Lisa Denton
Can nipples explode?
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2004
- Posts
- 7,758
Yes, we was plunged back into the dark ages. Man, or woman, against the elements. Without everything we take for granted.
I dunno exactly how much of the US was affected, but I couldn't see no lights in any direction from my house, so I suppose it was widespread.
There I was, trying to boot into safe mode because my computer was fucked, when all the power went out. I looked across the street and couldn't see no lights. I was thinking maybe I shouldn't have pressed F2 during boot or whatever I had just pressed, because I had knocked out power in a wide area, but it probably wa sjust a coinkidink.
Anyways, I calmly and quickly evaluated the situation, I was fucked. Out of the four flashlights which I keep for just such situations, only two had batteries that wasn't dead, but they were dying. I lit two candles and got out the oil lamps.
Who knew lamp oil evaporates? Fuck. I got out the big refilling lamp oil container thingie. Trying to refill oil lamps by candlelight sucks, then of couse, tragedy struck. One of the lamps wicks only had a tiny bit left and it flickered out.
I looked at my doggie Scooter. It was dog eat dog. The chips wa sdown and only the strongest would survive. I wondered if he would fit in the big turkey roaster thing.
I had two candles and two oil lamps but still couldn't see shit. I used the dying flashlight to find the power company number and called them. They played elevator music. the FUCKING EMERGENCY POWER NUMBER FUCKIN PLAYED ELEVATOR MUSIC!!!!!!!! While you are dying without power they torture you with elevator music.
Finally a girl who speaks perfect english, with an acccent so think I couldn't understand hardly a word came on, I told her the situation, and the power came on.
She had prolly been sitting there with a big light beeping saying "punch this button" but she had been sleeeping until I called.
Anyways, me and Scooter survived, I dunno anbout everbody else.

I dunno exactly how much of the US was affected, but I couldn't see no lights in any direction from my house, so I suppose it was widespread.
There I was, trying to boot into safe mode because my computer was fucked, when all the power went out. I looked across the street and couldn't see no lights. I was thinking maybe I shouldn't have pressed F2 during boot or whatever I had just pressed, because I had knocked out power in a wide area, but it probably wa sjust a coinkidink.
Anyways, I calmly and quickly evaluated the situation, I was fucked. Out of the four flashlights which I keep for just such situations, only two had batteries that wasn't dead, but they were dying. I lit two candles and got out the oil lamps.
Who knew lamp oil evaporates? Fuck. I got out the big refilling lamp oil container thingie. Trying to refill oil lamps by candlelight sucks, then of couse, tragedy struck. One of the lamps wicks only had a tiny bit left and it flickered out.
I looked at my doggie Scooter. It was dog eat dog. The chips wa sdown and only the strongest would survive. I wondered if he would fit in the big turkey roaster thing.
I had two candles and two oil lamps but still couldn't see shit. I used the dying flashlight to find the power company number and called them. They played elevator music. the FUCKING EMERGENCY POWER NUMBER FUCKIN PLAYED ELEVATOR MUSIC!!!!!!!! While you are dying without power they torture you with elevator music.
Finally a girl who speaks perfect english, with an acccent so think I couldn't understand hardly a word came on, I told her the situation, and the power came on.
She had prolly been sitting there with a big light beeping saying "punch this button" but she had been sleeeping until I called.
Anyways, me and Scooter survived, I dunno anbout everbody else.
