Butthole, Asshole, Poopchute, and (help me God) Hershey Highway

[CopperSkink]

Nothing complicated here. You're sitting there, enjoying some Whoppers to go with the third chapter of what's turned out to be a pretty interesting series, and then it hits you: The Butt-Hole.

Is it just me, or does that hyphen fuck up your sense of sexual equalibrium? And not just when referring to our favorite guilty pleasure, but it crops up during cock-head, tit-fuck, bi-sexual, and Barbara Streissend.

I don't use Microsoft Word. While Track Changes would be nice to let my authors know exactly what changes I've made and where, not having those stupid little green underlines telling me I'm not using gerund phrases properly when I know perfectly well I am doesn't really irk me. Still, I'm left to use my imagination when it comes to the correct grammar and spelling for certain situations.

For the moment, that means certain compound nouns. It's neither a butt nor a hole, yet "butthole" doesn't register on Spellcheck. What do? At what point do we tell our authors to quiet their little green underlines in favor of a more visually pleasing page of porn? Or am I the only one who can't stand to see our precious dirty words under the scrutiny of the English language? After all, the point of them being dirty is that we're not supposed to be using them in the first place, so since when did they ever have to be spelled or punctuated properly?

I know, it's supposed to come down to what the author likes to see on the page. But for those that are still open to the idea that sometimes the wrong way is right, what do you say in capacity as editor? "It's not in the rulebook, but it looks better if you right it such-and-wise,"?

Comments would be appreciated. Virtual paper airplanes will be virually set on fire.

 

[JJ34]

Hi CS,

If the readability of the sentence is not affected, why should it become necessary to search for an answer? If it isn’t broke, don’t fix it. This is a case where what looks good and sounds good, works. Make the rules up as you go but leave the author some decision space also.

JJ34

 

[snoopercharmbrights]

... not having those stupid little green underlines telling me ...

So switch off the "check grammar as I type".

... "butthole" doesn't register on Spellcheck. What do? ...

Click "add to dictionary" or "ignore all", according to taste.

... I know, it's supposed to come down to what the author likes to see on the page. But for those that are still open to the idea that sometimes the wrong way is right, what do you say in capacity as editor? "It's not in the rulebook, but it looks better if you right write it such-and-wise,"? ...

Precisely.

Bear in mind that fashions change, and so do languages. Try any nineteenth century book and compare it with a modern one and you'll see what I mean. If that doesn't convince you, try Chaucer.