Are Humans Meant to be Monogamous?

[xssve]

Well, check the thread on grudge fucks in Story Ideas (I'm fucked up so forgive the typos - struck out, alas, 7 more days of spring break without the kiddos) - the apocrophal story is the broken heart - man or woman, I don't think there's a probobly much of a statistical difference, who get's their heart broken, and has it in for all men/women, pretty much for the rest of their lives - i.e., they never get closure, so they take their shit out in every man/women they subseqently end up with - soem people are just like that, they don't get over shit, and they never move on.

That make any sense?

Me, at least I've managed to get my grudge fuck in, poor girl, whe was probobly walking funny for days - now I'm melloweed out and ready for some freindly slap and tickle.

Seems to me that social conservatives, incognizant of grudge fucking dynamics, simply project their resentment on the next object of neurotic attachment, sexual or otherwise, and this has got to be confusing for what is otherwise, an innocent bystander, leading to further resentment in reaction formation, etc., in spreading pattern of fractal bullshit.

And it isn't always a lover, it can be parent, etc.

It's an imperfect world: it requires the full attention of your intellect to deal with the flaw, which is the imperfection in reality,k the grain of sand at the center of the perfect pearl, unity.

One, but we're not the same.

 

[amicus]

Excessive...you are always so much more fun when you are, 'fucked up', at least in the context of this forum and I shall be a gentleman and not tell you specifically why.

Suffice it to say than man does not live by or for sex or any of the derivatives, only. The male is a particularly rational animal, or can be be, with some amount of effort, and grudge fucks, may or may not be a portion of a rational mans repertoire.

This is not just an objective observation, nor even an hypothetical one based on reason and logic, but has a smidgen of anecdotal, or personal experience to flavor the stew.

Only fat ugly women with high IQ's ever indulge in the sciences, (there are exceptions as there always are) but in general that be a truism.

They can, with some dedicated effort, approach the objectivity that comes so naturally to the male under stressful conditions.

The concept of monogamy, the lifelong bonding of a male and female for mutual satisfaction including all the perquisites, would seem, to any rational, objective observer of the human condition, the, 'ideal' circumstance with which to structure ones life.

Does it apply to all, in all times and places and circumstances, of course not, nothing does. But in a normative sense, it is a simple self evident truism, that monogamy is the preferred lifestyle for all involved.

Thas my story and I'm stickin to it.

Amicus...

 

[xssve]

Heh, you're such a twat.

 

[amicus]

Heh, you're such a twat.

~~~

Yeah, but you love my mind...don't worry, I will never tell anyone and you will never admit it, so we are home free.


Ami...the twat....

 

[xssve]

Dude, really.

 

[AllardChardon]

Monogamy as the "ideal". I love ideals. Like working for yourself instead of someone else and making a good living at it, is a great ideal. Being in perfect shape without having to spend much time maintaining it due to an active lifestyle would be ideal for me. I could go on forever about my ideals, but then reality slaps me in the face.

How does an idealist live in the real world? I have never reconciled this and think I may have become more skeptical than when I was younger. So many of my perceived ideals for life are struggling for survival. People being allowed to smoke marijuana without legal recourse is an ideal I thought would be a reality by now. No, alas, I am sad to say, it morphed into a war on drugs.

Have I given up on ideals? No way. I just can't get them to mesh with reality. Like the square peg in the round hole. My marriage was the same. But no sour grapes here. I have four wonderful grown up children who will be having dinner with my ex-husband, the father, and me, their mother.

Being honest with our children about our problems with the marriage made it more bearable for all. We did not break the family, just our union. We were able to remain friends and support each other at the same time. This happened when my youngest was two and he is almost 18. So, for 16 years, we have co-parented our children and kept the family intact, without physically loving each other. We are the exception, not the norm. And it worked for us.

I will not hesitate to post personal thoughts on a forum I have started. And I like it when others open up and post personal thoughts as well. Thank you all for making this such a lively and good thread to read.

 

[NoJo]

Could somebody please gives me the executive suammary of this thread, and the answer to the question posed by the title. I'd like to know cos there's this woman in B.C. I really want to fuck

 

[AllardChardon]

Sub Joe,

You are wanting her for monogamy or just a good old romp in the hay? Your intentions have a lot to do with the outcome. Is she married? Are you?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Of course, we all know that "Amicus" is latin for "Friend".
Our 'friend' must have acquired his name from the Ministry of Truth. I don't even care about his ad-homs and categorical malice, but I want to applaud this single sentence as a gem of amicisation;

... But in a normative sense, it is a simple self evident truism, that monogamy is the preferred lifestyle for all involved.

Classic.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

"self-evident truism", n. a position that is strongly held but logically indefensible, a prejudice.

 

[amicus]

"self-evident truism", n. a position that is strongly held but logically indefensible, a prejudice.

~~~

No, mangue, not indefensible and not a prejudice.

Equate 'self evident' the the philosophical term, 'axiomatic', the meaning is close enough for forum work.

While most of the fuzzy minded thinkers on this forum prefer a gray world of moral relativism, eschewing even the concepts of black and white or absolutes, reality jumps up and bites them in their fat asses all to often for them to enjoy the comfort of ignorance.

So, try again to ignore reality and diss anyone who speaks of it...you only waste your time and expose your shriveled roots.

Amicus...

 

[Stella_Omega]

Axiomatic concepts still must be proven-- until then, they cannot be considered axioms.
Saying something is self-evident doesn't make it so, it only shows up your capacity for self-deception.

~~~

No, mangue, not indefensible and not a prejudice.

Equate 'self evident' the the philosophical term, 'axiomatic', the meaning is close enough for forum work.

While most of the fuzzy minded thinkers on this forum prefer a gray world of moral relativism, eschewing even the concepts of black and white or absolutes, reality jumps up and bites them in their fat asses all to often for them to enjoy the comfort of ignorance.

So, try again to ignore reality and diss anyone who speaks of it...you only waste your time and expose your shriveled roots.

Amicus...

Obviously, it's worked real well for you. You've enjoyed the love and respect of one good woman, your whole life. right? Oh, wait-- your women tend to despise you once they really get to know you, by your own admission.

While morally grey myself have enjoyed thirty years of excellent, productive, satisfying, and open marriage, and am looking forward to many more.

Q.E.D. Ad absurdum.

 

[Quesla]

I know: I live with one! Don't think he grew past 19! -Quesla

 

[SimpleGifts]

Being honest with our children about our problems with the marriage made it more bearable for all. We did not break the family, just our union. We were able to remain friends and support each other at the same time. This happened when my youngest was two and he is almost 18. So, for 16 years, we have co-parented our children and kept the family intact, without physically loving each other. We are the exception, not the norm. And it worked for us.

Just wanted to say, because I didn't take the time earlier...you have my respect and admiration. I'm glad that there are parents out there like you and your (ex-)husband, who put such a high value on the emotional and physical well-being of your children.

SG

 

[AllardChardon]

Thank you, Simple Gifts,

It was not always easy. We did not allow each others lovers to come over to the house until a significant amount of time had passed and everyone wanted to meet who their parents were hanging out. My ex and I felt that the house was the family's house and since our marriage did not work out, there was no reason to flaunt that in their faces or anyone else's.

Ultimately, the lovers never got the full attention that they wanted. The family members always came first and with no way to move in on the situation, they usually got tired of sharing or vice versa and left the scene. We are still standing, I am glad to say.

Allard

 

[Stella_Omega]

I am really impressed, Glenna. It's rather rare to find a couple with your blend of pragmatism and empathy-- and loyalty to your principles, as well.

 

[AllardChardon]

Thanks Stella,

Once my children were born and looked to me for their nuturing and protection, I took my job seriously, still do and always will. I feel fortunate that I went to college and took Psychology to try and figure out why my parents were so wacked and followed it with Child Psych. I know it helped me be a better parent. It should be required before pregnancy, but alas, more regualtion is NOT the way, either.

Allard/Glenna

 

[ishtat]

I also heard that sperm of several men released inside one pussy at one time will negate each other. Women were less vulnerable to becoming pregnant while pulling a train and having a wonderful time. That is a plus plus situation, if you ask me.

No they don't!

 

[AllardChardon]

Ishtat,

No they don't what? Get pregnant less often? Do you know something here? I threw that out there wondering if anyone had any information. One woman having sex with several men does not usually result in pregnancy, the men's differing chemistry cancels out each other. I have heard that this is true from an archeologist friend of mine and I wanted to know if someone had some facts. There are alot of knowledgeable folks around here.

Allard

 

[amicus]

Ishtat,

No they don't what? Get pregnant less often? Do you know something here? I threw that out there wondering if anyone had any information. One woman having sex with several men does not usually result in pregnancy, the men's differing chemistry cancels out each other. I have heard that this is true from an archeologist friend of mine and I wanted to know if someone had some facts. There are alot of knowledgeable folks around here.

Allard

~~~

I did some research on this subject some years back, posted part of my findings here, but have long forgotten the link of the thread.

As I recal each male produces several different 'types' of sperm, some quite specialized in at least three different areas. Specific sperm and semen acts to neutralize the naturally hostile environment of the of the vagina and the uterus
as the secretions are basically spermicidal, treating the invading beasties as as alien to be killed.

Secondly there is a sperm designed especially for 'blocking', impeding, sperm from another male, actually little warrior sperm that provide a militant service for the more active ones intended for actual impregnation.

Those last are faster and healthier than the others, meant for the long haul, that three thousand mile swim up the river to the promised land of eggville.

Again, at the root of this is mother nature and her basic law of competition, the fit survive and prosper, the weak fall by the wayside and eventually go extinct.

Ain't it wunnerful?

Amicus....

 

[AllardChardon]

Thank you for that informative response, I should have known it would be you as you have a diverse mind that I enjoy.

But did you actually answer my basic question, bluntly put, "Will multiple ejaculations from several men bring on pregnancy?"

I would be nice to know if pulling a train prevents pregnancy? LOL

Not that I am at risk any longer! LOL

But the few trains I pulled in my very nasty youth were without protection, (long before AIDS and the rest of today's STD list that keeps on growing), and worried I might get pregnant with all that sperm everywhere, but Thank God, I was spared. I mean who could I say was the father, until maybe, the child looked just like one of the seven. LOL

Life was wild in the sixties!

 

[amicus]

Not sure I understand what, 'pulling the train' means, unless it is multiple partners in those wild and crazy 60's of free love....

And it would seem to me, that the law of averages applies concerning the amount and variety of sperm competing to fertilize that reluctant egg, the more that are trying, the better the chances of success?

I forgot to mention than in addition to that research, was the information that women during their fertile period, even those married ones and ones with supposedly loyal affairs, in over fifty percent of cases had the sperm of more than one donor happily competing for the right to exist in the future.

The ladies of Lit did not appreciate my discovery or my humor in suggesting that the biology of sex, concerning the female, was less concerned with fidelity than with procreation....grins....

ah, but then, I have always been a curmudgeon, misidentified as a troll, which indeed I am not....grins....

Thank you for the compliment...they may blacklist you here because of your kind and gentle treatment of the one whose name shall not be spoken...


ahem...


Amicus...

 

[AllardChardon]

You are all right in my book, Amicus. Just cuz we don't see eye to eye shouldn't interfere with a good argument. Or as I used to love to say, "If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen."

 

[Quesla]

Quesla here: I don't know about Amicus, but I believe that because different people grow at different rates mentally and personality wise: A pair cannot possibly be life long permanent mates and be completely satisfied! I as a dynamic personality feel that I'm growing and changing much faster than my mate. I have not practiced my right as a fe male tand wiccan to pick the best male possible, but That's how I believe that the evolutionary system works. This is not to say that we women are promiscuous sluts! But it means that we are very choosey and even more so as we get older! I firmly wish that my monogamous mate would drop out of the race sometimes! *Sigh!* Quesla

 

[AllardChardon]

Quesla,

As I said in my original post, I was bored by monogamy for 13 miserable years. I was in a desert and dying of thirst. It was not until I left my unattentive husband and struck off for the distance that I found an oasis and I am not going back. I called it using my 'Get Out Of Jail Card' for real.

My husband never cheated on me, he bored me to death. I never cheated on him. I left the relationship and put myself back in the market and he had to watch me date, poor bastard. Watch me come home knowing I got laid. Oh well, he was married to me and did not have the time.

I hope your husband wakes up, because if he doesn't, he is going to regret it when you walk out the door to save yourself from drowning in monogamy. Mine didn't and does he regret it now. Too bad. Once a woman is done, you better get out of the way.

Allard