Delta of a Kiss

[intherushes]

Delta of A Kiss

I wander the undergrowth,
a hushed cry hidden,
it beckons.
Layers unfold before me:
not lost, not lost...
Tangled vine and root writhe,
innocent their wishing...
wild to touch
air and green and delicacy;
bent into the tender ache…
union in minute sways...
My toes find humus.
Eyes drink from the burnished stem.
Teeth sink soft into flesh,
the heart listens for response.
I linger beneath delicate fronds
who’ve found their home in quiet joy
and daily drown in each succulent blush.
Languid is the intake of breath…
each exhale a whisper received...
I lie down in the verdant growth
and gladly drown to know resurrection
in the delta of your soft, soft lips…

 

[intherushes]

The taste of her
fragrance

lingered
upon your smile:
Molten silver and rosepetal.
The feel of her
at the exact moment
inhibitions

dropped.

Eyes felt the hush
of silk
slide from a vesuvian shoulder,
the escaped moan
a signal
for pleasures surrender.

Your very soul surged to meet.

Yet, you

held

back

the animal urge inside
your nature-
to allow the grace of her
to blossom
slowly...

let ecstacy pour
into the familiar house
of your work-worn hands.

 

[intherushes]

so....I've lurked a bit and figured out how to properly submit work here. Realized this wasn't the proper venue. still, if you wish please, leave a comment

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

Delta of A Kiss

I wander the undergrowth,
a hushed cry beckons.
Layers unfold before me:
not lost, not lost.
Tangled root and vine writhe,
innocent their intent.
Wild to touch air
and green with delicacy
bent into the tender arch, (I've fiddles with the 1st 8 lines)
union in minute sways. (not sure what this means)
My toes find humus. (humous? I'm english - humus is a Lebonese chickpea dip)
Eyes drink from the burnished stem. ( stream? Do you drink from a stem?)
Teeth sink soft into flesh,
the heart listens for response.
I linger beneath delicate fronds
who’ve found their home in quiet joy
and daily drown in each succulent blush. (I like these 5 lines)
Languid is the intake of breath…
each exhale a whisper received...
I lie down in the verdant growth
and gladly drown to know resurrection
in the delta of your soft, soft lips…

I think you've got some nice images in here but some cliches too. You use nature well to describe her delta but "undergrowth" just sounds wrong. The 5th line is also a bit too organic to be erotic - if that's your intention. Welldone - keep writing.

 

[intherushes]

Hello sweet lady... Tristesse, I'd like to thank you very much for taking the time to offer your thoughts/suggestions on Delta of a Kiss. It's much appreciated. I"ll ponder your thoughts carefully.
To respond for now, I'd state that I'm a admirer of the ecstatic word.... such musings hold the same draw for me as well in my own work. (for the most part anyway)

So phrasing is employed in a very intentional way...almost like establishing a breathing cadence, a tandem heartbeat... allegory, metaphor... play out in a rich, and sometimes, not readily available manner. yet, are intended.

Maybe it's a bit too claustrophobic... I'll need to ponder it.

As far as humus. It's an earthy, rich deep, dark brown/black soil. or component of ... Hummus however, is a chickpea dip I have a wonderful recipe for...served with baked and seasoned pita triangles... delicious! Grins sometimes words are mischievious little buggers, I know...

union in minute sways.............................. think about it...another image: a grove of trees seemingly still at the edge of twilight. look closely....... see how the still wind moves them. see how new twilight kisses them....how they move together..... as lovers might, caught up in the "dance"

and my hearts eyes do drink from stems.....huggsss to you T... I love that you've questioned me...

Please don't be a stranger, T. Drop in anytime.

Love and cherries to you...

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

Hello sweet lady... Tristesse, I'd like to thank you very much for taking the time to offer your thoughts/suggestions on Delta of a Kiss. It's much appreciated. I"ll ponder your thoughts carefully.
To respond for now, I'd state that I'm a admirer of the ecstatic word.... such musings hold the same draw for me as well in my own work. (for the most part anyway)

So phrasing is employed in a very intentional way...almost like establishing a breathing cadence, a tandem heartbeat... allegory, metaphor... play out in a rich, and sometimes, not readily available manner. yet, are intended.

Maybe it's a bit too claustrophobic... I'll need to ponder it.

As far as humus. It's an earthy, rich deep, dark brown/black soil. or component of ... Hummus however, is a chickpea dip I have a wonderful recipe for...served with baked and seasoned pita triangles... delicious! Grins sometimes words are mischievious little buggers, I know...

union in minute sways.............................. think about it...another image: a grove of trees seemingly still at the edge of twilight. look closely....... see how the still wind moves them. see how new twilight kisses them....how they move together..... as lovers might, caught up in the "dance"

and my hearts eyes do drink from stems.....huggsss to you T... I love that you've questioned me...

Please don't be a stranger, T. Drop in anytime.

Love and cherries to you...

Chastened, I bow but insist that humous is "earthy, rich deep, dark brown/black soil". Wars have been fought over such but this is not the day to contemplate that.

Peace - oh, and cherries.

 

[intherushes]

agreed... various spellings for both defintions, it seems... loving the cherries