Did you ever deal with bullies that didn't leave you alone?

[Le Jacquelope]

The guy put his hands on you, you broke his nose, now according to the talking heads, he's supposed to run away and cry and not bother you again, right?

Hell no. That sure as hell wasn't my experience that he ran off forever.

Usually he brought friends or a weapon the second time around.

My parents were vigilant in not letting me leave the house with a knife, much less a gun, and ever so rarely, I'd encounter a bully who came at me with a knife. But once is enough that you'll never forget it.

When I left high school, it wasn't long before it escalated to guns.

So who else had a problem with repeat offenders, or even escalators?

What did you do if they came back at you with a weapon and the law didn't care?

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

JACQUELOPE you werent raised by a woman who was mostly Indian. You did not fuck with her twice.

If you made a lewd remark to her she'd usually point a gun at your nose and demand an apology. Or she hired private detectives to follow you around until you put your paws in some boy's pants.

I have a newspaper clipping of her encounter with a judge. The judge said something she didnt like and she politely asked him what the fine was for contempt of court. He said $100. She asked if five 20s were okay. He said yes. She gave him the money then said, LET ME KNOW WHEN MY TIME IS UP! He got $100 worth of her opinions about him.

I learned a lot from her about how to help bullies get the right attitude.

 

[xssve]

The guy put his hands on you, you broke his nose, now according to the talking heads, he's supposed to run away and cry and not bother you again, right?

Hell no. That sure as hell wasn't my experience that he ran off forever.

Usually he brought friends or a weapon the second time around.

My parents were vigilant in not letting me leave the house with a knife, much less a gun, and ever so rarely, I'd encounter a bully who came at me with a knife. But once is enough that you'll never forget it.

When I left high school, it wasn't long before it escalated to guns.

So who else had a problem with repeat offenders, or even escalators?

What did you do if they came back at you with a weapon and the law didn't care?

That was the lone bullies that were common when I was a child, and even in groups, none of them wanted to risk being beat up in front of their friends - it works a bit differently in gangs, especially when they have guns, and if you beat one of them he has to either get back at you or become a target himself. If he tires to kill you, you can kill him, or if there's more than one I always assume the worst, i.e., it's life threatening, but of course that means after you do it you'll have to go and kill the whole troop, because they'll have to come after you.

There were a lot of kids in prison back in the eighties because they shot bullies, and you had to be an idiot to pick on a shorty because chances were good he was packing, even at Eight years old - I always thought of that as a good thing.

I've somehow managed to avoid the whole thing, mainly by avoiding places gangsta's hang out, but you may not have that option. If in a pinch, I try to talk my way out of it, praise him as a "fierce warrior", etc., i.e., give him his respect, or whatever he interprets that as, make him feel good, because the first option, outlined above, would be highly inconvenient to me; I have kids, etc. It's just easier, and I can do that without feeling in any way diminished as a man or a human being. It's a social thing, and I don't like to fight; you tear up your clothes and get blood all over them, and those things are expensive.

Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a big stick.

I had a neighbor across the street when I was growing up who I had to defend from bullies occasionally, who later ended up getting into a firefight on his front porch when he lived in Phoenix with gang members who wouldn't leave his kid alone. I think he moved back here after that.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

no one bothers me because i'll kill you if you do. people sense it and go away.

 

[R. Richard]

The guy put his hands on you, you broke his nose, now according to the talking heads, he's supposed to run away and cry and not bother you again, right?

Hell no. That sure as hell wasn't my experience that he ran off forever.

Usually he brought friends or a weapon the second time around.

My parents were vigilant in not letting me leave the house with a knife, much less a gun, and ever so rarely, I'd encounter a bully who came at me with a knife. But once is enough that you'll never forget it.

When I left high school, it wasn't long before it escalated to guns.

So who else had a problem with repeat offenders, or even escalators?

What did you do if they came back at you with a weapon and the law didn't care?

Violence, as you have apparently learned, solves nothing. If you break a bully's nose, you remove the base support that allows him to think that he's a big man. What other option does he have, other than to get a tool(s) and come back?

If, on the other hand, you terminate a bully, he never comes back. [Apologies to those who believe in voodoo, but that's my experience.] The scumbags have problems understanding the rather simple situation.

I have a question for you. What is a repeat offender? TIA.

 

[cloudy]

JACQUELOPE you werent raised by a woman who was mostly Indian. You did not fuck with her twice.

Amen to this.

My SO's mother is a wonderful woman: she's the rock of the family, strong as an oak, always to be counted on, always has food on the stove just in case someone from the large extended family comes by. Think the stereotypical Indian matron - that's her.

She happens to love me, thank goodness, because she scares the shit outta me.

 

[Boota]

I would have made a great bully - bigger than everyone else my age, I loved to fight, and all that. But I was the anti-bully. I have never been able to stand seeing someone else being victimized. I ALWAYS have and ALWAYS will step in, regardless of risks to my own safety. I took a very severe beating in sixth grade for defending some elementary school kids from a group of rampaging eighth graders. There were twelve of them going after these kids, so I drew their attention and got my ass kicked all the way home. (But don't worry, I got my payback )

The best advice I can give in handling bullies is to make an example of them. Don't just hit back and hope they get the idea. It often works exactly as predicted and they leave you alone forever, but sometimes it doesn't. That's why I advocate a severe and prolonged beating with many excesses. Broken bones are a prerequisite. The bully DOES NOT WALK AWAY. He will be carried away. You have to show that you are willing to go farther than the bully. He has to fear your psychological makeup, even if in reality you are completely sane and the "craziness" is calculated.

As far as if he's coming back with guns or friends, there is nothing you can do about that. You either fight back or live in fear, always being a victim. Do what you can to legally protect yourself in case you are forced to kill one of them. Police reports are your friend. Report the people so that there is a record of their actions against you. A self-defense case depends on your inability to extricate yourself from the situation and showing that they are continually coming after you goes a long way to an acquittal.

 

[ottohauser1977]

In the Communist youth organizations, I dealt with hazing often. I got over it, but I shouldn't have experienced it. But that was life under a Stalinist regime, so they didn't care.

My father's attitude? He thought that it would toughen me up.

 

[xssve]

Well if they just jump you and don't give you chance to talk your way out of it, all you can do is fight back as hard as you can and resign yourself to getting your ass kicked.

That's the gang culture, it how you join a gang in fact, "jumping in", in which the prospect has not a chance in hell of winning. The whole idea is not about who wins or loses, but that you'll fight even when the odds are against you - it sorts out the hierarchy in the gang, because once you're in, they don't want infighting.

If you lose, they don't lose face and have no reason to keep after you, while they will (theoretically) respect the fact that you fought back - if you don't fight back, they may kick you to death.

I've heard things to that effect Otto, I've seen vids of Spetznatz beating the shit out of each other - ships company used to do the same thing when I was in the Navy, although I think they did it more out of boredom. A similar culture in English boarding schools is often alluded to.

 

[ottohauser1977]

Well if they just jump you and don't give you chance to talk your way out of it, all you can do is fight back as hard as you can and resign yourself to getting your ass kicked.

That's the gang culture, it how you join a gang in fact, "jumping in", in which the prospect has not a chance in hell of winning. The whole idea is not about who wins or loses, but that you'll fight even when the odds are against you - it sorts out the hierarchy in the gang, because once you're in, they don't want infighting.

If you lose, they don't lose face and have no reason to keep after you, while they will (theoretically) respect the fact that you fought back - if you don't fight back, they may kick you to death.

I've heard things to that effect Otto, I've seen vids of Spetznatz beating the shit out of each other - ships company used to do the same thing when I was in the Navy, although I think they did it more out of boredom. A similar culture in English boarding schools is often alluded to.

Yes, and the Nazis did the same thing. Brutality is sadly part of the Prussian tradition. I think that we could have been as tough and brave without getting our asses kicked by other boys all of the time. But I could be wrong, though I doubt it.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I always advised my son to catch bullies alone...and hurt them.

A character in one of my stories dresses as a ghost (KKK?) Halloween, then provokes a bully to chase him through the dark. The bully ran into an icepick.

 

[xssve]

Yes, and the Nazis did the same thing. Brutality is sadly part of the Prussian tradition. I think that we could have been as tough and brave without getting our asses kicked by other boys all of the time. But I could be wrong, though I doubt it.

Sex is a better outlet for aggression. The Greeks used to wrestle naked, it's very good exercise - but I don't know if that would ever catch on in a co-ed environment.

 

[ottohauser1977]

Sex is a better outlet for aggression. The Greeks used to wrestle naked, it's very good exercise - but I don't know if that would ever catch on in a co-ed environment.

Oh, but co-ed naked wrestling would be the best. Just think where it could lead. Of course, that's what the prudes would fear.

 

[xssve]

A sound mind in a sound body...

 

[Le Jacquelope]

The best advice I can give in handling bullies is to make an example of them. Don't just hit back and hope they get the idea. It often works exactly as predicted and they leave you alone forever, but sometimes it doesn't. That's why I advocate a severe and prolonged beating with many excesses. Broken bones are a prerequisite. The bully DOES NOT WALK AWAY. He will be carried away. You have to show that you are willing to go farther than the bully. He has to fear your psychological makeup, even if in reality you are completely sane and the "craziness" is calculated.

Now THIS is my kinda person right here.

 

[Le Jacquelope]

Violence, as you have apparently learned, solves nothing. If you break a bully's nose, you remove the base support that allows him to think that he's a big man. What other option does he have, other than to get a tool(s) and come back?

If, on the other hand, you terminate a bully, he never comes back. [Apologies to those who believe in voodoo, but that's my experience.] The scumbags have problems understanding the rather simple situation.

I have a question for you. What is a repeat offender? TIA.

A repeat offender is someone who comes back at you for more - usually with a weapon.