Repititions in stories... what do you think?

[OnlyByMoonlight]

I was just wondering how y'all as readers feel when you read a story and read one of those odd instances where a word is repeated. I try not to do it, but I'm just wondering if it bothers people.

Like:

She had had a man do that to her before

He handed her her book

I hate that that kid bites people

 

[driphoney]

In dialogue I think that that D) would be very realistic and bring believability.

 

[YoursSINSerely]

Nothing wrong with being right.

 

[sr71plt]

All of these instances are grammatically correct--but also are something to be avoided, as possible.

Other forms of repetition (e.g., "in and out, in and out, in and . . ." or "She's so fine fine fine") are literary/image techniques and are fine if done in moderation.

 

[OnlyByMoonlight]

I was referring to having them in the text and not dialogue. I think in dialogue they would be okay since thats how a lot of people talk.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

I was just wondering how y'all as readers feel when you read a story and read one of those odd instances where a word is repeated. I try not to do it, but I'm just wondering if it bothers people.

Like:

She had had a man do that to her before

He handed her her book

I hate that that kid bites people

Although grammatically correct, it grates a bit. Part of writing is to seduce the reader, surely.

How's about;

She remembered when a man had done that to her before/ A man had done that to her before/ Again, the man did to her what she had suffered before from another.

He handed her book to her/He picked up her book and handed it to her/ He profferred her book.

That kid bites people and I hate it/ I hate that the kid bites people.

I just have a feeling that the style of words you use paints the picture and avoiding correct but cluncky sentences helps weave the spell.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

I have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentenceI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that messWhat really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that mess and then repeats over and over and over againI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentenceI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that messWhat really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that mess and then repeats over and over and over again...

 

[YoursSINSerely]

I have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentenceI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that messWhat really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that mess and then repeats over and over and over againI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentenceI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that messWhat really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that mess and then repeats over and over and over again...

Well, that was a real quick read, Thee. Thanks for not wasting my time.

 

[_Lynn_]

I'm with sr on avoiding that sort of repetition even though they are grammatically correct. They stop the flow of a sentence and distract me from a story. I find them annoying and grating, as elfin mentioned.

 

[Lisa Summers]

I have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentenceI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that messWhat really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that mess and then repeats over and over and over againI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentenceI have become quite adept at skipping the repeated word or two. What really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that messWhat really annoys me is when the story stops in the middle somehwere and then starts again from the beginning again, sometimes in mid sentence, and then continues a little further and begins again, sometimes in mid sentence, only to begin again somewhere in the middle of that mess and then repeats over and over and over again...

http://knowyourmeme.com/i/681/original/what-you-did-there-i-see-it.thumbnail.jpg

 

[CMatthews]

I was just wondering how y'all as readers feel when you read a story and read one of those odd instances where a word is repeated. I try not to do it, but I'm just wondering if it bothers people.
Like:
She had had a man do that to her before
He handed her her book
I hate that that kid bites people

Your thread is nonsense, but I know exactly what you are describing.

Instead of saying "Cock" all the time, use "Pecker", "Member", "Penis", "It",
"That", etc, etc...

Bad writing: "I love to play with my son's cock while he is sleeping. I love to
watch his cock start to grow in my hand"

In this case "Love" and "Cock" were said twice in two sentences.

Better writing: "I love to play my son's cock while he is sleeping. I watch
it grow in my hand, then pretty soon I can't get my fingers around it.
Oh my God, it is big and hard! I can't resist the temptation to lean forward
and put my lips around the head of it."

Another mistake, here: I have two many "I" words in the paragraph.

It is really hard to tell a story without using a lot of "I" words. It is a
challenge that every author faces.

I hope I could be of some help.

Carolyn

 

[OzoneRed]

In the story in which OzoneRed had had "had had", "had had" had had his editor's approval.

Top that!