in praise of the South

[cloudy]

I was thinking this morning on my way home from taking the smallest savage to school, and I'm so thankful I live in the South, and come from a Southern family. Like all places, it has it's downside, but there are so many reasons to love it here:

1. Lynyrd Skynrd - my youngest is nine, and he already loves them. I've seen them more than two or three times (before the crash and after), and their music never gets old. Who can hear I Know a Little or Call Me the Breeze and not feel like getting up and dancing?

2. Wild eyed southern boys - nothing like 'em.

3. There are at least fifty different southern accents (no, not just one, as yankees seem to think), and all but the most ignorant are musical to listen to, not to mention sexy as hell when whispered in your ear.

4. Gumbo, jambalaya and all the cajun and creole delights from Louisiana

5. We like gravy - for breakfast on biscuits, especially. There are at least four stores between here and youngest's school that have homemade biscuits and sausage, bacon, whatever you want. BIG biscuits.

6. Banana pudding. If you haven't ever had it, you are so damn deprived. Find a southern woman immediately to make it for you.

7. Charlie Daniels, and the south's gonna do it again. Never doubt it.

8. Snow is a novelty, is fun, and is gone within a day.

9. We love, love, love football, everyone knows the rules, and your girlfriend/wife will be yelling, "Offsides! Offsides!" at the ref before you will.

9a. Speaking of football...the SEC is the BEST conference in the nation, can I get an amen?

10. No bland, boring food. Ever.

12. We eat dressing, not stuffing, and it's never, ever, ever made with white bread (yuck).

13. Fried chicken - and no, KFC is not real fried chicken.

14. Our kids say "yes, ma'am" without thinking about it.

15. We can spot a fake Southern accent within three syllables...and it hurts.

16. Look at the women that win Miss USA every year. Nine out of ten of them are from the South. 'nuff said.

************​

Okay, fellow Southerners....I know I've missed some, so add yours.

 

[euterpe410]

Will agree with most (go gravy, cornbread dressing, and fried chicken!), but not the SEC, sorry I'm a disgruntled Florida State fan (and yes, I'll admit it). I cheered furiously for Alabama over Florida (duh!), and will root for them to beat Texas (living in Oklahoma the last twenty years, can I do anything else?!?!), but this is only because I have no other options. I'll cheerfully agree to the other fifteen things on the list, but my dislike for SEC football knows no limits.

We have ESPN GameDay in our house every fall--for me. You're right, I'm screaming at the television before they throw the flags. Hubby thinks I'm nuts He was born and raised in a state that breathes football like air, and he barely follows the game. Go figure...

When I was growing up in Florida, temps below freezing were such a novelty that when they occurred most schools had to be closed. I only owned a winter coat because we went to visit relatives in the Appalachians every year for Christmas. Snow was fun because I only saw it two weeks out of every year.

 

[CrimsonMaiden]

It has been incredibly cold this past week. If this is a harbinger of the winter to come, we'll actually get snow that doesn't melt in a day.

 

[cloudy]

Will agree with most (go gravy, cornbread dressing, and fried chicken!), but not the SEC, sorry I'm a disgruntled Florida State fan (and yes, I'll admit it). I cheered furiously for Alabama over Florida (duh!), and will root for them to beat Texas (living in Oklahoma the last twenty years, can I do anything else?!?!), but this is only because I have no other options. I'll cheerfully agree to the other fifteen things on the list, but my dislike for SEC football knows no limits.

We have ESPN GameDay in our house every fall--for me. You're right, I'm screaming at the television before they throw the flags. Hubby thinks I'm nuts He was born and raised in a state that breathes football like air, and he barely follows the game. Go figure...

When I was growing up in Florida, temps below freezing were such a novelty that when they occurred most schools had to be closed. I only owned a winter coat because we went to visit relatives in the Appalachians every year for Christmas. Snow was fun because I only saw it two weeks out of every year.

I went to UT (go big orange!), but my dad went to Auburn, so I'm an Auburn fan now that I live in Alabama, but I was yelling like crazy when Alabama kicked Florida's ass.

I still don't own a winter coat. A heavy hoodie is about all I need.

It has been incredibly cold this past week. If this is a harbinger of the winter to come, we'll actually get snow that doesn't melt in a day.

You a bit further north than me, but the mornings have been cold as hell here. I can deal with it as long as it warms up later on.

 

[buxxxom]

In my school career, we had snow days, but the Hurricane days were far more common. Snow you drive over, fallen trees you drive through.

People say "I Love You" in many different ways. One of the most common is with a bowl of potato salad.

There is music outside: crickets, bullfrogs, the neighbor's banjo you can hear through the woods, church bells tolling.

Lightning bugs....some call them fireflies.

June bugs....made into helicopters.

Tomatoes and corn, both raw and warm from the garden.

Toughening your feet in the summertime on the hot asphalt.

Church league softball, watching middle aged men become heroes again.

Brain freeze from homemade ice cream.

We'll pickle almost anything: eggs, sausages, pig's feet, watermelon rind, okra, squash, cabbage, beets.

Ceiling fans and front porches.

 

[cloudy]

IJune bugs....made into helicopters.

This is fast turning into a lost art. I've shown my kids, but the neighbor kids were just amazed. They'd never done it.

Church league softball, watching middle aged men become heroes again.

I played Church league up until just a few years ago - first base. We take our softball serious as any major league baseball game, and the players are tough. I hated to quit, but my knees aren't what they used to be.

watermelon rind

My stepdad makes the best damn watermelon pickles in the world.

front porches.

When I went to Canada the first time, I couldn't figure out why all the houses just looked so damn wrong to me, and then it hit me: they don't have front porches, or at least, not anything we'd call a porch.

 

[cloudy]

I thought of another one:

Southern women seem all soft, delicate and feminine, and we certainly can be, but we can deliver an insult that is so well disguised it'll take someone an hour to realize they've been insulted, and we can use a shotgun/rifle as well as most men.

 

[buxxxom]

When I went to Canada the first time, I couldn't figure out why all the houses just looked so damn wrong to me, and then it hit me: they don't have front porches, or at least, not anything we'd call a porch.

Where do old dogs and couches go?

 

[cloudy]

Where do old dogs and couches go?

I haven't figured that one out yet. Maybe we should ask Lance.

 

[buxxxom]

I thought of another one:

Southern women seem all soft, delicate and feminine, and we certainly can be, but we can deliver an insult that is so well disguised it'll take someone an hour to realize they've been insulted, and we can use a shotgun/rifle as well as most men.

Not for me, at least on the rifle. Cross dominant eyes. Right handed, left eye dominant. All rifle sights are for people with same side dominance. Makes me hell with a softball bat, though.

Good Lord, .38 Special. Instant transport back to high school.

 

[mikey2much]

american by birth, southren by the grace of God

Long ago my father told me that southern people spend the first part of their lives trying to get away and the rest of their lives trying to get back.

That has worked out to be true with me. Too bad I couldn’t get those northern paychecks to come to my mailbox.

However even being poor does not kill the thrill of being ‘home’

 

[buxxxom]

Another one.

Trick or treating in a costume so hot you took it off after the first two houses. Plus, most of the houses here are so spread apart, you had to drive to them. You got as much homemade stuff as you did candy.

County fairs.

Spending the day in the hayloft with a book.

All of these were on my grandmother's table: venison, rabbit, squirrel, possum, turtle, frog legs, dove, catfish.

Big hair will never go out of style.

Flip flops year round.

Any southerner knows that where you see the word "walnut," you can substitute pecan, and it will be better.

 

[cloudy]

cow tipping

frog gigging.

 

[driphoney]

When I went to Canada the first time, I couldn't figure out why all the houses just looked so damn wrong to me, and then it hit me: they don't have front porches, or at least, not anything we'd call a porch.

Not too many of those left in the South with all the new construction. Oh, and for what it's worth, I grew up in the North (southern part of the state though and we all sound like Southerners!) and everyone in my little dying town had a porch--and don't faint--used it!

I miss that.

 

[euterpe410]

cow tipping

frog gigging.

In my parents' day, it was outhouse tipping

 

[cloudy]

Not too many of those left in the South with all the new construction. Oh, and for what it's worth, I grew up in the North (southern part of the state though and we all sound like Southerners!) and everyone in my little dying town had a porch--and don't faint--used it!

I miss that.

I dunno....come to Alabama. I doubt you'd see one in ten houses without a porch, and many of them are wrap-around on at least two sides. But then, this is old south, heart of dixie, and all that.

 

[_Lynn_]

Another one.

Trick or treating in a costume so hot you took it off after the first two houses. Plus, most of the houses here are so spread apart, you had to drive to them. You got as much homemade stuff as you did candy.

County fairs.

Spending the day in the hayloft with a book.

I love county fairs.

(Oops, I'm in the north. Stepping back out.)

 

[cloudy]

I love county fairs.

(Oops, I'm in the north. Stepping back out.)

We don't mind visitors - southern hospitality, and all.

 

[_Lynn_]

We don't mind visitors - southern hospitality, and all.

I lived in FL and TN for ten years. Does that help?

And several of the things mentioned here I grew up with too.

Fireflies
June bugs
Fresh from the garden veggies
Church softball
Manners
Saying 'I love you' was with casseroles or baked goods though

 

[driphoney]

I lived in FL and TN for ten years. Does that help?

And several of the things mentioned here I grew up with too.

Fireflies
June bugs
Fresh from the garden veggies
Church softball
Manners
Saying 'I love you' was with casseroles or baked goods though

 

[Edward Teach]

Pinto Beans
And especially with cornbread and especially with cracklin corn bread.

Pintos with onions on them

Pintos with tomatoes on them

Pintos with chow-chow on them

 

[euterpe410]

Pinto Beans
And especially with cornbread and especially with cracklin corn bread.

Pintos with onions on them

Pintos with tomatoes on them

Pintos with chow-chow on them

Oh, corn bread and pinto beans. Or corn bread torn up in a glass with cold milk poured over it. Or corn bread hot out of the oven with lots of butter.

This is an evil thread...now I want to go make corn bread. Lots of corn bread. And eat it.

 

[Edward Teach]

Azaleas and Dogwoods
Crepe Myrtle
Magnolia trees
Honeysuckle vines

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

There are 4 distinct Southern personnas.

The dregs of the barrel is the Cracker/Nigger personna. They reside in trailers and
'public housing, their kids fill special education classes, and virtually all of them have done some time in state prison. Their means of subsistence is usually unlawful. They attend Church of God or Jehovah's Witness. Ride the city bus.

The middle group is the peasants. They work for someone, own at least one pickup, love NASCAR, look like Dolly Parton, and their chief goal in life is to be a member of the Sheriff's Special Auxillary and ride in parades on horseback. Baptists and Methodists. Drive Fords.

The Patricians own a business or have a profession. The wife is usually a teacher. All of them clean-up well. Dad is a Mason, Mom belongs to the League of Women Voters. The kids attend State U. They attend Church of Christ or Presbyterian. Many own trailer parks and used car lots. Drive Lincolns.

The Aristocracy are 10th generation Southern, Episcopalian, hold high political office, college trustee, bank board of director, kids attend Vanderbilt or Duke, drive Mercedes.

 

[Misty_Morning]

Pecan pie...with a scoop of vanilla ice cream

chicken n dumplins

the Natchez pilgrimage

gigging flounder