How to live life?

CheekyBoots

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208
Hey all!

So I'm a 22-yr-old college student, and I'm having a horrible time staying focused on the important stuff. I'm a little shy and kinda overwhelmed by the outside world, and I've been becoming more and more reclusive.

It's not that I'm lazy, but I feel stifled by all the things I should do or want to do that I just stay inside. Any suggestions on how to inspire myself into action? How to get out there and enjoy my life in a constructive way? I'm so tired of feeling petrified; scared and immobilized.

Thank you, thank you! :D
 
Hey all!

So I'm a 22-yr-old college student, and I'm having a horrible time staying focused on the important stuff. I'm a little shy and kinda overwhelmed by the outside world, and I've been becoming more and more reclusive.

It's not that I'm lazy, but I feel stifled by all the things I should do or want to do that I just stay inside. Any suggestions on how to inspire myself into action? How to get out there and enjoy my life in a constructive way? I'm so tired of feeling petrified; scared and immobilized.

Thank you, thank you! :D

Unfortunately, the best way to combat this situation is to just get out and do something.

When I was in college, I could not think of any way to go out and make friends, but I love to ride my bike. So I found the University Cycling Club. Started attending a few meetings, did a few rides... started making friends, and voi'la... I was out doing stuff with people. Two years later I was the president of the club, as well as Captain of the Cycling team.

My suggestion to you. Think of something you enjoy doing, whether it be attending shows at the planetarium, or taking a class at the Rec. Center, or perhaps joining a cycling or a photography club. If you can do something you enjoy with other people, it will be all that much more enjoyable.

Good luck to you.
 
Unfortunately, the best way to combat this situation is to just get out and do something.

When I was in college, I could not think of any way to go out and make friends, but I love to ride my bike. So I found the University Cycling Club. Started attending a few meetings, did a few rides... started making friends, and voi'la... I was out doing stuff with people. Two years later I was the president of the club, as well as Captain of the Cycling team.

My suggestion to you. Think of something you enjoy doing, whether it be attending shows at the planetarium, or taking a class at the Rec. Center, or perhaps joining a cycling or a photography club. If you can do something you enjoy with other people, it will be all that much more enjoyable.

Good luck to you.

Hey, thanks a bunch for the advice! Yeah, I really need to look into clubs and stuff. It's hard to get around the sorority junk (which I... strongly dislike, to put it nicely) but I think I'll just redouble my searching efforts.

It's extra awkward because I transferred to a university from a community college, so most people have well-established connections by now, and I'm just starting out. But yes, I'll definitely look into clubs & stuff. Thanks! :)
 
Hey, thanks a bunch for the advice! Yeah, I really need to look into clubs and stuff. It's hard to get around the sorority junk (which I... strongly dislike, to put it nicely) but I think I'll just redouble my searching efforts.

It's extra awkward because I transferred to a university from a community college, so most people have well-established connections by now, and I'm just starting out. But yes, I'll definitely look into clubs & stuff. Thanks! :)

Hey.. I moved to a new city, hours away from home, to a University where some of my friends from high school were at, and had been for over a year... so they all had connections, friends, places to go.. things to do. I ended up in a basement dorm room and knew essentially 3 people out of a student body of 35,000. And to boot... I didn't know my way around town.

Have bike, will travel... so I did. Got to the point where I knew my way around town better than my friends who had been there longer.

If you're part of a sorority, that's cool. Not a bad thing. Just try to stay away from some of the parties and most of the booze. (Sorry... didn't mean to imitate your dad) But a sorority can be of assistance to helping you find clubs and outside activities. If they don't want to help, and try to keep you within the house (or whatever you've got)... let them know politely that you need something to do outside the sorority.
 
Hey.. I moved to a new city, hours away from home, to a University where some of my friends from high school were at, and had been for over a year... so they all had connections, friends, places to go.. things to do. I ended up in a basement dorm room and knew essentially 3 people out of a student body of 35,000. And to boot... I didn't know my way around town.

Have bike, will travel... so I did. Got to the point where I knew my way around town better than my friends who had been there longer.

If you're part of a sorority, that's cool. Not a bad thing. Just try to stay away from some of the parties and most of the booze. (Sorry... didn't mean to imitate your dad) But a sorority can be of assistance to helping you find clubs and outside activities. If they don't want to help, and try to keep you within the house (or whatever you've got)... let them know politely that you need something to do outside the sorority.

Oh, oh, what I meant was, I'm stayin' the hell away from sororities, no matter what... One of my friend is a *bracing self before uttering pure ridiculousness* 'sister'... and she has to do some of the stupidest stuff! It's absurd!

But I like your biking idea; it's a fairly bike-friendly town around here, so even if I'm not part of a biking club, I could get more familiar with the city. Find all the exciting, friend-making spots. :p Haha! Thanks for the ideas!
 
Oh, oh, what I meant was, I'm stayin' the hell away from sororities, no matter what... One of my friend is a *bracing self before uttering pure ridiculousness* 'sister'... and she has to do some of the stupidest stuff! It's absurd!

But I like your biking idea; it's a fairly bike-friendly town around here, so even if I'm not part of a biking club, I could get more familiar with the city. Find all the exciting, friend-making spots. :p Haha! Thanks for the ideas!

Glad to hear that you haven't been corrupted by the Greek system. I stayed away from Frat's like the plague.

Another nice thing about biking around town is you learn all the little shortcuts.. and... you won't have to worry about gas... and you'll be getting your excersise... and you generally don't have to worry about what's going on around you so long as you are really moving on your bike.
 
Another nice thing about biking around town is you learn all the little shortcuts.. and... you won't have to worry about gas... and you'll be getting your excersise... and you generally don't have to worry about what's going on around you so long as you are really moving on your bike.

It's like the biggest win-win-win-win-win situation since the dawn of time! :D Alright, this girl's gonna give the biking thing a shot. Thanks!
 
It's like the biggest win-win-win-win-win situation since the dawn of time! :D Alright, this girl's gonna give the biking thing a shot. Thanks!

Have fun... and be safe about it. Helmet is a good idea (helmets saved my life a couple times), Eye protection is a MUST! Find a local bike shop and get a nice set of wrap-around sunglasses (polarized) and a set of wrap around clear glasses. They will prevent you from getting rocks kicked up by passing cars, or bugs, or anything else in your eyes. The clear glasses are obviously for nighttime riding.

Lights... fantastic idea. At bare minimum a tail light is a must. Preferrably one that flashes.

And of course... a good lock. U-Locks are the best. :D If you need any more cycling advice... let me know. :) I used to do this all the time... and still do.
 
Hey all!

So I'm a 22-yr-old college student, and I'm having a horrible time staying focused on the important stuff. I'm a little shy and kinda overwhelmed by the outside world, and I've been becoming more and more reclusive.

It's extra awkward because I transferred to a university from a community college, so most people have well-established connections by now, and I'm just starting out. But yes, I'll definitely look into clubs & stuff. Thanks! :)

As Gizzmotick suggested, go out and check out the clubs. You might also want to see if there's any volunteer groups that you can join. Most have a cause dear to their heart, and the majority volunteer groups are always looking for people to help out. It's a win-win-win - you get to help out the community, meet people, and do something for whatever cause.

Most university department has a meet and greet at the beginning of each year, if not each term. This is great opportunity to meet the faculty (always a good thing), the grad students if there are any (even better) and other students.

Most people are friendly and welcoming. If you say hi and ask them how they are doing or another class related question (and listen to the answer), half the battle's done. Oh, and contribute intelligently to the class discussion. Oftentimes, those discussions go past the lecture hour and far into the night. I've met some of my closest friends that way.

Good luck. University life can be lonely only if you let it to be.:kiss:
 
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Wake up, do what you gotta do, go to sleep. Rinse, repeat.

Ha, yeah, the problem arises in figuring out what 'what I gotta do' is [weird sentence ^^]

But hey, now you're one post closer to getting that avatar! Go you! :nana:
 
Ha, yeah, the problem arises in figuring out what 'what I gotta do' is [weird sentence ^^]

But hey, now you're one post closer to getting that avatar! Go you! :nana:

A guy has to have goals. Sometimes figuring out what you gotta do takes all day, go to sleep.
 
Juggling and folk dancing clubs always seemed fairly inclusive and friendly.
 
Drama clubs can be very welcoming and very accepting... you don't have to act either. You can stage manage, help out with costumes, props, set building, etc. And drammie geeks throw the best parties! Trust me on that one :D
 
Drama clubs can be very welcoming and very accepting... you don't have to act either. You can stage manage, help out with costumes, props, set building, etc. And drammie geeks throw the best parties! Trust me on that one :D

Now that's a fun idea! I thought about getting into the whole drama thing at my JC, but I was always afraid I'd get roped into acting somehow. That would be saaaaad for the audience, let me tell you... :rolleyes:

Thanks for the input; I'll definitely look into that! :D
 
Drama clubs can be very welcoming and very accepting... you don't have to act either. You can stage manage, help out with costumes, props, set building, etc. And drammie geeks throw the best parties! Trust me on that one :D

I was thinking this too. Yep, best parties!

At MIT, the lecture series committee(LSC) was fun, as was the student center committee. LSC did a film series, film stuff is fun.
Other younger friends currently at various universities tend to like student center stuff.
If you are into Sci fi/fantasy there is usually a club for that. I also like kite flying, esp fighting kites.
The international student association can be fun, you get to meet people from other countries. An advantage when dealing with other cultures is that people must spell things out, as there are no assumed signals or messages. I like that, I never know my own culture norms.
I am still friends with people from collage clubs.
 
I was thinking this too. Yep, best parties!

At MIT, the lecture series committee(LSC) was fun, as was the student center committee. LSC did a film series, film stuff is fun.
Other younger friends currently at various universities tend to like student center stuff.
If you are into Sci fi/fantasy there is usually a club for that. I also like kite flying, esp fighting kites.
The international student association can be fun, you get to meet people from other countries. An advantage when dealing with other cultures is that people must spell things out, as there are no assumed signals or messages. I like that, I never know my own culture norms.
I am still friends with people from collage clubs.

Fighting kites?! :eek: That's super hardcore! :cool:

Yeah, I went to an international students' potluck to get more involved in the international population. Turns out that I my school, 'international' means Chinese-only. No one else allowed. I'm whiteIrishPolishScottishGermanAmerican and I got some super hostile looks like I was just there for the food. Haha, I didn't go back. :rolleyes:
 
Fighting kites?! :eek: That's super hardcore! :cool:

Yeah, I went to an international students' potluck to get more involved in the international population. Turns out that I my school, 'international' means Chinese-only. No one else allowed. I'm whiteIrishPolishScottishGermanAmerican and I got some super hostile looks like I was just there for the food. Haha, I didn't go back. :rolleyes:

The trick with people like that is kill them with kindness. Smile, introduce yourself, ask them how they made their dish. Get them talking. Are you sure they were all Chinese, not just all Asian? Did you bring a dish too? Maybe they were scared?

Seriously, this is good practice for the future. Especially if you don't really care what the outcome is. Make it a game, try to turn them to your side, you never know what might happen. Remember white European based cultures are a minority in the world so its best to be able to deal successfully with everyone you can.
 
The trick with people like that is kill them with kindness. Smile, introduce yourself, ask them how they made their dish. Get them talking. Are you sure they were all Chinese, not just all Asian? Did you bring a dish too? Maybe they were scared?

Seriously, this is good practice for the future. Especially if you don't really care what the outcome is. Make it a game, try to turn them to your side, you never know what might happen. Remember white European based cultures are a minority in the world so its best to be able to deal successfully with everyone you can.

Haha, wow, I guess I sounded anti-Asian; totally didn't mean to! :rolleyes: In fact, I'm minoring in Japanese and the majority of my friends are Chinese or Korean, so it's not like I've never interacted with non-Europeans... But when I heard 'intercultural night' I assumed it was an event for cultural mingling of sorts; everyone learning from everyone else, ya know? But when I got there, it seemed a lot more like 'take a break from white Euro-Americans' night. I wasn't upset that there weren't any people "like me" there. I felt guilty like I was crashing a party. I was super nice and actually had a really good talk with a grandmotherly woman who liked my purse. Hehe!
 
Greek life actually isn't bad. I rather enjoyed my experience with it (and if there's anybody in the world who has no tolerance for bullshit, it's me). You meet a lot of interesting folks that way.
 
Now that's a fun idea! I thought about getting into the whole drama thing at my JC, but I was always afraid I'd get roped into acting somehow. That would be saaaaad for the audience, let me tell you... :rolleyes:

Thanks for the input; I'll definitely look into that! :D

Actually, a lot of people who join drama clubs want to act, so the background work tend to be neglected. Branch out, dabble in the various aspects (from lighting crew to costumes), and what you don't know will be happily taught, especially if you're enthusiastic and willing to learn. Most people find their 'calling' very quickly. And the extra help is ALWAYS appreciated. I remember this one girl who strolled in the Green Room and looked around, seeing about 6 weird, sleep deprived, drama students during a student festival. She muttered shyly that she wants to help, but doesn't want to act. Total silence, and then a cheer. One of the directors jumped up hugged and kissed her soundly on her lips. We asked her interests, introduced her to a few people, and she threw herself into any task that was offered. She quickly became valuable in set painting.

I was thinking this too. Yep, best parties!
Definitely. I have a feeling that we can exchange some stories :D
 
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