The SCOURIES reader – for both fans and serious scholars…

[cloudy]

That's it, Cloudy. Last night is the last time I'm allowing you to blow me. No, there's no use begging. It's too late. You're insulted me one too many times. I'm done giving you the privilage of my body.

Apparently, Cloudy, even your birthday doesn't make you happy.

You take me waaaaaaaay too literal. Do you really believe that I want them hit by a car? Do you really think that I would hit them with my car?

Do you have any idea the cost of insurance, not to mention how much it cost to buff out all that blood and all those scratches to my body work?

Besides, I'd visit them in the hospital. It's for their own good, after all, so that they can go outside and experience life and maybe even (gulp) write a...what do you call those things, oh yeah, a story.

I thought what I wrote was creatively funny now if you want to start up some shit over this Cloudy then I understand the meaning of your name. Only, I'd change it to Thunder Cloud.

Happy birthday, you big old bag of wind (cloudy, get it?). May you live another 75 years.

Hugs, humps, and kisses,

Freddie

Yep, just as I expected.

Ah, well, I had to try. I see promise in you. Too bad you've got it hidden under that chip on your shoulder that weighs ten tons.

I've not been anything but fair with you, but you overreact to the slightest hint of criticism.

I tried.

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

Go rain on someone

Cloudy, what's with all the rain clouds and thunder? Cheer up. It's your birthday, yet, again. By the way, how many more of these birthdays are you going to have. Maybe, you should save some for someone else, you know.

...not to mention, what the Hell are you doing here on your birthday?

Yes, Cloudy, I see that you are wearing a birthday hat and eating your cake, but it's kind of sad that you are spending your birthday with...cyber people.

Please, can you stop singing Happy Birthday to me for one second. God, you have a terrible voice.

Look, it's nice outside and there are people walking around without umbrellas. Let's have some real fun. Let's pee on their parade.

Go outside and rain on everyone. That'd be fun.

Last one outside is a wind bag.

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

Let's all be nice to Scouries

Chip on my shoulder? If you don't see humor in the stuff that I write than you are the one with an airplane wing on your shoulder.

Listen, put down the plane, allow it to land, and let's talk.

Okay, you can blow me again. Happy now?

Listen, come closer. I don't want everyone to hear this. Don't worry, I used mouthwash today.

I have it from good source that Scouries is a Hollywood celebrity. Not to mention the fact that he is freakin' rich.

I've been trying to ingratiate myself with this guy so that he'll discover me. Trust me, once he starts working on production of his next movie, he won't be hanging around here much longer.

I think that if we were all really nice to him, maybe he'd take us all along with him. I'd love to write for a movie would't you?

I have a funny feeling that this guy is not Scouries but in fact is really Clooney, George Clooney. If not him, then he may be Brad Pitt. Definitely, he is either one or the other.

Now, don't be flapping your gums about this because I don't want anyone else to know who he really is. I want to go with him and I don't wany others trying to get on his good side. So, please don't tell anyone that we had this conversation. Okay?

 

[cloudy]

Cloudy, what's with all the rain clouds and thunder? Cheer up. It's your birthday, yet, again. By the way, how many more of these birthdays are you going to have. Maybe, you should save some for someone else, you know.

...not to mention, what the Hell are you doing here on your birthday?

Yes, Cloudy, I see that you are wearing a birthday hat and eating your cake, but it's kind of sad that you are spending your birthday with...cyber people.

Please, can you stop singing Happy Birthday to me for one second. God, you have a terrible voice.

Look, it's nice outside and there are people walking around without umbrellas. Let's have some real fun. Let's pee on their parade.

Go outside and rain on everyone. That'd be fun.

Last one outside is a wind bag.

I see you already have so many friends that you can't possibly risk making another.

btw: not my birthday, darlin' - it's in July, so you'll have plenty of time to save up for my gift.

Although I think you'll be rather lonely, since you so loudly rebuff any offer of friendship, have a nice life. I won't reach out a hand to you again, don't worry.

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

July?

July? Don't tell me that you're a Leo the lion?

My birthday is July 26th.

Wait, that's what you call reaching out your hand by criticizing what I write and taking the meaning of it all wrong?

I can tell you now that there are people peeing themselves over the stuff that I write and for you to take it the opposite way tells me that either you have no sense of humor, are that dumb, or are just trying to stir up shit.

By reading much of what you write, I know you are not dumb but in fact are quite intelligent. Morevoer, I know you have a good sense of humor, too. I've read some of the funny put downs you've written that have flown over the heads of those who are less than you in intelligence and wit.

So, that leaves me to the conclusion that you are just trying to stir up some shit. Why? Are you trying to anger me so that I will embarrass myself with a tirade of ranting. This time, my white puffy friend, your ruse won't work. I refuse to fall for your trap.

The sun is out and I'm a happy man.

Here take my hand and lets go for a walk. Now, what I told you before about Scouries either being George Clooney or Brad Pitt is true. Have I ever lied to you before?

Okay, yeah, but when I said I won't cum in your mouth really wasn't a lie. It's only a lie if you believe it to be true. I always knew that I'd cum in your mouth so I wasn't lying when I did.

Anyway and by the way, I wrote an Earth Day story that, in honor of our new friendship, I'd like to dedicate to you.

It's just a short story, really, something that I whipped up last night after American Idol and before I retired for bed at 11pm. Yeah, I know, I couldn't believe that it took me more than an hour to write 20,000 words but it did. I was tired. Maybe, that was the reason it took me so long to write the story. An hour is way too much time to spend writing 20,000 words.

The story is about a Native American Indian, a Sioux Indian girl named Lisa. I'd be honored if you read it...all 8 chapters (lol).

 

[ZanyRaine]

So, let me see if I understand this:

You threaten people's lives, make insinuations about performing sexual acts with them and it's done for humor? BFW, this is not funny. It's degrading and it's insulting. It's threatening, and at the very least, rude. My dear man, do you bother read what you type out? People have gone to jail for less.

Something I do find humorous in one of your posts is insinuating that scouries could be a major Hollywood talent. Now that was funny.

 

[cloudy]

The story is about a Native American Indian, a Sioux Indian girl named Lisa. I'd be honored if you read it...all 8 chapters (lol).

I appreciate the thought, but I'm Choctaw, and we're very different from the Sioux.

But, thanks anyway.

 

[drksideofthemoon]

The story is about a Native American Indian, a Sioux Indian girl named Lisa. I'd be honored if you read it...all 8 chapters (lol).

Sioux is a bastardized French word. Here is a bit of information for you. I do this so you won't embarass yourself, or do dishonor to the descendents of Tatanka Iyotake.

LAKOTA – or Teton: Prairie Dwellers – with Seven Bands:

Oglala – They Scatter Their Own or Dust Scatters
Sicangu – or Brule: Burnt Thighs
Hunkpapa – End of the Circle
Miniconjous – Planters Beside the Stream
Sihasapa – or Blackfeet: NOTE – not the commonly known Blackfeet/Blackfoot Tribe
Itazipacola – or Sans Arcs: Without Bows; also known as Oohenupa/Two Boilings or Two Kettles”

THE DAKOTA OR SANTEE - with Four Bands:

Mdeakantonwon:
Wahpeton
Wahpekute
Sisseton

THE NAKOTA OR YANKTON with Three Bands:

Yankton
Upper Yankton
Lower Yankton

THE SIOUX NATION consisted of about 20,000 people in 7 different tribes throughout the Great Plains. Free nomads of the Plains, they took great advantage of available horses which were originally brought to the Americas by Cortez and the Spanish in 1519. The horse allowed them the mobility to pull their tepees as they traveled and were an invaluable aid in hunting buffalo, their main staple.

FAMILY-ORIENTED WARRIORS:
While the Sioux were known to be great warriors, the family was considered the key unit of Sioux life. Children, called "Wakanisha" (Waka meaning sacredness) were of primary importance to the Sioux family and were therefore the center of attention.

While monogamy was the norm, Indian men had the ability to take on more than one wife. The roles of men and women were clearly defined. While the men were expected to provide for and defend the family by hunting and making war, the women were the matriarchs, ruling the family life and the domestic life of the tepee. When a man married a Sioux woman, it was expected that he would move into her home.

DEEPLY SPIRITUAL
The Sioux were a deeply spiritual people, who communed with the spirit world through music and dance. The Sun Dance was considered one of the most religious ceremonies of the Sioux. This twelve-day summer ritual of self-sacrifice was a testimony to individual courage and endurance in serving the Great Spirit. As a shared experience among men, the Sun Dance also instilled a sense of tribal unity. By dancing and enduring the pain of self-inflicted wounds, each participant reasserted his identity as an Indian warrior.

Going on the war path was part of a rite of passage for males. War was the underlying principle of the Sioux people, because through it men gained prestige, and their prestige was reflected in the family honor.

 

[drksideofthemoon]

So, let me see if I understand this:

You threaten people's lives, make insinuations about performing sexual acts with them and it's done for humor? BFW, this is not funny. It's degrading and it's insulting. It's threatening, and at the very least, rude. My dear man, do you bother read what you type out? People have gone to jail for less.

Something I do find humorous in one of your posts is insinuating that scouries could be a major Hollywood talent. Now that was funny.

My theory is that he is an unhappy person with very little control over his life. He is socially retarded, and is unable to deal with people. He probably throws tantrums over the smallest things, and most likely enjoys being in a rage, as it would give him a sense of empowerment that is lacking in his real life.

His threats, his insults etc. and then his attempts to play them off as being his sophisticated Boston sense of humor only underline his problems. And there is a fair possibility that he has bipolar disorder as well.

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

more shit from the crap crowd

Zany, now why are you trying to stir up shit when there is nothing in my post to stir?

Darksideofinsanity, thank you so much for the wealth your information on the Sioux nation. It is very helpful, not really, well, not at all, but thank you anyway.

Now, as far as the personal attacks, which is the only things that you post, especially about me, I won't dignify them with a response.

Really, anyone who pees in his saddle should not be calling someone else crazy.

For the record, I meant no harm in what I wrote. I stand by what I wrote. I meant it all as humor. Now, if you miscreants cannot take a joke and don't have a sense of humor, then that is your problem and not mine.

Please put me on your ignore list if my posting here bothers you so much.

Have a pissy day.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

A lot of the writers and forum members I enjoyed reading don't seem to hang around and laugh as much as they did.

Does anyone reckon this has anything to do with the rabid sewer rats that seem to be surfacing? A quick rant - when cross - followed by an apology, and great deal of respect for any newbie that posts a story is a prerequisite. Dripping poison, invective and being a boorish lout just pisses people off. Someone should start a list of offenders.

 

[sr71plt]

A lot of the writers and forum members I enjoyed reading don't seem to hang around and laugh as much as they did.

Does anyone reckon this has anything to do with the rabid sewer rats that seem to be surfacing? A quick rant - when cross - followed by an apology, and great deal of respect for any newbie that posts a story is a prerequisite. Dripping poison, invective and being a boorish lout just pisses people off. Someone should start a list of offenders.

Perhaps if some of those forum members hadn't enjoyed ganging up on and laughing at others so much . . . Although, yes, they certainly seemed to be having fun doing it.

But, then, that coming and going is the natural pattern/rhythm of Internet discussion boards.

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

*Special note...

There he is, Polo aka Scouries, the long legged 20 pound Rat Terrier.

He's going to be guarding this thread to make sure you 'nitwits' stay in line.

By the way, darksideoflunacy, he hates men on horses so I'd keep your distance if I were you. He can jump seven feet straight up from a stand still and he's been known to go for the testicles. He's already bitten the cable guy, the alarm guy, and a Pit Bull.

Yeah, he's a chip of the old block, although I've never been anyone in the testicles nor have I bitten a Pit Bull (lol).

*Special note for those who take offense, the above comments are meant to be humorous.

 

[Guest]

yesssssssss.............

[size=+3]WOW FREDDIE!!!![/SIZE]

in fact

[size=+3]BOW WOW WOW!!!![/SIZE]​

So that’s [size=+2]Marco P Scurious![/size] We love him. And if he ever gets too much for you, all you have to do is send him down to Miami Beach and we’ll take over.

And I just want to let you know that all of the employess of [size=+2]ScouriesWorld[/size] think that you now have the second best Avatar on LITEROTICA (after the bosses of course- especially since...).

Now I want one! I wonder what I should use for mine? How many posts do I need anyway?

Gabrielle L.
literotican…actress…threadmaster’s assistant…lover…and
ALT killer…and
V.P. ScouriesWorld seminars…and
assistant accountant reporting to mr. tex…and
deputy art director reporting to miss (I’m in charge of bananas)…and
official committee member
literotica royalty distribution committee…and
friend of GBers…and
director of scouriesworld translation services…and
vice-president marketing –Orgasming Centres Inc….and finally
secretary, 1000+ VOTE CLUB
collins avenue
miami beach, florida

 

[scouries]

good av freddie

SamuelX - General Board Thread

Ban SamuelX

I just read thru a thread on the GB and thought I’d bring it to the attention of my friends in AHland.

I’d of course been warned about the horrible people over there. It was only when I went on a visit to GB land a couple of weeks ago that I realized that the big bad bear wasn’t that big or bad.

I like the way the THREADMASTER of this thread and his idea were handled. There was an almost universal defense of an author’s freedom to write what he likes. An immediate rejection of censorship of someone we don’t particularly like.

I have to wonder what sort of replies would have been forthcoming if he had started his post in AHland.

Maybe I could start a thread called: “Can we get the writer known as ACE banned.”

Which brings to mind another funny story…

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

Alice doesn't live here anymore.

Uhm, maybe because I've written one too many stories and live my life too much in fiction, but what are you going on about Scouries?

GB? Is that Great Britian?

Who is Ace?

Suddenly, I feel like Alice in Wonderland.

 

[scouries]

Freddie:

GB? just click the link - Ban SamuelX - in the above post

Ace of course is the pilot

I'm scouries

and the funny story is...

…the funny story is that I inadvertently opened one of the ACE’s stories yesterday. As I cruised down the list my eyes caught “Rough Riding” and what I thought was “Barf” and my curious finger (it was wondering how barf was going to be woven into an erotic story) clicked the story open just before my mind registered it was a GAY MALE story by the PILOT.

As it turned out the word in the title wasn’t barf but BARUF, whatever that means. I flicked quickly to the end of the story and then, when I discovered it was only a half page long decided, what the hell, I’ll give him a try.

I gotta be frank here ACE and tell you up front I didn’t like the story. With me of course you started behind the eight ball given I’m not a big fan of gay stories and given our somewhat adversarial history – But no, I didn’t cast a vote nor make a comment.

Nor I do I have any specific complaints about your technical performance – the story seemed to have few grammatical errors or spelling mistakes, etc., etc..

My main problem with the story is it made no sense to me. I do understand that anonymous, casual gay male sexual encounters are perhaps more common than heterosexual ones, that risky behavior may even be the norm, but this?

The behavior of the “hero” was so baffling to me that the whole scenario fell apart. The set-up Starbucks scene made absolutely no sense. And then he had nothing better to do? And then the sexual encounter?

After having read it and thought about it a bit I have to admit I’m curious. I have a couple of questions for you (or other gay readers of the story):

1 – Does this encounter in any way at all actually reflect the gay male world of 2007? I’d describe myself as a relatively experienced heterosexual both in terms of quantity of women slept with and in terms of breadth of sexual experiences. But the type of encounter you describe here is completely foreign to me. Could the behavior you describe be typical?

2 – And second, would this type of Erotica have a large audience among the general homosexual population? Could this be described as a typical gay fantasy? I’ve always believed I could write a very popular story in just about any category on LIT but now have to question that given your story. The whole thing from start to finish seems mechanical and lacks any emotional content.

please advise,

jrs

 

[Darkniciad]

I’ve always believed I could write a very popular story in just about any category on LIT

**Dr. Pepper spew** http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i296/Darkniciad/lmao.gif

Oh, how I needed that laugh! I know he believes it, but that just makes it all the more insanely hilarious!

 

[sr71plt]

Uhm, maybe because I've written one too many stories and live my life too much in fiction, but what are you going on about Scouries?

GB? Is that Great Britian?

Who is Ace?

Suddenly, I feel like Alice in Wonderland.

But do you feel like Mutt and Jeff and/or Laurel and Hardy?

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

I'm not a fan of ban

Well, being that I'm from Boston I'm not a fan of banning anything or anybody. Everyone has a right to write whatever they want, so long as it's not about children and/or violence. Give me sex to violence any day.

As far as someone writing a gay story, be it good, bad or indifferent, I'm not judge of literature and I won't cast my opinion here as to my likes or dislikes. Being a heterosexual man, I don't normally read gay stories, but I have read a few good ones in literature.

I love this site because the moderation is relaxed and for the most part the people who write here are serious about writing stories. There are many intelligent and talented people who lurk here. I can't imagine turning anyone away.

As I like you, Scouries, I like Ace. We've jousted a bit, but there's nothing personal and I refrain from making personal attacks against anyone, that is, unless they attack me. Hey, I even like darksideofmoon. Any fan of Pink Floyd, the greates recording ever, can't be all bad.

I feel that you are digging yourself in a hole here, my friend. Best you continue with statistics, it's safer. Numbers don't lie, opinions do. You have enough enemies here without fishing to make more. You've opened a can of shit with this stuff. I rather read positive stuff than negative.

As an aside, you make me miss Miami. I haven't been there since they redid the Hotel Fountainbleau. I stayed on the 22nd floor, a suite that overlooked the beach and the ocean. It was beautiful. Now, Miami has changed many say for the better, yet, I don't know.

Lastly, we need writers such as SamuelX and sr71plt otherwise everyone will tend to write the same story that will belabor the point and quickly become boring. I welcome the different perspectives of other writers no matter their skill level or opinion. It's a learning experiece to read their interpretation of things.

 

[BOSTONFICTIONWRITER]

We need everyone

I'm sitting here with thoughts of all the people I have known in my life, thousands of people and everyone has a story to tell. This is where I get my stories and I have so many more stories to share. We are all so uniquely different.

My wife was obese and even her friends made fun of her behind her back. They were skinny bitches who couldn't hold a candle to the person that she was inside. Why don't we ban fat people from writing stories and posting here. Do you see what I mean, Scouries? Where do you draw the line?

Having worked as a Business Manager for a modeling agency on Newbury Street, I've known some beautiful people, people who you'd could not help but stare at them. Never do you see people like them walking the streets. Yet, most of them paled to my ugly friends in character and in substance.

I once had a job where I trained those who were addicted to drugs and those who abused alcohol. They were a pitiful bunch. Never have I seen people who were so lost, so out of touch, and so desperate. Everyone failed them, especially themselves. It was heart warming to see them smile when I gave them my time and a chance at earning a living and kicking their habit.

We should have a problem. When I think of some who never had a break and never had a chance, I'm a lucky man.

I like people. Definitely, even though some on this site may think otherwise of me, I'm a people person. I couldn't write stories about people if I didn't like people.

When I was a kid, I boxed in my uncle's gym. I was the only white kid there. I made a lot of friends. Only, once I left the gym, my sparring partners weren't my friends anymore. The ropes of the squared circle didn't allow prejudice, only talent to enter the mat. Yet, outside, they didn't want to know me.

I wanted to still be their friends and were hurt when they rejected me, but they were protecting me from harm. It was the 60's and Boston was a racist city, as it still is. Race is always an issue. I don't get it. What does it matter. It's just skin color. We are all the same.

I ban nobody from participating in life. We need everyone.

I had a terrible childhood, which is why I'm here. I was banned. Now, I'm accepted. I can chose who I hang around with. I can pick my friends. I'd be pissed if someone banned me from doing what I love to do, write.

I'd be hurt if no one read my stories. We all want the same things. Life is hard enough without making things worse.

I'm at a good place in my life right now. I found my passion. My passion is what carries me through my day. I'm miserable if I'm not writing.

Lighten up and let's work on making this site the best that we can make it. Once we do that, those who cannot conform will leave. We don't have to ban those people because they'll ban themselves. Right now, let's just accept.

 

[Darkniciad]

The one thing you forget, scouries, is that nobody wants your stories banned - or wants you banned for your stories. ( although your thinly veiled insinuations in one of them are pretty despicable )

I despise you for you, and the way you dump on anyone who outshines your pumped up, overblown image of self. I like to think of you catching a bad case of burning itch every time you attack someone just because their spotlight is outshining yours.

At the same time, you're a damn fine source of entertainment for me here in the forum. Your stories do nothing for me, but the web of lies, conflicting lies, delusions, conflicting delusions, conspiracy theories, non-sensical rants, disingenuous praise, and good old fashioned off-your-rocker whakko-looneyness is pretty entertaining. It's a little like watching the Keystone cops, with you playing all the parts, and the added opportunity of audience participation in throwing dancing banana peels on the stage to watch you slip and fall on your face on occasion.

So march on, sock puppet king. I'll keep laughing and throwing dancing banana peels

 

[sr71plt]

**Dr. Pepper spew** http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i296/Darkniciad/lmao.gif

Oh, how I needed that laugh! I know he believes it, but that just makes it all the more insanely hilarious!

When he has nice green Es here for straight, lesbian, and GM stories, we can sit and talk about how to construct a good erotic story.

Am I supposed to worry that he doesn't understand mine?

 

[Darkniciad]

When he has nice green Es here for straight, lesbian, and GM stories, we can sit and talk about how to construct a good erotic story.

Am I supposed to worry that he doesn't understand mine?

Only in his mind *laugh*

 

[drksideofthemoon]

When he has nice green Es here for straight, lesbian, and GM stories, we can sit and talk about how to construct a good erotic story.

Am I supposed to worry that he doesn't understand mine?

Or even W's...