Cocooning

[sweetnpetite]

Lately, I've been experiencing many symptoms of depression, and it's possible that it IS depression, but I don't think that it is. I've been sleeping a lot, extremely tired. I haven't been writing, I haven't been reading. I haven't been- much of anything.

The way that I describe this is that I am cocooning. I am trying to trust that it is just a down time for me, that it's ok to just be inactive and reclusive and that eventually I will emerge and it will be all for the better.

I just read that although a catepillar turns into a butterfly, and they have the same DNA (as you have the same DNA throughout your lifecycle), there is a time when the creature is in it's cocoon that it's DNA just breaks down into a sort of formless soup, and it just basically has to hang out and trust that it won't be that way forever. Because a butterfly is not just a catepillar with wings on it.

Now I don't know if the science is all completly accurate, or even if I remembered it correctly, but it's really more of the principal that I am going for here. That it's ok just to be a puddle of goo for a while. It doesn't mean that I'll always be a puddle of goo. In fact, it's just that instable (or is it unstable?) but neccessary phase that has to take place before you can fully transition into the next phase.

Then again, maybe I just need to have my medication adjusted. Does anyone else feel what I am saying?

 

[epiphany65]

I've felt much like this for the past week or so. I call it either cocooning or hibernating. I go through it around this time of year every year. The fact that it's -16C today (and has been close to this for a week) doesn't help. I don't feel like going out and haven't seen any sun break through the clouds in a week. I'm used to this and expected it weeks ago so it doesn't alarm me. I've been killing time online and listening to audio books -- anything that requires little effort or input. I know once it gets warmer and sunny I'll snap out of it. Howlin' Wolf said that white folks don't really get the blues -- we get the blahs. And that's what I have now, thanks to Mother Nature. Psychologists call it SAD: Seasonally Adjusted Depression.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

SAD is basically shortage of Vitamin D. Get a sunlamp, put on your bikini (or not, as preferred) and work up to an hour a day and it should completely go away. Or you can drink more milk . . . a lot more milk.

 

[vella_ms]

SAD is basically shortage of Vitamin D. Get a sunlamp, put on your bikini (or not, as preferred) and work up to an hour a day and it should completely go away. Or you can drink more milk . . . a lot more milk.

that is exactly what i was going to say. if you've never had/experienced SAD before, chances are you can make the symptoms lessen with sun light

massive hugs sweetie

 

[Lady_Guenivere]

Lately, I've been experiencing many symptoms of depression, and it's possible that it IS depression, but I don't think that it is. I've been sleeping a lot, extremely tired. I haven't been writing, I haven't been reading. I haven't been- much of anything.

The way that I describe this is that I am cocooning. I am trying to trust that it is just a down time for me, that it's ok to just be inactive and reclusive and that eventually I will emerge and it will be all for the better.

I just read that although a catepillar turns into a butterfly, and they have the same DNA (as you have the same DNA throughout your lifecycle), there is a time when the creature is in it's cocoon that it's DNA just breaks down into a sort of formless soup, and it just basically has to hang out and trust that it won't be that way forever. Because a butterfly is not just a catepillar with wings on it.

Now I don't know if the science is all completly accurate, or even if I remembered it correctly, but it's really more of the principal that I am going for here. That it's ok just to be a puddle of goo for a while. It doesn't mean that I'll always be a puddle of goo. In fact, it's just that instable (or is it unstable?) but neccessary phase that has to take place before you can fully transition into the next phase.

Then again, maybe I just need to have my medication adjusted. Does anyone else feel what I am saying?

I feel it...I have been a catepillar...a cocoon...and a butterfly. It is challenging to trust in the process and it is not until you go through it do you completely understand that each stage is necessary for the evolution to happen. You can't appreciate being a butterfly otherwise.

xo

 

[john-the-author]

Agreed with all of these things. I had a writer years ago who spent extra money and bought full-spectrum fluorescent bulbs for her office as an anti-SAD method. It made a big difference and they really were easier to see by, as well. You can get full-spectrum fluorescents and incandescents. I always liked Chromalux bulbs, but there are others.

SAD is like claustrophobia: you never know you've got it until it smacks you right in the face.

 

[sweetnpetite]

I feel it...I have been a catepillar...a cocoon...and a butterfly. It is challenging to trust in the process and it is not until you go through it do you completely understand that each stage is necessary for the evolution to happen. You can't appreciate being a butterfly otherwise.

xo

Yay!!! I'm so glad that somebody completly got what I was saying!

So many people had advice for just trying to "fix" it, but isn't it ok to just have some downtime?

I cocconed. Then I got contemplative. Then I emerged. Maybe I'm still emerging, but I definatly think that things are moving the way that they are meant to. Some good things are coming together in some really suprising ways. I'm ready to be a butterfly. Don't expect great things right away- my wings are still wet.

 

[Xelebes]

I remember the days where I would dream of turning into a cocoon - where I would wrap myself in a blanket and see if it was undoable from the outside and think of dying in that position. There are several times I have gone into complete shutdown and, in a way I suppose, catatonic. I came out when I came out of it, when I had fallen asleep and allowed myself to wake up and all would seem fine, until I would go back into the cocoon and hope yet again to die.

It was a tough cycle and I suppose it was more a response to fear moreso than anxiety. Or both. I only got out of the funk when I had the fortune of moving to another house, across the river and into a new school. Much of my problems were from school and the extreme bullying at the time. Once I moved, the desire was less so.

 

[sadangel]

I so wish I could just cocoon right now. I do. I get what you are asking. I need it.