Bondage Bloopers?

[Safe_Bet]

Man handcuffs his wife to the bed, loses key
updated 1:04 p.m. PT, Thurs., Dec. 11, 2008

DEARBORN, Mich. - If you love something, set it free. And if you can't, call the police. The Detroit Free Press reported police responded to a call Thursday morning by a Dearborn man who handcuffed his wife to their bed but misplaced the key.

Police used a universal key to free the woman.

Sgt. Ray Patrick said the situation was "more of an intimate relationship than an unlawful imprisonment."

*Snerk*

 

[fieryjen]

I have had nightmares about that sort of thing.

That's why I like rope much, much better.

 

[Stella_Omega]

It's good to keep a universal key around-- just in case your friends need help!

Jessamine knew what (Gloria) was searching for even before it was brandished before her. “No, wait!” she shrieked. “We lost the key for those, remember?”

“We did?” Gloria perused the police cuffs. “Oh, yeah, we did… That’s a shame, I’ll take ‘em into the shop tomorrow.” She pulled the other pair off her Bates jacket, where they had been hanging from the right-hand epaulet. “Where’s the keys to these?”

“In your watch pocket,” Jess whispered.

 

[TxRad]

I had a girlfriend that stayed at my house while I went to work on a long job. To make a long story short, she found a set of double cuffs with a connecting chain I had in the closet. When a couple of her girlfriends came over she was showing them off. One thing led to another and I got a call about ten thirty at night.

She had put them off as a joke and then got a big surprise. We had use handcuffs before but another set. She knew where that key was but it didn't fit the set of doubles.

The phone call on speaker phone went something like this:

GF: Uh, Tex, i have a bit of a problem. (Giggling in the background)

Tex: Oh yeah, and what would that be?

GF: Uh, the handcuff key doesn't fit the double cuff set I found in the closet.

Tex: Yeah, that's right. They are made by different companies.

GF: Uh, where is the key for the double set?

Tex: On my keyring.

GF: where is your keyring?

Tex: In my pocket. (The giggling is now full laughter)

GF" (Loud groan) When will you be home?

Tex: About two weeks, why?"

GF: I can't wear these for two weeks.

Tex: You shouldn't have been snooping in my closet.

GF: I know but....

Tex: The key is in my top dresser drawer.

GF: Oh, Thank God

Girlfriends, girlfriends are rolling on the floor.

 

[DesertPirate]

I am now rollng on the floor

Thanks Tx.

 

[fieryjen]

I had a girlfriend that stayed at my house while I went to work on a long job. To make a long story short, she found a set of double cuffs with a connecting chain I had in the closet. When a couple of her girlfriends came over she was showing them off. One thing led to another and I got a call about ten thirty at night.

She had put them off as a joke and then got a big surprise. We had use handcuffs before but another set. She knew where that key was but it didn't fit the set of doubles.

The phone call on speaker phone went something like this:

GF: Uh, Tex, i have a bit of a problem. (Giggling in the background)

Tex: Oh yeah, and what would that be?

GF: Uh, the handcuff key doesn't fit the double cuff set I found in the closet.

Tex: Yeah, that's right. They are made by different companies.

GF: Uh, where is the key for the double set?

Tex: On my keyring.

GF: where is your keyring?

Tex: In my pocket. (The giggling is now full laughter)

GF" (Loud groan) When will you be home?

Tex: About two weeks, why?"

GF: I can't wear these for two weeks.

Tex: You shouldn't have been snooping in my closet.

GF: I know but....

Tex: The key is in my top dresser drawer.

GF: Oh, Thank God

Girlfriends, girlfriends are rolling on the floor.

Bwahahahaha!


You're evil! In a delightful way though.

 

[rgraham666]

I broke the key to a pair of handcuffs once. While they were on the young lady I was playing with.

Luckily the working end remained in the cuffs and a little work with a pair of needle nosed pliers got them released. Whew!

 

[Guest]

I had a girlfriend that stayed at my house while I went to work on a long job. To make a long story short, she found a set of double cuffs with a connecting chain I had in the closet. When a couple of her girlfriends came over she was showing them off. One thing led to another and I got a call about ten thirty at night.

She had put them off as a joke and then got a big surprise. We had use handcuffs before but another set. She knew where that key was but it didn't fit the set of doubles.

The phone call on speaker phone went something like this:

GF: Uh, Tex, i have a bit of a problem. (Giggling in the background)

Tex: Oh yeah, and what would that be?

GF: Uh, the handcuff key doesn't fit the double cuff set I found in the closet.

Tex: Yeah, that's right. They are made by different companies.

GF: Uh, where is the key for the double set?

Tex: On my keyring.

GF: where is your keyring?

Tex: In my pocket. (The giggling is now full laughter)

GF" (Loud groan) When will you be home?

Tex: About two weeks, why?"

GF: I can't wear these for two weeks.

Tex: You shouldn't have been snooping in my closet.

GF: I know but....

Tex: The key is in my top dresser drawer.

GF: Oh, Thank God

Girlfriends, girlfriends are rolling on the floor.

You said you would never tell!

*pout*

 

[TxRad]

You said you would never tell!

*pout*

Hush. I would have never let you out of those cuffs and you know it. Well, not until we were both worn out anyway.

 

[Guest]

Hush. I would have never let you out of those cuffs and you know it. Well, not until we were both worn out anyway.

That's better.

 

[slyc_willie]

*Snerk*

The story reminds me of the "naked hoovering" episode of Coupling.

Essentially, one of the characters, after handcuffing his girlfriend to the bed, inadvertently swallows the handcuff key while "hoovering" her body.

Hmm . . . maybe I should shop for some velvet-lined cuffs on Ebay?