have someone who speaks formally. The online comic Questionable Content has a character who didn't use contractions when she spoke, unless she was drunk. It was an affectation of her persona, and other characters commented on it. If you're going to do something that's non-standard like that, it's ok, you just need to accept it and make it part of the story.

Going through it in more detail:

MaloMarz6969 – Lol what a freaking idiot. So what are you up to?
Sbarron85 – Just waiting for Matt at his place. He is supposed to be working late. (RJ - The fact that she says "supposed to be working late" is inconsistent with her later assertion that she trusts him. For example, my wife is out of the house right now. If I believe she's at her yoga class, I would say, "She's at yoga." If I'm supicious of her activities, I would say, "She's supposed to be at yoga.")
MaloMarz6969 – Aha. I did not know that office drones had to work so late, honey its 11pm! (RJ - To me, a more realistic phrasing would be, "Aha. Didn't know that ...)
Sbarron85 – I know that, what are you implying?
MaloMarz6969- Well I think he is out too late to just be desk jockeying.
Sbarron85 – Well I trust Matt so kaput 4 your theory. What are you up to aside from prying into my personal life? (RJ - To me, this was a realistically written line. I liked the use of "kaput 4 your theory" - it adds realistic color to the dialog.)
MaloMarz6969 – I'm on this online forum and I'm just deliberately fucking with these people. There is one guy who is like bitching about these stories people submit. He keeps bitching and moaning about transsexuals so I am uploading these disturbing pictures of cross dressers and post op tranny women who look like men but have a vagina. (RJ - "disturbing" doesn't ring true, and nor does "vagina". Marla might say "gross" or "freaky" or use another adjective (or not, it isn't really necessary), but "disturbing" just isn't really a word that feels right - it's too formal. The same is true for the use of "vagina" but the point I made up above about doing something unusual still applies. You could use "vagina" and have Sharon mock her - i.e., "Vagina?!? Who says "vagina"?" and you could use that as an opportunity for some character exposition for Marla - i.e., give a couple of flirty comments about why she likes "vagina" over "pussy" in a way that creates some sexual tension between Marla and Sharon.)
Sbarron85 – Wow that is incredibly sad. Weird because you are the biggest pussy I know (RJ - This sentence didn't make a lot of sense to me.)
MaloMarz6969– The power of the internet, chica
Sbarron85 – Okay I will leave you to it then
MaloMarz6969 – Sharon, Wait! B4 you go I want to show you something
Sbarron85 – Marla, Please no creepy tranny pics. I have to work in the morning and I need some sleep.
MaloMarz 6969 – Relax it’s not that, check this out, you can’t tell me this is not hot.

Hope this helps.

RedJohnny

 

[Kitkat103]

The problem is that I am a very formal person when I im or type so I forget that others are not. Then I thought that since these women were supposed to be two adults that no one would notice if they did not utilize IM speak.

Your criticism was probably the most helpful of them all. Thank you RJ

Kitkat -

I'll second the comments on overly formal language. Their initial online conversation between Sharon and Marla had elements of "text speak" that gave it an element of realism, but also an element of the formality that others have noted that made it seem a little stilted. That's not to say that you can't have someone who speaks formally. The online comic Questionable Content has a character who didn't use contractions when she spoke, unless she was drunk. It was an affectation of her persona, and other characters commented on it. If you're going to do something that's non-standard like that, it's ok, you just need to accept it and make it part of the story.

Going through it in more detail:

MaloMarz6969 – Lol what a freaking idiot. So what are you up to?
Sbarron85 – Just waiting for Matt at his place. He is supposed to be working late. (RJ - The fact that she says "supposed to be working late" is inconsistent with her later assertion that she trusts him. For example, my wife is out of the house right now. If I believe she's at her yoga class, I would say, "She's at yoga." If I'm supicious of her activities, I would say, "She's supposed to be at yoga.")
MaloMarz6969 – Aha. I did not know that office drones had to work so late, honey its 11pm! (RJ - To me, a more realistic phrasing would be, "Aha. Didn't know that ...)
Sbarron85 – I know that, what are you implying?
MaloMarz6969- Well I think he is out too late to just be desk jockeying.
Sbarron85 – Well I trust Matt so kaput 4 your theory. What are you up to aside from prying into my personal life? (RJ - To me, this was a realistically written line. I liked the use of "kaput 4 your theory" - it adds realistic color to the dialog.)
MaloMarz6969 – I'm on this online forum and I'm just deliberately fucking with these people. There is one guy who is like bitching about these stories people submit. He keeps bitching and moaning about transsexuals so I am uploading these disturbing pictures of cross dressers and post op tranny women who look like men but have a vagina. (RJ - "disturbing" doesn't ring true, and nor does "vagina". Marla might say "gross" or "freaky" or use another adjective (or not, it isn't really necessary), but "disturbing" just isn't really a word that feels right - it's too formal. The same is true for the use of "vagina" but the point I made up above about doing something unusual still applies. You could use "vagina" and have Sharon mock her - i.e., "Vagina?!? Who says "vagina"?" and you could use that as an opportunity for some character exposition for Marla - i.e., give a couple of flirty comments about why she likes "vagina" over "pussy" in a way that creates some sexual tension between Marla and Sharon.)
Sbarron85 – Wow that is incredibly sad. Weird because you are the biggest pussy I know (RJ - This sentence didn't make a lot of sense to me.)
MaloMarz6969– The power of the internet, chica
Sbarron85 – Okay I will leave you to it then
MaloMarz6969 – Sharon, Wait! B4 you go I want to show you something
Sbarron85 – Marla, Please no creepy tranny pics. I have to work in the morning and I need some sleep.
MaloMarz 6969 – Relax it’s not that, check this out, you can’t tell me this is not hot.

Hope this helps.

RedJohnny

 

[PolyLvr]

For what it's worth; when I write thoughts or speech I say it in my mind and ask myself if it sounds the way someone would actually say it. I tend to write descriptions more formally.

You should've seen the first stories I wrote. Didn't even make it past me. It's an evolution.

Keep at it and have fun.

 

[mystical_myst]

Congrats!

Just dropped by to say congrats on your first story and hope there will be many more to follow in the not so distant future.
I really enjoyed it Kit! It was a different approach in writing from what I usually see on literotica. Very refreshing and long over due!
Well done and take a bow , gorgeous , with no panties preferably..lol
Your Delightful liam

Okay so I am still waiting approval on my story but here it is as for the illustration go here

All feedback would be appreciated. I am a little worried since i have yet to hear back from Lit.

In a nutshell woman masturbates while boyfriend is supposedly working late.


The Benefits of Plasma Television


MaloMarz6969 – Lol what a freaking idiot. So what are you up to?
Sbarron85 – Just waiting for Matt at his place. He is supposed to be working late.
MaloMarz6969 – Aha. I did not know that office drones had to work so late, honey its 11pm!
Sbarron85 – I know that, what are you implying?
MaloMarz6969- Well I think he is out too late to just be desk jockeying.
Sbarron85 – Well I trust Matt so kaput 4 your theory. What are you up to aside from prying into my personal life?
MaloMarz6969 – I'm on this online forum and I'm just deliberately fucking with these people. There is one guy who is like bitching about these stories people submit. He keeps bitching and moaning about transsexuals so I am uploading these disturbing pictures of cross dressers and post op tranny women who look like men but have a vagina.
Sbarron85 – Wow that is incredibly sad. Weird because you are the biggest pussy I know
MaloMarz6969– The power of the internet, chica
Sbarron85 – Okay I will leave you to it then
MaloMarz6969 – Sharon, Wait! B4 you go I want to show you something
Sbarron85 – Marla, Please no creepy tranny pics. I have to work in the morning and I need some sleep.
MaloMarz 6969 – Relax it’s not that, check this out, you can’t tell me this is not hot.

Sharon waited impatiently as Marla uploaded the photo to the chat window. She knew it would be an arousing picture but did not know how so. The thought of another post op tranny picture made Sharon recoil. She began to toss her red tresses with her hand as she watched the photo sharing applet load. Times like these she wished Matt would pay for broadband instead of having to siphon a wireless connection from the local pastry chain store.

Just then Marla’s file transfer was complete. Sharon opened the file using her local paint program. To her surprise she let out a moan. The image she saw in front of her was absolutely beautiful. The image depicted two Asian lesbians, naked and covered in body oil engaging in a sensual embrace. Although they were just embracing each other, the looks on their faces were of pure ecstasy and bliss.

The image aroused Sharon in many ways. She had longed to have sex with another woman
But she loved Matt dearly and did not want to end their relationship. But Sharon longed to engage in a lesbian tryst with her best friend Marla.

Marla was a voluptuous curvy Latina that Sharon had known since High School. Sharon found Marla to be so very sexy but she was always in her own world. Although she could be selfish at times, she was very endearing and reliable. Sharon once considered finding an NSA partner online, but who would be a better choice, some woman you found on a classified ad website or your busty best friend that you have known for years? Sharon was scared to ask Marla in fear that it would ruin their friendship. What if she does not feel the same way? It would be hard to associate with each other after such a proposition.


If you made it this far, thanks

Sharon continued to admire the image. The oiled bosom of both women and the looks of pleasure on their faces made Sharon tingle. She was so entranced by their loveliness she had to push the computer chair away from the desk. She stood up and walked to Matt’s bedroom where she left her purse. She grabbed her mp3 player and quickly returned to the computer. She plugged it in and then synchronized the image to her mp3 player. With quickness Sharon practically leapt to the living room. There she plugged the mp3 player into the plasma television. Matt purchased the television for the Super bowl with intentions of returning it. One of his friends spilled a beer on the television so the return policy was null and void. He was now stuck with 56 inch plasma that he watched only twice a week.

After the light touching of the click wheel Sharon was greeted with the large image of the two women. She left the image on repeat as she made her way to the couch. The women were so gorgeous. It stirred up feelings of yearning that Sharon had hid inside of her. Aching to be touched by Marla, to feel her breasts pressed against her back. Her lips on her neck as she kissed her ever so gently. Her hands making their way down her sides, cupping her petite breasts, squeezing her nipples as Sharon moaned.

As these thoughts raced through her head Sharon removed her clothes. She reclined back onto the couch and spread her legs, leaving her left leg to dangle on the couch arm. Sharon gently stroked her legs, pretending that it was Marla touching her milky white skin softly, each touch sending waves of electric energy up her spine. Marla would start nibbling on her ear as she slowly dragged her fingertips up Sharon’s leg to her thigh. Then Marla would trace little circles on her small thighs as she made her way into her moist area, rubbing her engorged clit until she came in waves.

Sharon moaned deeply as she dragged her fingertips along her inner thigh, thinking of all the dirty things Marla could do to her. The more she thought about Marla, the wetter she became and could not take the teasing anymore. She gently rubbed her lips and spread her legs wider until her clit was visible enough for her to see in her seating position. Her pussy was red from anticipation and glistening with cum from just thinking about her buxom best friend. Sharon dipped her right fingers in her sweet little honey pot and rubbed the juices over her swollen clit. It felt so good and refreshing she stuck her fingers in deeply, trying to reach her sweet spot.

With success Sharon groaned passionately as she felt her fingers touching that bean like spot. She stopped squeezing her small breasts with her left hand and furiously rubbed her clit as she stimulated her g-spot. Images of Marla fucking her with a strap on, licking her clit rapidly flashed through Sharon’s head. Making her clit swell, her tight hole pulse. She wished she had bought one of her toys over; it would have been so hot to have something up her bum as she feverishly pumped her fingers in and out of her pussy.

Sharon stopped feeding her pussy her fingers and pulled them out to see the reward. They were glistening and covered in that savory juice. She rubbed those delicious juices over her nipples, loving the feeling that minor massage was giving her, wishing that she was feeding this delicious nectar with Marla. Sharon tasted it, so fucking good; too bad it has to go to waste. Sharon returned to rubbing her clit with that moist hand and then slowly guided two of her fingers back into her pussy with her thumb against her clit.

“Oh my gosh, this feels so fucking good!” Sharon shouted. Her throbbing love canal was tightening around her fingers; her chest was getting very red with passion. Her breathing became more labored as wave after wave of orgasmic pleasure tried to release itself from her repressed body. Sharon furiously rubbed her clit with four fingers; her labia had become juicy and too slippery for two fingers. Sharon let out a loud yelp as she felt her muscles tighten and contract, the couch becoming soaked underneath her.

Drenched in sweat Sharon moved her leg from the couch arm and laid down. She was completely spent. While enjoying her afterglow Sharon heard a thud. Matt stood in the doorway with bags of groceries; he dropped one of them at the sight of Sharon, nude and sweaty on his couch.

Sharon abruptly tried to put her clothes on but Matt walked across the living room to her. He grabbed her hand as she was trying to button up her skirt. Sharon looked at Matt quizzically.
“Babe, how long have you been standing in the doorway?” Sharon asked.
“Long enough.” Matt replied. He grabbed her hand and guided it to the bulging hard-on that was poking through his slacks; Sharon hesitated, and then smiled…..


If you made it this far thanks for reading!

 

[Kitkat103]

Okay my story was approved and so far has a decent rating. you are welcomed to view it here:

Thank you for all of your help.