Need Help. Lesbians Advice Please.

[SexyLatina19]

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[Night_Jasmine]

The only thing I can say is SAFE experimentation. It could be you haven't found the right man yet. Of course, I had similiar issues and didn't realize that I wasn't asexual but lesbian.

If you experiment, for the love of all things sacred, read up on safe sex between women and only do this with someone you trust.

 

[SexyLatina19]

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[lesbiaphrodite]

Thanks that makes a lot of sense. I do find myself sexually attracted to women but i'm sure what to do about it. It's just something that has been outside of my radar that it's left me a bit lost. I know i like sex, the thing is that i just cant feel that physical or emotional intimacy with a man. It's really confusing.

Intimacy is hard no matter what your sexual preference may be, but arousal is based on pure instinct and desire. If you are attracted to a man and are straight, then those instincts will be stronger than anything else. If, however, you do not feel that way with men, yet you do feel it with women, your instincts are telling you what you truly want. The only way to find out is to try it with someone loving and good and be safe.

 

[SexyLatina19]

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[Esperanza_Hidalgo]

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[SexyLatina19]

*****

 

[Esperanza_Hidalgo]

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[scotsmitch2001]

It seems you know the answer. It is just a matter of finding the "right" person to see if what it is you feel is right.
Dont rush into it. It will happen , dont use your families views and values as a stumbling block.
Be brave

 

[Stella_Omega]

Hi sweetheart,

If you are in FLA, there are a couple of support groups... i think. i sort of remember.

Here's one in Sarasota, anyways; http://www.alsoyouth.org/

And maybe you can find something this way ;
http://www.google.com/search?q=GLBT+support+florida


Listen to Esperanza, she's good people I grew up in East L.A. and my very first girlfriend was Latina-- and she's still a good friend to me... So I have seen a little bit of what Latin families can put their children through that don't follow tradition.

Here is another possibility. you might be asexual. There are more "aces" out there than most people know about. These people have little or no desire to have sex, But! that does not mean they don't want love, or companionship, or cuddling. Aces can have long loving relationships.

And what is interesting, is that someone can be a het ace. or a gay ace. Like.. the sex they don't want to have? They want to not have it with a man. or with a woman. And yes, there are bi-asexuals.

I do not know if this seem like you. But if it turns out that sex with women isn't real exciting to you, don't beat yourself up about it, okay?

Yes, you can be lonely and want love but not desire sex.

and yes-- you can be asexual and also enjoy orgasms.

 

[angelkitty7888]

Here is another possibility. you might be asexual. There are more "aces" out there than most people know about. These people have little or no desire to have sex, But! that does not mean they don't want love, or companionship, or cuddling. Aces can have long loving relationships.

And what is interesting, is that someone can be a het ace. or a gay ace. Like.. the sex they don't want to have? They want to not have it with a man. or with a woman. And yes, there are bi-asexuals.

I do not know if this seem like you. But if it turns out that sex with women isn't real exciting to you, don't beat yourself up about it, okay?

Yes, you can be lonely and want love but not desire sex.

and yes-- you can be asexual and also enjoy orgasms.

That sadly enough sounds like my Girlie *sigh*

Don't worry whatever you are! there will always be people to help and support you in your choices if you just look

 

[bigbike4]

Thanks alot for that. You are definitely right, as soon as i realized that no matter how hard i faked it with him it wouldnt work so i did the best thing for the both of us and i broke up with him. I'm really confused as to what to do about it. It's like i live in the smallest town in the world (or at least it seems like that) and i have no one to really talk to.

I am NOT Latino, but can appreciate your feelings. I am also quite a bit older than you. When I grew up (in a small town in PA), I too had no one to talk to about my feelings. I liked men and always hung out with them, they made great pals-but I was never attracted to them sexually. I ALWAYS had sexual fantasies about women, but never explored them until later in life. For most of my life I was confused, lonely and troubled with "Why" what my girlfriends told me they felt about being with guys I did not feel.

I figured I could either date every available man in the world till I might find 4 or 5 that would be compatable with me, or I could start dating women. And I also was "the good girl of the family". Decent grades, college deans list etc-never an ounce of trouble did my family have with me. Raised with traditional Christian values and went to church when the doors were open.

Well I stumbled upon a real honest to goodness Lesbian at work. She and I began a 12 year relationship, that was the true begining of my life for me. I miss her now that we have split up, but I still think fondly of her.

Point to this message, YOU have to decide what you want out of life. IF you don't, a lot of people will end up getting hurt when things fall apart, not the least of which will be you.

 

[Esperanza_Hidalgo]

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[SexyLatina19]

*****

 

[Esperanza_Hidalgo]

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